Cruise Lines

Next time you moan about forking out $20 or $25 to eat in a cruise ship's speciality restaurant, spare a thought for the poor souls on Silversea vessels.

On Silversea's Silver Wind (and actually all the ships in the Silversea fleet except Prince Albert II), a night out in the speciality restaurant will set you back $200 a head. Yes really. But boy, do you get a night to remember for your $200!

As you sit down you are presented with a menu bearing your name (a copy is waiting for you later in your suite) and Bharati, the excellent maitre d' and sommelier - and also a bit of a dab hand when it comes to taking photos - and Raj, the waiter in Le Champagne, start to work their magic. Between them can't do enough to make the evening really special.

And then there is the wonderful food, all carefully prepared by Ryan, chef of Le Champagne, and the excellent wines. After a welcome glass of Champagne, you launch into the food and Bharati serves a specially-picked wine to go with each course. Pouring only after explaining its finer qualities, of course.

As you can see, by the end of the evening I was disappearing behind the glasses - there were another two wines to come after this picture was taken!

I was there for the Burgundy night, but there is also a Bordeaux one, an Italian one, a North American one and a Spanish one. Menus change every two days.

Whichever you choose, Bharati won't book more than 16 people per evening, spread out over a maximum five tables, so the experience is very special. In fact, when I dined there it was just me and two friends. Brilliant.

If the $200 price tag sounds just a little too high (actually it doesn't even cover the cost of the wine), you can pay just $30 per person to enjoy the food, but with this option you also have to pay for the wine (whereas it's free everywhere else on the ship). "We have wine for $1,800 a bottle," Bharati tells me.

Makes the degustation menu sound a bargain.

Seems I'm not the only person who dislikes fixed dining. A Cruise Critic poll has found the thought of sharing a table with other passengers was the Brits' least favourite thing about cruising.

I don't know what reason others have, but mine are simple. Too often I've been stuck on a table for seven nights, trying to make conversation with people with whom I have nothing in common and who are, frankly, boring. One night is fine - you can do all the usual who-are-you stuff. Then it's time to move on and do the same with another bunch.

Give me a dine-when-you-like option anytime when you can either sit with different people each night or just with your partner.

Even the Captain is seen as an undesirable when it comes to dining companions. More than a fifth said their first thought on receiving an invitation to the Captain's table was "how do I get out of this?" How times have changed. An invitation to the Captain's Table used to signify the pinnacle of your cruising career.

The poll also found the Brits cruise on their stomachs. Some 60% said a cruiseline's reputation for quality cuisine would affect their choice of cruise, while 63% said the best thing about dining on board is the quality of the food. Hmmm. Not so sure about that one.

It's true that some cruiselines so serve good food, but mostly it's fairly run-of-the-mill stuff with a posh name to appeal to the most unadventurous palate; invariably it's served lukewarm (for all the pomp and ceremony in the main dining rooms, it is still mass catering with food cooked well in advance).

When dining companions go into raptures over what is essentially meat and two veg by another name I have wonder what these people eat at home.

Interestingly, 53% said they pay extra to go in the speciality restaurant at least once or twice when they cruise. James Martin, who works with Ocean Village, was the favourite celebrity chef, followed by Marco Pierre White and Gary Rhodes, who have restaurants on P&O Cruises' ships.

I do like James Martin but guess who my favourite is?

Windstar Cruises has opened an alfresco dining option on Wind Star and Wind Spirit, its two smallest ships holding just 148 passengers. Called Candles, the restaurant is actually the back deck of each ship, dressed up in the evening with steaks and skewers on the menu.

The only surprise here is that neither ship has this alfresco dining option already. I ate in Candles when I cruised on Wind Surf last December (it was introduced on the ship last summer) and it's a lovely experience.

The food and service were great and it's all very romantic - dinner under the stars gazing into the eyes of the one you love.

Unless, that is, you have longish hair and it's a windy night. My top tip: don't sit at a table at the very aft end of the deck!

What bad timing. On the one hand Regent Seven Seas Cruises releases a few pictures of the $40 million refurbishment of Seven Seas Mariner and Seven Seas Voyager.

At the same time, comes news that Voyager, on its World Cruise, is limping along to Dubai, having had to cancel calls at Mumbai and Abu Dhabi, where engineers are waiting to fix a propulsion pod damaged off Singapore when it got tangled in fishing nets.

It's still a good excuse to show some of the changes, which included a new grill restaurant, Prime 7 (pictured below), where Latitudes used to be, a new pizza oven and ice cream bar and new carpets, upholstery and wallpaper in the public areas and suites.

Regent's third ship, Seven Seas Navigator, is due to get its facelift in October 2010.

Nobuyuki "Nobu" Matsuhisa, the man generally credited with having introduced the western world to sushi, is joining Crystal Serenity's Venice to Athens cruise departing July 28.

Nobu already has restaurants on both Crystal Cruises' ships - Serenity and Symphony. There's the Silk Road for his famous Japanese-with-a-Peruvian-twist-style dining and the Sushi Bar for those who fancy a finger-sized bite of raw fish.

While on board, he will be preparing meals for the Silk Road, signing books and hosting cooking demonstrations.

The 12-night cruise costs from £4,285 per person including flights, transfers, soft drinks and all the sushi you can eat (there is some other food too). You'll also get $2,000 per couple shipboard credit through the promotion called "As you wish". You can spend it on drinks, shore excursions, in the spa. Basically as you wish.

What is it about cruising people that makes them want to see crew making food, washing dishes and ironing shirts?

I spend most of my time in ships these days, but I can honestly say that in the days when my overseas stays were more land-based, I was never asked by the hotel receptionists if I wanted to sign up for a tour of the laundry or kitchen.

Yet cruisers will stump up vast sums of money to see all the things they have come on holiday to forget. Or at least I thought that's what this holiday lark was all about.

Yet even my cynical self enjoyed the Behind the Scenes tour I did with Princess Cruises last November at the launch of Ruby Princess, but forget galleys and laundrys. The bit I liked was going into the funnel and seeing the engine control room, where computers indicate black water with a picture of a toilet. I reckon even I could operate the ship with guidance like that.

I know some of the men wanted to see the actual engine room, but I've been in a few in my time and they are hot, noisy and windowless. Put it another way, if you're travelling in a car would you rather sit on the comfy leather seats or under the bonnet?

Now Norwegian Cruise Line is getting in on the Behind the Scenes act, offering a similar kind of tour as Princess (bridge, laundry, galley, theatre, and more). It's available on all ships except Norwegian Majesty and just once per cruise on a sea day.

A two-hour basic tour will set you back $55 per person, splash out $150 per person and you get a seven-hour extravaganza that includes sushi-making and sake-tasting, a group photo taken on the bridge, one cup of speciality coffee, pre-dinner cocktails and dinner with a glass of wine (just the one again, I presume) in Cagney's Steakhouse.

I was in good company when I stayed at Orient-Express' Hotel Splendido in Portofino this week, following my visit to see the new Seabourn Odyssey.

Winston Churchill, Richard Burton, Liza Minnelli, Ringo Starr, Rod Stewart, Egon Ronay, Larry Hagman, Billy Joel, Steven Spielberg and Naomi Campbell have all passed through the hotel's doors over the past 50 or so years. I trust they will now be adding my name to the list.

Seriously, I'm not surprised so many famous people have been there. It is a truly gorgeous hotel - the rooms, the service, the food. As ever I was the fussy one at dinner, but three courses of delicious pasta and vegetables just for me were produced alongside the set menu without anyone even batting an eyelid.

When I mentioned that I had always looked at the hotel from afar when in the area on a cruise, Angelica Aliberti, the PR manager, said cruisers visiting Portofino or Saint Margherita are welcome to visit and they will happily show you around the hotel. Combine that with a walk in the woods between the two towns and you'll have a fabulous day out.

In case you're not going to be there soon, here are some pictures to whet your appetite - a suite, similar but not the same as mine, the view from the balcony, the Terrace restaurant at night and the hotel as seen from Portofino.

Just a word of warning. Before you fall too deeply in love, you might want to check out the rates. I was planning a romantic weekend there as soon as I saw my suite, but on second thoughts I think I'll just hang on for the pay rise.

You've no doubt already seen news that The Blue Man Group will be performing on Norwegian Cruise Line's new ship Norwegian Epic.

I was one of the lucky few from the UK to go out to a steamy New York (temperatures in the early 80sF) for two nights this week to hear first hand the last big news about what is going to be on board this mega 4,200-passenger ship when it launches in July 2010.

Our first full day started with a trip to the Top of the Rock - the observation deck at the top of the Rockefella Plaza. The original deck's design was inspired by the ocean liner's of the era (there's the cruiseing link!), complete with deck chairs.

They've long gone - the Observation Deck was shut for 20 years and reopened in 2005 after renovation work - but it's definitely worth a visit if you're in town, for the magnificent views.

The guys from NCL laid on a great event, attended by around 300 journalists and travel agents, following the presentation about the new entertainment with a cut-down version of The Blue Man show in the delightful little theatre in Astor Place where the blue thing all began. There is still a show there, but it's now also in six other venues around the world.

The show is certainly different and will no doubt be very popular, but it's not to my taste. Instead, I'm looking forward to the new Cirque Dreams and Dinner, where you eat while watching a two-hour show featuring acrobats, jugglers, contortionists and the like.

NCL's executive vice-president global sales and passenger services Andy Stuart promised he wasn't joking when he said performers will be coming down from the ceiling to refill diners' water glasses!

If it's anything like the great theatrical dining experience in NCL's Teppanyaki Room they are on to a winner here.

There will be two set-time dinner shows a night on at least six days of every cruise, in a venue themed to look like a rather garish big top.

Just so they can say it's the first big top at sea, I guess.

It's been a few days since I disembarked Queen Mary 2 in Southampton so it's time for some last thoughts about the ship.

I still find it strange to reflect that it took me seven hours to get to New York and five days at sea to get back to the UK, with no sign of land at all. "Is this the view all the way," one of the passengers mused at breakfast on the first morning, while looking out at the horizon. I said I thought it probably was. He didn't look overly impressed.

On first walk-about, QM2 is a confusing ship, especially if you are a regular cruiser, because nothing is where it should be. But it all soon falls into place.

The self-service, always aft on one of the top decks on modern ships, is on deck seven and mid-ships because the Princess and Queens Grill restaurants - these are the ones for the higher-paying passengers - are aft.

Likewise, the theatre isn't at the front of the ship; instead there is a huge another part of the ship forward of the theatre containing the Planetarium.

I watched three different shows there - they are free but you should pick up tickets in the morning to guarantee a seat - and loved them. Didn't always follow the narrative - at one showing in particular the snoring man in front kept grabbing my attention! - but the effects were great, planets whizzing about the dome, collisions, explosions and so on.

A bit of rough weather (which thankfully we didn't have) and you'd think you were at a theme park.

The show was only marred by the ridiculous safety warnings broadcast at the start of each show. I could just about live with the spiel about locating the emergency exits (but they don't ask you to do that when in the theatre, self-service, dining room, etc) but what was the bit about banging your leg on a protruding table as you leave the seat all about?

There was very little chance anyway. Intrigued to find this table, I fumbled about but couldn't even get it to come out of its slot at the side of the seat. And I tried each time I went to the show.

Before you get the idea I am really sad, I should add you have to do something to pass the time while passengers bumble around trying to work out what "sit in the red seats" means! "How difficult is it," the exasperated guy in charge said under his breath - or it should have been but I'm sure I wasn't the only one who heard him.

Illuminations, the room which houses the Planetarium, was also used for the lectures, which were the best I've seen on a ship. Interesting subjects and well presented by people who really knew their stuff.

I went to three presentations by film historian Barry Brown, who had brought lots of wonderful old film clips to illustrate his lectures, and the one about the history and restoration of the Statue of Liberty by art historian and conservator Christine Rousell was the talk of the ship.

Apparently when Frenchman Frederic Bartholdi had this plan to build a colossal statue (that is the technical term), his plan was for it to stand at the entrance to the Suez Canal, but the Egyptians turned down the idea because it was too expensive. He then offered to America as a gesture of the friendship between France and the US.

Both countries had huge problems trying to raise money for the project, but finally they did, although it meant it was finished 10 years behind schedule, in 1886. Almost 100 years on some French engineers went up the statue and saw it was falling apart. Cue Christine and her team to set things right.

It took the best part of three years and $150 million but they did it. She said the crown is being reopened this summer but for just 30 people at a time. Expect long queues.

I was less enthralled with the art auctions - and so were all the other passengers if the lack of bidding was anything to go by. These events are so tacky I'm surprised they even have them on QM2. I was also surprised to see those awful car boot-type stalls set up in the corridors on a ship where, I was told, they carry guests, not passengers, in staterooms, not cabins. Oh and of course the ship is actually a liner.

It makes it all sound so sophisticated and refined, but you soon realise Cunard is only out to make money, money, money, just like any other line.

There are some big rooms, especially the Queens Room, where afternoon tea is served by waiters in white gloves (tradition, tradition) and all the dressy folk go to dance in the evening.

Another couple of surprises. When I went to the Queens Room one evening, they were holding a Miss Queen or some such competition. It was just not in keeping with the elegance of the room and the evening. Also, there are three formal nights on a six-night transatlantic crossing and most people do dress for the occasion - it's part of the Cunard thing - but there were quite a few who just didn't bother. And they got away with it.

The ship has lots of small bars, which gives QM2 a small ship feel. My favourite hangout was the Chart Room, a popular place thanks to the jazz band that played there every evening.

My biggest complaint about the ship was the dining. If you are in the standard class cabins you eat in Britannia Restaurant. Two sittings, set tables. Easy and traditional (that word again), as Cunard likes to be, but not really to my taste.

If you are in a Princess Grill cabin, as I was, you dine in the Princess Grill, if you are in the Queens Grill cabin your table is in the Queens Grill. Both are small restaurants, much more intimate than the Britannia. Easy so far, but crucially you don't have a set time to dine.

That normally works for me. Turn up, join others who have also just arrived and dine together. It's a nice social occasion. Ah, but that's not how it works here. Grills passengers are allocated a table so you could turn up just when the others are finishing eating, as happened to me the first evening.

It made for a very awkward dinner as they clearly felt it would be rude to leave me, but I felt equally unhappy eating while being watched and trying to make conversation.

I guess it was partly my fault as I was asked before the trip if I wanted to share a table or dine alone. So great. The other option would have been to dine on my own each night.

"It doesn't work because you are alone," the hotel manager David Stephenson told me. So there are no single passengers on the ship? I don't think so. Actually, the system wouldn't necessarily work for me if I was with a partner. Mine was a table for eight. I would not want to sit on a table of that size with just one other person either.

Luckily, it wasn't too much of an issue as I dined one night in Lotus - part of the self-service by day that becomes a waiter service Asian restaurant in the evening. The food was delicious.

The lovely maitre d' in the Princess Grill, Sandro Ranieri, also arranged for me and a companion to eat in Todd English one evening - $30 per head extra, but again the food was very good (had to take out a mortgage for a bottle of wine mind!) - and he also got me a table in the Queens Grill, which was actually just like the Princess Grill, except this time I was dining alone.

No matter. Osman Pinaroglu, the charming maitre d', came over regularly to see all was OK and the service was good, even though the waiters were rushed off their feet. The wine waiter was less impressed with me. I just browsed his menu to make a note of the prices. "You don't want to buy a bottle," he asked. Not at those prices I didn't.

I see on Cruise Critic that one of last bastions of the fixed dining tyranny is crumbling.

One of their sharp-eyed members spotted a reference, since removed, to Celebrity Select Dining on Celebrity Cruises' US website, sparking an "are they aren't they debate". It seems they are, but are just not quite ready to tell the cruising world about it yet.

It had to happen - in fact I am amazed Celebrity has taken so long to move on this, especially as Holland America Line, its main rival, took the leap a couple of years ago, offering As you wish dining alongside fixed for the growing number of cruisers who don't want to be told when and where to eat when they are on holiday.

I endured something similar in a Russian hotel in 1977, but then Communism ruled and we all shook our hands in sadness at such a defunct system.

Judging by the Cruise Critic message boards, the move by Celebrity will be very welcome. One member bemoans the end of elegant dining, but I'm with DaveFr who asks how dining with 1,000 others in a noisy room with waiters dashing back and forth can be considered particularly elegant.

Bring it on Celebrity, and the sooner the better.

Finally, some information about Oceania Cruises' new ship Marina, which launches at the end of next year - and it's all to do with food.

I guess we shouldn't be surprised at that given they are calling it a ship for epicureans on account of it having 10 places to eat. I know that doesn't sound so many these days, but it is on a vessel the size of Marina, which will hold just 1,258 passengers.

The ship will have a culinary arts centre with individual workstations, where passengers can learn to cook alongside the ship's top chef. Classes will last anything from 45 minutes to three hours (and this is a holiday?) and cater for every level, from "how do I break an egg" beginners to "veal in its own jus" dinner party types.

The chef will also take passengers on tours of local markets and maybe arrange private tastings at local wineries. Now that sounds more like it. Sign me up!

Marina will also have a new five-course de gustustation (sic) restaurant, Red Ginger, featuring food from Thailand, Japan and Vietnam. Fresh interpretations of Asian classics are promised, which sounds great, unless of course you are particularly partial to those Asian classics, in which case it might be disappointing!

It's a sampling menu, which means you'll get bits of everything, that will take you on an Asian culinary adventure (president Bob Binder's words, not mine but it sounds good).

Have to say, the sample menu sounds delicious. Sign me up for that too!

Celebrity Cruises has confirmed that starting September, passengers will be able to opt for fixed dining or go for the new Select system, which allows them to choose a time to dine.

They have gone for an incredibly complicated system though - which is no doubt why they have given themselves until September to put it in place.

Passengers can pre-book their preferred dining time for the duration of the cruise, or pre-book different dining times. Or if they pre-book and then if they want to change when they are on board, they can do that too.

Having experienced first-hand P&O Cruises making a complete hash of its Freedom dining on Ventura because it allowed people to book, I can't help wondering how Celebrity is going to manage this.

I am also struggling to understand the point of the new system, which seems simply to allow passengers to fix another time to dine rather than giving them flexibility to just go and eat when they want to.

"We don't want Celebrity passengers having to queue to get a table," Lisa Lutoff-Perlo, Celebrity Cruises senior vice-president hotel operations, told me.

To my mind, Celebrity Select also misses one of the key points of these new flexible dining systems, namely giving passengers the option to dine alone with your partner if that's what you wish, rather than share a table with complete strangers.

Lutoff-Perlo said diners are unlikely to get a table for two as there are so few in the dining rooms on Celebrity ships, but she promises people won't be put on a table where passengers are already halfway through their meal.

Which is something I guess.

A milestone in the short history of P&O Cruises' new ship, Azura, was reached on Friday when the valves of the dry dock at the Monfalcone shipyard, near Trieste, Italy, opened so water could hit the hull for the first time.

The float-out is always a big occasion for a new cruise ship - it's the moment when the superstructure is finished and the shipyard can turn its attention to fitting out the interior - so naturally it wasn't going to pass without ceremony.

But first we were able to have a quick peek inside the ship, which launches next April.

In terms of size and layout, Azura is a sister to Ventura, but in style the two siblings could not be more different. Ventura was a bit of a rebel, but Azura is going back to P&O's heartland, out to attract the line's regular cruisers.

This will be Sindhu (if you know Ventura, it's where East is, but unlike East it will open out onto the corridor), an Indian fine dining restaurant created by Michelin-starred chef Atul Kochhar.

It won't be blow-your-mind hot stuff, he tells me (shame because that's what I really love), but he promises he will be using a lot of spices, so the food should be packed with taste. Atul is also creating an Indian tapas-style menu that will be served in a seating area around the restaurant's open kitchen.

Below is The Glass House (Las Ramblas on Ventura), where TV wine expert Olly Smith is creating a wine-cum-dining experience.

Each course will be accompanied by a different wine, which will be "presented" to diners in a lively and passionate Olly-style spiel (tune into Saturday Kitchen to see him in action). "It won't be in a bow tie or pretentious way", he promised. "Enjoying wine should be all about informality and having fun."

Sadly that was to be Olly's last word on the matter because when he saw where The Glass House will be, he was rendered speechless - he reckons for the first time in his life. "It's amazing, brilliant," he managed as he surveyed the huge area. Personally I think a bit of work on the decor might not go amiss but hey, who am I?

Seriously though, Olly has already picked the 32 wines that will be served in The Glass House, and also the glassware ("it's got to show off the wine but be strong enough to survive life on a cruise ship"), and is now concentrating on getting people trained and sorting out things like storage issues so the wine is always served in peak condition.

As The Glass House will be as much about Olly's presentation as the wines, P&O is planning to run a competition to find an Olly number two, who will be doing the theatricals when the main man himself can't be there, which will be most of the time.

The quick look-see over (the top is Malabar, the Tamarind Club on Ventura, below is me with the adult-only Retreat in the background), we watched as a £2 coin and euro were welded at the foot of the ship's mast for good luck. Here is Carnival UK chief executive officer David Dingle wielding the iron ...

...and then headed dockside for speeches, a blessing, and to see the madrina Amanda Dowds, wife of Azura's captain Keith Dowds, press the button that sent a bottle of Italian Prosecco smashing into the ship's hull, signaling the moment for the valves to open and the water to be allowed in.

A madrina (or godmother) at this stage of the construction, by the way, is Italian shipyard tradition. Amanda is godmother of the float-out, but there will be another godmother to name the ship.

Sea trials are planned for the end of the year and P&O Cruises takes delivery of the ship on March 31. There will be a few days of inaugural celebrations in Southampton before the ship's maiden voyage, a Mediterranean cruise departing April 12.

Cruise.co.uk has been running a "who is the ugliest of them all" poll with Royal Caribbean International's mega Oasis of the Seas pitched against Norwegian Cruise Line's Norwegian Epic.

Sorry NCL, but I reckon Oasis has it - just. I would have to agree with the majority, but again, only just. I love Spartan of Kent's comment that Epic looks gas powered - the lump on top being the box with the gas. Bet the villa passengers booked to go in the "box" will love that.

But as Roberto Martonoli, NCL's president and chief operating officer, pointed out to me last month when I was in New York to learn about the Blue Man Group, it doesn't really matter what the ship looks like from the outside. It's what the passengers enjoy inside that matters. He has a point. And Epic promises some great new features, as indeed does Oasis.

As well as going head to head in the beauty stakes, the ships appear to be competitors when it comes to places to eat. And sorry, NCL, but Oasis again seems in the lead, having just announced it has 24 "distinct" dining venues.

They include 150 Central Park, serving the latest cruise ship dining must-have - a tasting menu and wine pairings - and Giovanni's Table, also in Central Park. which is a casual replacement for Portofino, the classy Italian found on other Royal ships. Chops Grille and Johnny Rockets are back, and there are some new healthy places to eat, including a pastry cafe, pizza and burger bar, a Donut (sic) Shop and Ice Cream Parlor (sic).

Yes, that was a joke. Passengers will either have to pack a huge dollop of self-discipline or some outsized clothes to get them home. Or maybe they'll keep fit walking to and from the restaurants on this giant of a ship.

If my experience on Freedom of the Seas is anything to go by (and it is half the size of Oasis) some stout walking shoes wouldn't be a bad idea either.

European Waterways is offering a six-week, 1,000-mile journey from Avignon to Amsterdam on the hotel barge Anjodi, which rose to fame a few years back when Rick Stein and his film crew were on board to make a 400-mile French Odyssey for TV.

Stein won't be on this journey, but it sounds as if it'll be pretty good without him, visiting cities such as Lyon, Paris and Cologne, cruising the Rhone, Seine and Rhine and the Canal de Bourgogne (the canal, 150 miles long, with 209 locks, connects the Med to the Atlantic via the Yonne and Seine to the Saône and Rhone). The full itinerary is here.

You'll spend the days cruising, sightseeing and enjoying good food, prepared by the on-board chef, and wine from the regions you are sailing through. And you'll have to do that for six weeks, from November 8 to December 18. How tough is that!

Anjodi is small, with room for just eight passengers in four cabins, and looks lovely with lots of wood panelling and brass. All the accommodation is en-suite with air-conditioning, and there is a sun deck with heated sunken jacuzzi.

Prices start from £15,000 per person including all food, an open bar and excursions. Alternatively, you can charter the vessel for £110,000.

One of the first things I wanted to see when I was on Celebrity Cruises' new ship Celebrity Equinox last week was how the grass was looking.

In June, when I was on the ship for the conveyance down the River Ems, it was looking very sorry indeed. More brown than green. Just you wait, I was told, mainly by Celebrity's president and chief executive officer Dan Hanrahan.

And he was right. Now it is a lovely green, just perfect for sitting on (well it would be if you were somewhere warm; in fact it was a little damp thanks to wonderful British summer) and for this game of boules I spotted. On one of the inaugural days they even had a crocquet match, which I believe Travel Weekly's team won.

In the latest Cruise.co.uk ratings, Thomson not only comes top for entertainment, but also holds poll position for best food and best crew.

In fact, in the entertainment category, Thomson has three ships in the top five, while in the best crew section, it holds first, second and third place. Quite a result.

As ever with this type of poll, one has to be a bit circumspect and the results do tend to change with the wind so when you look it could all be a bit different. Nevertheless, it gives an indication of what each line is doing well.

Thomson also comes second in the cruiselines top 10. Here's the full table:

1 - Cunard

2 - Thomson Cruises

3 - Princess Cruises

4 - Ocean Village

5 - P&O Cruises

6 - Royal Caribbean International

7 - Celebrity Cruises

8 - Fred Olsen Cruise Lines

9 - Island Cruises

10 - Norwegian Cruise Line

Interesting to see Ocean Village at number 4. The cruiseline is being disbanded by Carnival UK apparently because it couldn't be made to pay. If only all the people who liked it so much had been prepared to pay a bit more for their flycruise it would have survived.

Or would it? Cruise Critic says P&O Cruises has been asking passengers what they would think if it were to offer flycruises from, say, Palma and Crete. Rather as Ocean Village does.

Could it be that Ocean Village had to go, to make room for P&O?

Yesterday was the first sea day on Crystal Serenity so this is a good moment to reflect on what Crystal Cruises is all about.

The cruiseline is a bit of hybrid - definitely up there with its six-star peers if you equate luxury with service, but the odd one out against other ultra-lux lines Silversea, Regent Seven Seas Cruises and Yachts of Seabourn in that it retains traditional two-sitting dinner in the evening and you have to pay for alcohol (but soft drinks are free).

Serenity is also the biggest ship in the ultra-lux fleet - actually not much different in size to QE2, but where QE2 squeezed in 1,700 passengers, Serenity only holds 1,070. And on this cruise, from Piraeus (for Athens) to Barcelona, there are only 550 of us. Which means we are outnumbered by the 655 crew.

No wonder we are being treated like royalty!

Actually that was a joke, because when I was on this ship last September I was still treated like royalty, and then they had to cope with a full complement of passengers.

Many of the are crew are Croatian, Hungarian and Bulgarian and so many have names beginning with Z that I am beginning to wonder if that is one of the main qualifications for working on Crystal! As well as having a captivating smile and slightly cheeky sense of humour.

Any passengers who thought today's sea day was time to relax would have been sorely disappointed as there was a packed schedule of lectures (Math and the Mona Lisa or the Presidency of Barack Obama anyone?), Italian lessons, a free wine tasting, which I still cannot believe I managed to miss, golf, team trivia, ballroom dancing, needlepoint - yes, really - music and computer classes. Phew.

And somehow everyone had to find time to get ready for the first formal night as well.

What has really surprised me is the number of children and teens on this cruise, which, let's face it, is an expensive line to bring kids on. Ilana has been out in the evenings and much of today with her new friends, who all seem to be enjoying themselves but are not upsetting non-kid fraternity in the process.

Strangely under-18s they are not allowed to be in anywhere with a bar after 11pm unless they are with an adult, which seems a bit harsh as that's just the time Ilana does not want mum hanging around. So she and her friends walk around the ship, sometimes nipping into a lounge just to see if they can get away with it.

I couldn't possibly say any more.

Although I am not a fan of fixed dining, so far things have worked fine, mainly because we keep moving around so haven't had been in the same place twice. The first night we changed from an empty table of eight, where we looked very sad indeed, to one for just two, the next night it was open seating anyway as a lot of passengers were at an evening concert at Ephesus, so we had a different table for two.

Two waiters but both called Zoltan. See what I mean about the Zs?

Tuesday night we were in Prego, the Italian restaurant, which is my favourite and serves the best mushroom soup ever, last night we were back in the restaurant but this time on a table for 10. I think we will be at the same table tonight, hopefully sitting with the people who were at the other end to us as we have exhausted conversation with the ones we were with.

We would also like to try Tastes one evening - that's a casual eatery by the Neptune pool, and we'll be dining Nobu-style on Saturday, before we disembark Sunday. The speciality restaurants are all free, incidentally, but they recommend a $7 per person gratuity. Given the level of service, I don't think anyone could have a problem with that.

Tastes is in a glass-roofed "conservatory", set around a small pool, and also open for a late served breakfast, which is a lovely alternative to the self-service and much lighter and brighter than the dining room. Yesterday it was also dressed up for a special Cuisine of the Sun Mediterranean lunch buffet.

I took these pictures before it opened, planning to return to eat later but lost track of time and managed to miss it altogether, so I ended up having a late lunch in the Bistro, where you can help yourself to cold meats, pates, bread, cheeses, fruit and French bread.

Leave out the cheese and add a glass or two of white wine and you have my idea of heaven.

Cheers!

Two days ago I was going to write that I had been sitting next to a group of passengers booked on the Chef's Table for dinner one evening on Ruby Princess and tell you what I saw of their experience, but things suddenly changed and thanks to a cancellation my partner and I ended up being two of the select few on our cruise to take part in this special dining option.

It only happens three times per cruise, and for just 10 passengers each time, who each pay $75 to take part.

That first evening it happened to be a group of friends, all from Australia, who said it had been worth every penny as they rolled out of the dining room after their feast. When Mark and I took part, we were with four other couples, all from the US, who had never met until that point.

"It can be either a group or people who have never met, but always we are over-subscribed," Generoso, the Maitre d' and Princess Cruises' very own Mr Fixit, explained.

I call him that, by the way, because he organised for us to sample the breakfast in Sabatini's, the Italian trattoria, even though it is normally reserved only for passengers in suites.

It's a relatively new thing for Princess and a wonderfully peaceful experience, away from the maddening crowds in the self-service, but in a room with a view (as it's on deck 16), unlike the main dining room, which is lovely. Naturally the food is cooked to order so it's hot, and of course served in style. If you're not sure whether to book a suite or not, this is the reason to do so!

The Chef's Table evening starts by the lifts outside the dining room, where we donned chef's coats before being escorted into the galley to meet executive chef Joel and start on part one of the feast - a glass (or two) of Champagne and five appetisers while we were standing in a corner of the galley that had been decorated just for us by pastry chef Andrzej from Poland.

It really was a quick look on Saturday, when Oceania Cruises' Regatta was in Dover for a turnaround - on at 10.45am, off at 2.30pm, but long enough to remind me why I like these former Renaissance ships just in time for Wednesday, when I will be cruising on one of her sisters - Princess Cruises' Royal Princess in the Black Sea.

But more of that later.

It's an exciting time for Oceania, which has the three sisters (the others are Insignia and Nautica, also former R vessels) but is also launching a new ship, Marina, next year. Or at least that's the plan, but I gather there is some debate going on as to whether it's a good idea to launch at the end of 2010 when people's minds are on the festive seas, or wait and come out in early 2011, when hopefully they are thinking of holidays - and specifically cruising.

Whichever it is, as Marina will be almost twice as big as the sisters, holding 1,252 passengers instead of 684, you can expect to hear a lot more about Oceania in the coming months as sales step up a gear.

Back to Regatta....

I was on the ship with several agents and we managed to see a standard balcony cabin - OK but quite small - and a Penthouse (pictured below), which is a real step up in size and presentation and come with a butler. Apparently these are popular with passengers who usually travel with the ultra-luxury lines because they are a good size, but quite a bit cheaper.

Well they should be because you don't get the free drinks (alcoholic and soft), although for summer 2010, Oceania is including soft drinks and bottled water in the price.

Bernie Carter, Oceania's UK sales and marketing director, said the standard suites on Marina will be close in size to the Regatta penthouses, which should make them very attractive to the ultra-luxury market.

The picture below is one of the Owners' Suites, a nice-sized room at the aft end of the ship, and below that the speciality restaurants, Toscana and Polo Grill. Every passenger gets an "allowance" in terms of the number of times they can eat in these restaurants, but they can book more evenings if there is space. There is no charge.

Bernie tells me they are just trialling a new system that will allow passengers to book the restaurants on line. "We don't like queues," he said, as we passed passengers who had just come on board standing in line to make their reservations. I can see why.

Marina, incidentally, will have these two speciality restaurants and two new ones - Red Ginger for pan-Asian dishes and Jacques, for French "comfort" food. Not sure exactly what that is but I'm thinking (probably incorrectly) cassoulet and tartiflette. These will also be free.

One of my favourite things on Regatta was these double loungers - they looked so inviting in the Dover sunshine (yes, the sun does shine there now and then). I also loved the library - it's where you get the real country house-style feel these ships are known for.

I have to admit the food was pretty good too - and they did a great job pulling out all the stops when it transpired the ship did not have my dietery requests after all.

"The best food at sea" is how Bernie describes it. But then he is a bit biased.

If you're able to cut and run in the next month, have a quick look at Ocean Village. It's offering a seven-night cruise in the Med departing from Palma, Mallorca, on October 27 from £599 per person.

That's just £85.50 a day, and you get a flight, transfers and all 24/7 buffet dining food thrown in as well. Oh, and if you can take the kids, they'll look after them for free as well.

If you'd rather hang on for a post-Christmas get away, Oceean Village has 14 nights in the Caribbean departing Barbados on December 30 from £1,329 per person.

That's just under £95 a day and again includes flights and transfers, plus the chance to visit loads of favourite islands in the sun as well - Tortola, St Maarten, St Kitts, Antigua, Dominica, Tobago, Isla Margarita , St Lucia, Grenada and St Vincent.

These prices are for online bookings, but you never know what your travel agent might have in store, especially with National Cruise Week starting on Sunday, so check that out as well.

The winning cruiselines might love it and it might make a story for the papers but at least one person is totally unimpressed with the latest results from Cruise.co.uk's regular survey of the "best" cruise lines and their ships, food, entertainment and service.

"...it must be said that some of its results are highly dubious. For example, for "best cruise line" the ranking was Cunard, Thomson, Ocean Village and Princess. No mention at all of Crystal, Regent, Seabourn or Silversea. Since when did Ocean Village become the third best cruise line in the world (or even in the UK)?"

Mark Tre of Cybercruises, who wrote this, points out, as I have in the past, that the scoring is highly flawed, biased in favour of the lines that atttract the most reviews.

Take that best cruise line category, where Cunard came top, Thomson second and Ocean Village and Princess were equal third.

"How anyone might accept that Thomson could ever be the second best cruise line and that Ocean Village ties with Princess for third is ludicrous .... surely "best" is not the way to decribe these results. "Most popular" would be more like it."

I have to say I totally agree. Or maybe be even more specific - "most popular among the Brits".

The piece continues, dissecting the best food, best service and best accommodation categories, and finally concluding that the whole thing is a publicity exercise for Cruise.co.uk.

Surprise surprise.

But it succeeded. Even the Telegraph and Travel Weekly (not written by me!) ran with the story. And let's face it, so did Mark Tre, whoever he might be!

I did the Chef's Table for the first on Ruby Princess this August; now I've been lucky enough to do it again, this time on Royal Princess.

It's a special dining option offered by Princess Cruises where you have appetizers in the galley in the company of the executive chef and then another four courses in the dining room. All accompanied by plenty of bubbly, wine and port. And all that for $75 per person.

On Ruby we had to don white jackets to enter the galley. There was none of that this time, although I did receive an extraordinary list of rules and regulations along with the invitation to the Chef's Table. I would have to watch a demonstration of "correct hand washing procedures" and my clothes must be freshly laundered (would they need the tickets?).

It also stated no open-toed shoes were allowed, but apparently that applies only to men. I'm still trying to work that one out.

In the galley we were greeted with these bread rolls with our names on and after the bubbly was poured the feast began. A very tasty avacado and mango cocktail speciially made for me (the others had crab in theirs), and even better foie gras on brioche.

Appetizers over, we were escorted to the Sterling Steakhouse, for the rest of the meal - another four courses and a sorbet - and entertained by the chef's attempts to set fire to himself as he flambed the meat table-side.

And of course we had to have a photographer on hand to record the evening. This is me with chef Gaetano Patamia and maitre d' Francisco Patricio. My thanks to them both for making sure we all had a great evening (and for remembering my fussy diet!).

About two minutes after embarking Royal Princess in Sochi, Russia, last week I got a real sense I had been here before.

I had, of course, not only because I had sailed on the ship when it was Swan Hellenic's Minerva II, but also because just three days before, I had been on Oceania's Regatta in Dover, one of seven sisters built for the now defunct Renaissance Cruises (before becoming Minerva II, Royal bore the unlovely name of R8).

It's amazing how little they have changed on Royal Princess since its Minerva days. Inevitably what changes there have been have taken it from being a one-off British niche discovery-type cruise ship to a American vessel that has to appeal to our friends over the Pond.

So where there used to be a collection of novels by the bar on deck five there is now a photo gallery. At dinner and as you disembark at each port, happy snappers are there to capture the moment.

I forget what the bar itself was called, but it has been renamed the Casino Bar, which gives a hint as to what has been installed there. And what were all those pictures I saw stacked up in the Royal Lounge? The dreaded art auction has found its way on board.

When I was on Minerva II, I got chatting to a lovely couple who were telling me why they liked Swan. "Do you know, they have bingo on P&O," the last word said in a whisper so no one else might hear and be offended. What would he think of art auctions!

The really big change, and the one I don't understand, is that open dining has gone and dinner is now served in two sittings. If Swan could operate an open dining system, and Oceania can do it on Royal's sister ships, why can't Princess?

On Swan, rather than being able to pick who you dined with you just turned up when you wanted to eat and joined the next available table (although of course friends and family could turn up together and therefore sit with each other). It worked a treat as you had different dining companions each night.

Incidentally, it's still the way they do things on Swan Hellenic and Spirit on Adventure, which speaks volumes in my book.

Minerva II had two additional restaurants on deck 10, which were free but I seem to remember you needed to book as they were very popular. These have become Princess' trademark speciality restaurants - a Sterling Steakhouse on one side and Sabatini's on the other.

They are open alternate evenings, which seems to make sense when you are on a ship with just 700 passengers, and cost an additional $15 and £20 per person respectively.

I ate in the steakhouse and have to say the food was fabulous and cooked to perfection. I'm not a great fan of the way they present you with the uncooked lumps of meat at the start of the meal to help you make up your mind what to order, but here's Alexandru from Romania doing his stuff anyway.

Princess is also offering the Chef's Table dinner that I have already told you about and balcony dining - either a Champagne breakfast ($28 per couple) or a Lobster dinner ($100 per couple).

It is also installed its trademark Lotus Spa - I treated myself to a fabulous 50 minutes of reflexology - and there is now wi-fi throughout the ship, which might not impress too many people but for which I was eternally grateful.

The country-house hotel-style library is unchanged (but different books as all the Swan ones are now on Minerva). A couple of elderly gents were in there while I was nosing around, discussing how much they liked this little hideaway and I can see why. It is a lovely quiet area.

The top deck looked largely unchanged - sadly with no teak deck or loungers as you get on Oceania, but then there were none before either.

And I was so disappointed there were none of the double sun loungers I spotted on Regatta - especially as we had such unexpectedly glorious sunbathing weather each day as we cruised around the Black Sea.

Wonder if it's still an Indian summer if you are in the Ukraine?

P&O Cruises has announced the dates when its three Michelin-starred celebrity chefs, who between them have six restaurants on six ships, will be taking to the high seas.

As well as keeping an eye on the restaurants that bear their names, they will be entertaining passengers with cooking demonstrations, book signings and Q&A sessions.

The celebrity threesome includes Gary Rhodes, who has fabulous restaurants (I know because I've tried them) on Arcadia and Oriana, and who will be on four cruises, and Marco Pierre White, who has a restaurant on Ventura (I've tried that one too) and whose dishes are served in Oceana's Café Jardin's and Aurora's Café Bordeaux.

White seems to have caught the cruising bug and will be on six cruises.

Last but not least there's Atul Kochhar, who will have the first Indian restaurant at sea. I've not tried that yet as it's on Azura, which doesn't launch until next April but if it's anything like his restaurant in London, Benares, it'll be a winner.

Kochhar is on five cruises, so another one who just can't keep away (but one date is in 2011)!

Want to sail with a celebrity? Here are the dates they'll be on (subject to change). For more information see your local cruise travel agent or go to the P&O website

Gary Rhodes' cruise dates

* Arcadia: 15-night cruise to Norwegian fjords departing June 19 2010.

* Arcadia: 13-night Mediterranean cruise departing November 2 2010.

* Oriana: 12-night cruise tothe Baltic departing July 11 2010.

* Oriana: 7-night cruise to Iberia departing August 27 2010.

Marco Pierre White's cruise dates

* Aurora: 12-night cruise to the Canary Islands departing April 19 2010.

* Oceana: 14-night Mediterranean cruise departing May 15 2010.

* Ventura: 7-night Iberia cruise departing June 5 2010.

* Ventura: 14-night Mediterranean cruise departing July 3 2010.

* Oceana: 14-night Mediterranean cruise departing October 2 2010.

* Ventura: 14-night Caribbean cruise departing October 22 2010.

Atul Kochhar's cruise dates

* Azura: 16-night Mediterranean cruise departing April 12 2010.

* Azura: 16-night Eastern Mediterranean cruise departing July 23 2010.

* Azura: 12-night Canary Islands cruise departing August 8 2010.

* Azura 7-night Iberia cruise departing September 21 2010.

* Azura: 15-fly night Caribbean cruise departing February 4 2011.

It's been an exciting few days for Royal Caribbean as the cruise line finally took delivery of Oasis of the Seas and the 220,000-ton mega-ship set sail for its new home in Fort Lauderdale in Florida.

The ship has been six years in the making and during that time has managed to stir up plenty of mixed emotions - "too big", "too many people", "ugly", "can't wait", just plain "wow".

Whichever category you fit in, and of course it won't suit everyone, you have to admit Royal has come up with something truly spectacular.

The Central Park with real shrubs, a zipwire, inside balcony cabins, a bar that thinks it's a lift, an AquaTheatre, hundreds of places to eat - well OK, 20, but it's still a huge number. And then there's the FlowRider and rock-climbing wall that are already on other ships, but Oasis has two of each, and also an ice-rink.

I'm lucky enough to be going to be cruising on Oasis in November, just before the naming ceremony on November 30, and am already feeling exhausted just thinking of having to get around to see all these things.

But that's a while yet. More immediately, it seems Oasis will be making a technical stop at in Southampton on Monday at about 12.30pm to off-load people not needed for the transatlantic crossing.

I remember Richard Fain, Royal Caribbean Cruises chairman and chief executive officer, saying a while back that this was on the cards and that no, I would not be able to go on board to have a look. Well it was worth a try! But anyone in the area at the ETA specified should be able to see the ship, even if it is not docking. 

If that fails, there is still room on the inaugural seven-night Eastern Caribbean sailing - and therefore I'm guessing on most departures thereafter - for anyone who wants to make history and be among the first to cruise on the largest cruise ship in the world.

Your local travel agent will be able to help or click here to book on line.

You didn't have to be a cruise ship expert to spot Disney Cruise Line's Disney Wonder in Port Canaveral last Sunday as only one of the vessels in that day had red funnels with white ears. And played "When you wish upon a star" as it left port, although of course the idea was that you were on by then!

The ears set the scene well for what was to come on my four-day cruise around the Bahamas. Mickey, Mickey and, more Mickey, with just a little Goofy, Minnie, Donald and co thrown in.

The vessel itself, which is more sleek liner than modern-day cruise ship, is an interesting mix of Disney meets art deco. I rather like it, but it does look a bit dated at times, especially, I imagine, to a younger generation.

The ship launched in 1999, so it is 10 years old and it is showing its age in places. There are big heavy doors out onto the deck, which I've noticed a lot of children struggling with, and from the self-service to the open deck at the back of the ship. There are actually buttons to press to open those doors, but no one, myself included, noticed it so again there were kids and parents with trays struggling to open a heavy door.

The dining system is unusual. It's the traditional two sittings where you are allocated a table number, waiter and time to dine - either 5.45pm, which is unbelievably early, and another at 8.15pm - but you eat in three different dining rooms, taking your waiter with you as you go.

Ilana and I started in the Animator's Palete,  which starts with black-and-white décor and ends up in colour (and the waiters switch from a black-and-white waistcoat to a colour one), then moved on to Parrot Cay, which is self-service by day and waiter service by night.

Last stop on the fixed dining circuit was Triton's (if you are cruising for a week you just repeat the sequence), and I also managed one night in Palo, the adult-only Italian speciality restaurant. The food and service were very good and all for an extra $15 per person, which was excellent value.

They also do a Champagne brunch in Palo on sea days, again for adults only, again for $15 per person, and again excellent value considering the mountain of great food on offer. It was just a shame Ilana couldn't come as well.

The number of adult-only areas of the ship is surprising given this is a family ship. There's Quiet Cove, which is the adult pool area (where ironically a singer who really should have "Let it be" was belting out a Beatles' song the first time I went there so it was anything but quiet), and also the Cove Café attached to the pool.

A new observation lounge just added to the ship for when it goes to Alaska has been deemed adult-only - which makes me wonder where the kids are going to go when it rains or to get away from the cold - and downstairs, the Route 66 bars are closed to under 18s after 9pm.

There is also a sign at the entrance to the Vista Spa announcing you have to be aged over 18 to go inside, but they do have some teen treatments. Ilana had a manicure and pedicure and a friend had a facial.

I treated myself to a very relaxing massage courtesy of Karen from Ireland and am delighted to report there was no hard sell at the end so I left feeling as relaxed as I was while she was doing her stuff. I should add that I later found out that I had escaped lighty. Clearly Elemis does not change its selling spots.

The kids have two pools - the Mickey pool with a small slide for the youngsters and Goofy pool for the bigger kids. And naturally they can also spend their days in the kids' clubs, while teens have Aloft, where no parents are allowed, to hang out in.

Entertainment is naturally all Disney-based and very schmaltzy, but also extremely impressive, with clever use of moving backdrops and curtains to make it look as if the live action on the stage is part of what is happening behind.

Away from the shows, there are films in the theatre and non-stop on the TV, but the main attraction seemed to be the character appearances. Whether it's Mickey, Donald or one of the princesses, mums had their kids in line - and some of those lines are very long - cameras and autograph books in hand.

Judging by some of the kids' faces, I think many would have preferred to be out in the sun playing on the Mickey slide. They just didn't dare to let on!

Unfortunately, Carnival Dream has been more of a nightmare since we left New York yesterday as the sea is rough, the wind is well, windy, it's grey outside and generally very unpleasant.

Even more unfortunate is the fact that the filthy weather means they can't open the waterslides so I have not been able to have a go on them. There's the 303ft-long Twister, the DrainPipe, which they describe as a giant funnel attached to a 104ft spiral slide and an 80ft racing slide.Luckily, I managed to have a good look around the ship while we were tied up in New York and it was still possible to walk in a straight line. I'm pleased to report that my first impressions were correct - the interior design is a lot less outlandish than on previous Carnival ships.

That's deliberate, according to Joe Farcus, the interior architect who has designed Carnival's ships for more than 30 years, who says he is trying to raise the image of the ships. So out go the mermaids and Medusa heads, and in come muted, calmer designs.

Well almost. Farcus decided to have a little "concept design" fling in the Burgundy Lounge, which is all based on carnival in Venice with masks on the walls and ceilings. This is the room that has the Dr Who-style giant red spiders.

While I might not want his designs in my house, I admire his imagination and have always been amazed at the attention to detail he gives to everything he creates. Whether outlandish or muted, that hasn't changed.

There are several really nice features on this ship. The kids' and teens areas are huge - I even caught myself saying "wow" as I went inside Club O2, for the 15-17s, as it is enormous - and they have made clever use of the atrium, with a stage above the bar.

The Serenity adults-only area, above the spa and split over two decks, will be good when they are cruising the Caribbean from Port Canaveral in the sunshine. I especially like these big whicker hooded chairs - remarkably similar to the ones on the Celebrity Solstice-class ships!

There's also a great new so-called inside/outside Ocean Plaza entertainment area on deck five, which houses the main public areas of the ship.

What makes this area different is that instead of being a corridor with net-curtained windows so you can't see out, as you get on the equivalent deck on other ships, one section on Dream has floor-to-ceiling glass windows and doors leading from the inside to, yes, you've guessed it, the outside.

More specifically out to the Promenade deck, where there are "scenic" whirlpools. At least I'm told they are scenic; in this weather I am happy to take their word for it.

The Ocean Plaza itself has a coffee bar, a stage for a live band, a dance floor and a bar, a combination of features that seems to make it work well as a venue in the daytime and in the evenings as well.

One of my favourite areas is The Gathering, a strange name for the self-service restaurant. It's awful at breakfast, because all the food is in a line so you have to queue past the milk, yogurt, fruit, cereals and so on before getting to the hot stuff. Fine if you want it all, tedious if, like me, you just want a bit of bacon or a bread roll.

However, come lunchtime, this place transforms into my idea of heaven, with different stations serving different food from around the world. There's a Mongolian wok area - I filled a bowl with vegetables, took it to Joseph and he stir-fried it all up with meat and sauce of my choice. It was hot, fresh and tasty. Just perfect.

There is also an outdoor tandoori and a new Pasta Bar, in its own area above the rest of the self-service. As I can't decide which to have today, I'm planning to try them both. Not great for the diet I know, but so far I haven't been very impressed with dinner so I'm making up for that. Or at least that's my story.

Up one more deck from the Pasta Bar is the Chef's Art steakhouse, the speciality restaurant. It's very elegant and from past experience on a Carnival ship the food will be good, but we've not had a chance to eat there because this is a revenue cruise to nowhere and they want passengers to have first pick of the tables as they are paying $30 per person supplement.

Every recession has a silver lining, it seems, For Yachts of Seabourn and Silversea, it's that the hefty discounts they have been offering has tempted a new, younger crowd to come cruise with them.

Pam Conover, Seabourn's CEO, says the average age on new ship Seabourn Odyssey, which launched in June this year, was 45 years compared to 55 years for the line overall, while the ratio of first-time guests was two-thirds higher than the cruise line's norm. New cruisers, younger people. It's what all the cruise lines want.

During World Travel Market this month, I chaired a cruise session and a similar message came out. To paraphrase: "yes, we're discounting, but those discounts are encouraging new people to cruise with us and once they start, they won't stop".

Is that wishful thinking? I don't think so. All the cruise lines have repeat factors that other travel companies would die for simply because once people take their first voyage, they are hooked. It's getting them the first time that is the challenge.

Lots has changed in cruising to do just that - the more relaxed dress codes, the introduction of open dining so passengers can dine when they want, the existence of speciality restaurants so people have a choice of where to eat, and so on.

Next thing to tackle, MSC Cruises' UK chairman Peter Pate told the packed audience at WTM, is the entertainment. How I agree. Fluff-and-feathers dance troupes singing songs from the shows have so had their day. Bring on - who was it you said Peter? - oh yes, Elton John. Now that would be a sell-out cruise and no one would have to discount.

Which top performer would you like to see on a cruise? Why not drop me a line. Who knows, you could influence the future of cruise ship entertainment!

I admit it. I was one of the many Oasis of the Seas' refusniks, wowed by the thought of the ship and all the things on it but convinced that Royal Caribbean International's new mega-ship would be just too big.

It took a couple of hours on the vessel, which weighs an incredible 225,000 tons and holds just over 6,000 passengers, for me to change my mind.

Specifically it was the moment I saw Central Park for the first time. I love the way it has been laid out with the real trees and shrubs, but the important thing is the way it is an "area", enclosed, it's own little bit of the ship.

Then at the aft, there is the Boardwalk, bigger than the Park - or does it just seem that way because it's not broken up with the greenery and opens out onto the sea? - and another "area" (what Royal Caribbean calls neighbourhoods).

It's a cliché, I know, but the design of Oasis means you rarely feel you are on a big ship. Even on the top deck, there are enough areas - the sports deck, the pools and aquapark - to break up the long view from front to back.

But what the eye doesn't see, the feet certainly feel. Mine had no doubt how big Oasis was after a day exploring, walking front to back a few times. Handy hint: Be sure to pack comfortable shoes for the daytime if you're planning to book a cruise on this ship.

Happily, I quickly discovered the Solarium Bistro at the front of Oasis, not far from my cabin. It's a self-service restaurant and has saved me the long trek to the Windjammer buffet at the back for breakfast and lunch. There's not such a big selection of food, but plenty nonetheless and it's wonderfully peaceful.

Windjammer is actually very well laid out with lots of food stations which should help to cut queues, and the food I had there one lunchtime was very tasty.

If that doesn't appeal, there's a Johnny Rockets' fast-food joint, just like the one on other Royal Caribbean ships, the Seafood Shack, which has always been busy but I've avoided as I don't eat either fish or seafood, a café on Central Park, a pizza parlour and lots of other places to eat and snack.

One thing I don't much like are the inside balcony cabins. They are an amazing idea and they look great from the outside, but how odd is it to go on a cruise and not have a view of the sea (and yes, I know it's the same for an ordinary inside cabin, and I think that's odd too)?

True, it does get very boring watching waves go by, but there's nothing to beat the excitement of being out on the balcony early morning as you sail into port or that Champagne moment, again on your own balcony, watching as a country fades into the distance as you head off in the evening for somewhere new.

Oasis is so smooth that I reckon passengers in those inside balcony cabins will never even know when they are at sea or docked. Maybe that's the idea? It's a cruise for people who don't do cruises. Oh hang on. Someone else has got there first with that slogan!

Personally I also don't like the idea of people in the cabins opposite mine being able to look across at me and I've noticed the ones overlooking the Boardwalk are very noisy. But although they don't appeal to me, others seem to love them as these cabins are commanding a premium over their sea-view equivalents. But then that's what this ship is about - something for everyone. Clearly it works.

One thing Royal has done very well on Oasis is the signposting. It might be a big ship, but it's very hard to get lost, especially as they have new touch-screen panels which not only show you where the venue you want is, but also also how to get there.

More and faster lifts - there are only fore and aft lifts, none mid-ships - would be nice, but speedy lifts have never been a Royal Caribbean strong point.

On their other ships, the queues at the lifts have been bad on port days and at disembarkation. On Oasis I imagine they could be horrendous as 6,000 people try to get off at once. Maybe that will be the cue for more cruisers to discover those things called stairs!

I did promise to let you have some thoughts about Costa Europa, the ship destined to become Thomson Dream next April, from my visit a couple of weeks ago.

It was quite fleeting but long enough for me to realise that I had forgotten most of the ship from when I last saw it - well it was 2002, when it was being handed over from Holland America Line to Costa Cruises.

In fact only the Medusa lounge, a nice big room with raised seating either side, rang any bells when I did my whirlwind tour. Yet there were other good features I should have remembered, such as the comfy sofas in the theatre and the retractable roof on the swimming pool, which will be a great addition to the Thomson fleet.

The decor is smart but not at all garish and I liked the spacious feel of the ship, which Thomson's director of cruise David Selby promised me they won't change.

There are also some very strange things about Costa Europa, not least the fact that most of the cabins were below the reception desk on deck eight, there is no atrium at all, not even an attempt at one, as was usual on older ships, and the gym was in the mid-ships on deck 10, separated from the spa back down on deck eight. Not quite Poseiden, I know, but it did feel very upside down to me.

Thomson is not planning to do much to the ship when it first takes delivery - changing a few names and putting a smiley face on the funnel are immediate priorities - oh and putting a new menu in the speciality restaurant.

The restaurant served the strangest collection of dishes I've ever seen and certainly would not appeal to your average British Thomson passenger

There was "egg cooked at 65 degrees" (which turned out to mean it was cold and raw), snails that really looked like snails for a main course and a pasta dish with brocolli "stuff". Actually the pasta was quite nice but certainly contained no brocolli so I never found out what "stuff" was. A strange Italian translation - but of what? - or had the broccoli man just failed to deliver that day?

Sorry Costa, but whatever Thomson decides to serve up, it can't help but be better.

In November 2010, Thomson is putting the ship into drydock for six weeks, by which time I reckon they will have found a few other things to sort out and spruce up.

The fun thing will be to go back on board afterwards and see I can spot the difference. As a hint, David, the first place I will look is my bathtub...

Last time I cruised with Silversea, in March 2009, there were five themed menus to choose from in the cruise line's super fine dining restaurant Le Champagne. a Relais & Chateaux collaboration and the nearest thing to a Michelin-starred restaurant at sea, according to executive chef Rudi Scholdis.

On new ship Silver Spirit there are 11 themed menus, with foie gras and Champagne, game, cavier and truffles among the new ones, adding to the previous selection of Burgundy, Bordeaux, Italian, North American and Spanish.

In May, I had the Burgundy one and the food was superb, but I reckon Julie Le Gallic, the chef in Le Champagne on Silver Spirit, went even better.

We had the foie gras et Champagne menu, which really was foie gras with everything - a foie gras terrine to start, white bean soup with foie gras, and then steak topped with foie gras. I wondered if the "surprise" in the dessert would be that there was foie gras inside, but alas there was not.

Or given it was a very minty dish maybe that was a good thing!

It reminded me of a restaurant I took my family to in France once which we called "Death by duck" as everything was indeed some part of a duck. In fact they even gave us a bill at the end (sorry couldn't resist that)!

I know a lot of people have an issue with foie gras, but with 10 other menus to choose from it's easy to avoid if you do have a problem with it. As I can't eat fish or seafood, it was a fantastic menu for me. I didn't have to ask if chef could prepare something different, which I hate doing, and the food was delicious to boot.

In fact my only complaint was that the soup was too rich. In my humble opinion, more bean and less foie gras would not go amiss. Several of us just couldn't finish it.

As ours was the $200 per person degustation menu, each course was served with a different wine - or in this case Champagne.

Usually maitre d'-cum-sommelier Marcello Belelli will explain where the wines come from, their finer qualities and why they have been selected for that particular course but not this time as we didn't have quite the right Champagne (it was due to be loaded in Barcelona, after we had disembarked).

However, he did tell us of a couple booked on Silver Spirit for five months who have reserved a table in Le Champagne every night. And of a past passenger who always dines in Le Champagne, asks for a hot dog and buys a $900 bottle of wine to go with it.

"Can he go off menu like that," I wondered. For $900 a bottle he can do whatever he likes, Marcello replied.

One of the big differences between Silversea's new ship Silver Spirit and the other vessels in the fleet are the number of places to dine.

There's the main dining room, of course, for waiter-service breakfast, lunch and open-seating dinner, and La Terrazza, which is a buffet at breakfast and lunch time, and a fine Italian restaurant in the evening. You do need to make reservations for this, but there is no charge.

There is also Le Champagne, pictured below, where they have themed menus - French, Italian, American, and so on.

You can opt to pay $30 per person just for the food (but you have to buy your wine from the wine list whereas in other venues on Silversea all drinks except the premium brands are complimentary) or choose the $200 per person degustation menu. In this case, the food is paired with specially-selected wines.

So far no changes, as these three outlets are on the other ships (although there are more themed menus in Le Champagne, of which more later), but Silver Spirit has another three dining outlets.

There's the Stars Supper Club, which is a food-cum-entertainment venue open from 9pm where you can order bite-size portions of paired dishes (five to choose from including black pudding, frog's legs and scallop or lobster, swordfish and monkfish) while enjoying the live singing. The idea is you dine somewhere else and then come here later to snack.

Seishin, pictured at the top of this post, is also new and is an Asian speciality restaurant - the name is Japanese for Spirit - all about fish. So there's sushi, sashami, scallops, spider crab, seafood tempura and more. Basically 11 courses of anything that comes from the sea and starts with an "s".

I am joking of course. There is no "s" in wagyu beef, the one non-fish course. Oh, sorry yes there is. It's "signature" wagyu beef.

The restaurant looks super and I understand meal times are all very theatrical, with the sushi and sashami prepared at the chef's table in the centre of the room. I suspect the food is excellent too - as long as you like fish, of course.

Stars is free, but Seishin has a $40 per person cover charge. For another $40 per person you can try seven different sakis with the meal. Pay $200 per person and you get a wine-pairing experience.

Last but not least there is new al-fresco casual dining by the pool. It's beef and chops, that sort of thing, which are seared in the galley and then served on hot stones, on which the meat is "finished" at the table by the passengers.

It's definitely an eating option with my name on - and I gather it has been rolled out to Silversea's other ships - but sadly it was so wet and cold when I was on this week we never go to see it in action. It was so miserable, in fact, that even the pool bar stayed closed for the duration of the cruise. The joys of cruising the Med in winter!

Executive chef Rudi Scholdis said he will also be serving a spa breakfast at the pool grill and spa food will be available in the outside deck area of the thermal suite.

It's a lovely area, with heated mosaic loungers, a steam room and sauna inside and sunloungers and a plunge pool outside, but as the thermal suite is small (there are only four mosaic loungers) and costs extra ($25 for a day pass, $99 for a weekly one), I'm not sure that many people will there to tuck into the food. 

Most of us mark 20th anniversaries with a party for family and friends, maybe a special holiday if we're feeling flush.

Crystal Cruises does it by creating its own Champagne and wine. This year, Crystal cruisers will be able to sample the line's new Billecart-Salmon Champagne and a new Pinot Noir for 2010, the latter created from grapes grown at the "C" Vineyard in California's Santa Lucia Highlands where other Crystal wines come from.

I've been told the Pinot Noir for 2010 boasts flavours of strawberries and red cherries with earthy herbal undertones and spicy aromas from French oak barrels but not the price.

I'm guessing that's because it's rather expensive (have you noticed how companies always tell you prices if they are deemed "value" but not if they they are likely to caused a giant "gulp"?), but don't worry. The $2,000 per couple on-board credit Crystal is giving away on cruises this year should help to cover it.

I'm probably not the only person who really only associates Cambodia with the Khmer Rouge, Pol Pot and the Killing Fields.

It was a very important time in the country's history, and of course we should all know about it, but I was amazed - and just a little humbled - when we visited yesterday on Spirit of Adventure to discover his regime lasted just four years, from 1975 to 1979.

That means Cambodia had an awful lot of history both before and after that I knew nothing about. After attending a very interesting lecture about Thailand given by former British ambassador Sir James Hodge en route to Vietnam, it seems quite a bit of it was spent invading their Thai neighbours. But that was a long time ago.

Cambodia is one of the poorest countries in the world, at peace only since 1998, because once Pol Pot had gone it was still ruled by Communist dictators and in the grip of civil war.

My initial plan on seeing it on the itinerary for this cruise was to do the excursion to Phnom Penh, the capital. But that's before I saw it was a four-hour drive each way - eight hours on the road - and you had just four hours there.

It would have been fascinating to visit, and very soboring to see the Tuol Sleng Genocide Museum, where the Khmer Rouge tortured and killed thousands of people, but I also noticed that if I did the local sightseeing tour in Sihanoukville, the port town where we were tied up, I would also be able to join the Evening in Cambodia excursion and get a taste of local food. Decision made.

Incidentally, the few people I've spoken to who did do the 12-hour trip to the capital said it was a very long day but was well worth going.

There isn't much to see per se in Sihanoukville, but it was fascinating to get a feel for the local culture and hear Bora, our guide, talk about his country. Actually it was also quite a challenge to listen to him as his English was poor, but he was quite charming - so cheerful and so keen to try to give us an understanding about his country.

It would have been so easy to go for the sympathy vote by dwelling on those terrible Pol Pot times, but he didn't. He talked about them in the same even tones that he talked about the French times, the civil war, the communists. It was his history and now they are rebuilding. He told us about that too. He was visibly so pleased that we had come to see his country.

First stop, the Ngean Pagoda, we picked up our first batch of young children, this lot just intrigued to see the things we were carrying (in my case my pen and notebook) but by the time we visited Tumnub Rolok fishing village they had become more demanding.

One woman made the mistake of handing out either some money or pens to a couple of the kids and rapidly became a modern-day Pied Piper.

In between the pagoda and fishing village, we had time at the local market - a fascinating, noisy, busy, grubby place selling clothes, souvenirs and the most scary-looking fishy things and sticky desserts, made all the more yucky because when a buyer came along, they were spooned into little plastic bags and handed over. They really did not look at all appetising.

I'll post some pictures, either when I feel strong enough to take on the steam-driven computers on Spirit of Adventure or when I get home.

The market made me realise that evening's local dinner might be a bit of a problem for me as I don't eat fish or seafood, so back at the ship I tucked into extra lunch. A good thing too!

Dinner was a buffet with fish soup, a shrimp salad, squid spring rolls and pasta with a fish sauce on the menu (there was also beef bourgignon but after the woman next to me pronounced it was a good thing she had her own teeth to chew it, I decided to give it a miss).

Luckily, on a cruise ship you're never going to starve so I just sat back and enjoyed the rest of evening. The Sokha Resort where we were dining had set out tables on the beach, we had lovely smiley waiters who could not do enough to help (some of the more elderly passengers found walking in the sand quite hard) and were treated to a performance by a local dance troupe. Apparently all were orphans who are picked early and go to a special dance school, which gives them special privileges.

Back on board, the ropes were cast and we set off. A day at sea and next stop Ho Chi Minh City in Vietnam, where we are staying for a day and a half. I'll see you there.

Last time I visited Bangkok I arrived on P&O Cruises' Aurora and we docked at Laem Chebang, from where it was a two-hour drive to the city (apparently we were lucky - it can take up to three hours if the traffic is bad).

However, Spirit of Adventure is a much smaller ship so it was able to sail up the Chao Praya river and park close to the city. I joined it straight from the airport on Wednesday and we stayed docked overnight so there was some time for sightseeing on Thursday.

Spirit of Adventure includes at least one excursion per port in the cruise price, which is very civilised. For Bangkok, there were two, one to the Temple of the Golden Buddha, the other to the Temple of the Reclining Buddha. Most of us chose the latter, which proved a good move.

The drive to the temple took us through the city's Indian town, past the flower market, where the pavements are packed stalls selling mainly yellow flowers - it's the colour of Buddha and of gold - and also through the very colourful Chinatown - all the more colourful as the streets are dressed up with red lanterns for the Chinese New Year on February 14.

"This is a very big area for buying gold," Oh, our guide, said (OK, it's a nickname but at least it's easy to spell).

I was more interested in the food stalls and shops, and really wished we could get out and wander for a while. But the big Buddha was waiting. And boy, was he big. Really stunning. We had time to walk around him and see the ladies dropping coins in the buckets along one side of the temple for good luck.

They are supposed to put a coin in each, but I noticed they were being selective, no doubt to save on the pennies. I guess that means the good luck will be selective as well!

"There are three seasons in Thailand - hot, hotter and hottest - and you are lucky because you have come during hot," Oh told us back on the coach. One man had collapsed while we were in the Ordination Hall, another attraction in the Temple of the Reclining Buddha, overcome with the heat, I suspect, and others were starting to moan and groan. I do wonder what they expected the weather to be like in Thailand.

Next stop was the Marble Temple, which was beautiful but disappointing after the grandeur Reclining Buddha, and then on to the inevitable shopping stop.

Oh did her best to dress it up by explaining how the government had encouraged local crafts during a previous economic downturn and at this stop we would see local jewellery being made, but at the end of the day it was just a shopping opportunity with highly-priced goods and Rottweiler sales staff.

"I was just going to walk through but I ended up buying a ring," one woman told me later. She was not the only one who had been "grabbed". Happily they completely ignored me as I walked through, realised the prices were way out of my league and went to watch the parking attendants trying to manage the coaches and mini buses coming in and out bringing hordes of unwitting tourists, which was a lot more fun (and shows how boring the shop was).

At 4pm that day, Spirit of Adventure's ropes were cast and we set sail down river for our next stop, Ko Kood, an island on the way to Cambodia. It's just a beach stop so a day off from the intellectual stuff, but that all starts again tomorrow when we visit Sihanoukville.

I'll see you there.

Meatballs without spaghetti and popcorn fish and chips are just two of the dishes that will be on the menu in a new restaurant on Celebrity Eclipse when it launches in Southampton in April.

Called Qsine, it has been created by chef Jacques van Standen, who is also Celebrity's vice-president of culinary operations.

Van Standen took time out on Wednesday to unveil details of the new diner, which will replace the Silk Harvest Asian fusian restaurant on sister ships Solstice and Equinox.

Basically this new one is all about serving up a new take on old favs such as the meatballs, which will be served alone on stylish platters and you'll only get three - one kobe beef, one veal masala and one turkey in cranberry and sage gravy.

There are spring rolls served in springs, a soup and souffle dish, sushi lollipops, Chinese food served in Martini glasses and popcorn fish and chips. Of course.

There are no appetisers or main courses, you just five in and order what you want from the waiters, who will be called "chefs" and guide you through what's on offer on the menu, which will somehow be illuminated.

They've obviously had a lot of fun with the menus. The dessert one is a magic cube which you have to unfold to find what's on offer. "Some people will think it's weird," Van Standen admitted. Surely not!

He has come up with all sorts of funky phrases to describe the food - palate pleasers, playful, making the ordinary unordinary - but the whole concept is really just a 21st-century take on Spanish tapas, where you order lots of dishes to share.

In fact, the look and style of Qsine reminds me of Restaurant 2 on Seabourn Odyssey, where you also get a taste of each dish. It's a style-over-substantial scenario, but the little taste you got was always very nice.

Actually, what excited me more than the food in Qsine was news that the wine list will be on an Apple iTouch. You tap in what you want (red, white, bubbly, whatever), drill down to get a description of the various wines available in that category, give the order and the wine waiter goes to fetch it.

Van Standen said they hope to have it working by the time of the launch. I hope so too, as I'd like to see that in action.

Has anyone else been following the fois gras fracas that has been playing out on the Cruise.co.uk website?

It all started when P&O Cruises revealed foie gras was included on the menu in Seventeen, the new speciality restaurant on Azura.

Must say, it made up my mind. I'm definitely eating in there if I ever get the chance.

Seems I might be the only one though. And I might have to get through the card-carrying "save the geese and ducks" protesters to get to my table.

The same ones who no doubt eat fish that has been snarred on a hook and cheap battery-farmed chickens from Tesco, and who rush to the dining room for lobster night while proclaiming it's cooked at its best when thrown into boiling water while still alive.

And how funny they don't protest about veal, another favourite on the cruise ship menus.

Actually it's the first glimpse and the last one for a while, because if all goes according to plan, the 446-passenger Saga Pearl II will be off today on its inaugural cruise in its new colours - an 18-night voyage from Southampton to the Norwegian fjords.

I say "if all goes according to plan" because the refurbishment of the ship, which was built in 1981 and formerly called the Astoria, has not gone quite as smoothly as Saga might have hoped.

But I saw it in Southampton yesterday and although there are workmen crawling all over it still, it is looking smart and everyone is confident things will be in place and ship-shape when the first paying passengers come aboard today.

Saga has done a lovely job with the refurbishment, which unusually was carried out in Swansea. Flying the flag for Britain.

OK, they have thrown £20 million at the ship (that's the official figure but I suspect the final cheque will be quite a bit more) to practically rebuild it - much of it has gone on techie bits the passengers will never see like the engines but they have also installed new balcony cabins - so you should get something good.

But it's more the look and feel they have gone for that impressed me.

For one thing, they have opened up the ship so you can see from one side to another, which gives a real feeling of space. For another, the furnishings are bright and modern, not at all how I would have imagined a Saga ship to be (this is the first time I have been on one). The wood floors give it a real yachty feel, as does the colour scheme they have chosen for the cabins.

On the Bridge Deck, outside the Sundowner Bar, there are al fresco soft sofas to lounge around on - very Celebrity I feel - and a modern hi-top table which I could see myself sitting at, glass of wine in hand, watching the sun go down. Well at any other tme as well, actually!

Shackleton's Bar looks very smart and I like the way it is open to the corridor where there is more comfy seating. I just wonder if there is enough seating in the area altogether as it could be a popular place for pre and post-dinner drinks.

The library is next to the bar - there are a staggering 3,400 books - forward is the Discovery Lounge, the main entertainment venue but more suited to concerts than shows as the stage is not very big, aft is the main dining room.

Saga is being very daring on Pearl II and switching from fixed dining to open seating, where passengers turn up to eat when they want, sitting with whom they want. It works a dream on sister brand Spirit of Adventure, so it'll be interesting to see how Saga passengers take to it.

I suspect there'll be talk of rebellion initially, but after a while they'll realise actually it's quite nice to be able to sit with friends - much like when you go out to a restaurant at home, after all - or alternatively that's it's an easy way to meet new people. The real joy is, if you don't like them, you never have to sit with them again.

The only downside is that the dining room is not big enough to hold all 446 passengers at once, so many will have to dine upstairs in the Verandah (the last picture in the sequence above).

That's the self-service by day but it will be waiter service in the evening, serving exactly the same food as in the dining room.

I'd be very happy to eat there as it's a nice airy room but I reckon many passengers will see it as second best, which will lead to an evening stampede for the dining room.

I would not like to be the maitre d'.

What a cool guy Celebrity Cruises president and chief executive Dan Hanrahan is. Not just calm as his new ship Celebrity Eclipse negotiated the obstacle course known as the River Ems, but also totally laid back about the fact Eclipse looks a long way from being finished.

"When I see Bernard Meyer panic, I know it's time to get worried," he told me. "There is a lot to be done but I am confident if they tell me it will be ready on time, it will be ready on time."

Incidentally, Bernard Meyer was on board for the conveyance, and was quite confident that all was going according to plan.

Nonetheless, there are hardboard walkways, plastic sheets and bare rooms all over the ship, which is crawling with workers hammering, drilling and painting.

And this is how the lawn is looking....

It's been too cold in Papenburg to get it laid - and I can certainly testify that it was freezing there last week - so the plan now is to ship the grass from Italy, where it has been grown, to Eemshaven, on the edge of the North Sea, where the ship is now and, fingers crossed, they'll get some warm weather and be able to get it sorted.

Among other changes on the ship, Celebrity Eclipse will have a new speciality restaurant, Qsine, the brainchild of chef Jacques Van Staden, Celebrity's vice-president of culinary operations.

Jacques was on board for the conveyance and enthusing about the fish and chips popcorn and other weird foodie things on the menu. He dubs them "uniquely unordinary". I admit I was just struggling to envisage what it was all about.

To help us out, in the evening of the conveyance they served a few things from the menu in the Oceanview Cafe.

We sampled the popcorn fish, below (turns out it's pieces of battered fish served in a box - only about five or six pieces in each though, as the box is mainly filled with packaging), garlic brioche wrapped in paper cones, Crunchy Munchies, right, which are basically calories in a cardboard cone) and Disco Shrimp, bottom (it's prawn cocktail on a bed of plastic ice that flashes).

It'll cost $30 per person to eat there, which seems steep to me for what is rather ordinary food served in bits of cardboard and paper. Reminded me of McDonald's, but with more packing.

Of course we did only have a taste of things to come, not the whole menu, so rather than have to eat my words I'll stick with saying "seems" and wait to see the reaction of passengers when the ship launches - and don't forget, it'll be mainly Brits on Eclipse initially as the ship is sailing no-fly cruises from Southampton this summer.

TV wine guru Olly Smith, the man behind the Glass House, a wine-tasting-cum-dining experience on P&O Cruises' new ship Azura, will be at the Cruise show at London's Olympia next Saturday, March 27, no doubt bringing his own inimitable style to proceedings.

If you have ever watched BBC One's Saturday Kitchen you'll know what I mean. If you haven't, you need to come along.

Olly is just one of the big attractions at the show, which takes place on Saturday and Sunday next weekend. MSC Cruises is offering free 10-minute massages at its Aurea Spa, Royal Caribbean International is bringing a rock-climbing wall, Fred Olsen will have a golf simulator and the chance for top players to win a mini cruise.

Celebrity Equinox godmother Nina Barough, who founded cancer charity Walk the Walk, will have news of how you can get involved in the SunWalk in Southampton on April 24, when their next new ship, Celebrity Eclipse, is to be named in the city.

All the big names in ocean and river cruising will be there, with many of the cruise lines taking the opportunity to tell you more about their new ships, and there'll also be a chance to get advice and tips from cruise experts including yours truly.

If you are going along to the show, do make sure you come along to the Sky Theatre and say hello.

Tickets cost £10, but it's free for under 16s so why not bring the kids as well and let them help you pick your next holiday? Click here for more details.

Up until yesterday there were 20 dining options on Norwegian Cruise Line's new ship Norwegian Epic, but it seems they have found another, taking the total to 21.

"Who knows how many we'll have by the time the ship launches," quipped Andy Stuart, NCL's executive vice-president global sales and passenger services during a webinar last evening.

The extra restaurant is nothing to do with a late change to the design of the ship, but has appeared because the powers that be at NCL have decided to split Cagney's and the Moderno Churrascarla, which is all about meat, like Cagney's, but Brazilian inspired.

I gather waiters will be coming to the tables brandishing knives and skewers, on which they will spear various types of meat. The name comes from the Portuguese word for barbecue.

Moderno Churrascarla will be one of 10 restaurant on Epic that cost extra, in this case $18 per person. You'll also pay more for the Italian La Cucina ($10pp), Shanghai's ($15pp), the French Le Bistro ($20pp), Cirque Dreams and Dinner ($15pp or $20pp depending on your seating) and the Teppanyaki and Cagney's (both $25pp).

Wasabi (for sushi) and Shanghai's Noodle Bar are both charged a la carte and there is a new pizza delivery service - $5 for a 16-inch pizza delivered anywhere on the ship (but not to another restaurant!).

That leaves 11 places to eat with no charge. As well as the usual self service, grills and room service, there's the Manhattan Room supper club where Legends in Concert will be performing three times a week and Spice H20, an adult-only venue on the aft deck serving Asian and Latin cuisine.

There's O'Sheehans bar and grill, the Studio Lounge that goes with the single cabins, Taste, pictured below, in the atrium where there is also a cafe serving tapas, and the Epic Club or Courtyard Grill for passengers in the villa section of the ship.

It's an impressive selection of places to eat, and you'd be hard pressed to try them all on a seven-night cruise. But would you want to? According to one caller, the paid-for restaurants on a recent cruise were only ever half full.

Seems passengers who only want to eat for free are a problem generally for NCL, as Stuart revealed they are trialling a dining package to encourage more of them to fork out (no pun intended) for the speciality restaurants. If it works, and apparently it is going well, it'll be rolled out across the fleet.

You've seen the stills, now you can watch my video of Celebrity Cruises' new ship Celebrity Eclipse squeezing down the River Ems. The second video is a quick tour of the vessel, although it's not quite finished yet.

Enjoy as this will be your last look until Eclipse arrives in Southampton on April 20.

Celebrity Eclipse ship tour

While on the subject of food and dining, check out this report on Cruise Critic about the new Cirque Dreams and Dinner experience on Norwegian Epic.

I nearly got the chance to go and see this preview in the US a couple of weeks back but in the end all the spaces were taken by American journalists.

Have to say I'm really disappointed now as it looks pretty amazing - even to this old cynic!

I'm sure I can't be the only person rejoicing that Crystal Cruises is to introduce a new flexible dining option for passengers who want the freedom to eat when and with whom they want.

Regular readers of this blog will know I am no fan of the same table, same dining companions system that Crystal currently operates.

When my daughter and I sailed with Crystal last year we ate in the dining room only four times, preferring the freedom of the speciality restaurants. At least there was another option - well two of them actually - and happily Crystal doesn't charge for them either.

But how nice for passengers like us not to feel they have to eat somewhere else.

Crystal's Open Dining by Reservation will be available on both Crystal Serenity and Crystal Symphony from January 2011. Passengers can either make reservations before they cruise - stipulating the number of people and required table size - or on a day-to-day basis. For those who prefer it, fixed two-seating dining will still be available.

Apparently, Open Dining is being introduced in response to feedback from passengers, but there are still some who prefer the old regime (I wonder how long for?). As Crystal's UK sales and marketing director Andy Harmer points out, it's good they are also being catered for.

The change pulls the carpet out from under all those people who have previously argued that Crystal can't be luxury because it tells passengers when they can eat.

And incidentally, the All-inclusive As You Wish promotion, which gives each passenger up to $1,000 to spend on whatever they want on board, also puts the cruise line up there with the other all-inclusive six-star lines because with that much spending money you should never have to pay for a drink.

Play your cards right and you should get a spa treatment or shore excursion for free - or both - as well.

Harmer also revealed "As You Wish" will be available for all cruises in 2011 and next year also Crystal is returning to Alaska after six years, offering nine 12-night cruises from San Francisco on Crystal Symphony.

That's all he's saying for now. As soon as I hear more, I'll let you know.

If you like chocolate, you'll love this seven-night cruise around Italy on Windstar Cruises' 312-passenger sailing ship Wind Surf.

American master chocolatier Fran Bigelow will be on board, talking about how she creates chocolates and conducting tastings.

She will also host a shore excursion to the Gay-Odin Chocolate Factory in Naples, where you'll be taken on a guided tour but more importantly get to sample the stuff.

If you've never heard of Bigelow (and I hadn't) she has apparently been credited for sparking a chocolate renaissance - since when did chocolate need a renaissance? - partly through her cookbook Pure Chocolate.

Just a guess, but I'm thinking you'll be able to buy a copy while on board.

The cruise departs Civitavecchia, the port for Rome, on May 2 and visits Porto Vecchio in Corsica, and Messina, Sorrento, Capri and Ischia, all in Italy, before returning to Civitavecchia. Prices start from £1,640 per person including flights and transfers.

For more information, see your travel agent, call 020 7292 2369 or click here.

It's been one busy weekend for those of us who were at the Cruise show at London's Olympia on Saturday and Sunday.

As soon as the doors opened at 10am on Saturday, the crowds started to flood in. Every time an underground train arrived at Olympia, the scene in the street was like that one from the Disney film Mulan, where the Mongul hordes come over the hill.

And they were coming fast as well - all of them keen cruisers or folk wanting to find out if a cruise was the holiday for them - all desperate to get to the show. You would not have wanted to get in the way.

Before the day had ended, the caterers had run out of sandwiches and so had Tesco over the street, and most of the cruise lines were sending back to the office for fresh supplies of brochures to get them through another day.

Day two started slower - well it was a Sunday just after the clocks had changed - but by midday the venue was packed.

This was the second Cruise show and wow, what a difference from last year. For one thing it was at Olympia, so it was easy to get to. For another, as well as having all the cruise lines there, handing out brochures, giving advice and taking bookings, there was all the fun stuff as well.

Royal Caribbean brought a rock-climbing wall (the kid in my picture below had a real struggle to get up and earned applause when she made it), MSC Cruises had three therapists giving free 10-minute massages, Fred Olsen had a golf challenge.

P&O Cruises brought Olly Smith, who is opening the Glass House on Azura and who kept a packed audience in the new ship theatre enthralled with stories of his love of good wine, food and gastrogasms (yes, really).

Unfortunately I didn't have my camera to hand when Olly was on, but P&O had another wine expert on Sunday and you can see he was lecturing to a full house - not just because of all those glasses of wine surely?

Carnival Cruise Line put on a special version of Loose Woman with Linda Lusardi, SpongeBob Square Pants and Dora the Explorer came along to support Norwegian Cruise Line (they will be on Norwegian Epic when it launches in July) and kept the kids entertained as they wandered around the show.

Not sure how they managed to get around sometimes, mind, as you could barely move for the crowds on Saturday.

And then there were the panel discussions in the Sky Theatre, all of which were well attended. They were hosted by Sky's Claire Smith and featured yours truly among many other cruise journalists and experts from the cruise lines, all of us there to dispense advice about how to choose a cruise, destinations and what to do during those days at sea.

Here are some of the scenes from the show. Look at the stands - they were all packed like this for most of the two days. I just love the moment of serenity on the Yachts of Seabourn one, though, promoting their Champagne in the surf.

Did I say serenity? Don't be fooled. Behind me everyone from the cruise line was busy with customers, several of whom made thousands of pounds worth of bookings over the two days.

The show moves to Birmingham's NEC on October 16-17 and will be back at Olympia next March. Don't forget to make a date.

I promised to bring you more news about what Crystal Cruises is doing in 2011 as soon as I found out, rather expecting to be reeling off details of ports and itineraries for next year.

Instead, there is the much-more-exciting news that in 2011, Crystal is offering free flights with all sailings.

It's great news for lovers of luxury, but possibly not so wonderful for Crystal. As I already reported, they are also continuing their All-Inclusive As You Wish offer, giving couples up to $2,000 to spend on whatever they want - alcohol, spa treatments, excursions, and so on.

What with that, and the free flights, it must be quite painful for the money men.

It's great for consumers though, and has sparked an all-inclusive battle as at the end of last month Regent Seven Seas Cruises launched its 2011 programme, also offering free flights.

On Regent, all drinks - soft and alcoholic - are already included in the cruise price, as are shore excursions.

So which is the most inclusive?

The answer is, it depends. If you go on lots of shore excursions, you'd be better off with Regent, although of course you can use your $1,000 Crystal credit ($2,000 per couple remember) towards whichever shorex you fancy.

However, if you like to be pampered in the spa, Crystal would be better as you can also use the on-board credit in there, whereas on Regent you pay full whack.

As already reported, for 2011 Crystal is bringing in Perfect Choice Dining, allowing passengers to escape the rigid two-sitting fixed dining system if they wish, and the line has also confirmed it is going back to Alaska for the first time since 2005.

It is offering nine 12-night sailings on the 940-passenger Crystal Symphony from San Francisco between May 9 and August 13.

In spring, Symphony will be around South America, the Panama Canal, Mexican Riviera and Hawaii. In autumn, it relocates to east coast US for New England and Canada cruises; in winter it moves to the Caribbean, and back to the Mexican Riviera and Hawaii.

The 1,080-passenger Crystal Serenity, meanwhile, will be in Europe for most of 2011, cruising the Med and Baltic, before relocating to the Caribbean in December.

On Saturday night, I learned - not for the first time - why it's not a good idea to have cruise ship naming ceremonies in the UK. And why, if you have to christen a ship here, it should be done indoors.

As we all shivered as the sun went down on what the forecasters had billed a hot weekend - maybe they were talking about the weather in the Caribbean? - some 1,200 guests, myself included, on P&O Cruises' new ship Azura were treated to a gala ceremony of dance styles through the ages to welcome the new ship, before ballerina Darcey Bussell took to the podium to cut the ribbon and give the vessel its name.

As the bottle smashed, confetti fell and fireworks exploded. P&O announced details of Azura in November 2008. Now, just 17 months on, it has officially become one of the P&O fleet.

This is P&O's "back to the future" ship, which is an attempt to say to past passengers "this is not Ventura" - a sister vessel, but one that was a little rebellious, shall we say.

Actually there are more than a few shades of Ventura in some of Azura's décor, not least the Manhattan lounge and atrium, but generally the latter has a more sober look and feel.

P&O has also been careful to add stuff to appeal to their past passengers who crave cruising as it used to be. So out go fun things like the bungee trampolines and circus school - but there are still extensive kids and teen areas so there will be families in school holidays - and in comes a classical quartet for dancing in the atrium and a library (albeit a very small one).

Actually that's not quite fair as I reckon the Glass House (above), where they sell wine by the glass - but you can have a bottle if you want of course - will be a fun area, especially when wine guru Olly Smith is on to give his inimitable wine tastings.

I guess my favourite area has to be Sindhu, the Indian restaurant - and not just because I love Indian food. It looks and feels the part as well, with subtle background music that takes you back to Mumbai.

Unfortunately the restaurant was closed on naming day so I didn't get to eat there, but I have dined a few times at Benares, Atul Kochhar's restaurant in London, and assuming it's as good, which I'm sure it will be, diners will be in for a treat.

We're talking subtle flavours with lots of spice rather than fiery curries. And all for just £15 per person, excluding drinks, which makes it a bit of a bargain.

Or maybe it was The Retreat, above, the adult-only area up at the front of the ship. I do like the look of those comfy loungers and the thought that you can relax there in peace and quiet.

I also like the look of the menu in Seventeen, below, a P&O fine-dining creation - and the one that caused all that foie gras controversy. I'm would have happily ordered the foie gras had the restaurant been open (this one is £20 per person), but I was disappointed to find it looks so much like the White Room on Ventura, which I found rather sombre.

Now if it had been really white, like the dining room on Celebrity's Solstice-class ships, it would have been spectacular. But maybe that was just too revolutionary, even for Ventura.

Disney Cruise Line has teamed up with French master chef Arnaud Lallement, from two-Michelin-star restaurant l'Assiette Champenoise outside Reims in France, to create Remy, a classy eatery on new ship Disney Dream.

As Disney fans will have noticed, it's named after the star in Ratatouille. Yes, that'll be the rat.

I'm pretty sure there won't be a rat in Remy (no jokes about rats and sinking ships please) but it does sound as if dining there will nonetheless be a very lavish affair.

The restaurant, seating 80 passengers, is in Art Noveau style, tables will be set with Frette linens, Riedel glassware, Christofle silverware and china made exclusively for Remy, and waiters will wear long white aprons, black jackets or burgundy vests and bow ties.

Dining starts with a chilled Champagne cocktail made table-side and moves on through eight or nine courses created by a culinary team overseen by French-trained executive chef Patrick Albert.

There is also a private Chef's Table dining room that seats 16 passengers, who get a different multi-course menu. Apparently the room offers a "glimpse" into the kitchen. Could that be when the chefs come in and out of the room's separate entrance to the galley?

Can't tell you what the menus will be as they are still being created by Lallemen, working with Chef Scott Hunnel from Victoria & Albert's, one of the top restaurants at Walt Disney World Resort in Florida.

Can't tell you what it will cost either, but I don't think this will be one of the cheapest options on the new ship.

The 2,500-passenger Disney Dream (but it can hold 4,000 when all the berths are in use) is being built at the Meyer-Weft shipyard in Germany and due to launch in January 2011. It will will be sailing three and four-night cruises from Port Canaveral in Florida to the Bahamas.

So much happened in the cruising world while Cruise Lines was out of action. Here's a quick catch up of the main stories.

* Holland America Line's 1,260-passenger Statendam set off on its first cruise sporting its new Signature of Excellence features. They include Italian restaurant Canaletto, a lounge called Mix with three bars (martini, Champagne and ales and spirits) and 16 spa staterooms with little extras such as a yoga mat, quality bathrobes and special room service menus.

* Oceania Cruises' Marina, launching in January 2011, is to feature La Reserve, a wine-tasting centre with seating for 24, where passengers can learn about and sample fine wines selected by connoisseurs at Wine Spectator magazine. They'll also be serving seven-course paired food and wine menus here - free food and service but you pay for the wine.

* CruiseDeals, part of TUI UK, has been rolled out to selected Thomson and First Choice agencies to cash in on the growing number of cruise bookers who are migrating back to the high street. They sell all cruise brands.

* Royal Caribbean International's Liberty of the Seas is to offer four and five-night Western Caribbean cruises from Fort Lauderdale, Florida, in winter 2011-12. Jewel of the Seas will also be sailing short cruises, but from Tampa.

* Windstar Cruises will have 10 spa suites on Wind Surf from May 30. The suites will have plush bath robes, a pillow menu, a choice of L'Occitane and O Spa bathroom amenities and fresh fruit delivered daily. There'll be a welcome cocktail party for spa suite passengers and they'll also get two facials, two massages and two manicures or pedicures (or a shave for men). Spa suite prices start from £1,657 per person including flights and transfers.

* Paul Gauguin launched its 2011 programme of cruises in the South Pacific, offering free air fares from Los Angeles. The cruise line's ship, also called Paul Gauguin, will be cruising around Tahiti, French Polynesia, the Cook Islands, the Society Islands, the Marquesas and Tuamotus. Prices start from £2,815 per person for seven nights excluding flights.

* Star Clippers is continuing to steer clear of pirates in winter 2010-11, when all three of its ships will be based in the Caribbean and Central America. Star Flyer will be cruising around Costa Rica, Panama and Nicaragua, Star Clipper will be sailing seven-night from St Maarten. Royal Clipper will be based in Barbados, sailing seven, 10 and 11-night cruises.

* P&O Cruises has appointed a female captain for the first time in its 173 history. Sarah Bretton, 45, has command of the 1,200-passenger Artemis.

And then, of course, there was the volcano ash crisis, when a no-fly zone was imposed across the whole of the UK, leaving thousands of holidaymakers stranded.

Cruise ships came to the rescue, picking up people here and there if they had spare cabins, while Celebrity Cruises and Thomson Cruises mounted massive rescue operations.

Celebrity got 2,200 passengers back from Bilbao on new ship Celebrity Eclipse, Isl Island Escape, part of Thomson, brought stranded passengers home from the Canaries to Falmouth in Cornwall, while Thomson's new Thomson Dream operated two cruises between Palma and Barcelona, rescuing 2,800 holidaymakers, who were then coached to Calais for a ferry journey home.

"It was certainly an experience," Thomson Cruises managing director David Selby told me when I did a quick overnight visit on Thomson Dream's inaugural cruise this week. I'm guessing from the tone of his voice that it's one he won't be in a hurry to repeat.

The last time I was on Celebrity Cruises' new ship Celebrity Eclipse I was sailing backwards down the River Ems and there was an alarming - I thought - lot of work to do to get it finished.

Fast forward six weeks to April 24 and there was the ship, in Southampton, most definitely ready, about to be named and already back from its first sailing - an unscheduled trip to Bilbao in Spain to rescue holidaymakers stranded by the ash.

"If I'd known this £500 million ship would start life as an emergency transporter, I could have saved a lot on the decoration," Richard Fain, chairman and chief executive officer of Royal Caribbean Cruises, quipped during the naming ceremony.

That involved a woman on a wire delivering the ribbon to the stage. It was cut by the godmother, local yachtwoman Emma Pontin, and then threaded its way back through the ship, eventually resulting in the bottle of bubbly smashing against the funnel. Cue confetti.

More seriously, during the ceremony Fain also praised the crew for making sure the rescued holidaymakers had the time of their life during their cruise back to the UK.

He told me that when they decided to do the rescue mission - the decision took about 45 minutes apparently - they never thought of it as a PR exercise. In fact, they were more concerned about upsetting the travel agents and visitors who should have been on the inaugural they had to cancel.

But a PR exercise it became. There's certainly no prizes for guessing which line those holidaymakers will think of if they ever decide to take a cruise.

For an "emergency transporter", Celebrity Eclipse is looking pretty good. It's essentially the same as sisters Celebrity Solstice and Celebrity Equinox, launched in 2008 and 2009 respectively, but nevertheless has it's own feel.

"You can't want to be cool and be cool, but this is the coolest and most sophisticated ship sailing from Southampton," Fain summed it up. He is biased, but I reckon he is also right.

Just look at these pictures of the white dining room, the entrance to the Sky Lounge and the solarium.

There are a couple of structural changes between Eclipse and its sisters, but the big news is what's been added to appeal to the Brits who will be sailing on the ship this summer, while it is homeporting in Southampton.

There are kettles in cabins, steak and kidney pud on the menu (and mushy peas apparently but I didn't see them) and they'll be turning the Sky Observation Lounge into a pub on some nights, with a bigger choice of beers, pub games and quizzes.

The other change is Qsine, a new speciality restaurant, replacing the Asan Silk Harvest. On the conveyance, we were given a taste of Qsine and I admit I wasn't inspired - not so much about the food, which tasted fine, but about the $30 per person cover charge for what was very ordinary grub.

I'm still not 100% sold on it (not even given you can eat as much as you want, which smacks to me of cheap buffets and cold carveries) but the restaurant itself is looking great.

It's one area they definitely wanted to be cool. And have succeeded.

The way the tables are laid is simple but smart and the menus are hugely expensive iPads (they cost $500 each).

Also, there are no boring things like starters, mains or bits in between. You just order as much as you want and dishes are served as soon as they are ready.

Don't they call that fast food?

I was relieved that the one change that Thomson Cruises made as a matter of urgency on the new Thomson Dream, which it started operating last week, was in the speciality restaurant.

The uncooked egg and slimy snails that were served as specialities when I was on the ship when it was Costa Europa last November have gone (I ate neither but I did see the faces of those who did!), replaced by some more palate-friendly items.

In Thomson's speciality Grill (£25pp) I had Peking duck crepes followed by a spicy pasta main dish, and there were also plenty of fishy things as well as beef and chicken. All the food turned up at the table cooked! And mine was very tasty, which was a pleasant surprise.

The ship, which has been chartered from Costa Cruises, had a bit of a nightmare birth into the Thomson Cruises' fleet. There was a fatal accident in Sharm el Sheikh about six weeks before Thomson was due to take delivery, when the ship crashed into a pier and three crew members were killed.

Just as the hole was patched, the volcano ash crisis struck and Thomson Dream was pulled into service to rescue holidaymakers stranded in Palma. It meant any tweaks Thomson had planned to make before it sailed its inaugural cruise as Thomson Dream had to be dropped.

The name was changed, the funnel got a smiley face, some areas have been painted TUI blue and that speciality menu has been changed, but that's it so far. David Selby, Thomson Cruises managing director, is now going to wait and see how the ship, the largest in the Thomson fleet, sailing from Palma this summer, beds down before deciding what other changes to make when it goes into dry dock in October.

Generally the ship is looking nice if a little old-fashioned in places (others call it stylish!), with large public rooms that give the ship a feeling of space. It's one of the ship's big selling points, along with a sliding roof on the main swimming pool that can be closed in bad weather.

You can see more of the ship on my video here.

The Medusa Lounge, which spans the width of the ship, will always be popular as they're going to use it for cabaret acts and games, and I think the Ocean Bar will become a favourite (it was certainly mine) as it's smaller and has a more intimate feel.

The speciality restaurant, once dressed up for the evening, looked very smart, as did the main dining room. It's open dining, which is another great selling point in my book.

Personally I'd get the rather dull-looking signage changed as a matter of urgency, and give the public rooms some sparkling new names at the same time.

And can I put in a word about the shower in my otherwise-lovely suite (very spacious, with a big balcony), which was not really fit for purpose - namely showering (and I'm assuming the showers in the other suites were the same).

Thomson also somehow needs to create a second servery or separate stations in the buffet as the queue was horrendous on the last morning when I went down there, causing tempers to fray.

There's just one counter with everything on it, so even if you only want a bread roll, you have to queue with everyone else picking up bread, yogurts, fruit, fry-ups and so on (and Thomson cruisers want the lot, believe me) unless you are bold enough to barge your way though the line.

Given the disquiet in the ranks as I joined the queue, I decided such a manoever could spark a riot so I decided to wait patiently. Well wait anyway.

Fred Olsen Cruise Lines, the Norwegian line famous as being oh-so-very British, is to start giving its passengers a taste of Norway when its ships are cruising in the fjords.

It's a great idea - I had only just had a meeting with Chris Townson, managing director of Scenic Tours UK, where we both were saying how nice it is when cruise ships serve cuisine from the areas they are cruising in, when Fred's news appeared in my in-box.

As I don't eat anything that comes out of water, I can't get over enthusiastic about the very fishy offerings they will be dishing up - well it is Norwegian cuisine after all - but I can still applaud the thought.

There will be Norwegian starters at dinner such as trout tartar, Aquavit-smoked salmon with mustard sauce, and traditional caviar of capelin and salmon, with warm potato cakes, sour cream and chives, and salmon prepared in 13 different ways over a 13-day cycle.

They are even offering some Norwegian foodie tours - the "Orchard of Norway" excursion from Eidfjord, to see traditional farming, and a "King Crab" day out from Honningsvag to see and taste the local crabs.

As part of Cruise Norway's Taste the Coast promotion, on two seven-night cruises on Braemar, on June 11 and August 12, local celebrity chef Fredrik Hald will be going on Bergen and demonstrating his seafood cookery skills in the Neptune Lounge. Come evening, there'll be a special seafood menu of salmon, scallops, herring and mackerel.

My fishy friends would love it. Excuse me if I give it a miss though.

I'm on my way to Dover today, for a Baltic cruise on Saga Pearl II, the ship that joined the Saga fleet in March.

I know the Baltic well, but this will be my first time cruising through the Kiel Canal, which I am looking forward to. We're also visiting Travemunde in Germany, from where I'm off on a tour to Lubeck - another first for me - and then it's return visits(for me) to Copenhagen, Stockholm, Helsiniki and Tallinn.

We'll also be spending two days in St Petersburg, which I am so looking forward to. It's a fabulous city, so full of history and wonderful buildings.

I am looking forward to visiting my favourite restaurant for a beer and these pasties filled with mushrooms, meat, cheese or cabbage that my daughter and discovered last time. They were so good we went back next day and ordered twice as many!

The internet is going to be a bit sticky - there's no wi-fi on the Pearl - but where possible I'll be posting information about the trip, plus any other bits and pieces I hear on the grapevine. So keep checking in, but please bear with me.

You might have to be the wrong side of 50 to come on a Saga cruise (and because I can tell you are wondering, no I'm not) but that's apparently no excuse to sit around doing nothing all day.

I thought our day at sea on Saga Pearl yesterday, cruising from Copenhagen to Stockholm, was supposed to be a time to relax and gather strength in time for the hectic sightseeing programme that is Stockholm, Helsinki, St Petersburg and Tallinn.

How wrong could I have been?

There were bridge and galley visits, four lectures, a pre-dinner music hall singalong with banjo man Steve Galler, which was very popular, and dancing, a quiz and cabaret after dinner.

Somehow in between all that I managed to squeeze in a relaxing massage with Kerry-Ann in the spa (a rather grand name for two treatment rooms but no matter!) for the bargain price of £65 for 85 minutes, which has to be one of the best deals I've come across in a ship's spa, and join the singles lunch.

I'm not quite sure how I got roped into that, but it turned out to be a great way to meet other soloists - and what a lot of us there are on here - especially as they move everyone around to a different table once during the meal.

There was Avril, who likes Saga but cruises mostly with Fred Olsen because they're cheaper, Madeleine, who had cruised once with Costa, and was enjoying the fact that announcements are only made in one language, and Charles, who was a cruise virgin and came on to see if he still has his sea legs from his days as a merchant seaman.

A real mixed bag then, none with a bad word to say about Saga Pearl II, although one Saga regular said she preferred Saga Rose (which the Pearl replaced) because of its more classic design and higher ceilings.

Another said she preferred Saga Pearl II to the Fred Olsen ships because Saga operates an open dining system on here so you can eat when you like and sit with whom you want.

I'm with her. It's lovely to have that freedom, but I reckon anyone who likes to eat at the same time and table every night could have a quiet word with the maitre d' and get themselves sorted. It's a small ship - it holds about 450 passengers - and the crew are so good I'm sure they can fix anything.

Although I have never cruised with Saga before, this cruise has felt a bit like coming home.

Barry Brown, who has been giving lectures about the movies, was on a Queen Mary 2 cruise I did last May, while Gavin Baxter, the executive chef, was on a Black Sea cruise I did a couple of years ago with sister cruise line Spirit of Adventure. He used to make me special hot curries.

And then there is John Parton, who was cruise director on my Spirit cruise in Asia in February and is about to reprise his role as CD on Pearl II.

Come on board. You'll have some fun.

With Azura out of the way, excitement is mounting at P&O Towers about the imminent arrival of new ship Adonia.

When I say imminent, it's actually a year from now before the ship enters service and new is not quite accurate either as the ship has been doing the round for a while now.

It launched in 2001 as R8 for the now defunct Renaissance Cruises, became Minerva II for Swan Hellenic, then when Swan was sold it was moved across to Princess Cruises and renamed Royal Princess.

It joins P&O Cruises as Adonia, an adult-only ship, in May 2011 and will be based in Southampton until October, sailing to the Med and Northern Europe. In October, it moves to the Med so P&O can try its luck with six flycruises.

I have cruised on the vessel twice - once when it was Minerva II and then last September in the Black Sea when it was Royal Princess, and it is a lovely little ship. There's room for just 710 passengers so it has a more cosy feel than the likes of Azura and Ventura, which I am sure will go down a storm with P&O people.

The only drawback for me is the fixed dining system that Princess operates and which no doubt P&O will continue. However, there are also two small restaurants where Princess has its steakhouse and Sabatini's, the multi-course Italian trattoria, on alternate nights.

It'll be interesting to see what P&O does with these spaces given its love affair with celebrity chefs. How about a Sindhu spin off (that's the Indian restaurant on Azura) alternating with an Adonian Rhodes? Yum!

There three things I especially liked about Saga Pearl II. One was what they have done with the decor during the ship's multi-million-pound refit, another was that the other passengers made me feel so young!

And then there was that wonderful suite and my excellent butler, Dennis, who popped in every evening with my canopes and an infectious smile. No wonder I didn't want to leave.

Last week's cruise on Pearl around the Baltic was the first time I had been on a Saga cruise - in fact it was my first time on a Saga ship bar a quick look around the Pearl in Southampton in March, just before it set off on its inaugural - and I really didn't know what to expect.

In the event I had a great time. The ship is not glitzy or glamorous, the passengers are not hankering to go climbing walls, but it's all very friendly.

Conversations strike up over a drink on the comfy sofas outside the Sundowner (you'll need to watch the video to know what I am talking about) or in Shackletons, where I spent most evenings propping up the bar.

There is a downside to cruising with older people though. Come 10.30pm the ship is almost deserted because after the evening show - a mix of classical concerts and Steve Galler on the banjo - everyone heads to bed.

If you want lively nightlife, this is not the cruise line for you. If, however, you want a relaxing cruise with good service and genuinely good food - and actually served hot (which reminds me to thank to Gavin for spicing up my curry!) - why not give it a go.

The baffling thing about the new afternoon tea that Fred Olsen has introduced on all its ships is not that they are charging for it - show me a cruise line that isn't looking for new ways to increase on-board revenue - but that they describe it as a "proper" afternoon tea.

What, I wonder, have they been serving all this time in the dining room when the clock strikes three (or is it four?).

And indeed continue to serve for those who don't want to pay for the new enhanced tea? Next time I'm on I'll be examining those improper sandwiches very carefully.

The "proper" tea costs £5.95 a head and is served by waiters wearing white gloves. There's all sorts of teas including herbal varieties, sandwiches, scones with cream and jam and cakes.

But the best bit is you get to have all this in more secluded surrounds - away from the bustle of the main dining room as it's only for about 40 other passengers a time - with music playing in the background.

Far more elegant you have to admit.

But will Fred followers play the game and pay the extra? I'm told it's booked up fast each time it's been listed in the daily programme. Presumably by people other than JA (pure coincidence I promise!). I somehow get the impression he/she is not impressed.

OK that's a bit of an exaggeration. I was only a butler for about 15 minutes when I visited Azamara Journey in Greenwich today. No matter. It was still a bit of an eye-opener.

I discovered there is such a thing as synchronised service, where butlers walk in step one after another, take their places around a table (they have to time their walk so all arrive in place at the same time) and take their instruction - a slight eye movement -  from the lead butler on when to serve the plates.

They hold in position, hand on plate, until another almost imperceptible eye movement tells them to stand up and back away from the table and another gives them the nod to leave the room.

And I had to do all that. Phew. Here I am "serving" Jo Rzymowska, Royal Caribbean's associate vice-president and general manager UK and Ireland.

The aim was to show us the rigorous English-trained butler service now offered on Azamara since its rebirth as the more inclusive Azamara Club Cruises.

Big changes happened in April - new itineraries that linger longer in destinations, gratuities and wine with dinner included in the cruise price and an English-trained butler to service each suite (previously they had a butler for every cabin but they were not "proper" butlers, it was whispered to me today!).

To be honest much of the training comes down to common sense, an individual's people skills and learning eye for detail - they have to spot when a cushion is the wrong way up or a water bottle label is facing the wrong way, for instance.

The key for me is that they also have to learn how to "read" passengers in double-quick time so they can provide a service that suits each individual.

For instance, the butlers can be your wardrobe manager and tidy your clothes away, which no doubt some people would love but I would dislike. Their skill is in finding that out before I have to tell them. Assuming I can pluck up the courage to admit I prefer to be untidy!

I was dead chuffed after the role play when Rob Preston, marketing and service coach for Triple S Consultancy, which was pulled in to train Azamara's butlers, said my synchronised service skills were excellent. Was this another career waiting in the wings?

And then I overheard him say it to everyone who had a go.

Oh well. Back to the keyboard.

Somewhere between quaffing the various glasses of Champagne that appeared in my hand from the moment I set foot on Yachts of Seabourn's Seabourn Sojourn until the early hours of the next morning I managed to take some video footage of the ship.

You think I am joking - about the bubbly that is? I'm really not. And the free-flowing fizz wasn't just for the naming ceremony either.

Welcome to the world of ultra-luxury cruising.

Yes, it looks expensive on paper, but when you look at all the tangible things that are included (gratuities as well as all drinks and speciality dining) as well as the intangible ones (being treated as a person rather than a passenger, the nice feeling that crew are smiling because they want to rather than because they are thinking about their tip) and you can see why the ultra-lux lines are so popular.

The Passenger Shipping Association stats show that 50% more Brits chose an ultra-lux cruise last year compared with 2008. They were undoubtedley drawn by all the offers put in place by the cruise lines to keep people booking during the recession.

The interesting question will be, how many of those new-to-ultra-luxury cruisers can bear to go back to the four and five-star favourites when those offers are no longer around?

It's time to click the video start button. Enjoy.

While on Crystal Symphony last week, I asked Crystal Cruises president Gregg Michel if he thinks traditional two-sitting fixed dining will continue to operate 12 months after the cruise line's new open dining by reservation system launches in January 2011.

To my surprise he does, not just because the Crystal Society members like it but he predicts the new-to-cruise passengers Crystal hopes will be attracted by the more flexible option will move to traditional dining by their second or third cruise.

Crystal maintains their CS passengers like fixed dining because they like to have the same waiter and meet people. But meet people is exactly what you don't do on a fixed dining system, because you are seated with the same other passengers every night.

Deadly dull, and potentially a nightmare, which is why I reckon there'll be a move to open dining when those CS passengers see there is another way.

Which of us will be right? Why not leave a comment and let me know what you think.

I've seen crew stationed in busy self-service buffets to help passengers find a table but Norwegian Cruise Line has taken it a stage further on Norwegian Epic.

Five table spotters are stationed in the Garden Cafe during breakfast, lunch and dinner, and wired up to each other so they can work together to locate free tables for passengers.

I was greeted at the entrance with the information that all food stations were open but there were more free tables on the starboard side. Other spotters were positioned inside the buffet to escort passengers to free tables if they couldn't locate one.

If they see a table being vacated they can call in and make sure it is cleared quickly. If they see two people about to take up a table for four or six they can move in and gently offer to find them a smaller one.

It's a great idea and seemed to be working well at breakfast yesterday, when it was busy even though there were only 1,900 passengers on board.

Goodness knows what it'll be like when the ship is full with close to 5,000.

In truth I don't think Norwegian Cruise Line is having suite dreams on Norwegian Epic just yet, because workmen are still beavering away to finish the very best accommodation on the ship, up in the villa complex.

Which of course now explains why I was not allocated a room there!

Seriously, thanks to Andy Stuart, NCL's executive vice-president sales, I managed to get a look-see at the areas in the complex that are ready.

It houses 60 suites, some Penthouse suites, but mostly Courtyard Suites like this one I was able to see. They sell it for up to six people but I would find it cramped with more than two, maybe three at a push.

Strangely, the master bedroom pictured here, has a view not out to sea, as you would expect, but straight into the bathroom (what is this bathroom fixation with NCL?). But what a bathroom. Another bathtub with a fabulous view out to sea and you also get a shower cubicle with a view.

I guess you'd just have to watch out the ship never moors next to a tall block of flats!

Behind the master bedroom there's a window-less bedroom where the kids can sleep (Andy tells me these suites on NCL's Jewel-class ships are very popular with families). They have their own bathroom and there is also this separate living area, pictured here.

The villa complex, which is accessed by key card so only villa people can get in, also houses the Epic Club Lounge, leading to a restaurant, below. The menu is not very inspiring with burgers, steaks and the like, but the décor is lovely and it's wonderfully peaceful away from the hoi-polloi!.

The complex also has a private pool and sundeck - no pictures as it's still being worked on but I can tell you it has big double loungers, which are great for snuggling up to the one you love - and an exclusive nightclub, Posh, which again is still being finished so I didn't get to see it.

All this is housed in that much-talked of "lump" on the top of Epic, which really doesn't do anything for the ship's looks. But I'll tell you what. If you had a suite up here, you wouldn't give a damn what it looks like from the outside.

Talk about little and large.

I got off Norwegian Cruise Line's new 4,100-passenger Norwegian Epic last Thursday and ths afternoon - Saturday - board Compagnie du Ponant's just-launched 264-passenger Le Boreal for a cruise to Hamburg by way of France, Belgium and Holland.

As you might guess from the name, this is a French cruise line so I'm really looking forward to seeing how they do things - the service of course, but also the food. After all, if they can't get the cuisine right on a French ship, there really is no hope.

Internet-willing, I'll be posting information and pictures from the cruise so don't forget to join me.

You learn something new every day, don't you?

I had lunch with Simon Weir, hotel director on Celebrity Eclipse, who has brought out all Celebrity's new Solstice-class ships, at the finale of the Association of Cruise Experts conference in Southampton last Saturday and naturally asked how things were going with the ship.

You will remember it is based in Southampton, offering cruises largely aimed at the British - a double first for Celebrity.
 
All good, he told me, explaining they were even managing to satisfy the British demand for hot food.

The British demand? You mean the Americans don't like their food hot? I asked. No, he said. They like it lukewarm. In fact it's not just the Americans, but also most Europeans as well, leaving us Brits the odd ones out yet again.

I relate this only because a) I didn't know it and think it is interesting, and b) it begins to explain why food on cruise ships is served lukewarm, bordering on cold (of course it doesnt explain it for the British ones...).

Personally I like my soup piping hot, likewise my pasta, meat, whatever. Otherwise it's like drinking warm instead of hot tea. Yuk.

Maybe the solution is to mention, at the time of ordering, "by the way I am a Brit and I like my food served nuclear" (that's how the dishes were served in the Noodle Bar on Norwegian Epic - American! - and I loved it, making it my favourite place to eat).

I'll try it tonight here on Compagnie du Ponant's Le Boreal - so far the food has been lukewarm, which I have found disappointing - and let you know how I get on.

Before I came on Le Boreal, I said if this ship - because it is French - can't get the food right there is no hope.

Well, overall executive chef Jean-Pierre Hupin has done a good job, even (while cursing "Les Anglaises" no doubt) cooking my meat so it is well done.

My main criticism is that there isn't much choice in the evening - a soup to get things going, a choice of two appetisers and three main courses, and that's the lot.

Or so it appeared.

Last night a couple on my table didn't fancy what was on the menu and asked for a steak instead. After being asked rather rudely by the person overseeing the restaurant what was wrong with what was on the menu and told they couldn't have anything else, a more senior person appeared, apologised for the mistake and said there is menu of "always available" dishes, including Caesar salad, grilled fish and steak. They just don't show it.

So we don't know, and neither do the waiters. Make sense of that.

It's not been the easiest of menus for me as there has been a lot of fish, which I don't eat (actually that gave me an excuse to have foie gras twice one meal so I'm not complaining too much!), or for a vegetarian friend as the alternative to fish always has been meat.

Until last night (it was an eventful meal, you can tell).

To my surprise - and delight because I also did not want the fish or veal on offer - there was "Vegetarian penne pasta, Aragula sauce". Just to be on the safe side though, I asked Hadi, our waiter, what aragula was. Anchovies, he said.

Now I know that a) Le Boreal is a French cruise ship and the French don't do vegetarian, and b) some vegetarians eat fish (which I still never quite get), but Compagnie du Ponant will have to do better than that if they seriously want to attract more non-French passengers.

One of the nicest things about being on Le Boreal was that I didn't have to walk miles to get from one end of the ship to the other. Unlike on Norwegian Epic!

The ship - really more a yacht - holds just 264 passengers, which gives you some idea just how small it is.

There are all sorts of things I like about the vessel. I have already mentioned the cabins and the colour scheme, but down all the corridors are pictures of yachts, ships and people, all in the same grey-white, but all with a splash of red somewhere. It's really effective.

I love these hoody sunbeds by the pool - but there are only two so I was lucky to grab one - and the service has been fine. It's a bit haphazard but generally delivered with a smile, which is more important to me than stoney-faced perfection.

As on other cruise ships, crew are from all over the world including Indonesia, Mauritius and Eastern Europe but all speak French and English so there are no language problems, even though this is a French ship.

Also, all announcements are made in French and English, mainly by the brilliant Captain Etienne Garcia, a real social butterfly who was so keen to keep us up to date with what was happening as we cruised that he was at the microphone at all hours.

Only problem is that all the announcements come straight into the cabin and can't be switched off. Doesn't worry me as I am an early riser, but I am sure some were none too happy when he came on to wish us a happy wake up at 7.20am as we sailed into Hamburg!

He said the English always complain because he has told the French more and the French always complain because, yes, you 've guessed it, they say he tells the English more. "Actually it's all unscripted so I just say what I remember," he admitted.

He says he can't wait to get back to Antarctica, where Le Boreal will be sailing this winter after a season in the Baltic and Med.

All the port talks on my sector of the cruise were in French, which is not very good for English-speakers and I am assured is not the norm. "It's because there are only five Germans on board," I was told. Hmmmm. So somehow the 10 or so English speakers didn't count.

Likewise the information provided in the daily programme was quite cursory - it forgot to mention such things as shuttle buses - and the shore excursion programme looked almost like an afterthought.

There were just two excursions at each port, and all very run of the mill - historical Ghent, medieval Ghent, Hamburg city tour, and so on. But at least they did lay on English-speaking tours when required and of course they were the best ones to be on because as it was just a small group so you saw a lot more.

I mentioned the food was very French; so was the entertainment. I would put it about 20 years out of date for the Brits - dance and mime in twee costumes - but it's what appeals to the French and that's important because they will always be the majority of passengers.

Not that there ever seemed to be many people in the theatre at show time. Or indeed any of the lounges on the ship after dinner. I gather they ate and then went back to their cabins to watch films on the TV. It did mean the ship lacked any atmosphere in the evening.

So why come on here? Well it is a beautiful ship and frankly lends itself to a very relaxing holiday. There's no hassle, no fuss, no one pushing to sell you anything. You can just switch off and eat, sleep and read a book, maybe have a spa treatment. And all that with the great crew in attendance if you do want something.

Appealing or what?

I've already posted a few pictures and impressions of Compagnie du Ponant's new ship Le Boreal, but here you can see the ship and some of my thoughts on video.

The ship itself, and the decor are lovely, and as I explained before, the atmosphere and food on board is very French. I'm afraid I couldn't go for the frogs' legs on the BBQ, but the chicken and steak served up by executive chef Jean-Pierre Hupin, who is seen here on the video, were tasty.

And despite the look of horror when I asked, he agreed to cook my steak well done - looking more understanding when I excused myself on the grounds that I am English!

Enjoy.

One of the things I liked most about Holland America Line's new ship Nieuw Amsterdam was the New York theming (in case you're wondering why, Nieuw Amsterdam was a 17th-century Dutch colonial settlement before the British arrived in 1664, kicked out the Dutch and renamed it New York).

There's the chandelier that shows the skyline of New York - I watched for ages from all sorts of angles in the hope of seeing Liberty's torch light up, but to no avail - all sorts of montage art work and even an authentic New York cab in the kids' club.

Luckily there were no children around when this big kid sneaked onto their club room to have her picture taken in the cab!

Although Nieuw Amsterdam is a clone of Eurodam, I liked this new ship better. Maybe it's the artwork, more likely it's because I have only ever seen Eurodam under the grey skies of Northern Europe - first in Southampton and then on a very rainy mini cruise from Dover last year.

Certainly the cabanas on deck 11, pictured below, looked a whole lot more attractive with the Adriatic sun shining on them - and there were sun loungers on the deck for anyone who wanted a bit of sun - and I began to see why passengers might shell out the $75 to book one for a sea day ($45 on a port day).

Well almost. It is still an awful lot of money for just one day.

I was delighted to see the Silk Den is back again - what a lovely bar with its comfy sofas and whispy curtains - but was really quite disappointed by the service, which was more than slow in the restaurants. And getting wine to go with an evening meal was a real challenge.

In the Pinnacle Grill, pictured above, myself and a well-known fellow blogger asked for our steaks to be well done. When they arrived, the waitress asked us to cut them to see if they were to our liking. Both looked good on the outside but inside they were still moo-ing.

Now you can look at this two ways. Either a) it was good service that she asked us to check the steaks while she stood and watched or b) chefs in a steakhouse should be more skilled at cooking a steak.

I know what I think.

Of course it's a new ship and of course service will improve.

While on the subject, I must put in a good word for our room steward Rony, who managed to get my super chilly and super noisy air-conditioning repaired in super fast time. A huge relief.

Keep a look out because my video from Nieuw Amsterdam will be posted shortly.

The sun is beating down and there is an enormous - and noisy - worksite outside my balcony.

Welcome to Malaga and Princess Cruises' Grand Princess, which I boarded earlier today for a wine-themed cruise to Civitavecchia, the port for Rome.

I'm doing a wine-tasting on board tomorrow, visiting wine cellars from Barcelona the next day and Chateau de Cremat from Monte Carlo the day after that for yet more wine-tasting.

It's a tough life, isn't it?

Actually it's all a bit nostalgic for me as this is the ship I got married on in 2004. Then I was in the Baltic, somewhere between Copenhagen and Stockholm. And yes, although I seem to be rarely at home these days - I managed a record five days between getting off Nieuw Amsterdam and this trip! - I am still married. Maybe brief encouters are the secret?

In between all the wine tasting, I'll be sampling the food in Sabatini's, the ship's Italian multi-course speciality restaurant, and in Sterling Steakhouse, which is my favourite place to eat on a Princess ship.

I also plan to have lunch ashore a couple of times as a cruise is such a great way to try local cuisine in several countries on one holiday. I know eating ashore costs extra and the food on board is all paid for so in effect you are paying twice for a meal, but hey, you only live once and surely travelling - even cruising - is all about experiencing, and tasting, local cultures.

Internet willing, I'll keep you posted about the ship, the food and the excursions so be sure to keep checking back.

I mentioned that my cruise on Grand Princess this week has something of a wine-theme as it's been all about discovering how easy it is to visit wineries in the various countries we are calling at and enjoy a glass or two of the local tipple.

It links in with a mini brochure Princess Cruises has produced that's aimed at inspiring passengers to do their own wine-themed thing in the ports in France, Italy and Spain that Grand Princess visits on its cruises from Southampton.

"We're not just out to sell excursions," Princess head of brand marketing Pieter van der Schee explained. "We actually want our passengers to have a really enjoyable holiday and wine tasting is one thing we believe many people will enjoy. Hopefully the leaflet will help to give them ideas."

How refreshing is that?

In fact my tasting lessons started on Grand with a wine-tasting session with sommelier Stefano, below, who had picked a Champagne and five wines - two white and three red - for us to sample.

We learnt where the wine came from, how to swirl it properly before sniffing, how to sniff it - why can I never get the aromas of strawberries, blackberries, roses and so on, like everyone else? - what the colour told us, what legs are and what food to eat with the wine. And then finally were allowed to taste.

Two hours later we all left as very happy experts!

Next day, from Barcelona, we drove 45 minutes out of town to Cava country, to visit the Freixenet estate and taste the Spanish sparking wine they produce.

I'd never heard of Freixenet and expected a small company in a little town of Sant Sadurni d'Anoia, which I'd also never heard of. How wrong can you be? They produce 80 million bottles of Cava a year, 70% of which is exported. And boy do they love their branding. Just look at this bottle lamp and the picture below of me in front of the car!

We were taken on a tour of the vineyards, the visitor centre, which explains how Cava is made, the bottling plant and the cellars, ending the visit with a 15-minute mini-train ride through more cellars ... and more cellars ... and more cellars. Enough cellars in fact to hold 80 million bottles.

Actually the train ride was not quite the end as naturally there was a Cava tasting, augmented with some Spanish jamon, saucisson sec and bread with tomato. So if you do this you also get to taste some of the local tapas as well. Heaven!

And then it was on to Monaco, from where we snuck into France - not so difficult considering how tiny Monaco is! - to visit Chateau de Cremat just outside Nice, which was quite different from Freixenet. An estate with just 15 hectares that produces just 40,000 bottles of red, white and rose wine a year that's all sold in local shops and restaurants.

Roxanne, the guide, took us into the cellars, which date back to Roman times and where you can still see the rooms where they used to tread grapes. That tap on the left side is where the juice came out.

To do this tour, you need to pre-book and have a minimum 10 people. Cost is €15 (€19 at weekends), which includes a visit to the cellar and three wines to taste. For €25 (€32 at weekends) they'll throw in a feast of local ham, saucisson sec, cheese and bread. Highly recommended!

Princess has plenty of other suggestions for wine-based tours - excursions to bodegas from Seville to find out all about sherry-making, Chianti-tasting in the countryside around Livorno, trips to find out about the Campania wines produced outside Naples.

What a shame I'm getting off now so I can't try them out for you.

But at least it gives me a great excuse to come back!

My first task on boarding the Veendam in New York on Sunday was to check out the new stuff Holland America Line added to the ship last year as part of its latest Signature of Excellence package of upgrades.

Veendam was the first to get the $40 million package, which is now being rolled out across the line's other older ships.

There's the adult-only Retreat, a shallow pool that comes complete with loungers - it's a little cramped for my liking but they have been very popular on this cruise to Bermuda - and Mix, which comprises three different bars, one for Martini, one for Champagne and one for Spirits and Ales.

The Martini bar houses HAL's signature piano man - I say signature because the piano bar has been one of the most popular evening venues on every Holland America ship I've been on. Until now. Romeo is a perfectly good player but lacks charisma so the area has no people and no atmosphere.

Instead of trying to get a seat at the piano, my daughter and I have been hanging around to grab one of these great tables with built-in games. You just touch the table to move the pieces around.

There's chess, checkers and all sorts of other games that we haven't worked out yet (mainly because we can't be bothered to read the rules!).

Veendam has a Canaletto Italian restaurant like the one that debuted first on Eurodam - like the Eurodam one it's actually part of the buffet turned into a waiter service eatery in the evening with no charge to eat there.

We tried it last night and were very tempted to book a table there for the rest of the cruise as the service was friendly and the food tasty.

Not that there's anything wrong with the dining room food or service. It's just that we haven't actually managed to get in there yet. We are on open seating and want to turn up and dine, which surely is the whole point of it, but other open-seating diners make reservations because they don't want to take a chance. Upshot? You can get a table before 6.30pm or after 9pm if you want to eat then. Which we don't.

But the really big change has been the addition of this new grade cabin called Lanai. These have floor-to-ceiling doors that open out to the Lower Promenade Deck, making them something between an oceanview and a balcony cabin, albeit your balcony is a little communal.

You can come in and out of the promenade-side doors and they are very handy for the lifeboat drill you'll notice. No prizes for guessing who'll be first in the boats if there's an emergency!

On the down side, you have to put up with passengers taking their morning constitutional past your door (the deck is also the walking track).

And apparently you do have to watch out at night as passers-by can see inside when the lights are on! But then that's what curtains are for.

You can always dine like a star in one of the celebrity chef-backed speciality restaurants on five P&O Cruises' ships.

Gary Rhodes has Oriana Rhodes and Arcadian Rhodes on Oriana and Arcadia; Indian chef Atul Kochhar has Sindhu on Azura; Marco Pierre White has put his name to The White Room on Ventura, Cafe Bordeaux on Aurora and Cafe Jardin on Oceana.

But for a limited time only P&O is offering something extra - a Cruise & Dine promotion giving you the chance to eat out at one of Gary Rhodes', Atul Kochhar's or Marco Pierre White's swanky land-based restaurants.

All you have to do to be in with a chance of winning is book a 2011 P&O cruise on which one of the celeb chefs is travelling.

They are:

Gary Rhodes
May 3: Oriana - Western Med.
September 4: Oriana - Spain, Portugal and France.
March 29: Arcadia - Western Med.
July 21: Arcadia. Spitsbergen and Fjords.

Atul Kochhar
May 12: Azura - Central Med.
July 3: Azura - Baltic.
September 18: Azura - Spain, Portugal, Morocco.
November 11: Azura - Caribbean.

Marco Pierre White
March 27: Ventura - Western Med.
June 20: Aurora - Central Med.
July 23: Oceana - Western Med.
September 3: Ventura - Western Med.
November 9: Oceana - Canary Islands.

Bookings must be made between August 1 and November 30 2010. Once booked, email your name, address, booking reference and choice of restaurant to cruiseanddine@pocruises.com.

Winners will be chosen at random - there are 70 prizes to give away - and presented in the form of a £150 voucher to be used against the total cost of the meal.

I have to award full marks to Princess Cruises for the huge choice of vegetarian dishes they offer at each dinner in the dining room.

On the first evening on this New England cruise on Caribbean Princess there were 10 dishes, the next nine. Admittedly that included the fruit and cheese plates, but it's still an impressive choice.

It's not something I've ever really taken much notice of until recently, when my daughter became a vegetarian.

She was thrilled with the choice on Princess, especially after struggling on Holland America's Veendam a couple of weeks ago, when there was just one veggie main course each evening in the dining room.

Thy did have a very tasty minestrone soup in Canaletto, Veendam's Italian specialty restaurant, but on the third night we went there the chef decided it would be better if there were bacon bits in it.

The waiter was mortified. "No no it can't be meat, it's a vegetarian soup," he proclaimed as he took the bowl back to the kitchen. He arrived with another. Again it had meat in it, again he was sure it couldn't be. He returned armed with a salad and apologising profusely on behalf of the chef. "He's new," he explained.

Happily, when they served minestrone on Caribbean Princess it wasn't just been meat-free, but also cheese free (they automatically put cheese in it on Holland America - actually they put cheese on almost everything, which I find a problem - rather than offering it at the table, as I believe is more correct).

Where Holland America did score was in the Pinnacle Grill steakhouse, where there was a veggie option. In the Crown Grill on Caribbean Princess, my daughter had to make up a main course with a selection of side orders.

And before anyone points it out, I know it's not the best eating venue for a veggie but I like the steaks and didn't want to eat alone.

Oceania calls itself a foodie cruise line but this is nothing to do with those kind of pounds.

Finally Oceania is pricing its cruises in sterling.

It's great news for the line but no surprise to me. At a lunch in March, chairman Frank del Rio told me they were "working on the technology" to be able to sell in the UK currency, admitting dollar pricing was an "obstacle to sales" over here.

That was interesting to hear after the UK team only a few weeks before had told me it wasn't a issue. "The British like the dollar pricing."

Seems they have been listening to the boss as European sales and marketing director Bernie Carter now cites the move to sterling is an "incredibly big step forward" that will lead to a rise in demand.

It certainly is - and certainly is also a much needed step as they have a new big ship to fill from January (the 1,258-passenger Marina) and a sister on the way.

A sterling-priced brochure is due out next month featuring all 2011 itineraries including the 2011/12 winter programme.

I had a sneaking suspicion my cruise on Yachts of Seabourn's Seabourn Odyssey was going to be good, mainly because I know the ship and have experienced Seabourn's service before.

My daughter and I were in a standard veranda suite, so not the best accommodation on the ship, but with Seabourn you don't need to aim for the top to have a room big enough for two of you to have our own space. A real sign of luxury to me.

The bathroom was spacious - honestly as big as some single cabins I have seen - with a separate shower and bath. The suite had a walk-in closet, an iPod dock and of course a balcony; the TV had a built-in selection of something like 200 films.

Before you ask, no I didn't count them so I may be way off the mark. But there were a lot and it was an eclectic mix to suit all tastes. My only gripe was that there wasn't a book listing the films as it would have been so much easier to see what was available.

At 30,000 tons, the ship is a lovely size, not so small that it feels every wave, but not so big that you feel exhausted just getting from one end to the other.

The décor is tasteful but understated as suits the ultra-luxury market and I just love the way you can go to a bar and waiters appear offering Champagne, cocktails, any drink you chose - and it's all free.

OK, I know you pay for it in the cruise price, but not having waiters hovering for you to sign for drinks makes the atmosphere on board so much friendlier.

I really enjoyed the itinerary - and give myself a pat on the back that we chose good shore excursions in Katakolon and Gythion, neither of which ports has much to do that can't be done in under an hour.

I overheard one man desperate to book an excursion in Mykonos after our day in Gythion ("we'd seen it in half an hour. I can't stand a day like that again") and disappointed when there was only a beach trip, which he didn't want.

Just as well he didn't book though, because the wind was blowing a gale in Mykonos, more so than usual, so the captain changed the all-aboard time from 10pm that evening to 2pm because the forecast said it would get even worse.

Just before 2pm, he decided the wind had risen as much as it was going to and announced the tenders would keep running.

But by then most passengers had "done" Mykonos, so they put on a film to give people to do.

Ilana and I went back ashore and had another walk around the maze of streets. It's a great place to just lose yourself for an hour or so.

Although overall the cruise was excellent, and I could happily be seduced by the ultra-luxury lifestyle, some things were very disappointing.

The shows were dull at best, even the comedian, and as a result mostly poorly attended (the best evening was when they had a party on the open deck, when everyone was up and dancing), they let themselves down a few times on service - food and drink ordered that never showed - and I was surprised how inflexible they were at meal times.

One evening in the dining room I asked if I could have a starter from upstairs, in the bistro. The waitress said that was not allowed but she would ask for special permission.

It was granted, but how strange she had to ask. When I have cruised with Spirit of Adventure, nowhere near so luxurious, they have never batted an eyelid if I asked for a meal from "upstairs".

My daughter had a bigger problem as a vegetarian. In the dining room there was always at least one veggie starter and two main course veggie options - one different every day, the other the same pasta from the always-available menu.

In the bistro - it's the buffet, which is waiter service with a themed meal each evening - there were no veggie meals at all. They would deign to fetch the one from the dining room menu, but for some reason they would not bring you the pasta dish (which often was much nicer!).

So Princess still wears the veggie crown!

As an aside, during the Captain's welcome, when neither of us could eat the fishy canapés going around, one kind soul (I know her name but don't want to risk spelling it incorrectly) whizzed off and fetched us some peanuts. Brilliant!

That's more what I expected and have experienced before with Seabourn. For a moment they were back to their old top-notch service self.

It's not every day you go to a cruise event and come away with a packet of gnocchi, a pot of tomato sauce and a large wedge of cheese.

So I was bewildered to be handed all three items in my press pack when I went to Southampton this week to see the traditional handover of gifts to mark MSC Poesia's maiden call to the port.

Maybe MSC Cruises was looking to cut costs by getting everyone to cook their own lunch?

Happily not. It was all because there was a cookery demonstration before lunch with one of the chefs showing us how to make gnocchi.

It was also to promote MSC's three forthcoming food and wine-themed cruises - on MSC Lirica as it sails from Genoa to Buenos Aires in November, on a Venice roundtrip voyage on MSC Magnifica next April and a Genoa-Genoa cruise on MSC Splendida in December 2011.

On sea days, there'll be cookery demonstrations, wine, cigar and liquor-tasting events, sessions explaining how to mix a cocktail, as well as lessons on how to receive guests.

That's the good old napkin folding!

Who says cruising isn't what it used to be?

As well as handing over plaques, books and other gifts during MSC Poesia's maiden visit to Southampton this week, MSC Cruises UK and Ireland MD Giulio Libutti took the opportunity to remind everyone that MSC Opera's no-fly cruises next summer will depart from Southampton.

They are switching from Dover because Southampton has better road, rail and air links - a fact passengers seem to agree with as bookings for 2011's no-fly cruises are 100% up on the same time last year.

I reckon they are also making the move because they can now offer cruises to France and Spain instead of only going to the Baltic and Norwegian fjords.

MSC Opera, pictured here going through a fjord, will be sailing nine eight-night cruises that call at Amsterdam, then spin around and go to La Rochelle and Cherbourg in France, and Bilbao and La Coruna in Spain.

Passengers can embark at any of the ports - a clever move which allows MSC to tap into the Dutch, French and Spanish markets as well as the UK.

Britons taking no-fly cruises from Southampton can expect traditional afternoon tea, free tap water with their meals and tea or coffee afterwards (you don't get any of that on MSC's other cruises) and some Brit dishes on the menu.

I'm intrigued to know what Italian-style cottage pie is like!

Crystal Cruises has a new Go Green excursion in Malta for passengers visiting the island on two itineraries on Crystal Serenity next month.

It's not one of the new voluntourism days out it announced it is introducing in 2011 when I was on Crystal Symphony because they will be free and you have to pay for this one, but it's in the same vein.

It costs $95, lasts eight hours and involves planting trees and learning about conservation efforts at the island's Ta' Qali National Park. That's followed by lunch at an organic farm and a visit to an orphanage, where passengers "will donate time and food to the young residents".

I assume the idea is you buy food from the organic farm rather than bring tins of baked beans and packets of pasta from the UK.

However, think how worthy it would be to go without that fourth or fifth pair of shoes and instead bring some toys for the kids instead.

Surely everyone could manage that?

The new Samba Grill on Allure of the Seas has become the third most popular restaurant on the ship based on online bookings, according to Lisa Bauer, Royal Caribbean International's senior vice-president hotel operations.

The Churrascaria, or Brazilan steakhouse, is one of several new dining options on Royal Caribbean's Allure of the Seas.

It's in the solarium, replacing the healthy evening meals served in the Solarium Bistro on Oasis of the Seas, which Richard Fain, Royal's chairman and CEO, reveals has been popular for breakfast and lunch but hasn't been very well frequented come nightfall.

Fain also reveals the heavy burden he has to shoulder when they come up with a new culinary idea like this.

"A year ago, we were making final preparations for opening the cupcake cupboard onboard Oasis of the Seas and I fulfilled my responsibility by participating in extensive testing of the cupcakes we planned to offer. One has to do what one has to do!

"And this year, I feel equally obliged to test the menu for the new Samba Grill being constructed onboard Allure of the Seas."

It's a hard life.

Actually I feel for him having to taste cup cakes (yuk!) but I'd be by his side tasting the meats, sliced straight from the skewers, in the Samba Grill. In fact, my fingers are already tightly crossed that I'll get to try it out when I'm on Allure for the inaugural celebrations in November.

I am also delighted to read that Rita's Cantina is replacing the Seafood Shack in the Boardwalk on Oasis of the Seas. Not only is Seafood Shack hard to say to video - try it a couple of times and you'll see what I mean - I don't eat fish so it was a no-go area for me.

However, a Mexican cantina has got my name on it. They'll be serving margaritas (surely it should be tequila?) to the sounds of live guitar music.

Also on the Boardwalk is the Dog House, which I will have to try just because I love the name. No prizes for guessing what it'll serve. Hot dogs, of course.

In he blog, Bauer's says the Samba Grill - $25 per person, with a veggie option at $15 per person - is the third most popular restaurant by advance bookings on Allure, but which ones come in at number one and number two?

Anyone got a clue?

It's not often I can't make up my mind about a ship, but after one week on Star Clippers' sailing ship Star Flyer I was still asking myself, was this a luxurious experience or not?

For sure it's not luxury in the conventional sense of the word as Yachts of Seabourn and Silversea are. The cabins are small, the bathrooms are pokey, there's no one to escort you to your cabin when you first arrive.

Indeed when my daughter and I were disembarking after seven days on board, the crew in the dining room said goodbye and just watched as we carried our luggage up the stairs.

But look at it from another angle. You are on a real sailing ship that gracefully slices through the water when the canvas is hoisted (and that's most of the time, on the orders of Mikael Krafft, who owns the cruise line).

It holds just 170 passengers (and on my cruise there were only around 100), there are no dress codes and no one telling you where to sit in the evening. That's my idea of luxury.

The decor is lovely, with lots of brass and mahogany (see pictures below), the guys behind the bar and most of the waiters did a great job and the food, while not gourmet, was not bad.

My daughter and I boarded Star Flyer in Giardini Naxos, Sicily, the port for Taormina, and the first thing that struck me (apart from how small it looked) was that they were operating the tender in conditions other cruise lines would have deemed too rough and therefore dangerous.

True they had to keep going for a while because it was the only way we and 10 others who were starting our cruise there could get on. But the captain could have told the passengers who sailed in on the ship they would stop the tender service early.

It happened on Seabourn when we were in Mykonos just a week before and the sea was nowhere near as rough.

But no. On Star Flyer they treat you as adults, able to make up your own mind whether you can get on and off a tender, which was very refreshing.

(My only complaint was that the crew in charge of the tenders told you to take your time and when you did, they yanked you out. On one occasion, it left me with a cut and bruised leg.)

The bruise aside, everything (including the price, from £2,600 per person for 14 nights cruise-only) should have combined to provide a luxurious experience.

But it wasn't. Something was missing and I'm still struggling to know what.

The poor entertainments team didn't help - the cruise director excelled in speaking French, English and German but little else, and the two lads with her did as little as possible the entire seven days.

While you don't come on Star Flyer for the entertainment, some of their efforts were so lack-lustre they would have been better not bothering at all.

I don't think the excluded drinks helped either. You've got the small ship, the sailing, the convivial open dining - and each couple ordering their own bottle of wine. Or more usually getting the last dregs from the bottle they bought a few nights before.

I'm sure if you asked everyone if they would like wine included with meals they would all say "oh no, we don't drink much".

But you just include the drinks and then tell them and watch their faces light up and the conversation flow. I saw it happen the first night I was on Spirit of Adventure in February, when none of us knew drinks were included.

Given the cruise line's buying power, it wouldn't cost them much so likewise it would add very little to the cruise price, but it would take the whole experience to another level.

And maybe help fill their ships - although actually I think Star Flyer was much nicer with so few passengers on board!

Celebrity Cruises' has announced that its last Solstice-class ship is to be called Celebrity Reflection.

The ship, the fifth in a series that has cost the cruise line $3.7 billion, launches in November 2012. Celebrity says the ship will have new features, but is keeping mum on what they are for now. Probably because they don't know yet.

However, the cruise line has confirmed it will have that famous half-acre real grass lawn, an iLounge where you can play with - and buy - Apple equipment and Qsine, which they bill a "food-as-theatre dining experience" because it's all about weird and wonderful presentation (sushi lollipops or spring rooms in springs).

"It's a fantastic restaurant," someone told me at a glitzy industry awards gathering last night, where Celebrity walked off with a best cruise line award. "The only problem is you order everything and eat too much."

Celebrity Reflection will join sisters Celebrity Solstice, Celebrity Equinox and Celebrity Eclipse, which are in service, and Celebrity Silhouette, which launches in August next year.

Royal Caribbean International took a lot of stick from passengers when it started charging for steaks in the main dining room a couple of years ago - including from Carnival Cruise Lines' senior cruise director and ace cruise blogger John Heald.

Now it seems Heald going to have to eat his words (but maybe do without his steaks) because Carnival has started charging for top-cut steaks and lobster in the dining room on Carnival Triumph, Carnival Paradise and Carnival Inspiration.

Specifically you'll have to pay $18 for a 9oz filet mignon, an 18oz grilled prime rib chop, a broiled Maine lobster tail and a surf-and-turf combo (a half lobster tail and petite filet mignon).

The excuse is that these three ships don't have speciality steakhouses so Carnival is giving them the option to pay for a decent steak in the dining room.

The lesser-quality steaks on the always-available menu will still be there and still be free for those who don't want to pay, but if the responses on USA Today's Cruise Log are anything to go by, charging for food in the dining room is still the beginning of the end of the world as we know it.

This from TX_Dave

"Extra charges in a special dining venue is one thing, extra charges in the main dining room are another. I don't like it."

And this from missdew

"These cruise lines just keep giving me more reasons not to cruise."

It does go against the grain of all food is free in the dining room I know but personally I can't get too excited about it because:

a) you have a choice. If you don't want to pay, don't have the steak;

b) to me, the point of paying extra to dine in a steakhouse - or any other speciality restaurant for that mattter - is to have the more intimate surroundings, better service, with time to digest food between courses, and food that's cooked to order just as you want and served hot, something few cruise lines manage when serving several hundred people at once in the dining rooms.

Would you pay for a steak in the dining room or is this the start of the slippery slope? Let me know.

The self-service on Celebrity Cruises' Century and Millennium-class ships is becoming a, well, self-service, from the end of October.

Have to say I'm amazed to discover that currently there is only waiter service in the lido on these ships - that's the Celebrity Century, Constellation, Infinity, Millennium and Summit - and no option to pick and choose what you fancy from the buffet.

Celebrity is calling the new lido dining an "international marketplace", but basically you get a plate, fill it with food, find a table and eat it. That's self-service to you and me.

I'm sure some passengers will complain at having to fetch their own food but I reckon they'll find the new offering will be much better.

There are curry and pasta stations where the food is made to order so it'll be served hot and you can ask for the chefs to spice it up a bit.

There's stir-fry Asian food, a Mediterranean antipasti selection of olives, cheeses and cold meats, a carving station with grilled meats and of course an area serving uber-sweet desserts.

A made-to-order pizza station will be open until 12.30am.

This is something for all those who fear getting they might be seasick on a cruise - a night out on Cruise and Maritime Voyages' ship Marco Polo while it's tied up at Tilbury cruise terminal.

That's the place Marco Polo calls home and this is a great opportunity to get on board and see what low-cost British-style traditional cruising is all about.

There are three options, all available on Saturday October 30.

1. Look around the ship, see one of the shows and have a five-course lunch with wine for £29pp.

2. Go on board for evening cocktails, a five-course dinner with wine and a show, leaving at midnight, for £49pp.

3. Go for the evening event but pay an extra £20pp - so a total £69pp - and stay on board for the night and breakfast the next morning.

Having been to the Tilbury cruise terminal, I can think of many better places to spend the night but no matter. This is a good-value night out - certainly cheaper than any hotel you'll find.

To book your Marco Polo day or evening out, click here or call 0845 833 9798.

And don't forget you can see Cruise and Maritime Voyages - and many other cruise lines - this weekend at the Cruise Show at the NEC Birmingham. The doors open on Saturday and Sunday at 10am.

I'll see you there.

I've never quite understood this new-ish fad for learning to cook on a cruise.

Don't most people go on holiday to escape domestic chores such as cooking? And if not, isn't it because they don't know what a kitchen is because they live on M&S ready meals and other such healthy dishes? So why would they suddenly want to find out?

But understand it or not, cookery is the latest cruise ship must-do.

What's that? No surely it's not just because the cruise lines see a way to make money from it!

There are cooking demos on P&O Cruises and Yachts of Seabourn, P&O has classes that cost when Marco Pierre White is on board and Royal Caribbean International has just started cookery lessons on Liberty of the Seas that cost anything up to $125 per person.

Anton Mosimann is on a cruise on Silversea's Silver Cloud in January. Oceania Cruises, meanwhile, is installing a culinary centre (that's a posh word for kitchen) on new ship Marina, launching in January.

Holland America has always been into these culinary capers as well, and now reports it has signed BBC celebrity chef Valentine Warner to share his cookery skills on a Fjords and Highlands cruise on Eurodam next year. Demos will be free, classes will carry a charge.

Warner made his name on the BBC series What to eat now, all about the best food for autumn. Which naturally led to a what to eat in summer programme. Seems he never made spring and winter so not sure what you do then. Starve? Or go back to those ready meals?

The Eurodam cruise departs Dover on June 3 2011 for a 12-night voyage around Norway and Scotland. Prices from £1,129 per person.

Royal Caribbean's new Allure of the Seas will feature the first Starbucks at sea when it launches next month.

In the Royal Promenade, the glitzy "shopping street" that cuts right through the middle of the ship, it will have trained baristas serving signature coffees and food between 7am and 11pm daily.

So whether you want a really good espresso, cappuccino or Frappuccino, there's only one place to be. Well almost. Royal has been serving Seattle's Best Coffee for the past 10 years and that, if you can believe the name, must be quite good as well (as I don't drink the stuff I have no idea).

Royal says Starbucks' on-board prices will be "comparable to US pricing". Which doesn't tell me anything really.

But I'll let you know when I am on Allure next month.

If Celebrity can come up with the word Solsticize to describe the way some features from its acclaimed new Solstice-class ships are being put on its older vessels, I make no apology for using "Cunardifies" to describe changes MSC Cruises is making for its Yacht Club passengers.

These are the folk with deep pockets who pay extra to be in a private suite complex - the Yacht Club - away from the hoi-poloi.

The feature is on MSC Fantasia and MSC Spendida and will be on the new MSC Fantastica, launching in 2012.

From this month, not only can the "Yachties" relax by their own pool, away from the masses, and enjoy free drinks in their private bar, but they are also to be given exclusive access to the ships' speciality restaurants - L'Etoile on MSC Fantasia and L'Olivo on MSC Splendida.

All much the same as the way Princess Grills and Queens Grills passengers on Cunard's ships get their own exclusive eponymous dining rooms.

Where Cunard operates a bizarre hybrid system whereby Grills passengers are allocated a table for the duration of their cruise but can eat when they want, MSC Yacht Club passengers will enjoy open seating, dining when and with whom they want.

It's an interesting move, great for the Yacht Club folk but dramatically cutting down choice for the rest of the passengers.

And this in a day and age when cruise lines are trying to add more speciality restaurants, not only to give passengers more choice but also because they have a cover charge so are nice little earners.

One of the questions I was going to ask Adam Goldstein, president and CEO of Royal Caribbean International, when I'm on Allure of the Seas in a couple of weeks was whether they would be adding features from the new ship to other vessels in the fleet.

Never mind waiting to be on Allure, I already know the answer.

In a refit next year, Radiance of the Seas is to be made more Alluring, with a new Brazilian steakhouse and Mexican-themed Rita's Cantina, two new dining outlets making their debut on Royal's new big ship.

The ship is also getting a new Italian restaurant, Giovanni's Table, a Park Café deli-style diner, a Chef's Table, which is an exclusive dining experience for a handful of people, and a nursery for babes and toddlers.

All these things debuted on Oasis of the Seas when it launched last year.

There's no indication where the new Italian and churrascuria dining outlets will be but my guess is they are replacing the ship's Chops Grill and Portofino speciality restaurants. Not sure where they could put the Mexican though - maybe in a section of the Windjammer self-service.

With no new ships on the order books, Royal is clearly turning its attention to upgrading existing tonnage.

* The cabins on Radiance of the Seas are also to be with fitted flat-screen TVs in all cabins (have to say I am surprised they are not already), there'll be a new Diamond Lounge for Crown and Anchor loyalty members and wi-fi throughout the ship.

* Splendour of the Seas is to get two new speciality restaurants (presumably the churrascuria and Giovanni's Table), the babes and toddlers nursery, flat-screen TVs in the cabins, the Diamond Lounge and wi-fi throughout the ship. They will also be adding more balcony cabins and refreshing the Windjammer self-service.

* On Oasis of the Seas, the Mondo Café in the Royal Promenade is to make way for a Starbucks, which makes debuting at sea on Allure of the Seas.

On sea as on land, the coffee giant is taking over!

Thirteen days after leaving Finland, the world's newest, biggest cruise ship, Allure of the Seas, has arrived in Fort Lauderdale, in Florida.

This monster weighs in at 225,282 tonnes, holds 6,200 passengers when full and would dwarf the One Canada Square building at London's Canary Wharf if stood upright.

I've been keeping an eye on Captain Hernan Zini's daily reports from the bridge on the Allure website and they've had a great crossing, managing to avoid Hurricane Tomas and open all the venues en route as planned.

The last was the Dog House, serving sausages from around the world. Captain Zini revealed he is always being thrown in the dog house by his wife but admitted this is one he will be happy to spend time in.

I'm right with you Captain. It'll be my first stop when I go on board in just over a week. Or maybe that'll be Rita's Cantina. Or both. But I have to leave room for the churrascuria. I'm determined to try that.

Now Allure has arrived in warmer climes, it's time for the landscapers to move in and get Central Park planted up - they've got about 12,000 real plants to bed - and then the pre-inaugural activities start.

The naming ceremony is on November 28 - they are not revealing the godmother until the ceremony starts - and the first revenue cruise, a four-night mini-voyage, departs on December 1.

Isn't life strange? One minute cruise ships are handing over food and water to the people of St Lucia whose homes were ravaged by Hurricane Tomas.

The next, the US Navy is handing out food to a cruise ship - Carnival Splendor - stranded in the Pacific due to an engine fire.

Holland America Line's Noordam, which called at St Lucia this week, donated 45,000 gallons of drinking water, 15,000 pounds of chicken, beef, rice, sugar, oil and vegetables and more, and over $3,300 that had been donated by passengers.

Holland America, coincidentally a sister cruise line to Carnival - also invited 19 orphans on board to eat cookies and pizza, swim in the pool and learn how to make fajitas.

The day before, P&O Cruises' Oceana was in St Lucia - the first ship to arrive after the hurricane swept through - and donated two pallets of mineral water, biscuits, mattresses and furniture.

Given the severe devastation to the island's agriculture and crops, it'll be some time before St Lucia can claim a happy ending but hopefully things can start to get better.

Happily that's not the case for the Carnival Splendor, which arrived in San Diego on Thursday afternoon under tug power.

The passengers are now on their way home, which must be a relief given the conditions on board described by eyewitness David Zembrano.

He said the folk in inside cabins had to keep their doors open all the time - even at night - to get some air and light, while those with rooms on the lowest deck had to trudge up to the public toilets on deck three because theirs didn't work.

He also revealed that 30 pieces of luggage were dropped into the water before the ship sailed, leaving many people with no change of clothes. An unlucky cruise or what?

Now the passengers are off, their main hardship is having to adapt to living in a world where every meal is not a Spam sandwich. I wish them luck!

I was intending to make the Dog House, serving hotdogs from around the world, my first stop as soon as I embarked Royal Caribbean's new Allure of the Seas, but like all good plans, it changed.

I ended up having lunch in Rita's Cantina, the new Mexican diner on the Boardwalk, mainly because Katie, who is here to try to make sure the British media behave, had been patiently waiting to grab us a table for 30 minutes.

When news came that she had secured one, myself and four other journalist mates raced there thinking if it was that busy, we might not get another chance. Only to find that while she did have a table, half the others were empty anyway.

My initial reaction was that they were struggling to cope with serving even a half-empty house, an impression heightened by the time it took for our order to be taken and the food to arrive.

Thank goodness they didn't try to do the song-and-dance routine I saw them practicing on this video, or I'd have still been there instead of writing this blog.

In fairness, it's a new team of waiters, working in a new restaurant, so of course it will take time for things to come together. I just hope they manage it in time for the first revenue sailing on December 1.

Happily everything was worth waiting for. The Patron Perfect Margaritas were good and while the food could have been hotter - my fajitas definitely lacked the promised sizzle - it was tasty, and served with plenty of spicy sauces to give it extra zing.

It costs an extra $7.95 per person, excluding drinks, to eat at Rita's and I reckon as long as you go with plenty of patience, it's a price worth paying.

In Qsine, the speciality restaurant on Celebrity Cruises' Celebrity Eclipse, you order your food on an iPad. And now the same touch-screen technology has moved in at Vintages, the classy wine bar on Royal Caribbean's new Allure of the Seas.

It's all clever stuff. They link an iPad to your on-board account as you arrive and away you go. There are 47 different wines to choose from, listed with notes from the winemakers, on-board sommeliers or both, so it saves having to train wine waiters, and you can have a glass, or half or whole bottle.

Your order goes through to your waiter's PDA and he or she serves the wine to the table - see, they can't manage without people completely, or at least not yet.

If you fancy some tapas-style nibbles, you also order them with the iPad. The one I saw wasn't fully set up on the food side but it showed three "packages", made up of things like salami, olives, garlic bread and prawns, that cost from $8 to $13.

The cheapest wine, by the way, is a very reasonable $28 a bottle, but they didn't tell me the most expensive (unlike on a paper menu I couldn't just scan the price list to find out!).

Frank Weber, in charge of food and beverages on Allure of the Seas, told me phase two of the iPad revolution will be to have a "wine assistant" who will suggest wines based on what you fancy, be it a dry red or a fruity white.

And then the long-term plan is to roll-out the iPads to other Royal Caribbean ships once they have had a chance to see it works.

If you like meat, you'll love the Samba Grill, the Brazilian steakhouse, or churrascaria, that has debuted on Royal Caribbean International's new Allure of the Seas.

Gauchos, well waiters dressed like gauchos (South American cowboys, if you're wondering), come around to the table with meat on huge skewers and carve pieces off for you.

Once you switch on the green light, service starts. And it's fast. I hadn't even managed to pick up my knife and fork to try the first bits of beef before a second gaucho appeared, brandishing a different cut of beef. And then another gaucho came with chicken wrapped in bacon.

It was time to switch on the red light to show we were taking a break. But as soon as we had cleared what was on out plates, we went to green again.

So then came sausages, lamb, a top up of fries and fried plantains. There are nine different meats but I'm afraid we gave up at that point.

The food was very tasty and well worth the $25 per person cover charge (but I'm not convinced many veggies will take up the $15 option given this is such a meat fest), but they seriously need to do something about the atmosphere. Or rather lack of it.

I had expected a live band, South American rhythms and colourful dancers. What we got was one scantilly-clad young lady who managed to keep smiling while the rest of us - and the place was less than half-full - managed a rather embarassed applause every now and then.

It has to get better if it's going to succeed.

Fred Olsen is offering a new dining option from January - but not quite the takeaway service fellow blogger Captain Greybeard wrote about.

Rather, they will be giving anyone who wants an escape from the main dining room the option to have a four-course evening meal served in their cabin.

Currently called "Nights in with Fred", although thankfully this is due to change, the concept is being trialled on Balmoral and Black Watch, on cruises of more than 21 days, and will be rolled out across the fleet if it is successful.

The "night in" menu will be more extensive than is currently available from room service - Thai, Indian, Chinese, Spanish, French, Mexican and English pub food has been mentioned - and includes wine. The in-cabin dining will be free; you'll have to pay for wine, as usual.

Fred reckons it will appeal to people who have spent a long day ashore and want a quiet evening in their cabin watching a DVD or have an early start the next day.

I reckon it will appeal to people on long cruises who want a break from sitting with the same people at the same table night after night.

I've always thought the glass-blowing workshop on the lawn on Celebrity Cruises' Solstice-class ships was the weakest feature on what are otherwise pretty faultless vessels.

You've got this lawn on a cruise ship. Incredible. And what can you do? Something that is one step up from watching paint dry, certainly after the first time you've seen it.

It seems Celebrity finally agrees with me.

On their next new ship, Celebrity Silhouette, launching next July, the gaffers (the name for people who blow glass) are being blown out and replaced by a couple of new places to eat, an art studio, eight cabanas, hammocks and a couple of these funky Adirondack chairs.

That's more like it.

The Lawn Club Grill will have hands-on cooking lessons with the chef (pizzas and the like) at lunchtime and grill-your-own dinners (or you can get the chef to do it) in the evening.

The Patio, below, will be open for breakfast and lunch, a nice casual area with views of the lawn and of the sea.

There'll be painting, mixology and other classes in The Art Studio, and wi-fi and picnic baskets for the folk in the cabanas.

The changes will also be on Celebrity Reflection, the fifth and last Solstice-class ship on order, which is due out in November 2012.

The Lawn Club is not the only thing changing on both ships.

* Michael's Club will be serving more than 50 beers and holding classes on how to pick the right beer glass and pout the perfect pint.

* The Hideaway, a new hi-tech area where you can curl up with your Apple goodies, replaces the Team Earth environmental awareness exhibition.

* Celebrity Silhouette is to get 17 more cabins - six in Concierge Class, eight with an ocean view and three insides, giving it 1,443 vs 1,426 on the other Solstice-class ships.

* Celebrity Reflection is to get a whole extra accommodation deck. It'll have 34 big new AquaClass suites, eight Sky Suites, 19 Concierge-class balcony cabins and 11 inside rooms, giving it a total 1,515 cabins.

To cope with the capacity increase - 3,030 passengers based on double occupancy vs 2,850 on Silhouette's already-launched sister ships - there'll be more loungers around the pool and more seats in the theatre, self-service and dining outlets.

Celebrity Reflection will also weigh an extra 4,000 tons and be one metre wider.

It's been three whirlwind weeks since I got back from my cruise on Voyages to Antiquity's 378-passenger Aegean Odyssey.

During the cruise I posted blogs about our calls at Syria and Lebanon, which were fabulous despite the poor guide in Syria, so it's well past time to give you a few thoughts about the ship.

I had a lovely spacious cabin with a walk-in wardrobe and big bathroom - bath, shower and, amazingly, a toilet that flushed rather than vacuumed - and a generous supply of quality shampoos, conditioners, lotions and shower gel.

The bed was comfy, there was a small balcony and Cidi, my room steward, was charming, but the room was very spartan, as indeed is much of the rest of the ship (the pic to the right is the reception).

There were no pictures on the wall, very little furniture but one morning, while lying in bed, I did spot a TV on the wall opposite.

I say "spot" because it was so small relative to the size of the room and the distance from the bed, I hadn't noticed it before. And other than on the bed, there was nowhere to sit and watch it, which rendered it rather useless. It was anyway; apparently none of the TVs were getting a signal.

Mine was the last cruise of the 2010 season - the key thing that sets VtoA apart from the competition is that they cruise in the Eastern Mediterranean only and are sensible enough not to try cruising there in winter.

That means a) there is no chance of hitting bad weather and b) they have time to put the ship in dry-dock so any problems can be ironed out.

As a priority, they need to get the smoke stack sorted. Ever since they launched in May 2010, passengers have been complaining about soot falling from the stack, but they have been unable to get the problem fixed.

Just look at this picture of Aegean Odyssey arriving into Beirut, belching smoke and with a blackened stack. No wonder a lot of the loungers on the top deck were spotted with soot. Just unfortunate they chose white seat covers!

VtoA also desperately needs to install wi-fi. I am told they are putting it in during the dry-dock, but seriously wonder why it wasn't installed during the initial major refit given the type of people they want to attract.

Namely highly-educated folk aged 55-plus who travel with laptops and want to keep in touch on-line.

If I'd had £1 for every passenger who came up to me in the hotel we stayed in overnight in Palmyra who wished they had also brought their laptop when they saw I was on-line on mine, I could have covered the cost of my air fare.

Well maybe not, but you get the idea.

There is an internet café on the ship, and the satellite signal was excellent, but its six terminals were in constant use. I do hope they can do something about the deafening air-conditioning in there.

But more importantly they need to address the poor food and sloppy service, which was commented on by many passengers I spoke to, both Brits and Americans, some hardened cruisers, others trying a holiday at sea for the first time.

Service howlers included seating me without a menu, forgetting to take my order, giving me a wine glass but having to be asked again to pour wine in it (free wine with dinner is one of their selling points, but you have to constantly ask for it), having to wait 20 minutes for service in an almost-empty bar.

The good news is that all things that can easily be put right (the smoke stack might not be easy, but I'm sure it can be fixed). A change of catering company, more training for the crew, wi-fi and some decoration on the walls.

The people I spoke to who were disappointed with the ship loved the destinations and shore excursions, and want to cruise again with VtoA because of the interesting places they visit.

I'm with them. I'd certainly cruise with them again for the destinations.

I just hope the powers that be spend the money necessary to make sure that when we do all go back, we can sit outside without getting covered in soot and enjoy a drink that's been served promptly while discussing how fabulous the food and crew are.

I'm flying out to Orlando today, for the naming ceremony of the Disney Dream, without doubt the most exciting cruise ship launching this year.

It all happens at Florida's Cape Canaveral on Wednesday morning US time, after which we're sailing to Castaway Cay, Disney's private island in the Bahamas for a spot of sun, sand and sea.

There's no word as yet on the godmother. Cruise lines increasingly like to keep these things under wraps until the last moment. I'll just say that in 1999, Disney Wonder was named by Tinkerbell, so anything can happen (well it is Disney, you know).

Disney Dream is two decks taller than Disney Magic and Disney Wonder, and holds up to 4,000 people when full - that's nearly 700 more than each of the other two ships.

It is also jam-packed with fun cruise ship firsts. I can't wait to try the AquaDuck water-coaster, below, and have a chat with Crush, the turtle in Finding Nemo, who will be popping up in the kids club to have real-time conversations with the children. And me!

Actually he is also stars in Animator's Palate, one of three dining rooms, talking to the diners during the meal while swimming around in his tank

There's art that comes alive when you get near, those clever inside cabins with virtual portholes and restaurants that change vistas between day and evening.

I'll also be checking out the District, a huge adults-only area with a Champagne bar, nightclub and Skyline, a cocktail bar with changing cityscapes.

Internet willing, I'll be posting thoughts and reports on the blog so be sure to keep in touch.

I looked very carefully at the date when I saw this.

On four cruises this year, Costa Cruises' frequent passengers can become crew for a day under a new initiative called ViceVersa.

They'll be given a uniform with a ViceVersa logo and work, under supervision, in guest services or as tour escorts, cruise staff, musicians, singers, waiters or cooks.

General mayhem, not to mention health and safety issues, springs to mind, but apparently it is true.

Costa tells me there is no limit to the number of people who can sign up for the scheme, and there is also no charge.

You don't get a refund for doing all the work either, mind, and I'm guessing you can forget a share of the tips!

If you always though ultra-luxury cruising was out of your league, think again. There are some amazing six-star offers around right now that make top-end cruise lines uber-affordable.

Crystal Cruises (020 7287 9040) has cut fares on its autumn cruises, so prices now start from an incredible £2,249 per person.

That's for a seven-night Mexican Riviera (great place, just don't mention Top Gear!) cruise on November 20 or 27 and - here's the best bit - it includes free return flights, soft drinks including water, gratuities and $500 per person on-board spending money that can be used to buy alcoholic drinks, in the spa, on shore excursions. In fact whatever you want.

(Maybe that's why the promotion is called All Inclusive-As You Wish - Ed?)

Crystal has autumn cruises in and around the Mediterranean, along the east coast of the North America, visiting New England and Canada, in the Caribbean and the Mexican Riviera, so there's bound to be a cruise and price to suit.

Many of Crystal's cruises come with $1,000 per person on-board cruise credit and new for 2011, they are offering open dining so you can eat when you want.

As I am no fan of fixed dining, that's especially great news but want my advice? Try the Asian and Italian speciality restaurants. They are the best and all they ask in payment is a suggested $7 per person gratuity.

It's a bargain. And with all that cruise credit, it won't actually cost you anything anyway!

Silversea has extended its onboard credit, offering $1,000 per couple to another 25 cruises in Northern Europe and the Med, and $500 per couple to 38 voyages worldwide. To qualify, you need to book by June 30 2011.

Windstar (020 7292 2369) isn't quite in the six-star league, but it's a top-end brand and it has a great onboard credit offer so I reckon it deserves to be listed here.

They are offering up to $1,000 per couple onboard credit on selected 2011 European voyages on their three ships - Wind Surf, Wind Star and Wind Spirit - booked by March 15 2011.

The amount is determined by the cabin category. Book a B or A level cabin and you'll get $600 per couple, book a suite (Wind Surf only) and you'll get $1,000 per couple.

I've only cruised on Wind Surf, their biggest ship, and I had a ball. Good food, fabulous service and nice other passengers. You can read about it here.

Windstar's 2011 European cruises cost from £1,603 per person cruise-only. That's for a  five-night voyage from Cannes to May onboard Wind Surf departing May 30.

I'll be heading off to Heathrow shortly, to catch a flight to Miami, where Oceania's new ship Marina is being named tomorrow by Mary Hart, presenter of US TV's Entertainment Tonight.

I'm promised a gala ceremony and a 15-litre Nebuchadnezzar of Champagne, custom-made by Armand de Brignac, has been lined up, ready to smash against the hull.

Then it's all aboard for a mini cruise to Nassau in the Bahamas so I can get a real feel for the ship - its facilities, crew and food.

I've only ever visited Oceania's ships while they are on a turnaround day in Dover, so I'm looking forward to finding out if they are as good as the company claims (call me a cynic, but I never quite trust the cruise lines' judgement of their product!).

Marina is quite a step up for Oceania, as it's twice as big as their three other ships. Nautica, Regatta and Insignia each holds 684 passengers (all three are former Renaissance Cruises ships and therefore sisters of the Azamara duo and Princess Cruises' Royal, Pacific and Ocean Pri