They call it the Ultimate Ship Tour. Ultimate Ship Snore, I thought, when reading about this new feature on Ruby Princess. Yet there I was, in line to get a taste of what it's all about during our two-day cruise to nowhere on the new ship last week, little knowing I was about to be enthralled and forced to eat a substantial slice of humble pie.
The real tour lasts about two and a half hours and takes you to all kinds of places you never knew you wanted to visit - the ship's laundry, print shop, medical centre and photo lab. We didn't get to stop at these but all necks were craning as we walked past tantalising open doors. We really did want to visit them after all.
What we did get to do was climb into the funnel - no I didn't know what that was all about either, but look at a picture of a Princess ship and focus on the grill on which the logo is mounted; I was behind there. The pictures below were taken inside of the funnel, the bottom one looking out through the grill.
We went up to deck 18, but there are ladders right up to deck 21, 60 metres above sea level. No, was the short answer when I asked it we could go to the top.
Then we went down to the engine control room, the heart and soul of the ship, according to chief technical officer Robin Sutherland, who gave us a fascinating insight into the ship's engines, propulsion and the hi-tech waste water systems.
Yes I know it sounds nurdish, but it was really interesting - and I loved the idiot's guide to waste on the computer, which had a picture of a toilet to denote black water and a sink to illustrate grey.
Last stop was the food stores, where about 150 tons of eats and drinks is kept - that's just per cruise - and from whence comes the necessary bits to create around 20,000 meals a day.
Paying passengers will also visit the galley, where they will be served champagne, caviar and canapes and be presented with a chef's coat, go back stage at the theatre and have bubbly and strawberries on the Bridge, and their picture taken with the Captain.
All that for a cool $150 per person, which sounds a lot but as only 12 people per cruise will get to do it, I reckon passengers will snap it up, if only because it is so exclusive.
After all, how many people do you know who have been in a cruise ship's funnel? The folks at home can't help but be impressed.
Jane Archer
