Cruise Lines

Interesting letter in Travel Weekly this week about gratuities, which always manage to raise a few heckles among the British cruising fraternity. Why? Well as the letter says, a tip is supposed to a reward for good service. Ah yes. But not where cruising is concerned.

On a cruise, the gratuity is an extra cost dressed up as a tip to save cruise lines having to pay crew higher wages, which they don't want to do as it would mean having to charge more for the cruise itself.

How else can you explain the fact that Royal Caribbean International allows passengers to pre-pay their gratuity? So you are rewarding service before you have even stepped onto a ship. Make sense of that. Or that Costa Cruises and Norwegian Cruise Line have replaced gratuities with compulsory service charges?

Other lines automatically add the gratuity to your on-board account and you can ask for it to be taken off or for the amount to be reduced, but it takes a hard person to dare look so mean.

Cruise lines argue that putting the tip on the bill is for passengers own good. Saves them having to find lots of extra cash at the end of a holiday - and it is a lot. From about £30 per person per week, which is £120 if you are travelling with the family. So they have a point.

But it would be a stronger point if they asked when passengers check in,"would you like us to add the £5 a day gratuity to your cruise account?" - and then explain the reasons. I suspect there is the likelihood too many would say no, which is not what the cruise lines want.

I have heard a prominent cruise line CEO say he would love to remove gratuities and pay crew more (OK, not his exact words, but it's what he meant) if other lines did the same, but he wasn't going to put himself at a competitive disadvantage. Understandable.

The big question is why the Brits - and the Spanish also, I am told - dislike tipping so much. Cruise lines say we are mean, embarrassed, not sure how much to tip (which is why they tell us).

I think it's more that we dislike being told what to do. Get the Brits on a package holiday and they will follow their tour leader over a cliff, but when it comes to money they want to think for themselves, tip because they want to, because they feel have had good service.

There is also something not quite fair - or British! - about going up to a bar to get a drink and having to tip for the pleasure.

There are ways to escape tipping. It's not the done thing on a luxury line - affluent cruisers don't want to be troubled by anything so common as money! - but then you pay a lot for the privilege.

At the other end of the scale, cruise lines like Island Cruises, Ocean Village and Thomson Cruises, aimed squarely at the Brits, have got it right by taking tipping out the equation.But I bet many passengers also leave something for their cabin steward/ess or favourite barman as a genuine thank you. It would be interesting to find out.

Regent Seven Seas Cruises president Mark Conroy reckons world cruising is becoming more popular because people are simply taking their offices globetrotting as well.

Regent now has Wi Fi on all its ships so guests can now work whilst on a long voyage. This allows access to the rest of the world at their convenience. Regent Seven Seas Society Silver and above members are offered complementary Wi Fi so they can communicate via the internet for as long as they please with no extra charge.

 

Work your way around the world - but without the backpack. What a fantastic concept. No wonder Conroy also reports that world cruising is a growing sector of Regent's market - so much so that they are offering more long voyages in 2009 to meet demand.

Other interesting world cruise facts from Regent:

* 20% of Regent's world cruise bookings come from the UK.

* 70% of world cruisers are repeat customers.

* a 116-night all-inclusive world cruise with six-star Regent (with all drinks, alternative dining and tips covered) costs less than a 105-night non-inclusive cruise (non of the above covered) on Cunard's five-star Queen Victoria - £291 per person per day against £296.

Who says they can't afford luxury?

Airline cutbacks in response to the soaring price of fuel is causing major headaches for US cruisers, a USA Today Cruise Log Blog reports.

The soaring price of oil has forced airlines to make some drastic moves in recent weeks, including cutting back service, raising fares and adding new baggage fees. And that's causing major headaches for cruisers who rely on airplanes to get to ships.

Be interesting to hear if agents over here are finding similar problems. Another good reason to cruise from the UK, I think.

Not only was there a free excursion for everyone on the ship during my voyage - it's called an Exclusively Seabourn event and there's one per cruise (ours was into the Sicilian countryside, to taste olive oil and wine) - but a welcoming committee of crew for when you get back.

True, this costs a lot on paper, but it can work out cheaper than lesser-starred cruiselines when you take into account the fact that all drinks and gratuities are included ... and that includes in the spa, where you pay the cost of the treatment and that's it.

Even more impressive, after a lovely massage this morning, I didn't have to fend off the usual hard sell for anti-ageing, anti-stress or anti-anything-else products that I neither need not want.

It's not all rosy in the Seabourn garden though. I've got a lovely big shower but the actual shower head is so far in one corner I can't actually get under it, and my so-called French balcony is big enough to stand on...Just. And hit bad weather in one of these tiny 8,000-ton yachts, as we did last night, and you know all about it - at least I and many of the other passengers did.

But all these negatives are why Seabourn is building bigger ships. Will it ruin the Seabourn style, where I exit my cabin to be greeted by name by my stewardess, not just as ma'am.

Let's hope not, or we'll all just have to keep taking the pills - literally!

My stint on Swan Hellenic's Minerva is just about to end, mainly due to other commitments and partly because the guys in head office were concerned that if I stayed on to Kirkwall and we hit bad weather, the ship would not be able to get in to the port.

Result? Minerva would head off to Norway - it's next stop after Scotland - with me on board when I was supposed to be elsewhere.

But they hadn't factored in Captain John Moulds. "I'd have got you in," he told me over dinner yesterday evening, after telling me that bad weather is no obstacle for him when it comes to landing passengers in Antarctica - the most unfriendly climate in the world.

Somehow I really think he would.

Interesting e-mail from Joe in response to my column a couple of weeks ago in the Telegraph looking at whether the cruising bubble can continue in view of the credit crunch and ever-rising fuel surcharges.

Swan Hellenic are now writing to passengers who are sailing in 2009, promising no surcharges if they pay in full by July 2008. They state possible surcharge figures of £20+ a day.......

Clever how the surcharge has become a tool to get clients to book and pay for their cruises asap. Clouds and silver linings spring to mind.

What a difference an upgrade makes. This is a standard cabin on Viking River Cruises' Viking Surkov. See where the pole is? That's where the wall of the cabin used to be.

During last winter's upgrade, two standard cabins were knocked into one to at least give some space to swing a cat. The bathrooms were enlarged so there is now a separate sink and shower.

At the same time, two deluxe cabins have been made into three. Which no doubt explains why I also have a pole. I did wonder. Even more odd, I have a door that opens into a wall. A bit alarming when you forget....

Mine is a deluxe cabin, but quite compact, and I managed to cause upset in the Viking family by saying I found the décor a bit drab. Heavy brown curtains combined with dark bedspread (it did help to keep the net curtains open to let in the light, but meant passing passengers also got a clear view in).

"You find it drab because you are too young for this cruise," I was told.

As I had preceeded my Viking Russian river cruise with a stint on Swan Hellenic (average age 70) I'm getting used to being told I'm too young.

It's quite flattering really, but suggests a) that river cruising is only for oldies and b) that oldies only like drab. I don't buy either.

So full marks to Victoria Kennedy, the hotel and entertainment manager on Swan for livening up the cabins with white curtains with coloured flag motifs and a matching bed runner. As my cabin was small with only a small window to let in the light, it was a welcome bit of cheer, appreciated even by the oldies.

Fred Olsen Cruise Lines' tours manager Tim Moore has sent me details of CareVacations, set up by Canadians Don and Susan, who saw an opportunity to open a business renting "special equipment" - oxygen, respiratory products, scooters, wheelchairs, walkers and the like - to cruise passengers.

Apparently the idea has gone down a storm in the US, where they are preferred supplier to all the major cruiselines, so now they have set up over here, shipping equipment to European cruisers.

In the States it's quite a common sight to see a person with portable oxygen shopping ... on cruise ships. They are not prepared to be confined to their homes, and neither should Europeans. Someone with impaired mobility may have their own equipment but it may be too large and too heavy for use on cruise ships. Renting lightweight equipment that is compliant with cruise lines' requirements, from CareVacations Ltd., is the answer.

Well they would say that, wouldn't they, but have to admit this sounds a clever idea. Wheelchair prices start at £99 for a week's cruise, £150 for a month, but you can pay £225 for an intriguingly-named newlife quiet concentrator.

Imagine if you could book these through your travel agent at the same time as your cruise? Just a thought...

Will people pay more to cruise on the giant 220,000-ton Oasis of the Seas just because it's got a Central Park, Boardwalk and all sorts of other amazing features?

Royal Caribbean's chairman and CEO Richard Fain has said it will carry a premium, cruise blogger Anne Campbell questions whether that is realistic when fuel prices are escalating, airlines are taking planes out of the air and experts are determined to talk us into a recession.

http://www.cybercruises.com/cruisecolumn_july7.htm

Of course, Oasis is not due out for another 18 months - the maiden voyage is December 12 2009 - by which time the economy might be on the mend. The question surely is, even if they can afford it, will people buy the principal of paying a premium for a big ship with lots of features?

My thoughts go to the many conversations I've had with passengers resistent to paying $15 or $20 each to dine in a speciality restaurant because food on a cruise is "supposed" to be included in the price and this paying lark is the cruise lines trying to "nickle and dime you".

The classic has to be the man who wrote in response to a piece I wrote in the Telegraph about Gary Rhodes' restaurant on P&O Cruises' Arcadia, saying the food was so bad he wasn't going to pay extra money to try it! I paraphrase, but you get the drift.

If anyone has any thoughts on Oasis and paying extra, I'd love to hear them. 

I have been picking up a few useful pointers on P&O Cruises' Ventura from Phil at the Cruise Village/Save 'n' Sail as he was on the ship in June and I am on later this month. Ventura, for those who have already forgotten, was launched in April and is the biggest in the P&O fleet, with lots of new-for-P&O stuff on board.

http://www.mycruiseblog.co.uk/

It all sounds pretty good, although he reckons the cover charge in The White Room is too high given the limited choice on the menu. I'll reserve comment on that issue, but I was surprised at the launch to discover that they have gone for flexible pricing in the speciality restaurants so people on shorter cruises pay more. I struggle to see how that can be justified, other than to the bean counters.

But what interested me most is his comment that Freedom dining is not working well because too many people book tables at their preferred sitting time each day so when radom diners turn up to eat, there is no room.

The turn-up-and-dine concept works very well on Princess Cruises (where it is called Anytime Dining) so I wonder what the problem is.

Could it simply be that Princess staff are more experienced at handling flexible dining because they've been doing it for so many years or because P&O people haven't got to grips with this idea of Freedom after so many years of being told when to eat and where to sit.

I just hope things are improving - and fast....

Catharine Hamm, a staffer on the Los Angeles Times, has a very tortuous style but finally manages to get around to answering a reader's travel dilemma. And it's a good response.

To book through a travel agent or not, that is the question.

Quoting Jay Rein, chief executive and president of US on-line travel agency Travelworm.com, she concludes that booking your cruise through an agent not only means you get the best choice of which line to choose, but also the best deals, whether that be upgrades of perks.

Hamm concludes:

If I set sail again, I'll use an agent, whether it's clicks or bricks, because, frankly, he or she (or it) will offer to help. And when was the last time anybody else in the travel industry bothered to do that?

Isn't it great to find someone on your side?

Thanks to Mike at Gill's Cruise for spotting the story about the Dorset couple hit with a fuel surcharge bill of £892 by Voyages of Discovery.

Multiply that up over the 700 or so passengers that Discovery holds and we are talking a nice little earner for Voyages.

No wonder they call the black stuff "liquid gold".

Travel Weekly US forecast that cuts were coming at Royal Caribbean International last week and now they have happened, according to a story on Travelmole.

It's a painful cut too - 400 shoreside jobs and the end of the Scholar Ship educational programme for college students to study abroad at sea - which is hoped to save $125 million a year.

CEO Richard Fain blamed soaring fuel costs, which are eroding too much of the line's profitability.

Bet the money men are rueing the day they placed an order to build the world's biggest cruiseship, especially with launch less than 18 months away.

A report in Travel Weekly US suggests the chill wind of the economic downturn is starting to blow around the cruise lines.

Johanna Jainchill's report talks of downsizing staff and budget cuts at Royal Caribbean in response to rising fuel costs and says sources say the line wants to trim the payroll by 10%.

RCCL's vice-president of corporate communications Lynn Martenstein admitted they are under pressure to control costs.

Like most companies today, we are redoubling our efforts to find savings, but we have not announced any specific actions.

Hot on the heels of news that Susan Hooper, managing director EMEA, is resigning one can't help putting two and two together and coming up with, well,  four.

I feel a definite reorganisation in the air.

The last day of my cruise on Ventura and I'm black and blue after finally plucking up courage to have a go on the bungee trampoline.

I thought it was just a matter of bouncing up and down with bungees attached, but it's exhausting and my arms feel like they've been pulled from their sockets.

Great fun though!

Anyway, I can tell we're nearing old Blighty because it's raining, the fog horn has been blaring and suitcases have started to appear in the corridors. And we're still on the Bay of Biscay!

We have opted for what P&O Cruises rather oddly calls "self-help" disembarkation, which basically means we get off with our own luggage tomorrow morning.

That means there's no rush to get packed and, more to the point, we don't have to kick our heels around the ship tomorrow morning, with 3,000 other people also kicking their heels, waiting for the grey ticket we were originally given to be called at 10.15am, after having been asked to vacate our cabin at 8am.

I do understand they have to clean the cabins before the next passengers arrive, but out by 8am is a bit of an end-of-holiday shocker, especially as most people have only been staggering up to breakfast these last few days at sea at 10am.

But it's a shame that none of the lines has managed to come up with a more civilised way to get rid of the passengers who've paid so they can get the next lot on to spend, spend, spend. 

Interesting comments this week on cruise.co.uk about the benefits or otherwise of dine-when-you-want options on cruise ships.

Is it working well? Tsang didn't think so after her experiences on P&O Cruises' Ventura and I have to agree, after a week on board, that the staff are struggling with the concept.

So many people are booking that half the dining room is blocked out for the evening, which means if you do get a table the room is often half empty. But passengers are still turning up at the door and being turned away. "I guess we should book as well, but it kind-of loses the point of being Freedom," one man on a neighbouring table told me a couple of nights ago.

One of the problems is that the ship is packed with families who want Freedom dining, but two out of the three dining rooms are set aside for fixed dining. It wasn't always like that. When the ship launched, two out of three were set aside for Freedom dining, but the older - I'm guessing - passengers on the maiden voyages wanted fixed, so it was switched around.

And no one thought to change again when the passenger profile changed.

One evening my partner and I eventually ended up sharing a table for 10 with, um, two other people. We did look very lonely, especially with empty tables around us. They said one couple they met had asked for Freedom dining and been told they couldn't have it; another couple requested fixed and, yes, you've guessed it. They were told they couldn't have it.

The dual system works for Princess Cruises so guess it's just early days for Ventura. Im sure they'll get it right - but sooner would be better if they want to stem the moans I've heard.

From October this year, P&O Cruises is banning smoking in all inside areas of Oceana, Ventura and adult-only Artemis. Smokers will still be able to light up on their cabin balconies and designated parts of the deck.

Not sure what that will do to the Exchange, the pub on Ventura, which is pretty empty at the best of times, either a) because it has no atmosphere, even with the band in there singing their hearts out or b) because you have to cut through the smoke to get in, which means it's a real no-go for non-smokers.

It also suffers from being way down on deck six, away from the fun lounges and bars.
 
Guess it could go either way.

Anyone cruising on Ventura post-October, let me know.

Delighted to see agents are getting behind my campaign for a better deal for singles through Cruisepricescompared.com, the deals at sea website just launched by Harley Van Straten.

Check out the Telegraph website and travel pages this weekend for more about singles and why cruising makes such a great holiday for lone travellers.

Who knows. We might just start to break down the walls of Jericho.

Delighted to see Cruiseprices is doing so well, by the way. Really seems to have taken off thanks to agents' support.

P&O Cruises has really fired up the nation's cruisers with its latest smoking policy if the comments that have been flooding into the Cruise.co.uk website are anything to go by.

As from October, smoking will be banned on all inside public areas on Ventura, Oceana and Artemis. Smokers will still be able to light up on selected areas of open deck and on their balconies.

Smokers are shouting "not fair"; non-smokers are rejoicing with a holier-than-thou attitude which has then also irritated the smokers....and so it goes round and round.

Having been in cabins just vacated by smokers. I am all for banning smoking in staterooms, and personally I don't like it when people smoke on the balcony next to mine, but otherwise I have to say I'm with the smokers on this one (and I write as an ex-smoker of many years now).

It seems very unfair not to provide a lounge/pub, call it what you will, where smokers can puff away in the company of like-minded puffers. Non-smokers don't have to go in and always have plenty of other lounge areas to ang out in so they can't really compain.

It's called let and let live - although that's probably not the best expression where cigarettes are concerned!

I reckon what really matters is that people who don't like smoke can get away from it (so I wonder therefore whether the balcony and open deck is the best place, given the wind carries smoke, the smell, etc, but guess time will tell).

easyCruise has bowed to popular demand and for 2009 will be including half-board accommodation and daily housekeeping in the price.

It's a far cry from the budget line Stelios set up, where everything was an extra once you had paid for your bed, but then he has had to backtrack on quite a lot - reopening inside cabins so passsengers have a window, cutting back on the orange, providing proper food on board, now including it in the price and cleaning cabins to boot. How very mainstream it has become.

Personally I find it reassuring that the bright young things he wants to attract want their rooms cleaned. Seven nights is a long time to wallow in your own muck, especially in Greece in high summer.

History doesn't relate whether sheets and towels will be changed over that time. I hope so. At least once - even if we are supposed to be environmentally friendly.

I remember a seven-night cruise in the Maldives many moons ago when neither was changed. They were so filthy could have walked off with us at the end of the week. I noticed the tour operator I booked with never offered the cruise again.

My cruise column on the Telegraph website this week touches on how expensive it is on board Fram. I compared it with Ventura, where you could get a 33cl bottle for £1.95, while here 40cl draft beer is more than £3.50. Not the end of the world but worth bearing in mind.

But the one thing that is really cheap is the internet - six hours for £20. And it works - as anyone reading my blogs will have realised.

I paid a hefty £40 for four hours on Ventura, which was all the more galling when ashore in Rome, Florence, et al, you could have an hour for one euro (about 80p). If you wanted longer the price came down!

Here in Greenland I haven't seen an internet café and if there was one I dread to think how much it would cost. Yesterday, ashore at our first big town (with tarmac roads, a supermarket and a pub), a bottle of beer was £6.

I hastened back to Fram!

I never really knew the correct time on Ventura. Reason? Every clock was wrong, some by five minutes, some by an hour, others by more still.

The problem was that passengers waiting by the lifts thought it a good joke to move the hands forwards or backwards. And yes, you could do that, I am reliably informed by someone close to me who shall remain nameless!

Not sure why the ones that were out of reach were so wrong.

But full marks to Hurtigruten. Fram, launched a year earlier has digital clocks on each deck that all show the correct time. Not so much fun, of course, but as my watch is invariably wrong at least I now know whether I am coming or going.

I see Ideal Cruising is selling a nine-night Canary Islands cruise from Barcelona on Norwegian Cruise Line's Norwegian Jade this winter for just £510 per person - and that includes return flights from Gatwick.

I appreciate that this will be NCL's first winter cruising in the Med and Atlantic so they are testing the waters, so to speak, but it's hard to believe anyone can be making anything from that giveaway price.

Except the customer, of course, who is getting an absolute steal - especially as they can bag an outside cabin for just £92 per person more.

It's for a cruise departing December 12, which just happens to be my favourite day of the year (and not because it's when Royal Caribbean's Oasis of the Seas is scheduled to set off on its maiden voyage) but is probably not a good time to try to get people thinking about a cruise given most minds are focused on turkey and tinsel.

Either that, or people are planning to escape the big day, in which case they won't want to be away just before as well.

Costa and MSC have made it work, so really there's no reason why NCL shouldn't - except, of course that the former appeal to the European market while NCL depends heavily on the Americans.

And why would Americans want to cruise over here in a warm-ish, if they're lucky, winter when they have sun, sea and sand on their Caribbean doorstep - and without forking out a fortune in airline fuel supplements.

Pre-Xmas blues or a deeper malaise? Only time will tell.

A report in Florida Today says sales for cruising remain strong in the US as Americans disillusioned with flying latch onto the idea of driving to a port to join a ship.

Terry Thornton, Carnival's vice president for marketing planning, said there is no end in sight for demand for Caribbean cruises, which the company bolsters through locating its ships at drive-to ports around the state of Florida. "The cruise industry is doing well because people are driving to their ports."

Many Brits have already discovered the joys of being able to pack the car and drive to Southampton, Dover or wherever to start their cruise. No airport security hassles, no delays. Just board the ship and you're on holiday.

The Passenger Shipping Association says a record 591,000 passengers cruised from the UK last year. As more people discover the benefits of sailing from the UK - and more ex-UK cruises are offered - that figure can only grow. I expect more records for 2008 and beyond.

My inbox is still being flooded by past passengers concerned about Discovery, the cruise ship operated by Voyages of Discovery, which has been suffering engine problems since March this year.

In a story I wrote for the Telegraph last week, managing director David Yellow admitted there had been problems but said they would be fixed by Friday (August 22).

A statement yesterday from Voyages of Discovery also seemed to show all was finally well with the ship - even if she was going a little slow!

'The MV Discovery is operating its published Baltic Explorer itinerary and is currently in Korsor, as scheduled. The vessel did transit the Kiel Canal yesterday (Monday 25 August) en route to Korsor. During its journey from Harwich to Korsor, MV Discovery averaged its planned speed of 14.5 knots and has made no changes to its designated ports of call.'

But I have also been sent a letter from one of the passengers on the cruise, received on boarding and signed by David Yellow, informing them a new part was delivered last week but the engineers have still not managed to fix the problem. Apparently another new part now needs to be manufactured.

This does mean Discovery will be operating on 3 engines during your cruise which is perfectly permissible and the ship can do so safely. However it does mean that Discovery will be operating at a slightly slower speed than when the itinerary was originally planned.

It might be permissible and safe, but the letter also says Discovery will be skipping Tallinn, which will be a great disappointment to many.

David Yellow told me the part delivered last week also had to be specially manufactured. If that hasn't worked, maybe it's time to either take the ship out of service until it is fixed or replace the current cruise programme with slow, short hops over to the continent, sold on the basis of being one engine short, until everything is up and running again.

Or maybe Voyages just needs to splash out on a new engine. Discovery is an old lady, does some sterling work each year in Antarctica and is obviously feeling a little tired.

Whichever option, it would be a lot fairer to the passengers.

Just as it was getting a real taste for flycruising, Fred Olsen Cruise Lines has more than halved its flycruise programme for the next two years.

Instead of enjoying the Med sun in Civitavecchia, the port for Rome, next summer, Braemar will be in Dover, cruising to the Norwegian fjords, the Baltic and the Med. And instead of living it up in Miami, when it goes back to the Caribbean for winter 2009/10, it will be based back in Barbados.

Boudicca's 2009/1010 Caribbean season has also been cancelled. Instead the ship will be operating an extended pre-Christmas selection of cruises out of Portsmouth before relocating all the way to Southampton, for cruises to the Canary Islands, Med and a mammoth 28-night voyage to the Caribbean.

Marketing director Nigel Lingard blames the changes on the rising costs of fuel - rather unfortunate timing as prices have started to fall, and why then put in a costly (in fuel at least) cruise to the Caribbean? - but reading between the lines I wonder if there isn't also a feeling at Fred that they were going too far too fast in their bid to widen their client base beyond their traditional 65-plus market.

With the dramatic increase in fuel prices we have taken the decision to offer a more cost effective programme. This also gives us the opportunity to further widen the choice of ex-UK cruises for our traditional clientele.

What better message for agents to take into Cruise Week than that cruising is cheaper than 10 years ago? Especially now that everyone is reportedly looking a little closer at the pennies.

According to P&O Cruises, a two-week cruise in an ocean-view cabin this summer would have cost £1,579 per person. Ten years ago it would have cost £2,520.

But there's more. P&O's managing director Nigel Esdale has been doing some tantalising number crunching.

"The cumulative inflation rate between May 1998 and May 2008 is 32% [Office of National Statistics], so if cruise holidays had increased accordingly, then our prices should be more than double those in this summer's brochure. In actual fact, this year's prices are more than £900 cheaper per person, almost £2,000 cheaper for a couple than 10 years ago."

Everyone loves a deal and no one wants to miss out on having a holiday - especially in the UK's wet new world of global warming. With bargains like that, cruises should be flying off the shelves next week.

Another week, another cruise, this time on Princess Cruises' Crown Princess in the Baltic. It's a bit of déjà vu really as this is the ship on which P&O Cruises' Ventura was modelled and on which I cruised in July. One or two rooms are in different places, the speciality restaurants are different, things are charged in dollars and this ship has Movies under the Stars, but otherwise it's a home from home.

Tomorrow's Movie under the Stars is Narnia, which my daughter Ilana has already decided we'll watch. At 9.30pm. In the Baltic. I fear a sudden heatwave is out of the question so I've already earmarked my blankets. Lots of them!

I was thrilled to discover that our Captain is Andy Proctor, who married me (to my husband, that is) on Grand Princess back in 2004. That was in the Baltic too, on a day at sea sailing between Copenhagen and Stockholm, so it's quite a nostalgic trip for Ilana and I. Wonder if he'll remember me...?

Voyages of Discovery has been in touch after an earlier blog and asked me to point out that Discovery's call to Tallinn was not pulled and that the ship did stop there yesterday, as scheduled.

The letter from managing director David Yellow to the passengers said that the itinerary in Tallinn had been changed - the ship was in port for a couple of hours less than originally scheduled - not that the Tallinn stop had been cancelled.

I'm delighted to hear that was the case and my thanks to them for putting me right.

As promised, an update on the Piazza entertainment on Princess Cruises' Crown Princess. Following juggling Daniel's departure, we've had quick-change artist Yulana Plotvinova and magician Alex Lodge.

I've yet to have seen the latter at work - he does his magic up close so it depends on him coming to your table - but the oohs and ahhs from other passengers were impressive.

Plotvinova is great. She walks into a curtained closet in one outfit and emerges at the other end in another, or wraps herself in a cloak, then whisks it off to reveal - yes, another outfit. I was standing right in front of her, trying to take pictures, but it's impossible because it all happens so fast. And no, I couldn't see how it is done.

These "street" entertainers are very clever. Gives the atrium - sorry, Piazza - life and a reason to hang out there, rather than just passing through to admire the décor and eat the sticky buns they offer for breakfast in the International Cafe!

I looked at them earlier and wondered who would eat such unhealthy food for breakfast - sugar, icing, you name it, they are covered in it. And then along came the Americans!

This guy is Daniel Hochsteiner, from Germany, one of a band of entertainers who juggles three or so times a day in the piazza on Princess Cruises' Crown Princess.

The piazza, but the way, is the ship's atrium by another name because it is a place where you can buy coffees, teas or something stronger, snack on salads, cookies or cakes from the International Cafe - free in the day, charged in the evening (I'm not entirely sure why as the daytime food is so much nicer) - or just meet others and watch the entertainers. Much like an Italian piazza.
 
Oh - and it's also one of the best places for us laptop junkies to pick up wireless internet, which is why I'm spending a lot of time there.

Daniel was getting off the ship just after I took this picture. He's been on for a week, juggling hoops and tennis rackets, and now he's off to do the same on another cruise ship.

Rest assured, I'll be back down there to see who takes his place.

Which I was.

The Penthouse on Crystal Serenity is lovely. There's a walk-in wardrobe, large bathroom with two sinks, jacuzzi bath and separate shower, equipped with a flat-screen TV, DVD and CD. And of course there is Mahir, my butler.

But interestingly the Penthouse I had on Princess Cruises' Crown Princess last week was bigger.

It had a long balcony with two balcony doors, two TVs, a DVD, a walk-in wardrobe and the bathroom was spilt into two. A toilet and sink in one room, a jacuzzi bath and shower in another.

We didn't have a butler, but we did have the lovely Elmar, who greeted us each day with a chirpy good morning and managed to keep the room tidy despite the best efforts of my 14-year-old daughter to do otherwise.

"Have you noticed they have the name of our suite [Aruba] instead of the number on the signs in the corridor?" she asked excitedly the first day we were on board. I had to admit I hadn't, but it did explain why I spend ages looking at the sign trying to work out which direction to walk to get to 412.

It wasn't there. And then I realised I was standing almost right in front of the room.

Sometimes you can feel really stupid.

Is this a sign of the [hard] times - 10 nights Celebrity Cruises' Celebrity Galaxy from £796 per person?

OK, it's for an inside cabin, but that's not even £80 a day for a brand that calls itself deluxe - less if you take out the cost of the return flight and transfers. Even the press release that announced the price admitted it was "out of this world".

Or does it just tell us that cruising the Med in the near depths of winter - this is for a November 14 departure - is really not that popular unless you happen to be Italian (Costa and MSC, which carry a majority of Italians, seem to be making it work for them).

What does this mean for Royal Caribbean and Norwegian Cruise Line, about to embark on their first winter seasons in the Med? Only time will tell.

I had to smile at the headlines this weekend about all those Brits "stranded" abroad when XL went under. Stranded? Were they in Tristan da Cunha or St Helena, thousands of miles from anywhere in the middle of the South Atlantic ocean?

No, they were in some of the world's top holiday hotspots - you know. Those places served by numerous charter and scheduled airlines, all crammed with hotels which, let's face it, would have had plenty of availability because the people coming out on holiday were not going to arrive. How did we ever build an empire?

But checking into a hotel for a night or two would have cost money they didn't want to spend. Far better to have an uncomfortable 24 hours or so milling around an airport with thousands of others.

The irony is that if XL had levied a higher fuel supplement which better covered the rising cost of oil - maybe just another £1 per client - it might not have collapsed. But then XL clients would have shouted "foul". Just as they are now. But now they are "stranded" and many have lost everything.

My thoughts turned to the cruiselines, which increased their fuel supplements almost weekly in the spring as the price of oil went through the roof.

It was not popular, and I'm sure all people who cruise hope they will eventually go away, but it's something to do with financial management and covering your costs I believe. And the cruisers who have coughed up are getting the holiday they planned rather than a two-night break at Gatwick or Tenerife South.

I asked someone on Swan Hellenic if the fuel supplement would put them off booking a cruise in the future. No, he said, because it was a tiny amount compared to what he was paying for the holiday anyway. The voice of reason.

The collapse of XL could lead to an increase in dynamically-packaged holidays, according to Nigel Lingard, Fred Olsen Cruise Lines marketing director.

He told the Association of National Tourist Office Representatives/Passenger Shipping Association conference in London yesterday that cruiselines will struggle to find enough capacity to get passengers to their ships next year as a result of XL's demise.

XL was used by some cruiselines so they will have to find other aircraft to charter. We all use charter airlines as we have to get 2,000-3,000 passengers to our ships at once for our flycruises, and without XL there will be a tightening of capacity.

Lingard also said the prices being quoted by charter carriers have gone up since XL collapse and forecast a shift to more longer ex-UK cruises, in fact exactly what Fred is doing, to avoid having to fly people.

There will be problems for all, but ironically it could lead to more opportunities for agent to dynamically package holidays for their clients, selling cruise only and adding flights and pre and post-cruise hotels stays.

The price of oil might have dropped to below $100 a barrel, but cruiselines have no plans to drop of fuel surcharges.

USA Today quotes a Royal Caribbean spokesperson:

We continue to see considerable volatility in fuel price movements around the world and believe it would be premature to lower the supplement at this time," the company said in a statement.

Carnival Corporation spokesman Tim Gallagher says the company has no plans to get rid of the fuel supplements because the pump prices that cruise lines pay haven't come down as quickly as oil prices.

Our fuel prices for the ships don't drop nearly as fast as oil does, but they sure seem to go up every time there is a spike.

Reminds me of electricity prices, gas prices, oh yes, tax, food.... 

There is something for everyone a cruise ship, Lynn Narraway, UK managing director of Carnival Cruise Lines and Holland America Lines, told the ANTOR/PSA conference in London yesterday.

For her eight year old it's the swimming pool (a little galling, Narraway admits, as a pool could be anywhere); for her 10-year-old it's being able to sign herself in and out of the kids' club because it makes her feel very grown up.

This summer a friend of hers took her three-year-old on P&O Cruises' Ventura, which you will all remember is famed for having Noddy and a fabulous play area for kids.

So what did he like best? Going up and down in the lift.

At the meeting at Royal Caribbean HQ yesterday, it emerged that the grass on Celebrity Solstice is sitting on a bed on clay and limestone rather than "dirt", as the Americans call soil, to disuade any crawly things from taking up residence and avoid problems with customs people worried about the ship-born diseases. It will survive on the nutrients watered into it.

After many months of searching and trialing - they even had a patch of grass in the car park at HQ in Miami - they decided on a grass from Austria, which is reckoned to be tough enough to withstand hot Caribbean sun, Mediterranean summers, salty air and being stomped on by thousands of feet.

It was transported in refrigerated lorries from Austria to the Meyer Werft shipyard in Papenburg, Germany. Eighteen hours from "harvest" to being laid.

"Ice rinks on a ship? Now that was easy," said Harri Kulovaara, Royal Caribbean's executive vice-president maritime.

Kulovaara also revealed that when Royal Caribbean built Song of America (now Thomson Destiny), in 1982, the designers reckoned it was as big as a cruise ship could go. It was 37,773 tons and held 1,450 passengers. Oasis of the Seas, launching next year, is 225,000 tons and will hold 5,400 passengers.

Just goes to show you should never say never.

All the talk at a meeting at Royal Caribbean HQ in Addlestone, Weybridge, yesterday was about the new ships - Celebrity Cruises' Celebrity Solstice and Royal Caribbean's Oasis of the Seas.

But this wasn't the usual stuff about Central Park, Boardwalks and zipwires, but rather a day for the techies to find out some behind-the-scenes stuff about these ships.

About the wonders of non-toxic silicon paint on the hull, for instance, how they will be using waste heat from the engines to heat water, how common rail diesel engines have been fitted as they are more efficient and reduce emissions, how air-conditioning and lighting is cleverer, so it uses less energy and so helps the environment.

The air-con changes mean there will be a 25%-30% improvement in energy efficiency (personally I would just turn it down - or is it up? - so passengers don't freeze, but maybe that's too simple) while lighting-related energy consumption will fall 40%.

We learned that Solstice has 500 square metres of solar panels, which will provide enough energy to power the passenger lifts - all the jokes about being stuck in the lift when the sun goes behind a cloud illustrates why they won't actually be used for that purpose!

We also learned that the pipes sticking out of the funnel on Oasis are telescopic, allowing them to disappear inside the funnel to allow the ship under low bridges.

True, you don't get that many bridges in the ocean, but without this cute mechanism the ship couldn't get out of the Baltic - it is being built in Finland - or into New York.

Cue more jokes .... but I'll leave you to work that one out for yourselves.

With no sign of an end to the dispute between Norwegian Cruise Line and Aker Yards over the building/cost of its 150,000-ton F3 ships, comes another misery for NCL.

Cyprus-based Louis Cruise Lines has failed to dot the i's and cross the t's in the purchase of Norwegian Dream. The sale was supposed to go through on Monday but Louis apparently decided against splashing out $218 million for the ship because the charter business it was planning for the vessel did not materialise.

As well as operating its own cruises, Louis charters ships to other lines, including Thomson Cruises. It's not so unlikely that one of those others - or indeed Thomson - has decided against increasing capacity at a time when people are concerned about their bank balances.

Louis is saying nothing; likewise NCL, which will be no surprise to anyone who has been following the F3 saga. Leaving everyone to speculate and rumour.

Star Cruises, which owns half of NCL has told brokers to put Norwegian Dream back on the market, but brokers reckon it's a terrible time to be selling a ship.

I don't know. I had a meeting Tuesday with the guys from Fred Olsen Cruise Lines and casually mentioned the ship sale had fallen through. "Don't tell Mr Olsen," came the urgent reply. New-to-Fred ship Balmoral used to be Norwegian Crown, so they obviouly fear he has a penchant for ex-NCL stock.

But what with Balmoral and the newly-stretched Braemar, the FO team feels they have more than enough extra capacity to fill for a while!

As a friend has just remarked apropos of the Island Cruises news.

No wonder Louis Cruises decided against buying Norwegian Dream. They probably intended to charter it to Thomson Cruises to replace the Emerald. But now Thomson is getting Island Escape it doesn't need another ship.

Sad to see that instead of positioning Carnival Liberty in Dover for the 2009 summer season, to operate a series of Baltic voyages, Carnival Cruise Lines has decided to leave the ship Stateside.

The line only launched its Baltic cruises this year, starting with the magnificent naming ceremony on Carnival Splendor and a most enjoyable three-night cruise to Amsterdam.

The official line is that the bosses fear continued economic uncertainty and high air costs will deter the Americans from flying to Europe. The same reason given for pulling Carnival Freedom's 2009 Mediterranean season earlier this year.

That could be true. But what about the Brits? We don't have to fly anywhere to get to Dover.

As I reported in the Telegraph recently, though, Carnival was selling next summer's 12-night Baltic cruises for £699 per person - less than £60 a day. Month ahead of sailing. It doesn't suggest the cruises have been flying off the shelves.

Any Brits booked on the cancelled Liberty cruises will get a full refund, but the UK team is also scouting around trying to find alternative voyages on another line in the Carnival group. Passengers can also rebook on Carnival Dream, the line's new big ship, due out of the yard in September and scheduled to operate a few Med cruises before going to the Caribbean.

Unless they are about to be cancelled as well.

P&O Cruises next new ship will be called Azura.

The keel for the vessel was laid today. The ship will be floated out in summer 2009 and delivered to P&O in spring 2010. That's barely 18 months for a 3,100-passenger cruise ship to grow from a lump of metal into a vessel setting off on its maiden voyage. I don't know how many keel-layings and new ships I've seen, but I still find it amazing.

I was among a small group of British journalists supposed to be at the keel-laying ceremony today at Fincantieri's Monfalcone shipyard in Trieste, Italy, but the event was called off last week because of the tragic death of a worker on the Ruby Princess.

Azura's first section laid weighs 650 tons and is made up of six pre-manufactured blocks ready-fitted with piping. In all, 50 sections and several interconnecting steel blocks will be used to build the ship.

There have been hints that Azura will not follow sister ship Ventura down the big-for-families route, but for now all speculation remains just that. The next news bulletin is on November 25.

With oil hitting $70 a barrel from its $150 summer high, cruise lines are starting to remove those dreaded supplements.

Carnival Corp was one of the first to announce it was axing surcharges across its brands on all new bookings made after October 31 for 2010 sailings.

Now Royal Caribbean has followed suit. Passengers booking a cruise with Royal Caribbean International, Celebrity Cruises or Azamara Cruises after November 10, for a holiday departing on or after January 1 2010, will not pay a surcharge.

Those with 2009 sailings might even get a refund, in the form of an on-board credit, if oil prices stay low, but what is the chance of that when the oil-producing nations have already decided to cut back production to push up the price?

Just in case, there are some very complicated price mechanisms in place to determine who might get what if the price goes down or stays level. If anyone actually understands them, I reckon they should be rewarded with a free cruise.

Carnival has also negated any cause for celebration by announcing price rises effective from, you've guessed it, October 31. It's a clever move. The whole world hates the S word, so just swallow up the supplement in the price. I have no doubt others will soon follow suit. Will they be as honest? Only time will tell.

Travel Pulse reports USB cruise industry analyst Robin Farley has revised 2009 and 2010 yield estimates and is now forecasting a 3% decline for 2009 and a flat year for 2010.

October has reportedly been a very challenging month so far and as a result cruise lines have become more aggressive with 2009 promotions, starting them earlier than normal given the macroeconomic environment.

It's certainly true there are a lot of deals out there. Yesterday I reported Ocean Village is giving away Caribbean cruises, now I've got this from six-star SeaDream Yacht Club - seven nights in the Caribbean for £2,795, departing January 31. That's a straight 50% price cut and includes flights and transfers, an overnight stay in Antigua before the cruise, alcohol and soft drinks and gratuities.

It's on offer from BA-way Cruise. To book, call 0208 248 2355.

The Seattle Times concludes the cruise sector is facing rougher seas after a Cruise Lines International Association report showed the number of North Americans cruising last year grew by just 1%.

The CLIA says 12.6 million people took cruises worldwide last year, 4.7% more than the previous year, and that in the first half of this year numbers grew 5.8%.

But the 2007 CLIA Economic Study also says North Americans contributed just 1% of that growth as economic woes - falling house prices, rising unemployment and reduced airline capacity - made many think twice about a cruise holiday.

The report notes that in 1995, around 11% of passengers on CLIA members cruises came from outside North America. This year to date, overseas passengers represent more than 20% of cruise passengers.

I couldn't help but smile at the story this week about the Thomson Celebration passengers who had a cruise to, well nowhere.

I don't think they saw the funny side. The ship was due to set off on a three-day cruise to Ireland when bad weather struck. The captain could have battled his way through the storms or settled for a couple days in Liverpool.

Very sensibly he chose the latter. Who on earth wants to spend three days being sick on the Irish Sea? But then, who wants to spend three days tied up at Liverpool docks?

Quite a few people, apparently. Everyone was free to go home - and incidentally would still get the 80% refund, offered in the form of vouchers to use against another Thomson cruise - but many decided to stay on board and eat, drink, enjoy the entertainment, even have a free bus trip into the city. In fact they had everything but Ireland and the seasickness.

Some have now cried foul because they are not getting a full refund. Thomson cited terms and conditions, said it was an insurance issue and that it was not obliged to give any refund at all. All to do with small print and why we are all urged to have travel insurance.

Mr and Mrs Scott, quoted in the Liverpool Echo, said it was "scandalous", especially as ferries were making the crossing and they were in a ship. Yes, but Thomson Celebration is not a very big ship. History doesn't relate if they stayed on board and enjoyed the hospitality anyway - or indeed whether they had any travel insurance to cover the £279 they had each splashed out on the break.

Personally I prefer the attitude of the couple from Crewe quoted by Cruise Critic.

"We are disappointed, but we know it couldn't be helped and at least there is good food, good entertainment and people were having fun."

Kelly Ranson, Cruise Critic's UK editor, just happened to be on the ship and wrote:

This seemed to sum up the attitude of the majority -- and although everyone was disappointed that they were not visit Cork or Dublin, the facilities and the attitude of the staff on the ship helped to make a good weekend away.

The interesting question is whether any will use their refund vouchers and have another go on Thomson cruise. Or is once enough? We'll never know.

It was nice to read on e-tid that no one will face the chop in the wake of Carnival UK's decision to axe Ocean Village.

A spokeswoman said the ships' crews will transfer to P&O Australia, while land-based staff will be needed at P&O Cruises and Cunard, which are both getting an extra ship in 2010.

P&O Cruises takes delivery of the 3,100-passenger Azura in spring 2010, with the new 2,100-passenger Queen Elizabeth joining Cunard in October that year.

"The 26 people who work shore-side on Ocean Village will be absorbed with this new capacity."

Norwegian Cruise Line has announced it will be axing fuel supplements on all bookings made after November 10 for cruises departing on or after January 1 2010.

There are also complicated rules to determine whether those already booked for cruises after that date will get a refund in the form of an onboard credit; likewise, for those who have booked a 2009 cruise.

After this year's roller-coaster oil ride, I can understand why NCL is cautious, but it does seem a little unfair that anyone who has booked early for 2010 - what the cruiselines want them to do, after all - is to be penalised for their eagerness.

There is a real danger these people will be so annoyed they'll join the ranks of the last-minute bookers and that is not good anytime, but especially not when times are tough.

It's an intriguing question, posed by Mark Tre in the Cruise Examiner, in a piece looking at the winners and losers in the cruise industry in the current financial crisis.

He reckons the big two - Carnival Corp and Royal Caribbean Cruise Lines - are best positioned to ride out the storm, but that question marks hang over Norwegian Cruise Line and MSC Cruises.

The big question about MSC is not only whether it will be able to survive a rapid expansion in a short number of years, but whether parent company Mediterranean Shipping Company, the world's second-largest container line, can survive in a diminishing market where freight rates are dropping every week.

NCL may be a stronger position, now being half-owned by Apollo Management as well as Star Cruises. But Apollo had had to follow through on a recent major acquisition in another market and has a full interest in Oceania Cruises and Regent Seven Seas Cruises that it must also look after. There have also been reported disagreements between Apollo and NCL as to the future path that NCL should be taking, one of the reasons for the dispute over the F3s.

Can the two get together to take on the big two? Or would MSC fill a hole at Royal Caribbean and offer a counterpoint to Carnival's Costa?

This is not the best time for cruise lines to be on a spending spree - or is it? Desperate times can mean desperate deals.

Here's a different take on the fuel surcharge issue.

Rather than dropping the supplement altogether, Fred Olsen Cruise Lines is offering passengers who have paid the surcharge a refund if the price of oil is on average less than £40 per barrel in the calendar month before their departure.

The rebate will be offered for cruises after January 1 2009. As with other lines, money will be given back as on-board credit rather than a cash.

First it was the oldies; now it seems it's the big spenders who will take the cruise industry through the recession.

Because just as the rest of the industry starts to feel the crunch, White Star Cruises, the luxury cruise arm of WEXAS - The Travellers Club, reports record sales figures in October.

The on-line company sells only five and six-star cruiselines - the likes of Crystal Cruise, Silversea, Regent Seven Seas Cruises, SeaDream Yacht Club, Swan Hellenic and Peter Deilmann - and says its average sales price is a whopping £5,500 per person.

Just to prove things are good, White Star has produced a 60-page on-line brochure featuring 15 of the world's top-rated cruiselines. General manager Scott Anderson calls it "informative, inspirational and independent".

No, I don't entirely follow the logic either. If a company is so happily crunch-busting, why spend time and effort creating such a masterpiece? But no matter. It's refreshing to have good news while all around is recession. Long may the luxury guys carry on cruising.

Here's some interesting news from Grand UK Holidays that should help to banish some of the clouds hanging over the cruise industry.

The over-55s specialist has found that the grey market is not half so concerned about the current economic downturn as bright young things saddled with debt.

Research by web analyst Hitwise found that almost 60% of vistors to cruise websites are aged over 55. More importantly for the trade, its report says they are more likely to book through a travel agency than direct with the cruise company.

"UK internet visits to cruise websites, which typically peak in December, increased by 8.2% between September 2007 and September 2008."

Hitwise figures also show that in the three months ended October 25 2008, the Caribbean was the most searched-for cruise destination in the UK, while Norway was the most popular destination. During September, P&O Cruises was the most visited cruise website in the UK, receiving one in every 10 visits to the category.

Naturally there is a reason why Grand UK is giving us this info. It has just launched its 2009 summer cruise programme featuring cruises from the UK on Fred Olsen Cruise Lines and Transocean Tours, which operates sailings on Marco Polo from Tilbury.

Grand UK Holidays sales director Harold Burke said retired holidaymakers are less affected by mortgage rate rises and their kids have left home. They're also accustomed to taking several breaks a year and can travel in term times.

"We are not immune to the effects of the economy but we have not yet seen a downturn, and our experience is mirrored in these statistics."

Travelmole reports P&O Cruises is to make some changes to Ventura after admitting to facing "challenges" in the first summer season.

In a letter to travel agents, managing director Nigel Esdale says they will stop taking bookings for the Freedom dining restaurant so diners really do have freedom to turn up and dine when they want - hopefully getting a table straight away - the Beach House self-service will become an informal dining venue with waiter service and sunloungers will be placed on deck 19, in an area previously devoted only to the bungee trampolines and Cirque Ventura.

"We will retain the bungee trampolines which have been a real hit with passengers aged from 8 to 84. And we will continue to offer the Cirque Ventura circus skills school teaching the art of juggling, tightrope and stilt walking."

In addition, new furniture, including a reclining chair, will be put on cabin balconies, to help alleviate demand for loungers on the open deck.

I reported in my cruise column in the Telegraph on the problems of Freedom dining I encountered when I was on board and spoke to people who were fed up with the morning rush to grab a sunlounger so it's good news that all these things are now being addressed.

QE2 might have left Southampton for the last time, but the old girl is not going to disappear from the headlines.

Dubai is planning to match last week's fond farewell at the south coast port with an equally big welcome when the ship arrives in the emirate on November 26.

QE2 will be met at The World islands by a flotilla of local yachts, boats and leisure craft led by a Royal Navy frigate, and there's an open invitation to anyone with a boat to register and be part of the welcome.

QE2 is to be transformed into a luxury floating hotel off the trunk of Palm Jumeirah by new Nakheel, which is also planning to open a heritage museum displaying artefacts from the ship and of local maritime history.

Great for anyone who happens to be in Dubai, but what about past passengers left without their favourite ship to cruise on? I offered some QE2 alternatives in a piece in the Telegraph. Let me know if you have any other suggestions.

Worrying story in Travel Agent Central of the tough time being faced by US travel agents because, as we all known, what happens over the Pond happens over here.

Of course it's inevitable that bookings will slow when recession hits and people are worried about money and jobs, but one agents says people are "scared" and admits she has very few new orders."Scared" is a different ball game.

On the positive side, cruise lines are coming in with bargains to try to encourage sales. The paper says Celebrity Cruises had a three-day Post-Election Sale-a-Bration. Clever, but not nearly as attractive as MSC's cruise for £1 offer.

Other lines are upping commission to get agents on side; others still are moving ships to local ports to try to capture demand. It's why Carnival president and CEO Gerry Cahill decided to pull out of Europe.

"Close-to-home cruise options...are clearly the preference of the vast majority of the mainstream vacation market right now."

Oasis of the Seas has such a lot of new things on board to thrill and excite passengers that the ship had to be the size it is just to hold them all, explains Royal Caribbean Cruise Lines chairman and chief executive officer Richard Fain.

Speaking at the float out of the ship, in a snow-covered shipyard in Turku, Finland, he said Oasis is one-third traditional Royal Caribbean, one-third evolutionary and one-third revolutionary.

The traditional is, for instance the Schooner Bar, which can be found on other Royal Caribbean ships. The evolution is the Royal Promenade, which is twice the width of the promenades on other ships, and will twist and turn instead of running in a straight line. The revolution is Central Park, a huge open area in the middle of the ship that will have real trees and shrubs, the loft suites, the Aquatheatre, zipwire and more.

"I know size is what everyone focuses on, but we didn't set out to build the world's biggest ship. Oasis is big because we decide what we want to put in and than wrap a ship around it. We don't just take rooms from other ships and make them bigger, but we add more, to give passengers the opportunity to do things they never would have thought of doing on a ship."

Fain revealed that he initially thought putting a rock-climbing wall on the Voyager-class ships was a really stupid idea, but went along with it because it was the least stupid idea he was presented with at the time. He now jokes that it was one of the best ideas he ever had ("that's one of the benefits of being chairman!").

Oasis of the Seas is now 65% ready. Its first sea trial is scheduled for June, with a second one in September.

It will weigh 225,000 tons (this is the shipyard's figure, which keen readers will notice is another 5,000 on the tonnage previously quoted), which makes it more than twice as heavy as an aircraft carrier, and carry 5,400 passengers.

Inside, there will be 5,000km of electric cable, 250km of pipes, 100,000 electric points, 90,000 square metres of carpet, 8,000 square metres of windows and there will be 2,300 metric tons of water in the pools. In all, it will be made up of about 500,000 individual parts.

Now Oasis of the Seas is out of the dry dock, the yard can start work on sister ship Allure of the Seas. The keel-laying is on December 2, with delivery slated for late autumn 2010.

Cruise Critic reports that Fred Olsen is considering pulling its Liverpool departures because of the scrapyard scenery and "abysmal" facilities its passengers have to put up with at Langton Docks.

Thomson Cruises has already voted with its fleet and decided not to offer cruises from Liverpool after a trial run this summer.

The problem? Cruises that start and end in Liverpool have to use Langton Docks, while cruiselines just visiting for the day get to use the shiny new terminal.

The reason? The powers that be managed to build the new terminal that doesn't have the customs and baggage-handling facilities needed for turnaround days, when one set of passengers disembarks and the next lot comes on.

The result? Huge loss of potential earnings to the city.

How clever was that?

When it is a taster cruise from Cruise Thomas Cook. These tasters are a benefit for anyone who joins the retailer's new Cruise Club and explained as follows:

"For those who want to sample a life at sea for real, taster cruises are available for The Cruise Club members to book for a small fee. Once on board members will be given the opportunity to sample a menu and view a selection of cabins to help decide if a cruise is right for them. If it is, when they book, the fee will be refunded."

Wow. What a fab offer. You can go on a short cruise and "sample life at sea" - and the cost is refunded if you then book another cruise?

Er, no. It's actually a ship visit, a meal on board and a tour of the cabins.

Nothing new there then.

Princess Cruises must be cock-a-hoop about Cruise Thomas Cook's new cruise report.

The Love Boat line puts a lots of store on romance and now it transpires they were right, with nearly two-thirds of the 5,000 Brits polled by the cruise retailer revealing that a cruise helps to put the spark back in their relationships.

More than half of those surveyed said tables for two at dinner get them in a romantic mood, while 30% said dining on their cabin balcony gets them in the mood (good news for Princess, which has Anytime dining for passengers who want a romantic table for two and balcony dining for lovers who prefer a little privacy).

Just under a quarter said a Champagne breakfast worked magic in the romance department, while one in four said they'd like to get married on a cruise ship (yes, Princess can help there as well, with its weddings at sea performed by the captain). The findings are just a few of the facts to emerge from Cruise Thomas Cook's first cruise report.

* 70% would like to see a full-scale West End or Broadway musicals (with West End and Broadway quality performers, I would hope, but history doesn't relate).

* 57% wanted a total ban on smoking.

* 44% would love a branch of Marks & Spencer and Boots on a cruise ship (why go away if you want to take the high street with you, I wonder?)

* 45% of female cruisers buy new undies before setting off on a cruise (hopefully they are cruising with their loved ones, although again history does not relate).

* 65% prefer organised shore excursions to exploring alone.

It's all good fun stuff, but the really important thing for agents and cruise lines is that the survey bears out what has been said so many times: Get someone on a cruise once and they will be back. Some 4,811 of the 5,000 polled had been on a cruise and more than three quarters said they "were very likely" to cruise again.

Cruise Thomas Cook director Marc Bennett said: "As an independent cruise retailer we are in a good position to provide this type of report. There is no angle for us but the most important factor in continuing to grow the UK cruise market will be a greater understanding of the needs and requirements of today's cruise passengers."

Do I spy a possible sideline selling undies? I'll bet it's more lucrative than travel insurance and forex, and certainly a lot more interesting.

It's good to read in Cruise Critic that several cruiselines are dropping the complicated mathematical formula introduced to work out whether passengers will pay a fuel supplement, and instead banishing surcharges to the box marked history.

It has been a long time coming, especially given the price of oil has been hovering around the $50 a barrel mark for some time - well below the $150 high of the summer when the supplements were introduced.

Then they had good reason; now it just looks as if the supplement is being used to help pay for the hefty discounts being offered to get people booking in these tough economic times.

Carnival Corporation's Carnival Cruise Lines, Holland America Line, Costa Cruises, Cunard, Princess Cruises and Yachts of Seabourn will be axing the supplement from December 17 2008. Norwegian Cruise Line and Royal Caribbean brands Celebrity Cruises, Azamara Cruises and Royal Caribbean International follow suit on January 1 2009.

That's a good start. Now let's hear from the lines that are still charging. There's still time for them to make it a happy Christmas for their (British) customers.

MSC Cruises' "sail for £1" sale, for this week only (at least as far as we know), seems to have hit wanabee-be cruisers in all the right places.

Operations and reservations manager Milica Mocevic says they have had to draft in extra staff to cope with all the demand.

Which just goes to show what a clever piece of marketing it is.

You only qualify for the £1 cruise when you book with another person paying full brochure price.

When you get over the emotive £1 bit, you realise this is actually just what other cruiselines - and indeed travel companies generally - call "buy one get one free". Except people going for this offer are paying top whack by getting the £1 in return for paying full brochure price.

I reckon they'd probably be better off - literally - shopping around for the 40% and more discounts doing the rounds in these credit-crunching days.

But they are not and MSC is reaping the benefits. Smart.

The pirate attack on Oceana's Nautica on Sunday morning (November 30) has naturally provoked a lot of talk about the safety of cruising.

In my cruise column in the Telegraph this week, I refer to a quick poll I did among other passengers on the Windstar cruise I am on at the moment in the Caribbean.

A resounding "no" met my question "would the pirate attack put you off cruising?"

One man pointed out that Nautica was close to capacity for its cruise through waters that have become notorious for pirates, while here in the sunny Caribbean, Wind Star has just a quarter full.

It certainly doesn't smack of people running scared.

Another woman paused to wonder what she might think if Captain Jack Sparrow, aka Johnny Depp, appeared on the horizon, skull and crossbones waving in the breeze. We both decided we would force our captain, Briton Mark Boylin, to lower the ropes and let him board!

Cutting prices is one thing, cutting prices and angering others who have paid a higher price for the same cruise is something else. How not to win hearts and minds.

So good for Voyages of Discovery, which is extending savings just announced on ex-UK sailings and flycruises to passengers who have already booked.

It means some people will cash in on savings of up to 50% on the early-booking prices, or benefit from new prices up to £900 below what they were. Perfect for countering all the bad news floating around right now.

It'll be interesting to see if other lines follow suit.

Interesting to get some information from Star Clippers that doesn't just tell me how well they are doing. On the contrary it says the cruise line is to suspend fuel supplements for all cruises departing after March 31 2010. Moreover it is going to refund passengers booking a cruise around Tahiti the magnificent sum of £200 towards the cost of their flights.

Are they in the real world? When most of the rest of the cruising industry, with a few notable exceptions, is getting rid of fuel supplements altogether now, Star Clippers - which operates sailing ships, you will remember, which sail when wind conditions allow, thereby saving on fuel consumption - thinks it is good news that they will be suspended in more than 12 months time. Have they looked at the cost of oil lately?

As for £200 per person towards the cost of a flight to Tahiti. When cruise lines are cutting fares frantically to get people booking, the word generous does not spring to mind.

Costa Cruises has launched a new family fare which makes it more affordable for mums and dads to book a separate cabin for the kids.

It's a great deal for parents fed up with going to bed early with the little ones or having to creep around the cabin in the mornings while teens have their beauty sleep.

But what's really interesting about this news is that it transpires Costa doesn't require children to be over a certain age before they can have a cabin to themselves.

"There is no lower age limit for children in their own cabin. As long as there is a person aged over 18 in the cruise party, it is then the parents responsibility for the children in the separate cabin. Costa will try to give interconnecting cabins where possible, but this is not guaranteed."

Norwegian Cruise Line says"kids" have to be over 21 to have their own cabin, which is frankly ridiculous and a rule made to be broken, but no minimum age is not wise either. Imagine a couple of kids under the age of 10 trying to cope in an emergency.

MSC Cruises and P&O Cruises stipulate 18 years, Princess Cruises requires children in a cabi on their own to be aged over 16.

Oceania Cruises president Bob Binder is not running scared after Nautica was fired on by pirates at the end of last month.

In an interview in Travel Weekly US, he says they will evaluate itineraries in the area in the interest of the safety of passengers, crew and safety - no surprise there - but adds the pirates are "not a great concern".

I imagine the incident was frightening for passengers - that's if they noticed it was happening. Binder says they were asked to leave the open decks twice (standard procedure in such an incident), but the whole thing was over in just a few moments.

But if we're going to let pirates frighten us out of the Gulf of Aden, cruiseships should also stop sailing into Santorini in case they hit an inaccurately chartered reef and avoid the Arctic and Antarctica as they might hit an iceberg. They should also stay out of the English Channel in case they come across the waterborne equivalent of a boy racer.

Life would be so safe. But oh so boring.

Prestige Cruise Holdings, the parent company of Oceania Cruises and Regent Seven Seas Cruises, the latest to drop fuel supplements.

The change is effective January 1 2009. Passengers who have already paid the supplement for cruises next year will have the money refunded as an on-board credit.

Soon it'll be only the British lines holding out for the supplement. Why?

Rather than pit passengers against pirates, Cruise Critic says Hapag-Lloyd is going to disembark all those on the first sector of Columbus' world cruise at an undisclosed point before they reach the Gulf of Aden and fly them to Dubai, where they will wait in five-star luxury for the ship to catch up. There will be no extra cost to passengers.

The ship will be manned by a skeleton crew as most of the staff will also be taken off and flown to Dubai.

Hapag-Lloyd managing director Sebastian Ahrens says as long as the situation in the Gulf of Aden is uncertain they will not cruise through the region with passengers on board.

Just over a week ago, there was a failed pirate attack on Oceania Cruises' Nautica.

Eagle-eyed readers will note that MSC Cruises' new ship MSC Fantasia seems to have shrunk somewhat according to my blog entries, now holding 3,274 passengers where once it held almost 4,000.

I guess it's the ship equivalent of clever accounting. Most cruiselines "size" their ships on double occupancy, with a second higher figure to show the maximum that can be squeezed on with third and fourth berths in cabins filled.

MSC Cruises has always quoted the maximum occupancy in relation to MSC Fantasia - 3,959 passengers - but as that doesn't allow for proper comparisons with other ships I am now going to quote the double-occupancy figure.

I know it doesn't sound so big, but it means the space ratio rockets from 33.7 to 40.7. Which means there is more room for everyone. Surely a bigger selling point for Brits after a bit of peace and quiet?

Just to prove there is no such thing as bad publicity, USA Today's Cruise Log reports hits on the Oceania Cruises website went through the roof on news of the attempted attack by pirates.

Not only has the world now heard about Oceania Cruises, but one agent is reported as saying the great American public has now discovered where the Gulf of Aden is and is interested in going there.

And here are the cruiselines thinking they have to sell at rock-bottom prices to get people to book.

It's official. QE2's red funnel is to be sliced off, restored and become the central attraction of a new maritime museum close to the vessel full of memorabilia taken from on board.

After months of speculation, details of QE2's new look were released at this week's Seatrade Middle East Cruise Conference by Manfred Ursprunger, CEO of new owner QE2 Enterprises, which in turn is owned by Dubai-based Nakheel.

"QE2's arrival in Dubai is not the end for the most famous liner in the world but a new beginning."

"New" is certainly the word. Essentially the ship's insides are to be ripped out to create a new luxury hotel with 200 rooms, 110 apartments and five restaurants, serving menus created by celebrity chef Michel Roux. There will be a theatre where once there were engines.

A replica funnel will, as predicted, house an apartment that the new owners hope will become one of the most sought after addresses in Dubai.

The bridge, captain's cabin and Princess Grill will be kept, to become part of a heritage trail around the 40-year-old vessel. Hardly the most exciting day out, but no doubt plenty of people will stump up to see the QE2's rather paltry remains.

All the work is being done locally, at the Drydocks World repair yard, and is expected to take up to three years. An incredibly long time given they they build new ships in 18 months.

Rumours are that it is - or at least it is but for one ship instead of two, and at a much increased cost. But as usual Norwegian Cruise Line and STX Europe are not saying a word. Leaving us all free to continue to speculate.

Crystal Cruises has followed the pack and is dropping its fuel surcharge for cruises on or after January 1 2009. If you're on a Crystal cruise and have paid in full you'll get a shipboard credit, if you've yet to pay in total, the final invoice will be adjusted.

Happily, they are all falling like flies, although there is still silence from British lines P&O Cruises, Fred Olsen and Ocean Village.

Check out Cruise Critic for a handy round-up of who's doing what.

It's bad enough that Star Clippers is retaining the fuel supplement until March 31 2010. Now I read that honour is actually only for us Europeans and it is lifting the supplement for passengers from North and Latin American only as from January 1 2009.

Nice to see where their loyalties lie. That's a whole 13 more months they plan to charge us the levy, even though the price of oil has plummeted.

I hope passengers vote with their bookings. After all, there are plenty of other lines out there that are playing fair.

We need to see more stories like this. John W Schoen writing for msnbc and quoting a panel of economists who reckon the green shoots of recovery are starting to appear amid all the doom and gloom.

Could it be? Well, why not? No one forecast the recession until it was almost upon us, so who's to say it won't go in an equally unexpected fashion.

More to point, is it really good news? Well, for all those of us shuddering every time they say house prices are going down more or for anyone fearful of losing their job, of course it is.

With discounts of 50% and more biting into their bottom lines, we can be pretty confident that cruiselines would rather see the back of the recession as well.

But what about cruisers? There are some fantastic bargains around at the moment for anyone with a few pennies in the bank, And let's face it, a lot of cruisers have quite a few pennies, even if they are smarting from the current ultra-low interest rates. They might be fed up with all the bad news, as are we all, but they are having a fine time with all the bargains around. Why would they want a return to the status quo?

Rob Lovitt, also writing for msnbc, taking his cue from those aforementioned economists, suggests there could be a rebound in consumer confidence in the second half of the year - and therefore a rebound in people's willingness to travel.

I think he could be right. It's going to be a tough year, but who can resist when Oceania Cruises knocks 50% off prices or NCL dishes out cruises for less than £90 a day. Or you can pick up a transatlantic crossing on Cunard's Queen Mary 2 for just £699 including a flight. If the bargain hunters do their bit, we could end the year with a record number of UK cruisers.

Even if he's not right, it's the kind of upbeat news we could all do with hearing and could also get those bookers booking.

Here's to cruising in 2009. Let's make it a good one.

Service at dinner that took so long the diners were not able to have dessert, poor foor - as in quality and temperature, crew trained only to say "is no possible".

It's hard to believe Matts' review of MSC Cruises new flagship MSC Fantasia on Cruise Talk could have been any worse. Oh, but then I neglected to mention the three and a half hours he waited to check in ( I refuse to use the word queue when discussing an Italian ship), unhelpful shore-ex staff and a refusal to serve iced water at dinner.

Can he really be talking about a cruise, where crew are always to polite and helpful, food is wonderful (hmmm -- always a moot point, I find) and the waiters usually try to drown you in iced water. Can he really be talking about MSC Cruises, which makes such a virtue of its Italian-ness, right down to the Italian crew?

Sadly yes, because I can relate to so much of what he said, both from previous experience with MSC Cruises - although I did think things were improving on MSC Poesia - and my two nights on MSC Fantasia after the naming.

Unlike Matts, I found the crew are trained to say "no" or "I don't know". Both usefully negative though and guaranteed to make you walk away in frustration so they don't have to do anything. Either that or they ignore you. I had two trawl three bars one evening before I could find one where the barman acknowledged my presence, let alone served me a glass of wine.

I will put in a good word for the spa though. The woman behind the desk took time and trouble to show me around. She even smiled. She was from Indonesia. Just a shame that with one day to go before paying passengers came on they did not even have brochures ready listing treatments and prices.

Reminds me of the time I was on board for the naming of MSC Musica. In the speciality restaurant - their first one, actually part of the self-service, but it looked the part - I asked to see the menu. "Not open" was the gruff response.

I tried again, pointing out I just wanted to see what they served. The answer was they didn't have any menus. But in fewer words. And yes, paying passengers were about to come on. Italians mainly, of course. I suspect either they have the magic words to get things done - or maybe they are just too used to chaos to care.

Thank goodness we at least had the good news that one of its F3 new-build ships is back on track, because otherwise it's not been the greatest December for Norwegian Cruise Line.

On Christmas Day it was reported that Star Cruises is getting out of NCL America, suggesting Star has no confidence in its future although the brand sails on. The following day Cruise Critic said a passenger was missing, presumed overboard, from Norwegian Pearl. She disappeared while the ship was at sea east of Cancun, Mexico.

Sadly there was no sign of the woman, 36-year-old Jennifer Seitz, from Florida, during a four-day sweep of the area by the US Coast Guard and Mexican Navy. The search was called off on Monday and the FBI is now investigating her disappearance.

Seatrade's Insider News website reports that Star Cruises, which owns 50% of NCL (Apollo Investment owns the other half), is pulling out of Norwegian Cruise Line's ill-fated NCL America operation.

It's no surprise. NCL America started with such a great fanfare. A US-flagged operation with three ships all sailing within Hawai'i, cutting out the need for the four days at sea - in both directions - for ships sailing to the islands from the US east coast. It sounded brilliant.

Only problem was, it wasn't making any money and having a mainly US crew also produced massive staffing problems. So one ship came out, then another, leaving just Pride of America to continue to fly the Stars and Stripes. Papers were drawn up in September 2007 allowing for either or both parties to exit or disband NCL America at the end of 2008.

In the event it is just Star that wants out so it doesn't mean the end of NCL America. Its Hawai'i programme has been confirmed until 2012 and it is making money, according to NCL president and ceo Kevin Sheehan.

It held on and on, but Fred Olsen Cruise Lines has at last announced the end of fuel supplements. They were dropped last week. Anyone who has already paid them will get them refunded as on-board credit.

Armed with the worse-than-useless map provided by Costa Cruises, we hit the streets of Manama City, the capital of Bahrain, this morning. Mission: To see the Grand Mosque.

Go out and right, we were told by the security man at the yet-to-be-finished Harbour Mall. As there was nothing for as far as the eye could see but building work and cranes, I asked a passing American. It's that way, he said, pointing the opposite direction. But a long way. Too far to walk.

He called over to a friend to confirm what he thought as he had only lived in Bahrain a couple of months. The friend pointed to a building straight across the street from us. "Take the road in front of that building. It's down there." He sounded so positive, we crossed the street, walked to the front of the building. No sign of said road.

At that point we gave up and took a picture of the World Trade Centre instead. An amazing piece of 21st-century architecture and such a contrast to the narrow streets, alleys and shops in the nearby old souk.

It was quite amusing because it didn't hugely matter to Ilana and I if we saw the mosque or not. But it's not funny if this is your holiday and your one chance to see the highlights.

We finally discovered the mosque is a two-mile walk from the centre of Manama, about halfway between the city and the ship. We had seen it when we drove in, but decided it was not the Grand Mosque as it was not where indicated on Costa's map. How stupid of us to think it would be.

Especially after a couple of Brits we spoke to at reception last night said they had gone in search of the souk and fort indicated as places of interest on the map of Abu Dhabi. They found both. The former is a construction site; the latter is closed for renovations.

"They need to update their information," one said. Update and improve, I would say. These are all new ports for most passengers and those not keen on rather over-priced shore excursions (and they are crippling for us Brits now the pound is so weak) would appreciate a bit of help getting around.

I realise that doesn't make any money for Costa, but with a little bit of help we would all be going home with a much more positive feeling about the cruiseline.

Cruising on Costa Victoria is a bit like being in the film Cabaret, with every announcement in at least four language and usually many more.

You have to take your hat off to the crew for their ability to switch languages at the drop of a hat. At dinner, our waiter Jose Sanchez, from Peru, speaks English to Ilana and I, Italian to the people on the next table. His native language is Spanish and he also speaks Portuguese. All fluently, without even an "um" or "err".

Captain Mario Moretta was great at his welcome cocktail evening, switching so casually between English, German, Italian, Dutch and French that in the end I really didn't know which language he was speaking. But even he had to use his notes to read a welcome in Japanese and Russian. That got an applause.

Unlike the boat drill, when we had to endure an explanation of what to do when the alarm sounded in eight languages, including Japanese and Russian, then stand by the lifeboats in our lifejackets while more instructions were read. Again in eight languages.

"I wonder what would happen in a real emergency," someone near me commented. "We'd have sunk by the time they got through that lot."

I am not a great fan of that great cruise ship tradition of fixed dining, so I was not looking forward to dinner time on my Costa Cruises' voyage around the Arabian Gulf on Costa Victoria.

In fact I was dreading it so much that even before leaving home, I planned to avoid it by paying to eat to the speciality restaurant every night.

My dread was heightened because it was a Costa cruise, packed with Italians, Germans, French and countless other nationalities. Imagine sharing a table for a whole week with people who do not speak any English.

But here we are, four nights into the cruise, and my daughter Ilana and I have yet to set foot in the speciality restaurant.

Food and the service has been good - and full marks to our assistant waiter Yang Li, from China, who on discovering I like iced-water makes sure there is a jug waiting at the table when we arrive for dinner - but best of all, my daugher Ilana and I have a table for two, by the window, so I don't have to make pathetic attempts to converse in French or German. Italian, I'm afraid, floors me completely.

This is actually our second table. The first was allocated for second sitting, on my request before I know that on Costa that means 9.15pm or 9.30pm, which is too late to eat for me. First sitting is 7pm, which is OK. Certainly not so appalingly early as the 6pm first sitting on other cruise ships.

The change was organised by Fausi, from Tunisia, to whom I explained we needed a table for two because of the language problem. He smiled - somehow I got the idea I was not the first Brit with such a request - shook his head several times and came up trumps. What a star!

Incidentally, the Dutch couple - more correctly he's Dutch, she's English and they live in Holland - we met on our excursion in Oman were allocated a table sharing with others from the Netherlands.

Costa's maitre d's clearly put a lot of thought into this sharing table business. I'm impressed.

I felt I had to pass on this story, sent to me by a lovely couple I met on my recent cruise on Windstar's ship Wind Surf. It was e-mailed to them by another couple on the ship. I won't mention any names as they don't know I'm putting this on my blog.

Anyway he lost a pair of sunglasses on the penultimate day of the cruise. Put them down. They disappeared. She contacted customer services to ask if they had been found. Customer service said they'd be in touch in a week. A month passed. Then one day in snowy Chicago their doorbell rang. It was Fedex, delivering the sunglasses.

How's that for service?

Poor P&O. Stories claiming that Ventura descended to the levels of Benidorm on a recent Caribbean cruise is just the sort of publicity it doesn't want.

I don't know how much of the story was truth and how much exaggeration on the part of aggrieved P&O regulars.

But it was an incident waiting to happen once cruiselines decided to open up cruising to all by cutting prices and lowering standards to cater for the lowest common denominator.

Don't get me wrong. The "formal, fixed, fluff and feathers" cruising of old doesn't do anything for me, but it does help to maintain standards and turn off the chavs and tattoo brigade. Almost as successfully as high prices.

But maintaining prices in a recession is hard, especially when you have big ships to fill. Ventura holds more than 3,000 passengers.

Ultra-luxury cruiselines love to use the expression "likeminded people". It's designed to reassure potential passengers with deep pockets they will be cruising with their own sort, not some riff-raff who have picked up a cheap holiday.

It's not a particularly nice turn of phrase, but what a selling point it's going to be from now on.

It's nothing to do with the weather, but rather John Binkley, executive director of the Alaska Cruise Association, who has been forecasting doom and gloom to the Chicago Sun-Times.

He tells the paper that cruiselines are discounting tickets by up to 40% because they are suffering some of the worst sales they have ever encountered.

The businesses he represents in Alaska must be delighted. It's just the kind of upbeat message you need from your trade association.

It's so nice when people agree with you. According to Travelmole, the US-based Cruise Lines International Association - a sort of US version of our Passenger Shipping Association - reckons there will be a 2.3% rise in the number of cruisers this year.

That's just what I've been saying to anyone who cares to listen. Well, maybe I haven't been quite so specific about percentages, but one of my predictions in my Telegraph cruise column earlier this month was that more Brits would cruise in 2009 than last year.

Look at the facts. Those in work now have unbelievably low mortgages, the cost of fuel has fallen and food prices are not as scary as they were. They have money in their pocket and cruise lines have cut prices to unprecedented levels to get them to book. Cruisers and potential cruisers have never had it so good.

CLIA's prediction refers to worldwide cruisers and makes for the kind of happy reading we need these gloomy recessionary days:

* 2.3% more cruisers worldwide, to a global total of 13.5 million.

* 34 million Americans intending to take a cruise next year

* 94% of all cruisers rating their cruise as satisfying

* 44% saying it was extremely satisfying

CEO Terry Dale admits there is uncertainty about the propects for 2009 but says CLIA members are confident that they will weather the challenges and emerge stronger than ever, as they have before.

"The remarkable diversity and variety of cruises give consumers a unique opportunity to find a vacation that fits their budget even during these economic downturns and we expect that North Americans, Europeans and travellers from all over the world will respond positively."

Way to go Terry. That's the kind of fighting talk we need.

Balmoral's ill-fated Bay of Biscay crossing was not the kind of advert cruiselines sailing from the UK were looking for. A force nine gale, 50ft seas and two Britons taken to hospital with broken bones.

The message boards are rife. Shouldn't Fred Olsen have known there was a storm brewing? How wise was it to plan to cross the Bay of Biscay in January? (A little unfair, I feel, given this water can get fiery any time of the year).

Problem is, the Bay of Biscay is one of the only ways to go if you are cruising from the UK. Ships can leave Dover or Southampton and turn left, but that brings you to the North Sea. Not famed for its calm waters. Or get to the end of Cornwall and turn right into the Irish Sea. That was so bad this year Thomson Cruises refused to leave its berth in Liverpool.

The only other option is to sail round the Isle of Wight. A dizzying experience P&O Cruises tried once but it never caught on!

The simple fact is that anyone choosing to cruise from the UK buys into the chance of rough weather as part of the package, but still more and more Brits are doing it. A 48% increase in 2007 according to the Passenger Shipping Association and even more expected in 2008, when there were more ships sailing from the UK.

My money was on another increase in this recessionary year. Apart from all the usual pros - no airport hassles or delays, pack the kitchen sink - there are no flights to pay for, so it can work out quite a bit cheaper.

Seeing these pictures and reading of first timers who say "never again", all my bets are off.

Americans are carrying on cruising by lowering their standards and time at sea, according to a report in Florida Today, which quotes Howard Frank, Carnival's chief operating officer, to back up the story.

"Our shorter, less expensive Caribbean cruise products are performing much better than our premium and luxury, longer cruise products. So we are seeing a consumer trade-down to value."

Apart from being notable for a rather big howler in the copy*, the report is interesting as it shows that not every fad and fancy crosses the Pond.

In the next edition of TW Cruise, out February 20, I report that British cruisers are not trading down in the recession - in fact some cruise lines say they are trading up as there are such good deals out there. After all, If you can get an outside cabin for just a few pounds more than an inside, or to go from an outside to a balcony, why wouldn't you?

As for spending less time at sea. Not so easy for us as the Miami crowd. There are a few short-break cruises from the UK, but most are seven nights and usually 14 just because of the time it takes to get anywhere (with apologies to St Peter Port, Cork and Zeebrugge, but a day trip to either is hardly the stuff of main summer holidays).

* In case you haven't spotted it, here it is: Sovereign of the Seas sailed for Royal Caribbean International, not Norwegian Cruise Line. But anyway the ship transferred to Spanish line, Pullmantur, owned by Royal Caribbean, last October, and now cruises under the name Sovereign.

NCL started operating three and four-day cruises from Miami to the Bahamas in July 2008, but on Norwegian Sky, the ship plucked out of Hawaii after dwindling sales for the NCL America brand.

Cruise.co.uk regulars have been locked in a discussion this week over pre-paid gratuities. The story so far is that Evans from Spain pre-paid his/her gratuities and was then asked by the travel agent to pay more "because the pound has dropped".

Most responses have been properly outraged at the whole idea of pre-paying tips. If it's a thank you for good service, how can it be paid before you have had the service, they want to know. And I agree.

But contrary to what most replies have said, you can pre-pay tips on Celebrity. It's dressed up as a benefit of course - "so you don't have to worry about the extra expense on board" - but really only shows the gratuities business up for what it is. Namely an additional cost separated off to keep the headline cruise price down.

The key point is that pre-paying is an option if you're cruising with Celebrity. If you prefer you can have gratuities added to your account - either the amount they stipulate or more/less - or taken off so you can tip your cruise staff in cash (if you so choose). If you pre-pay, you can't just ask for the money back if the service doesn't come up to scratch.

So either Evans agreed to pre-pay somewhere during the booking process without realising or the travel agent made a decision on his/her behalf, which doesn't sound right or fair.

As for the increased amount, I suspect it's simply because Evans' cabin was upgraded. Ordinary folk pay one amount, suite passengers pay more because they have a butler to tip as well. The amounts are $11.50 a day for ordinary cabins, $12 a day for Concierge and Aquaclass cabins and $15 for those in a suite, so the butler gets $3.50.

For information, you can also choose to pre-pay gratuities if you're cruising with Celebrity's sister Royal Caribbean, unless you opt for the new Mytime dining, which allows you to eat when and with whom you want, when pre-paying is compulsory. The logic is that you can't tip your waiter for the week, as you can on a fixed dining plan, because you'll have a different one every day.

If you book with Azamara Cruises, which also comes from the Royal Caribbean stable and has open dining as standard, you also have to pay gratuities upfront.

A couple of heartwarming stories this morning for all those people who love to take a swipe at cruiselines for whatever reason they can find that day.

Cruise Community reports P&O Cruises Australia is donating items from its ships that it no longer needs to Mission Australia. It's a fantastic list of stuff - two truck loads of rollaway beds, cots, almost 2,500 bed spreads. The items are distributed to those in need or sold to raise money for the Mission.

Coincidentally, Captain Greybeard - alias John Honeywell of the Mirror - reports that Holland America Line is donating all those left behind pots of gels, shampoo and lotions to the Florida homeless. It will also be giving them unwanted towels, mattresses, TVs, cookware. Apparently they do something similar in Seattle.

It's a great idea. After all, cruiselines are constantly renewing this or upgrading that to make life for us cruisers so very comfortable.

Makes me wonder what they did - and others still do - with all this stuff before?

Just as I was posting comments from P&O Cruises head of brand marketing Philip Price about the changes on Ventura, my friend Phil Nuttall, the boss of specialist agency Cruise Village, was giving his own take on how things have improved after a cruise in the Caribbean this month. He was last on the ship in June last year, just two months after it launched.

His report is very detailed but the overall verdict is that the ship really has settled down and is delivering great cruises.

It's an interesting read, but what really caught my eye was Phil's report about the open day in the atrium, where passengers were able to try to spot a rogue bag on the security scanners, try their hands at making beds, even have a go "driving" Ventura on a ship simulator.

It sounds great fun but apparently only happens occasionally. I'm keeping all things crossed for my cruise to Norway in May. I've always fancied myself as Captain.

Remarks on Travelmole show Costa's new partnership with no-frills carrier Ryanair has gone down like a lead balloon in some quarters.

There are questions about Ryanair's ability to deliver passengers to the port in time - on a cruise-only deal the ship is not under any obligation to wait for guests (no matter who the carrier) - and fears about the high price clients will pay for baggage.

I have never flown with Ryanair and freely admit I have no intention of doing so because I hate the whole low-cost model of having to pay for everything as a separate item. I like to know the price so I can decide if it's OK or not. Easy.

There is also the small issue of having to get to Stansted Airport on the nightmare-ish M25, when British Airways' wonderful Terminal Five is less than 30 minutes away.

But I gather from figures given to me by Sinead Finn, Ryanair's director of commercial revenue, that a lot of people do fly with Ryanair.

Whether they enjoy the experience or not is another question of course, and I guess they don't from all the negative remarks I've heard about the airline. But they go anyway. On that basis, people should have no issue about flying with Ryanair to join their Costa cruise.

Then there is the issue of luggage. Most cruise passengers do like to take the kitchen sink, it's true. But hang on. Costa's UK managing director Marco Rosa made it clear they were after professional young new-to-cruise passengers - people not wedded to their traditions (or their sink) - but who presumably can afford to pay for hold luggage if necessary, especially if the flights really are so cheap.

Alternatively, why not manage on their 10kg hand luggage for a week? I regularly go on a week's cruise with hand luggage only and look smugly at people struggling with bags they can't carry and getting nervous when their luggage does not appear on the carousel.

Of course a lot does depend on the cruise line. Remember, this is not formal P&O, but informal Costa. When I was on Costa Victoria in the Gulf last month, Gala evening (the formal night equivalent) brought out some people wearing black tie, others in slacks and jumpers.

All mixed and mingled together - and there were no dirty looks or chav accusations by the black-tiers. Simply, on Costa if casual floats your boat, that's fine by everyone. And if that's what you like, hand luggage works just fine.

I'd just rather carry my bags onto a BA flight.

P&O Cruises must be breathing several sighs of relief now that wayward teenager Ventura finally seems to be settling down.

Head of brand marketing Philip Price tells me the ship achieved record satisfaction scores at the end of January, with 89% of passengers rating it excellent.

"As a brand we target 90% so this is fantastic. I know we have had some issues marrying the new and old but Ventura is bedding down and we are delivering an excellent product."

Within weeks of Ventura's launch last April, passengers were sharing horror stories on the internet about Freedom dining - namely that it wasn't working - and the lack of sun beds. I added my own voice to the moans in a report on the Telegraph website, pointing out that P&O seemed to realise there was a problem but seemed able to move fast enough to fix it.

But the fixers have done their job now, says Price. Evening entertainment schedules have been changed and there are now three shows a night so people don't all rush to eat at the same time, which has taken pressure off the Freedom dining restaurant.

"We have studied the flow of the ship and structured entertainments around them. Passengers don't have to rush to get to the theatre for 6.30pm or 8.30pm so waiters know they can slow service and dinner can be a more sedate affair."

When I was on, waiters were clearing plates with one hand and serving the next course with the other in their rush to clear tables, which did not make for a good dining experience.

If there is a rush of Freedom diners and space in the fixed dining rooms, they will be seated there rather than having to wait. Also, the Freedom dining room has stopped taking bookings - one of the things I complained about because it blocked out swathes of tables each evening - so it really is a turn-up-and-eat option.

In addition, the Beach House, part of the self-service, has been turned into a waiter-service New York-style diner in the evening with grills, pizzas, saleads and steaks, which has taken pressure off the Freedom dining restaurant and also the buffet.

Joy of joys, Price says you can now also walk up to a bar and get a drink. When I was on last July the order had to go though a drinks waiter, who would pass the order to the barman, who would give the drink to the waiter, who would eventually bring it to you with the bit of paper to sign - although sometimes that bit came later still. And all that happened even if there was no one else at the bar. Irritating? You bet.

Disgruntled sun worshippers now have 120 more sunbeds on deck 19, where the trapeze used to be. It's a shame it's gone as it was good fun, but I'm delighted to say the bungee trampolines have stayed - which is a good excuse for me to show you a picture of me on this modern-day instrument of torture.

When the ship gets back to Southampton for the summer season, P&O will also be replacing the giant tables and upright chairs on the balconies with reclining seats so passengers can sunbathe in their own private space. A sensible move that begs the question, why were they not put on in the first place?

I am going back on Ventura in May, on a cruise to Norway, and can't wait to see how all the changes are working. I'll keep you posted.

Back in the 1950s and 60s, thousands of ten-pound poms emigrated to Australia on P&O Cruises' Arcadia.

Last week the fourth ship to bear that name - P&O Cruises' 21st-century Arcadia - arrived in Sydney for a maiden visit Down Under (the ship is also on its maiden world cruise) and hosted a reunion lunch for a group of those £10-ers. Which is a good excuse to show this picture, by James Morgan, of the ship sailing past the Opera House.

Arcadia is just one of 28 cruise ships which will have called at Sydney in as many days this season. Travel Asia Daily says the passenger terminal at Darling Harbour has been so busy the cargo terminal at White Bay has been drummed into use for cruise ships.

Sydney's Tourism and Transport Forum executive director, Olivia Wirth, says four in one day are expected in early March, but three are too big to sail under the Harbour Bridge and two will have to tender passengers ashore.

Wirth says Sydney needs to improve its facilities if it is to continue reaping the full economic benefits of the cruise industry.

The Sydney Morning Herald reports that change is on the way, but it doesn't sound like "improve" is quite the right word. SMH says the New South Wales government decided last December to move the main cruise ship terminal from East Darling Harbour to White Bay.

Carnival Australia chief executive Ann Sherry is not happy.

"There is so much to see and do around Darling Harbour. In comparison, White Bay is bleak with no buzz or energy.... The NSW government has an opportunity to create a world-class cruise facility but, based on the plans we've been shown, it is a shed at White Bay with nothing else around it."

Nice one, Sydney.

Oh dear. Hasn't anyone got anything nice to say about Norwegian Cruise Lines' new ship, Norwegian Epic? I think it's safe to say it has made an impact -- but for all the wrong reasons, if comments on the Cruise.co.uk and Cruise Critic websites are anything to go by.

Maybe things will improve once it has the trademark NCL graffiti down the sides?

I'm delighted to read MSC Cruises is to recognise the bravery of the four crew members who dived in to rescue the passenger ditched into the sea when MSC Fantasia's gangway collapsed last week.

It all happened in Palma, when high winds caused Fantasia's bow mooring bollards to come loose. The ship moved away from the dock and the gangway went down. The local port authorities have admitted responsibility of the incident.

The Fantasia four - Caso Salvatore, chief crew steward, from Italy; Naim Samsudin, able fireman, from Indonesia; Andrian O Williams, housekeeping cleaner, from Madagascar; and Faamoe Lalopua, Able Sailor, from Samoa - went immediately to the rescue and had the 80-year-old passenger out of the water in minutes. He is said to be recovering well in hospital.

That has to be service beyond the call of duty. I hope they are well rewarded. They certainly deserve it.

A poll by Co-operative Travel into the best cruising companions got me thinking. Which celebrity would I like to go on a cruise with?

The poll of 650 holidaymakers was broken down into four sections - celebrity men and women the men would most like to cruise with and then the same two categories for the ladies. An interesting idea, but clearly people were given a list to choose from as the same celebs appear on each, just in a different order.

And what a random selection of names they were given, including Terry Wogan, Tom Cruise, Carol Vorderman, Rod Stewart. With one exception I would have had to reply "none of the above".

Daniel Craig, aka 007, came out top for the ladies. No surprise there. Stephen Fry topped the men's chart for the top male celeb. Right.

The men chose Myleene Klaas as their favourite female cruise companion - but no I don't think it had anything to do with her godmothering Carnival Splendor in Dover last year (unless it was the moment her dress did a Marilyn Munroe) - while the ladies went for Julie Walters.

All this was done to celebrate old new figures from the Passenger Shipping Association (they have been bandied about enough already, let's face it) that almost 1.5 million Brits took a cruise last year - an 11% increase on 2007. Nice one.

It's been a busy weekend for me with two days taking part in question-and-answer sessions at the Cruise show at London's ExCel.

This was the UK's first dedicated Cruise show - and actually Carolyn Spencer-Brown, editor in chief at Cruise Critic, tells me she doesn't recall any cruise-centric show in the US either - so it was always going to be an experiment.

Carolyn (right) is pictured here with me, Royal Caribbean's associate vice-president general manager UK and Ireland Jo Rzymowska and Sky Travel presenter Claire Smith during one of the panels.

My impression from talking to cruiselines that had stalls (most were represented one way or another and those that were not there were conspicuous for their absence) was that the experiment worked.

Saturday morning was the busiest time. People were actually queuing at the Royal Caribbean stand to make bookings, which was incredible, and other cruiselines were doing very nicely thank you - even having to send back for more brochure supplies and staff to help man the stands.

It was quiet Saturday afternoon - was this when Captain Greybeard was there?; Sunday saw steady visitor numbers. We should know tomorrow what the total attendance was.

I was impressed with the numbers given everything that went against the show. We were informed two days before it opened that the Jubilee Line and DLR were not going to be working. That made getting there a trial for me and hundreds of others. If there's another Cruise show, ExCel is not the place to be!

We had the rugby on Saturday afternoon, Mothering Sunday and the lovely sunny weather. Who wants to be indoors at a show when the sun is shining? Quite a few people it seems. And they got there despite Transport for London.

I was on several Q&A panels with Carolyn, Steve Read from Sky Travel and Simon Veness from World of Cruising, talking about the joys of cruising, cruise destinations and why cruising is such a great holiday for families.

There was a lot of interest in cruising for single people and questions about the swingeing single supplements. I suggested a few cruiselines that don't penalise the lone traveller but it's a shame I couldn't mention more. Here were people who travel alone with money to spend and we were not able to direct them to any of the big lines (except P&O's Azura, but that's not even built yet!).

If there is another show, it would be good if the cruiselines went a little more overboard (sorry, couldn't resist it) with their stands.

A mini rock-climbing wall on the Royal Caribbean one maybe, appearances by Noddy on the P&O one (which actually disappeared under Complete Cruise Solution branding, which means what to consumers?), a mock up of a luxury suite, an executive chef cooking up dishes for visitors to taste.

Fred Olsen Cruise Lines was highlighting their Flagship Golf programme with a putting tent where visitors could practise their strokes, but otherwise none of the things that are on ships to excite and inspire current and would-be cruisers - there were quite a few cruise virgins listening to our talk on Sunday morning - were to be seen. It all costs money I know, but I can't help feeling it was a missed opportunity.

Every recession has a silver lining, it seems.

Pam Conover, Yachts of Seabourn's chief executive, says the cruiseline cut prices in Europe by 65% this summer to get business, and as a result has attracted cruisers who would normally not even think of an ultra-luxury cruise. She is confident they are now hooked.

"We are seeing new guests and new agents who haven't booked us before suddenly booking. That's very positive for us. Once you go to the best, you don't want to trade down. We believe they will continue to cruise with us."

For those who don't know, Seabourn prices include all drinks, gratuities, speciality dining and you even get one free shore excursion on most cruises. Cavier in the surf, for instance. Now who would want to give that up?

Ill-fated Aurora's even more ill-fated world cruise is back in the news. The passengers, it seems, are fed up with looking at the sea.

The P&O Cruises' ship suffered engine problems as it left Sydney and ended up staying six days in Auckland (surely an opening for one of the passengers to write the definitive "how-to-kill-a-week-Auckland" guide book) while the problem was fixed.

Now the ship racing to get back to Southampton, to start its Mediterranean season on time, and has visited just two ports in 22 days after skipping five calls in New Zealand and the South Pacific. Passengers say they are beginning to feel like prisoners rather than world cruisers. All have splashed out thousands of pounds to do a Phileas Fogg.

I sympathise. I did a two-week sector of a world cruise on Aurora last year and while it's a nice ship, I can't imagine being stuck on it for so long without so much as sighting land. You can only read so many books.

It seems they got so bored, they created their own entertainment, the Aurora Committee, with the headline act being a demand for more compensation.

P&O had offered free drinks while in Auckland, a £500 payment and a refund of four days of the cost of cruising, but has apparently decided to be more generous. Is it really that easy?

The British are still booking their cruises, but it's tough in the US. That's the message I've been getting for the past couple of months. But it seems things are not all that bad after all.

MSC Cruises US president and CEO Rick Sasso told this month's Cruise Shipping Miami conference (that's the annual Seatrade get-together but with a new name) that a survey showed about 80% of travel agents thought peak season bookings were equal or better than last year.

He reckons the number of cruise passengers this year will rise 300,000 to 13.4 million, which is roughly what the Cruise Lines International Association (CLIA) was predicting in January.

Of course we all know the numbers are being achieved on very low prices - "unprecedented" is the word that's been used many times in my conversations with cruiselines - so the cruiselines are hurting profits-wise, but I agree with Gerry Cahill, president and CEO of Carnival Cruise Lines, who told the conference that filling capacity is key to survival.

When we come out of this - and we will - it's vital holidaymakers are still thinking cruise. It'll be tough to get them to accept higher prices, but hey, without these challenges life would be just too easy.

The Los Angeles Times reports that a bipartisan group of senators has predicted the travel ban on Americans visiting Cuba is close to being lifted.

Seems they've finally noticed that a policy put in place 50 years ago to undermine Castro's regime hasn't worked!

If it's true, get ready for a rash of new Caribbean itineraries from American cruiselines. They've had to sail past the island while their passengers dream whistfully of Cuba's lovely beaches and classic Cadillacs. Once they can go, the flood gates will be open.

It would be great for Cubans finally to benefit from the tourist euro (although presumably Cuba would have to stop turning its nose up at the dollar?), but I would advise a trip there now, before it happens.

The "real" Cuba will surely disappear under the weight of 3,000 or more passengers disembarking in Havana, and racing to buy the "I love Cuba" t-shirt and cheap jewellery.

Regent Seven Seas Cruises has been forced to cut short Seven Seas Voyager's world cruise after discovering the damage done when fishing lines got tangled in a propulsion pod was greater than first thought.

Attempts had been made to fix the damage in Cochin and Dubai, but it's not been enough. Now the ship is going into dry-dock in Rome for repairs, meaning the end of the line for the world cruisers on board.

They should have sailed from Istanbul, arriving in Fort Lauderdale on May 8. Instead they will all be flown home from Rome. Regent has also cancelled the May 8 sailing from Fort Lauderdale to Southampton via Reykjavik.

It must be pretty gutting to have got so far around the world, only for the voyage to end on such a sour note. But there is a silver lining: Regent has offered a generous compensation packet - and without the passengers even having to threaten a mutiny - including a full refund for passengers on the March 18 voyage from Singapore to Dubai, which was marred by missed ports (the damage was done on leaving Singapore).

Cruise Critic quotes one member saying the "mood of the ship has changed from disappointment and complaints to elation".

Nice one Regent. It might be painful financially but at least passengers will leave with happy thoughts.

I am so glad to read that I am not the only one who looks at a cruise ship under construction and sees, well, a building site.

In his latest blog on the progress of Oasis of the Seas, Royal Caribbean Cruise Lines' chairman Richard Fain admits it's very frustrating that all he can really ever see when he visits the shipyard in Turku is scaffolding. Do they put it up just because he is coming? It love the image and just wish I could draw the cartoon!

For Fain, seeing the ship as a building site must be like buying clothes without seeing if they look good. He's about to fork out $1.4 billion to pay for this little bundle of clothes.

However, he does say that the Diamond Club lounge is taking shape and uses the moment to admit - sort of - that Royal made a mistake by changing the rules and taking away Crown and Anchor Diamond members' (10-24 cruises on Royal) access to the ships' concierge lounges on ll but the very biggest ships.

Lounge access meant a nightly happy hour with free alcohol and a concierge to book spa treatments, shore excursions and the like. As a replacement, they were offered one party night per cruise with free drinks.

The official reason given for restricting access to Diamond-plus members (25 or more cruises with Royal) is that the lounges are getting too full. Strangely, most Diamond members believe it's all to do with money. Give away less booze, profits go up. Simple economics really.

Such was the opposition - check out Cruise Critic to see just how strongly people felt about this - that Royal has been forced to make concessions. First the changes won't happen until September 1. Second, there will now be a nightly party, from 5pm to 8pm, with free wine and champagne, and 25% off the price of other drinks. Diamond members will also have their own continental breakfast area.

Fain attributes the "brouhaha" to the "value" loyal Crown and Anchor members "put on a place where they could relax and enjoy themselves in the company of other similarly minded souls".

No Richard. They were just annoyed that you were taking away their free drinks.

But back to Turku. Because Oasis of the Seas is so big - 220,000 tons with room for 5,400 passengers - it will have a very big Diamond Club lounge so even mere Diamond members will be allowed in.

I can now attest that Oasis' Diamond Club is a major step forward. The actual location and space are terrific.

I suggest Diamond members cruise only on Oasis (and sister ship Allure of the Seas when that launches next year). That way their problem is solved. Until the goal posts move again.

These days you need to take out a second mortgage to sail with the former no-frills easyCruise, where things have changed so much that almost the only thing you'll recognise is the name.

The ship is decked out in stylish grey, the interiors look stylish and modern and the top cabins look comfortable if a little minimalist (note no carpets; makes it easier to clean), with not even a hint of orange.

As for the prices. Let's just say I had to phone easyCruise to make sure I wasn't somehow making a mistake.

Fancy a four-night cruise around Greece and Turkey from May 25-29? The lowest category inside cabin will set you back £1,136 for two people. It's nothing to do with the fact you're booking at short notice either. September 7-11 costs the same. If you go for the top Panoramic Suite it's £2,950 for two people. That's nearly £369 per person per night.

Three-night Greek Island and Turkey cruises are more affordable. You can get an inside cabin from £634 for two people. But you have to cruise in October.

In comparison, four nights cruising from Dover to Zeebrugge, Cherbourg and St Peter Port in Guernsey in an outside cabin on Holland America Line's new ship Eurodam in July costs from £559 per person (the insides have sold out). A balcony suite is from £1,029 per person, or £258 per person per night.

EasyCruise Life is looking very nice, its small size means it can get into the smaller Greek Islands and you are guaranteed sun in Greece, but I can't help feeling Holland America offers the better deal - a newer ship with speciality restaurants, a big spa, live talks and cookery demonstrations. And there are no flights either.

So whatever happened to the cheap-and-cheerful easyCruise, I asked sales and marketing director Paul Ellerby. The answer - apart from the fact they need to make money - is that they are now selling mainly through operators and wholesalers, so prices include commission.

Ellerby says in 2008, 80% of sales were direct and 20% through the trade; for 2009, he expects more than 50% to be through the trade.

Prices also now include food and housekeeping. When easyCruise launched, you just paid for a cabin (but rooms were cleaned between cruises). For 2008 it moved to optional half-board and housekeeping; now you have no choice.

There are also more mod-cons on the ship, with minibars and TVs in the suites, as well as lots of shore excursions, spa packages, beauty packages and drinks packages. In fact, once on board you can spend, spend, spend, just like on any other cruiseline.

For 2009, the line has scrapped seven-night cruises and is instead only selling three and four-day mini breaks from Piraeus or Kusadasi, targeting older people - the average age last year was 39, up from 32 when easyCruise was sailing the French and Italian Rivieras - who want to go Greek Islands sightseeing as part of a larger holiday.

In fact, Ellerby said in September and October last year more than 50% of passengers on the seven-night cruises were more than 50 years old.

Given the prices, which will not appeal to bright young things with a pack on their back, I'm really not surprised.

Before you get too excited, it's not actually happening. But what a brilliant idea for easing a few more dollars out of cruisers' pockets.

While docked in Grenada, Ocho Rios, Kusadasi (the point being it can be anywhere), cruiseships open their doors so passengers from vessels docked alongside can go on board and see what they are missing. For a fee, of course.

I admit a couple of Cruise Critic members actually came up with the idea but I think it's a winner. Passengers on, say, Spirit of Adventure could nip across to Freedom of the Seas to see what it's like to be on an big American ship; those on Ruby Princess could venture onto Balmoral and see what a very British cruise ship is all about.

I can see it now. Crew at the foot of the gangway with a placard advertising the ship tour. Only $100 per person and you get a free keyring and souvenir picture to take home.

Cruiselines would not only increase their on-board income, albeit from people who are technically not on board, but might win over a few sceptical passengers from their rivals. What the marketeers call a win-win situation. I believe.

It would certainly make a change from charging passengers to see the laundry.

Incidentally, I see NCL's new ship's tour has not gone down a storm on Cruise.co.uk. Some great comments. Check them out here.

Thomson Cruises has risen three places to land second place in the UK's Official Cruise Passenger Ratings, as compiled by Cruise.co.uk, putting it way ahead of P&O Cruises, which calls itself Britain's favourite but is languishing at number eight.

Cunard takes the top spot, with Royal Caribbean at number three, Princess Cruises at number four and Ocean Village - the line that's being closed down next year - up five places, at number five.

1: Cunard Cruises - no change
2: Thomson Cruises - up three places
3: Royal Caribbean Cruises - no change
4: Princess Cruises - no change
5: Ocean Village Cruises - up five places
6: Holland America Line - up two places
7: Island Cruises - new entry
8: P&O Cruises - down one place
9: Celebrity Cruises - down three places
10: Fred Olsen Cruises - down one place

Rankings like these are very hit and miss as they depend so much on who voted. Get a lot of Thomson lovers, as could have happened here, and the results are immediately skewed.

But what interests me are the comments from P&O stalwarts on P&O's Community website in response to the results of this poll.

This from Dave T

"I have cruised several times with P&O and am very happy with their product, but in defence of Thomson I have to say, having cruised once, that they are almost as good.... The food and general service on the ship (The Emerald) was at least as good if not better."

 This from Bella36

"I am not at all surprised that Thomson have scored so well.... Their itineraries are varied and different to the "same old, same old" P&O ones and they have a very loyal customer base, most of whom have tried other cruise lines, but always go back to Thomson. I would not hesitate to go with them again."

This from Anthony Smyth

"We thought we were downgrading going on a Thomson ship but how wrong we were... the Celebration is a beautiful ship .... Food was good, entertainment just great and there was a classical concert every evening. In the end we felt we had enjoyed our cruise far more than even on the QE2 the previous summer."

There will be some very happy people at Thomson Cruises right now.

Norwegian Cruise Line has become the latest to cut back its Alaska capacity. blaming the rising costs of deploying three ships in Alaska and new legislation, in particular the $50 head tax.

Royal Caribbean Cruises is taking a ship out of Alaska for summer 2010, while Carnival Corp chairman and chief executive Micky Arison has threatened to "pull capacity" next year due to the tax and regulations. Carnival owns Holland America Line and Princess Cruises, which each have huge land operations in Alaska in addition to the cruises. Cruise West has already taken three ships out the Alaska area for 2009.

Instead of sailing in the 49th state next summer, NCL's Norwegian Sun will be based in Dover, taking over Norwegian Jewel's Baltic Capitals cruises from the UK.

"Here comes the Sun" NCL proclaimed as it released the news, putting a happy slant on the fact they are actually reducing capacity from the UK yet again next year. For summer 2010, after just two years, NCL is also pulling all its cruises from Southampton and repositioning Norwegian Jade in Venice.

Southampton worked well but cruises from Venice are more straightforward, I was told. As cruising from the UK is about as straightforward as it gets for the Brits, I suspect that means the Americans weren't too impressed with cruising from Southampton.

Norwegian Sun holds 1,936 passengers, while Jewel has capacity for 2,376. For summer 2010, Jewel moves to New York, from where it will be sailing various seven and 10-night cruises to the Bahamas, Florida, New England and Canada.

If your cruise is affected by the Sun/Jewel swap you can change to a comparable sailing but you need to be fast as transfers must be done by May 11. Call NCL on 020 7591 8007.

Talking of tips, here's something anyone who decides to opt out of pre-paying gratuities might like to know. The crew know who you are.

It appears a list of people who opted out of pre-paying gratuities on Carnival Cruise Lines' Carnival Splendor was posted in the crew area of the ship and spotted by an eagle-eyed passenger on one of the behind-the-scenes tour.

Naturally questions have been asked as to why this information is made public to the crew and if this affects the service these passengers receive (is this the Spit List? asks one Cruise Critic member, hopefully tongue firmly in cheek!).

Carnival Cruise Lines is one of very few cruise brands that has the pre-pay option. Royal Caribbean and Celebrity Cruises are others, and also Azamara Cruises, but there you can't opt out.

This list - and leaving it where passengers might see it - certainly makes Carnival look bad, but it is only the passengers who did not pre-pay gratuities, not those who have asked to opt out of tipping altogether by having the daily service charge removed from their cruise accounts (this is charged to passengers who do not pre-pay, but they can ask for it to be removed or for the amount to be reduced or increased).

The question is, is that list somewhere also for all the crew to see?

I'm sure a fair few passengers just don't want to pay tips at all but some - and I am one - will have opted out of pre-paying because they prefer to receive a service before they tip for it.

Either way, it shows something really needs to be done about this whole gratuities business. Cruiselines cling to it as a means of keeping fares competitive, but as with fixed dining, it's time for a change. And (most) have managed that after years of saying it could be done.

The best thing, of course, would be for all to bite the bullet and just build the service charge into the cruise fare. Job done, everyone is happy. Passengers who like to tip can still do so on an individual basis, those who don't, no longer have to worry about it.

Of course, we would need a ruling from on high to make everyone toe the line and not use it to gain competitive advantage at the expense of the crew, and it would have to work in all countries. But I'm sure it can be done.

The other alternative is for them all to follow Costa Cruises and simply make the service charge compulsory. It's added on to the account at the end of the cruise (so you're not paying in advance) and if you don't like it, tough.

Well, almost tough. Whether you like it or not, you have to pay on board and be prepared to put up a damn good fight from home if you want it removed. I imagine Costa hopes most people won't be bothered; I suspect they are right.

When they find out my job, everyone on Queen Mary 2 wants to know how the cruise industry is doing given the recession.

Not too badly at all, if news from Regent Seven Seas Cruises is anything to go by.

Regent is reporting a 41% increase in call volumes between January and May this year compared to the same period in 2008, and a 48% increase in bookings in the same five months, again versus 2008. May was the cruise line's highest-ever booking month.

That's not bad given the constant financial gloom and doom, but these record-breaking results have not come without a price for Regent.

Passengers are being hooked with the offer of unlimited free excursions, which really is a fantastic deal when you consider many cost £80 per person and more, free flights on selected departures and cruise prices based on a generous $1.95 = £1 exchange rate.

The key question is whether the high demand can be maintained when we get out of the recession, cruise lines try to get prices back to normal and the lucrative incentives disappear.

After all, it's easy to cut prices, but much harder to increase them.

It is always possible that new passengers tempted by the offers to try an ultra-luxury all-inclusive cruise line - and I'm guessing there are quite few of them - find they just don't want to go back to the pay-as-you-go drinks system, in which case Regent is laughing.

Alternatively, if those new passengers disappear along with the incentives, might there be a chance Regent will look at ways to keep the free excursions, making the line truly all-inclusive and giving it an edge on its rivals?

Then there is ultra-lux rival Crystal Cruises, which is offering $2,000 per couple on-board credit to get people booking. Might there be a chance they will switch to all-inclusive if they find passengers rather like getting free drinks after all (soft drinks are free on Crystal, but you pay for alcohol)?

There could be some interesting times ahead.

They say things come in threes so I guess we shouldn't be surprised to discover another passenger went overboard from a Carnival ship.

Tampa Bay Online says a search was initiated in the Gulf of Mexico earlier this week after a passenger on Carnival Holiday reported hearing a splash. It's believed the victim was a 50-year-old woman.

TBO says it's the second such incident in less than a month, but it's actually the third. As I reported only today, a man went overboard from Inspiration this week and was found clinging to a buoy.

The trouble with a four-night cruise is that there is just not enough time to report from the ship. I got off Holland America Line's Eurodam in Dover early yesterday (Friday) morning and have a day at home to get myself organised and am then off again.

But more on that later.

Eurodam is a nice ship. I thought so when I saw it in Southampton last year and have not been disappointed this time around. It's a comfortable size, certainly not overwhelming, with some nice design features.

I loved these bar stools and the cabanas pictured below, which are by the pool. The pool area itself It has a roof that opens when the weather is nice. Must admit I was amused to see they had opened it on our cruise, when it really wasn't very warm - so everyone was wrapped up under their towels!

You can rent these cabanas by the day - $30 a day on a port day, $50 a day on a sea day, which buys you this private area (you can shut the curtains), an iPod with pre-selected music, the towels and bathrobes, chilled bottled water, a fuit basket, glass of house champagne, chocolate covered strawberries and more.

I was surprised how well used they were, even on our cruise, especially give the weather was so overcast. It's not cheap and you would feel you have to stay there all day to get your money's worth. I'm afraid I would find that too boring.

I am less sure about these other cabanas, higher up the ship and with a view of, well, the retractable roof. Surely it makes more sense to book a cabin or suite with a balcony and sit on that - at least you get a view of the sea.

I was also intrigued by this - as in why did anyone think it looked nice? There were several suggestions as to what it looks like, some of them not printable in a family blog. You almost expect it to start moving.

The thing that disappointed me most though, was the service. I have already reported that my cabin didn't get turned down the first night (it did subsequent evenings, I'm pleased to say, but was never made up in the mornings until well, the afternoon).

I should add here that it really doesn't matter to me personally if it is or isn't turned down. I can switch off lights, shut curtains and turn down the bed myself. But the point is that these things should happen automatically on a premium cruise line.

Most of the crew were charming and polite, with a cheery hello if you passed them on the stairs, but every now and then there was one that let the side down, forgetting that a smile and "hello" is a nice way to greet someone who is about to spend money with you. That was a shame.

One of Holland America's proudest features is its culinary arts centre, where chefs put on "how-to" demos. Our cruise had guest chef Jeremy Bloor, top man at the OXO Tower in London, on board to show off his cookery skills.

The kitchens are impressive - apparently they cost $1 million each to install - but they do need a chef with the gift of the gab to get the show going. HAL should see if Jamie Oliver fancies a cruise with the family!

Inevitably, the norovirus outbreak on Marco Polo last week has sparked a "how clean is your ship" debate on Cruise.co.uk. You can read the official cruise ship inspection scores and pick up tips on how to have a healthy cruise.

Reading the comments, it's amazing how paranoid people are and what lurid tales they have. I wonder how they dare to go on a cruise. And how do they get on at home, where there are no crew washing and cleaning day and night to keep surfaces clean?

Personally I have a theory that one of the problems generally is that we are all so clean these days that our systems have no immunity when faced with a dirty bug.

Not that I'm advocating we all give up washing or cleaning, you understand. For my part, I never touch the bannisters on a ship (if it's rocky, an steadying elbow or sleeve does the trick) and am very careful opening public toilet doors, having seen too many people who do not wash their hands. Sad to say, while the kids are often blamed, it is usually the older women who don't bother.

I have to say I have been very impressed with the way Bremen-based Transocean Tours has handled the outbreak on Marco Polo, with regular updates on what is happening and no attempt to cover up the severity of the outbreak.

The latest news is that Marco Polo arrived in Tilbury this morning and will be cleaned from stem to stern, inspected and hopefully cleared to depart as planned on July 14 for a 12-night Baltic cruise.

Yesterday, all passengers on the curtailed cruise - the ship had been moored up at Invergordon since Monday July 6, when the bug struck, and have now just returned to Tilbury - were told they will get a full refund of the cost of the cruise, a refund for all their beverage expenses and a 50% off voucher to put against another Marco Polo cruise from the UK.

The company has also said it will continue investigating the cause of the virus outbreak, which is quite unusual in the summer. Suppose they find a passenger brought it on, which is highly likely. Someone is going to feel awful.

A genuine question here. Can anyone tell me why you have to register with reception, sorry guest services, if you plan to carry your luggage off the ship at the end of the cruise?

All cruise ships want you off asap so they can get ready for the next lot of passengers, so why make a big deal if someone is prepared to get off themselves? Are they really ever going to insist you can't leave? I don't think so.

Holland America Line was the last ship I was on where it was "a must", but they all do it. I was given this slip (at least it says disembarkation and not the awful de'bark the Americans usually use), which had to be shown at the gangway as I left.

Guess what? None of the crew at the gangway on Eurodam was in the slightest bit interested that I was leaving the ship and certainly no one asked to see the piece of paper. So it can join the pile of others I have at home (that is a joke - I'm really not that sad!).

Holland America is adopting an eco-friendly Express Docs ticketing system on September 1, cutting out the need to send passengers bulky ticket holders whose sole purpose is to make a corporate statement on behalf of the individual cruiseline. Plastic? Oh dear. Leather-look? Must be good.

Under the new system, agents (or passengers if you book direct) will be notified by email that Express Docs have been issued. The email has a link to a website to complete an on-line check-in form. Once done, an express boarding pass and e-ticket can be printed.

Everyone booked on the cruise then has to turn up at the port with a print-out of the boarding pass and at least one e-ticket per cabin. Luggage tags, to attach to bags so they can be delivered to the correct cabin, will be available at the port.

The only exception is those booked on a Grand Voyage or Alaska CruiseTour, who carry on as now.

But how simple is all that? And eco-friendly, with no wasted paper and no fuel expended getting documents delivered around the country.

This sort of change is long overdue - after all I can check in for a British Airways flight on line and just turn up at the airport with a passport and printed boarding pass; so why not for a cruise?

Instead, invariably before each cruise I receive a fat wallet stuffed with mountains of paper, which usually goes straight for recycling as I really don't need to be told how to get on and off a ship, what to wear or how to pack. Yes I cruise a lot, but I suspect most people can work these things out for themselves. As for luggage labels. How many bags do they think one person needs for a seven-night cruise?

At the end of the day, all you need to take is the cruise ticket and that's what goes in my bag.

I have to say Lindblad Expeditions, with whom I've just cruised in Svalbard, is the worst culprit, not only sending me reams of paper about the cruise, much of it useless as it applied to the American travellers, but then sending the exact same information in a separate wallet and in a separate envelope to my daughter. And both had to come across the Atlantic.

Some have already chaged to a more eco-friendly system, but ironically, the best cruise lines often earn their stars because they forgot to send me the paperwork!

In May, my family and I turned up in Southampton for a cruise on Ventura without a ticket (I actually thought it was part of the excursion booklet so hadn't bothered chasing) or any luggage labels. Guess what? There was a man at a desk in front of the terminal handing out labels and they managed to check me and my family in without a ticket.

Just shows, it can be done. So let's see if they can't all start to do it.

It was good to read a review from, oh dear, an elderly person, giving a personal account of what happened on Marco Polo when the norovirus bug struck earlier this month.

She talks of an "immaculate" ship pre-bug, with a crew that spent their days cleaning and polishing, and says she has nothing but admiration for their patience and understanding after everyone started to get ill.

She mentions their efforts to change bedding, fumigate cabins, make sure no one touched surfaces in the buffet (which was suspended) or around the tea and coffee stations to try to stop the spread, and she has special praise for Richard Sykes, the cruise director, for his efforts to keep everyone informed and organising entertainment and extra activities.

Almost all the comments following, some from people who were also on the ship at the same time, likewise have nothing but praise for the ship, crew and Richard Sykes as well.

People on board Marco Polo when the bug hit were well compensated, it's true - and swiftly, by the sound of it - so they have no grudge to bear, but how refreshing to hear from cruisers prepared to acknowledge the good side of their holiday as well.

Law firm Irwin Mitchell has taken up the case of 17 passengers on a Thomson Spirit cruise in May who were struck down by norovirus.

It's the same-old story. Passengers get ill on a cruise and their holiday is ruined, so they seek compensation. If they are lucky they get a good hand-out - good enough for them to afford another cruise with the same line that have just accused of lacking hygiene standards.

What interested me more when digging around on the Irwin Mitchell site was the following statement by Vivien Sadler from Notttingham on Marco Polo, which was recently so badly hit by norovirus that the cruise had to be cancelled.

A tolerant soul clearly, she has usefully found a way to stop these outbreaks.

"I am extremely upset as it appears they continued to allow elderly people to board the ship despite knowing how vulnerable they are to illnesses such as Norovirus."

So there you are. Ban elderly people because they get ill. Wonder how that will go down at Fred Olsen, Swan Hellenic - and Transocean Tours, which runs Marco Polo for that matter - given "elderly people" are their bread and butter.

This might be of interest for anyone yet to book a cruise this year.

Norwegian Cruise Line has launched a sale offering not just a few healthy savings on cruises themselves, but also up to $150 credit to spend on board as well.

It's not a huge amount given the poor exchange rate it's true, but as a supermarket insists on telling us, "Every little helps".

The sale goes on until the end of August, but you'll have to move quick to get the spending money as that's only available when you book through a travel agent before the end of July. And that's on Friday!

There are sale tags on cruises in the Caribbean, Mediterranean, Panama and South America, with up to £830 per person off a 14-night Caribbean Panoramas sailing in December from Miami. The price now is from £1,479 excluding flights.

You can also get £370 per person off a seven-night Western Med cruise in November from Barcelona. It's now £539 per person, or £77 a day and for that you get the flight as well.

In the latest Cruise.co.uk ratings, Thomson not only comes top for entertainment, but also holds poll position for best food and best crew.

In fact, in the entertainment category, Thomson has three ships in the top five, while in the best crew section, it holds first, second and third place. Quite a result.

As ever with this type of poll, one has to be a bit circumspect and the results do tend to change with the wind so when you look it could all be a bit different. Nevertheless, it gives an indication of what each line is doing well.

Thomson also comes second in the cruiselines top 10. Here's the full table:

1 - Cunard

2 - Thomson Cruises

3 - Princess Cruises

4 - Ocean Village

5 - P&O Cruises

6 - Royal Caribbean International

7 - Celebrity Cruises

8 - Fred Olsen Cruise Lines

9 - Island Cruises

10 - Norwegian Cruise Line

Interesting to see Ocean Village at number 4. The cruiseline is being disbanded by Carnival UK apparently because it couldn't be made to pay. If only all the people who liked it so much had been prepared to pay a bit more for their flycruise it would have survived.

Or would it? Cruise Critic says P&O Cruises has been asking passengers what they would think if it were to offer flycruises from, say, Palma and Crete. Rather as Ocean Village does.

Could it be that Ocean Village had to go, to make room for P&O?

A bill that would require all cruise ships to install security latches and peep-holes in cabin doors has passed a US Senate committee.

If it becomes law, it would also require all crimes that occur on board cruise ships to be reported to the Coast Guard and Federal Bureau of Investigations and for ship physicians to be trained to handle sexual assault examinations.

It seems there is an International Cruise Victims Association and that it has been pressing for a law like this for some time, but it has never happened because the Cruise Lines International Associaton, the industry body in the US, wouldn't support it.

Now CLIA has changed its mind and is giving its backing to the need for legislation, which would be wrapped up in the Cruise Vessel Security and Safety Act of 2009.

Travel Agent Central says its position has been changed by recent recent incidents of missing persons and sexual assaults, making many question cruise lines' security.

It's a sad day for the cruise industry if ever this does become law, which apparently is now very likely.

One of cruising's big selling points is that it is so safe. Elderly single women too nervous to go on other holiday will go on cruises because they feel safe, families take their kids on ships because they recognise it is a safe environment and one in which the children can have quite a bit of freedom.

Peep holes in doors, security latches and physicians trained to examine passengers claiming sexual assault tells a different story.

There have been a lot of cases recently of people going overboard, most recently the suspected suicide who went over the side of Holland America's Zaandam while in Alaska, but legislation is not going to stop that.

I don't know whether to laugh or cry at the following quote from Senator John Kerry, the bill's sponsor.

"Murky lines of jurisdiction are no longer an excuse for risking the safety of millions of Americans who will board cruise ships this year."

Risking the safety of millions of Americans? Just which planet is he on?

The Boston Globe reports on new figures from The Cruise Lines International Association that show the number of Americans cruising last year dropped 1.7%.

The paper also says that for the first time since CLIA started publishing stats, the number of ships setting sail from US ports fell year on year. In 2004, US embarkations accounted for 77% of all cruises. In 2008, that had fallen to 69%.

Despite the US downturn, the number of people cruising worldwide grew to 13.05 million, an increase of 4%. That's in large part thanks to Europe, where passenger numbers keep on growing.

The number of Brits taking a cruise last year rose 11% to close to 1.5 million, while 4.7 million passengers joined their cruise at a European port - a 68% increase since 2005. In comparison, CLIA reports that the number of people taking a cruise originating in the US was down 1.7% to about 9.3 million passengers.

As for all those missing ships? They are over here. The number of cruise ships operating in Europe in 2008 was up 35% compared to 2005, to a total 192, according to the European Cruise Council.

To quote Carnival UK chief executive David Dingle from a conference a couple of years ago, "cruising lights are coming on all over Europe". Great stuff, but the industry does need the US market to recover as well if it is to fill all the big new ships coming along and start to make money again.

I was reminded of fellow cruise blogger Captain Greybeard yesterday as I sat through the muster drill on Crystal Serenity.

In the traditional way of muster drills, the alarm sounded, the signal for my daughter and I to take our lifejackets from our Penthouse and head to our muster station.

We were all required to be wearing them before we entered the muster station - in our case the show lounge - and looking neat, too, with straps tucked away in the side because of course that makes a difference if the ship is sinking.

Why then, after explaining this was where we should come in the event of an emergency, was there a demonstration of how to put on a lifejacket? I mention this in connection with Crystal Cruises, but this is what most cruise lines do.

And why did I think of the Captain? He mentioned the aircraft safety drill, telling you how to buckle and unbuckle your seat belt. This is done, as I am sure you all know, when the aircraft is taxi-ing to the runway and the cabin stewards and stewardesses (or girls and boys if you are flying with Virgin) have checked that everyone's seat belt is done up!

The safety drill is always a bit of a thorny issue - important for first-time cruisers, a pain in the posterior for regulars, not because it takes very long but because we've heard it all before. Basically, it's a bit of a bore.

It's like the aircraft safety demo, which we are asked to watch because every plane is different. Really? I'm no expert but I've noticed they all have emergency exits, floor lighting, seat belts. lifejackets under the seats and oxygen in the panels above, so which bit exactly is different?

When I was on P&O Cruises' Ventura in May, I remember looking along the length of the ship from the Metropolis Bar on deck 18 and wondering who would go down to decks three, four, five, etc, to fetch a lifejacket if the ship was sinking - or actually in any emergency?

Presumably that same thought prompted the changes now happening on Royal Caribbean and Celebrity Cruises, which the Captain mentioned and which I also experienced on Celebrity Equinox the other day.

Instead of going to their cabin to fetch their lifejacket and then finding their way to the muster drill, passengers are now instructed to go straight to the muster station, where lifejackets will be waiting.

It's a sound idea and one that will catch on across the industry I am sure. I can't imagine the panic as passengers, told there is an emergency, try to find their way back to their cabin. After all, many people, who are perfectly intelligent on land, have enough problems trying to find ther rooms under normal circumstances. So how much more sensible to get them to the muster area and then kit them out with a lifejacket.

On Equinox, we were supposed to watch a safety video on a screen. Good idea. Except I couldn't see the screen for the sea of taller people in front of me. Then there was a demo of how to put on a lifejacket. Fine, as none of us was wearing one. Except again, I couldn't even see the guy doing the demo, let alone see how to do it.

It didn't matter for me as I know after years of mustering, but what if I had been a first-timer? I reckon they will have to start mustering people in their stations according to height.

Or would that be considered sizeist?

Some good news for single travellers from Costa Cruises. The cruiseline is cutting its single supplement for all cruises departing after December 1.

Currently, all lone travellers cruising with Costa pay a straight 80% supplement. Under the new system, soloists will pay a 30% supplement - but only if they book in advance. As the departure date nears, the supplement will increase to a maximum 100%. So higher than it is at the moment, which is not great.

But at least early-booking singles will be able to get a bit of a bargain, which has to be good for all those people who have to travel alone and invariably get stung for the privilege unless they are travelling with the likes of Fred Olsen, Saga or Spirit of Adventure.

Only last week, when I was on Crystal Serenity, I was trying to explain the logic of charging one person twice for occupying a cabin alone. And that was to a couple, so they were not affected by the supplement but were struggling to understand how that was fair.

Judging from the looks on their faces they were still baffled after I had finished explaining. "So they don't get anything extra but pay double?"

Sounds crazy when you put it like that, doesn't it?

If anyone doubted the continued interest in cruising, consider these two events being held in honour of holidays at sea over the next few months.

National Cruise Week is from September 20-27, when agents up and down the country will be running special promotions and holding cruise events.

A perfect time for anyone who is not sure to find out more and for everyone to book their cruise.

Then in March 2010, the Cruise show is back after an hugely successful debut in 2009.

It's on March 27-28 and this time it's being held at London's Olympia in Kensington with new attractions including a rock-climbing courtesy of Royal Caribbean International, and a Blue Guide Wall, where cruise lines can post offers and visitors can put up reviews.

There'll be expert advice for regular and first-time cruisers, and a Champagne bar and casino - playing with show dollars - so you can start to feel as you really are already at sea!

Royal Caribbean had a terrific show last year, which is no doubt why it is back, but more than 20 cruiselines are already signed up including Celebrity Cruises, Carnival Cruise Lines, Holland America Line, P&O Cruises, Princess Cruises and Cunard.

Tickets cost £6 in advance or £8 at the door. Book here or call 0871 230 7147.

Rumours are flying that Carnival Corp is close to ordering new ships and that Princess Cruises is in the frame for a new-build.

If it's true, I'm guessing it won't be one as that doesn't make financial sense so you can be sure at least two more little Princesses are on the way - or big Princesses more likely given the last new Princess ships were Ruby, Emerald and Crown, each with capacity for just over 3,000 passengers.

Given all the investment Princess has been making in its ships of late, adding adult-only Sanctuary spaces and piazza-like atriums, you can also be sure that any new ships would have these signature features.

I'm not surprised at the new-build rumours. I reported in Travel Weekly a few weeks ago that shipyards are facing empty order books from 2012 and are getting desperate for business. And desperation, as we have seen with all the discounting on the high street during the recession, does wonders for prices as far as buyers are concerned.

I suggested that if cruiselines believe the industry will continue to grow, as they say they do, they need to order new tonnage. And now, with prices down, would seem a good time.

UBS equity analyst Robin Farley says shipbuilding prices in euros now are at the same level as five years ago and that Carnival ordered ships at those prices in the past.

If the orders are placed this year, we would start to see the new ships from 2012.

... who has the youngest fleet of all?

No doubt about it, says Peter Shanks, president and managing director of Cunard, who is launching a new logo with the words "youngest fleet in the world" for the line's marketing material.

But wait, what's this on the Norwegian Cruise Line website? A claim to have the youngest fleet on the planet (clearly the world is not enough).

And this on the MSC Cruises website? "The most modern fleet in the world." "Modern" is not the same as age, it's true, but it's quite clear what they mean as underneath it says their ships have an average age of five years.

Who is right? More to the point, do cruisers really care?

When to book your cruise is one of those million-dollar questions. Do you book as soon as the cruise is announced and get a decent early-booking discount or wait until the last minute in the hpe of a better deal.

It's a question that has been taxing Mr Walsh, one of Reader Offers' clients after he went on Queen Mary 2. He had a great cruise but was "disappointed" to meet others on board, in the same type of cabin, who had booked late and paid several hundred pounds less than he and his wife and received $200 on-board credit into the bargain.

He asks Reader Offers' managing director Peter Beadles when he should book the Queen Victoria cruise he wants to do next year, which is almost unanswerable. There may be some great late deals, but who knows? And what's the use of a great deal anyway if it's for a cruise you don't want or an inside cabin when you want a balcony?

But now Saga has come to the rescue of people like Mr Walsh with a new price promise. If the price of a cruise comes down, the lower price will also apply to everyone, including those already booked. Saga also promises there will be no fuel or currency surcharges once a cruise is booked.

It's about as fair as it gets, but not a huge help for Readers Offers, as Saga sells direct to its clients, not through travel agents.

Maybe others could follow its lead though? It would make it so much easier for Peter and I to give proper advice to people who ask - and get those early bookings rolling in.

This is a strange tale, and certainly not a lot of fun, from the line that likes to calls its vessels the Fun Ships.

Chris Harvey and family were stopped when disembarking from Carnival Freedom at the end of their cuise, taken back to their cabin and accused - very nicely, apparently - of causing damage to the edge of the desk.

They were given two options - accept responsibility (which no doubt really meant give us some money to pay for the damage) or be banned from Carnival for life.

Now I don't know about anyone else, but I've often noticed minor damage in the cabins I'm staying in - a mark on a carpet, a scuff on the desk - and never really thought too much about it. I will now. In fact, after this I imagine everyone will be rushing round taking pictures before their luggage is unpacked to use as evidence. Just in case.

Anyway, back to the Harveys. They were adamant they had not caused the damage (and later found a picture taken early on in the cruise that proved they were telling the truth) so they chose to be banned.

When they got home, Chris posted their experiences (and the picture) on line. The story was picked up by a US journalist, who contacted Carnival for a comment. Within an hour, the line had apologised and the ban was lifted.

The thing is, having been treated like that, do they really want to cruise with Carnival again? After all, there are plenty more ships in the sea.

The winning cruiselines might love it and it might make a story for the papers but at least one person is totally unimpressed with the latest results from Cruise.co.uk's regular survey of the "best" cruise lines and their ships, food, entertainment and service.

"...it must be said that some of its results are highly dubious. For example, for "best cruise line" the ranking was Cunard, Thomson, Ocean Village and Princess. No mention at all of Crystal, Regent, Seabourn or Silversea. Since when did Ocean Village become the third best cruise line in the world (or even in the UK)?"

Mark Tre of Cybercruises, who wrote this, points out, as I have in the past, that the scoring is highly flawed, biased in favour of the lines that atttract the most reviews.

Take that best cruise line category, where Cunard came top, Thomson second and Ocean Village and Princess were equal third.

"How anyone might accept that Thomson could ever be the second best cruise line and that Ocean Village ties with Princess for third is ludicrous .... surely "best" is not the way to decribe these results. "Most popular" would be more like it."

I have to say I totally agree. Or maybe be even more specific - "most popular among the Brits".

The piece continues, dissecting the best food, best service and best accommodation categories, and finally concluding that the whole thing is a publicity exercise for Cruise.co.uk.

Surprise surprise.

But it succeeded. Even the Telegraph and Travel Weekly (not written by me!) ran with the story. And let's face it, so did Mark Tre, whoever he might be!

One of the most interesting comments to come out of this week's Cruise Forum at the Travel Convention in Barcelona is the news that Royal Caribbean International is "evaluating" its tipping policy for the UK market.

Robin Shaw, Royal's UK & Ireland vice-president and managing director, was adamant that they are always evaluating everything, but it seems something might be happening on the tipping front because as a result of the mean old Brits' refusal to tip, crew are not earning the kind of money they have come to love and expect from the Americans.

It's an issue for the cruiseline whatever that sailing, but an even bigger one when it has ships cruising from the UK packed with non-tipping Brits. This year, that means Independence of the Seas and Celebrity Cruises' new ship Celebrity Equinox, both be sailing from Southampton from April 2010.

Interestingly, I'd highlighted gratuities as one of the things Brits really don't like about cruising in my Q&A session at the forum, just before Shaw took part in a panel discussion, and to prove the point I read out a few quotes from people. This sums up the general feeling nicely:

"Trust me, all you have to do to find out how to remove the prepaid tips is sit near to reception for the first and last three days of your cruise. Here you will find 85% of all cruisers removing their pre-paids. People don't want to be told how to tip on a cruiseline the same way people wouldn't accept pre-paid tips on a taxi fare. There is a waiting list to serve on a cruise ship and at every port of call you can hardly get on the shuttle buses for staff carying cases of beer and bottles of spirits. They are hardly starving."

What could Royal Caribbean do? Well your guess is as good as mine, but building gratuities into the cruise price and selling the holiday as including all meals, entertainment AND gratuities makes most sense to me.

And then they could take the 15% charge off drinks as well so you can help yourself to a beer or Coke from the minibar without paying a tip to, well, who? The man whose job it is to stock the minibars, I suppose.

Sure, people would have to accept they must pay a little more for their cruise, but in return they wouldn't have the embarassment of having to go to reception to ask for their tips to be removed. Passenger is happy, crew are happy, cruise line is happy.

Royal Caribbean would get lots of credit and then all the other cruiselines that use tips as a way to remunerate their crew could follow suit.

I fear it is all but a dream. But it was a nice one.

Every destination has its day. Unfortunately for Alaska, this would appear neither its day, month nor year - or two.

True, Disney is sending a ship there for 2011, but one ship in against the fact that Carnival Corporation, which has a weighty presence in the 49th State through Princess Cruises and Holland America Line, has already reduced capacity for 2010. and is considering pulling more ships out? And that Norwegian Cruise Line and Royal Caribbean International have also cut capacity for 2010?

I would not like to be involved in the tourism industry there right now.

Carnival Corp chairman Mickey Arison blames the high cost of doing business in Alaska for the fact that more of ships could be pulled. He reckons the vessels can make more money elsewhere. It's understandable then, but a shame.

I had a great cruise in Alaska a few years ago with Princess. It's something very different from the Mediterranean and Caribbean, and surprisingly foreign - even the Americans on my cruise found it so - given it is actually part of the US.

But destinations come and go. Just look at what is happening to Antarctica. It was the must-go place for a few years, but now it's on the way down because those who wanted to go have been and it is very expensive, both for passengers and cruise lines. Result? Voyages of Discovery and Spirit of Adventure have left already, Swan Hellenic will be quitting after this winter.

I have no doubt it will bounce back, just as Alaska will, but it will take a few years and a fresh generation of cruisers to come along looking for something new.

The $50 head tax Alaska imposed on cruise passengers has been cited as a key reason for its downturn. It probably didn't help, but are we seriously to believe that people who could afford to go on a cruise there, with all the attendant flying, could not afford an extra $50 per person tax?

The Alaska Cruise Association has filed a lawsuit challenging the tax, presumably hoping that if it is repealed people will flood back. Somehow I doubt it. Not for a while anyway.

I expect we'll be hearing more of Arison's thoughts on the future of cruising in Alaska tomorrow, as well as many other cruise-related issues, when he takes to the stage on the opening day of the Travel Convention in Barcelona.

I will be there to hear what he says of course, and on Thursday I'll be on the stage myself, in my capacity as the Telegraph Travel's cruise corresponent, during the spin-off Cruise Forum on Royal Caribbean International's Navigator of the Seas.

My subject? What consumers like and don't like about cruising. If anyone has any thoughts for me to pass on to the cruise lines before then, do let me know.

I do hope the woman deemed responsible for the outbreak of a norovirus-like infection on Fred Olsen's Balmoral last month doesn't read Gene Sloan's Cruise Blog.

Suggestions as to what should happen to her range from sending her the bill for everyone's ruined cruise - the illness spread to more than 100 people and eventually the ship returned to Dover a day early so it could be thoroughly cleaned - to well, sending her the bill. Hit her in the wallet "pour encourager les autres", as the French would say.

It's a strange story in so much as Fred Olsen's marketing director Nigel Lingard has said publically that they identified the cause of the viral outbreak - a woman who came on in Dover. He also told the Scotman she had been spotted "sneaking out" of her cabin when she was supposed to be in quarantine.

It begs the question why she was allowed on the ship if she was unwell. Equally, why whoever saw her "sneak out" did not challenge her, or at least report the situation to the poeple in charge.

But let's leave that one for a moment. It's the comments on Sloan's story that made me smile - the 21st-century equivalent of being hung, drawn and quartered (and so much less messy).

"They should fine her carelessness"

"The inconsiderate b#%& should have to pay for everyone's cruise ... The only way people like this learn is through their wallet."

"A score of lashes and a lusty keelhauling clearly dictated!!! On a more practical tac... send the wench THE BILL!!!!!"

"I hope that this greedy, selfish hag gets a bill from the cruise line for the lost revenue and the additional expenses incurred by the passengers who had to disembark early."

Wonder if Fred will circulate her details to other cruise lines, as insurance companies do when they have identified a fraudster? Either way, I suspect it will be a long time before she dares to show her face on a Fred Olsen ship again!

Well two of them actually, but it's nothing to do with smashing bottles of bubbly.

Costa Cruises is asking passengers to vote for the pair of names they prefer for the next two ship launching, in 2011 and 2012.

There are 25 pairs to choose from - Flora and Fauna (honest), Viva and Vera (I kid you not). Perla and Cristallo (sounds like a classy clothes joint but I rather like it) and Favolosa and Meravigliosa.

Favolosa and Meravigliosa. Really?

Maybe it's my pronounciation, but they sound uncannily like Meraviglia and Favolosa - the names MSC Cruises came up with for the new ships it planned build after MSC Magnifica (but which for the moment are on hold).

They do say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Here's an offer us tip-hating Brits just can't refuse.

Oceania Cruises is not just cutting prices by up to 60% on selected cruises this winter but it is also paying your gratuities.

As Oceania recommends $12.50 per person per day (automatically added to the bill) plus another $4 per person per day if you have a butler, you can see this is worth quite a lot of money.

These are the cruises. You get free speciality dining, soft drinks and bottled water for these prices but no flights. The single supplement is just 25%.

* February 8 2010. Sydney to Bangkok - 21 nights from $2,793 (about £1,799) per person.

* February 22 2010. Buenos Aires to Valparaiso - 13 nights from $2,704 (about (£1,699) per person. 

* March 7 2010. Valparaiso to Rio - 27 nights from $3,375 (about £2,149) per person.

* March 1 2010 - Beijing to Bangkok - 24 nights from $3,000 (about £1,899) per person.

* April 9 2010. Hong Kong to Athens - 35 nights from $4,375 (about £2,799) per person.

All these prices include a savings of up to 60%. For more information see your local cruise travel agent, check out the the website or call Oceania Cruises on 0845 505 1920.

An interesting story from Bloomberg quotes Royal Caribbean Cruises chief exective officer Richard Fain as saying that by 2011 or 2012, the cruise line will have more international than American passengers.

"Within a year or two ... we will be more international than US in both revenue and passenger cruise days ... All of our growth at this point is coming from overseas."

It certainly explains why the cruise line is investing so heavily in markets outside the US. Not just the UK and Europe, but it also has a growing programme in Asia and the Far East, and is also now dabbling in South America.

At the moment, 60% of all Royal's passengers are from the US.

Fain said Royal Caribbean has begun raising prices in some markets, including Europe, and added that there are no immediate plans to order new vessels.

In a shipful of unusual features, the studio cabins on Norwegian Cruise Line's new ship Norwegian Epic seem to be causing the most debate.

These are inside cabins, just 100 square feet in size but with a window out on to the corridor and access to a two-storey communal living area where there will be a bar, two TV screens and a concierge.

David Molyneaux, writing in the St Louis Today, reckons NCL has started a race among cruise lines to offer the best budget inside cabins, citing Royal Caribbean International's inside cabins with a view onto the Royal Promenade as opposition.

But they are not really in the same league. As he himself says, these are "crash-pads", aimed at budget-conscious travellers who just want a place to sleep. Or should that be party?

I admit these would not suit me as I like real daylight and lots of space, but they are a brilliant idea. After all, Epic will have a ship-within-a-ship-villa complex at the top of the ship for those with money, so why not these studio pads for those without it? They are also ideal for single cruisers as they will meet up with others as a matter of course in the living room.

I see that most cruise.co.uk contributors agree there are plenty of people out there who would be happy to stay in one of these. Guess all we have to do now is wait and see what NCL tells us about the booking figures.

Or maybe some agents reading this can give us some feedback on levels of interest. I'd love to know.

The Cruise Vessel Safety and Security Act of 2009, requiring more transparency when it comes to reporting cruise ship crime, has been passed by the House of Representatives.

The bill, which will also require peepholes and security latches on cabin doors, and sets a minimum height for ships' railings, now goes to the Senate for a vote.

There are all sorts of other requirements under the bill, including deploying new technology, when it is available, to detect passengers who fall overboard. Fall overboard? You'd have to have really plan well to "fall" overboard from a cruise ship these days.

As I've made my thoughts about this bill known already, I'll leave you instead with some comments in Travel Weekly US.

"With 10% unemployment, foreclosures going through the roof and billions being proposed for forced medical insurance and Congress spends time on this kind of nonsense."

"...there really is nothing much in the bill preventing another sexual assault which appears as [Congresswomen Doris Matsui's] motive for introducing it. So one looks thru the peep hole and sees room service or a cabin steward, unlocks the deadbolt, opens the door and is assaulted by one bad apple out of 100,000 crew members..."

"I daresay more young women have been assaulted at land-based resorts at a much greater rate than on a cruise ship. There's a price tag for all of these "nanny state" laws and the consumer will pay for essentially nothing better than what exists today..."

Last Friday evening I was glued to my computer, listening to a live Norwegian Cruise Line webcast about the entertainment on Norwegian Epic.

I admit I wasn't enthralled with the Blue Man Group, which is going to be performing eight times per cruise on Epic. It's great to have something different on a cruise ship, but I caught a taste of their performance during the "reveal" in New York in May and felt quite queasy (!) watching what they did with what I think were marshmallows.

I'm not saying more - you'll have to go on board to find out!

But on to Friday's news. There will be duelling pianos in a late-night rock-and-roll show called Howl at the Moon, which is performed at 14 venues across the US and will be playing four times per cruise, and Legends in Concert, a tribute show that plays in Las Vegas among other US cities.

I'm not usually a fan of someone pretending to be a big star because too often they don't have even the physical presence to carry it off, never mind the voice, but judging by the website the "Legends" at least have to look like the people they are playing.

I'll have to wait until I go on board the ship, which launches next July, to judge if they sound like them as well, but I reckon both shows look really fun and exciting.

During the webcast, NCL's entertainment's chief Richard Kilman said his goal is to change the face of cruise ship entertainment on the 4,200-passenger Norwegian Epic.

Wouldn't it be nice if, in so doing, he changed the face of cruise ship entertainment per se and we were able finally to put to rest the dire songs from the shows.

Every recession has a silver lining, it seems, For Yachts of Seabourn and Silversea, it's that the hefty discounts they have been offering has tempted a new, younger crowd to come cruise with them.

Pam Conover, Seabourn's CEO, says the average age on new ship Seabourn Odyssey, which launched in June this year, was 45 years compared to 55 years for the line overall, while the ratio of first-time guests was two-thirds higher than the cruise line's norm. New cruisers, younger people. It's what all the cruise lines want.

During World Travel Market this month, I chaired a cruise session and a similar message came out. To paraphrase: "yes, we're discounting, but those discounts are encouraging new people to cruise with us and once they start, they won't stop".

Is that wishful thinking? I don't think so. All the cruise lines have repeat factors that other travel companies would die for simply because once people take their first voyage, they are hooked. It's getting them the first time that is the challenge.

Lots has changed in cruising to do just that - the more relaxed dress codes, the introduction of open dining so passengers can dine when they want, the existence of speciality restaurants so people have a choice of where to eat, and so on.

Next thing to tackle, MSC Cruises' UK chairman Peter Pate told the packed audience at WTM, is the entertainment. How I agree. Fluff-and-feathers dance troupes singing songs from the shows have so had their day. Bring on - who was it you said Peter? - oh yes, Elton John. Now that would be a sell-out cruise and no one would have to discount.

Which top performer would you like to see on a cruise? Why not drop me a line. Who knows, you could influence the future of cruise ship entertainment!

Remember all the hype as National Cruise Week approached? We had stories from the Passenger Shipping Association about favourite ports. celebs you'd most like to cruise with, the great deals to be had from agents during the seven days and much more.

That was September. And what have we heard since about it? Zilch. That's despite a request to the PSA for some feedback from the event. "There isn't anything to report," is a rough translation of what I was eventually told.

I was a speaker at a meeting of Leading Cruise Agents earlier this month, talking about the benefits of PR, and asked how many of the attendees had done anything to promote themselves during National Cruise Week. Three hands went up.

Compare that to the World's Largest Cruise Night in the US in October. Travel Agent Central reports that when the books closed, the industry stood at about $45 million in sales from the massive marketing promotion, translating into agent commissions of approximately $6 million.

"Nearly 50,000 consumers attended WLCN cruise events held by a record 1,309 agencies this year. That's big - and agents have every reason to believe their cruise sales will get even bigger. It's the most reliable segment of the travel industry right now, and the cruise lines continue to enhance their offerings to attract travelers. Even your most reluctant clients may find themselves swayed by what's out there these days."

How can we be getting it so wrong?

How sad to read of the armed attacks that have forced cruise lines to suspend excursions in Nassau, in the Bahamas.

I was there in October with Disney Cruise Line and had a fantastic day out at Dolphin Encounters. I do hope that is not one of the excursions that has been hit. As it is on an island, out of the town, I suspect all is well.

At the time of choosing our excursions, I asked if we could do the Earth Village as well as the dolphins as I have always wanted a go on a Segway.

It never happened, I suspect because there was just not enough time, but it looks like that might have been a good thing as that is one of the trips that has been pulled by Disney and Royal Caribbean International.

As Nassau will now discover, it is easy to get a reputation for being unsafe, but very hard to get rid of it, no matter how many police you throw at the situation or reassurances you give. Look at what happened in Egypt after the shootings at Queen Hatshepsut's Temple in 1997.

It's very tough on all those people in Nassau who depend so heavily on the cruise ship visits for their income.

It's hardly great news for the cruise lines either, as Nassau is such a popular stop, especially for short cruises from Florida.

And Royal Caribbean must be extra worried. Nassau one of the very few ports in the Caribbean that the huge new Oasis of the Seas can get into (and then only because the authorities in Nassau have spent a fortune dredging the harbour to take the 225,000-ton giant).

With so few places the ship can visit, the last thing they need is to have to pull a port.

Regular readers will know I am not a great fan of the lifeboat drill on cruise ships. Not because it's a waste of time - on the contrary they are very important - or because I have done them so many times, although that doesn't help, but because the muster crew seem so determined to treat passengers like idiots.

"Your muster station is D3." Ah, yes. That'll be the number on the front of the lifejacket then. "Everyone take off your lifejackets as we will be doing a demonstration about how to put them on later in this muster." Right....

So I cannot praise Royal Caribbean enough for their new-style muster, which I experienced for the first time last week on Oasis of the Seas.

No rush to get back to your cabin to collect a lifejacket (in fact they no longer have lifejackets in the rooms) which is a good thing given the size of the ship, only to have to make your way back downstairs through crowds of people, either lost, chatting, bored or generally doing their best to avoid standing in lines. And then the lengthy roll-call of cabin numbers starts.

But that was then, and this is now on Royal Caribbean. You simply go, lifejacketless, to your muster station where your cruise card is scanned, sit down, watch a film that has all the salient bits but is quick and to the point and then off you go.

It really is that easy.

Not only that, but it is a more reliable way for the Captain to know, via the scanned cards, who has done the drill. More importantly, in case of a real emergency, passengers cards will be scanned as they get into the lifeboats so everyone is accounted for.

Heard the one about the new drinks packages now available on Celebrity Cruise ships? No, it's not the start of a joke, although many people clearly believe it is after looking at the prices.

The beer package costs from £20.75 per person per night, the spirits packages cost from £31 per person per night for the classic version, or £45.50 for the premium one. Both prices include gratuities (15% on each drink bought, regardless of whether it is served or you go to bar and get it yourself) and allow unlimited consumption during the cruise.

The packages can be bought ahead of the cruise, in pounds sterling (hence the "from" price I think as I'm assuming it depends on the exchange rate) or on board in dollars.

News of the packages has certainly caused a stir. Cruise Critic has helpfully worked out you'd need to drink between five and seven beers a day to get your money's worth, asks if it will cause "risky binging" and has had plenty of none-too-favourable comments from members.

Many of USA Today's Cruise Loggers likewise are not enthralled."Oh great, encourage the boozers to drink more," writes one. "The price of the package is so high, purchasers will inevitably work real hard to get their money's worth, and that is bad for everyone involved," writes another.

The packages certainly do look expensive, but how about if you split them between two? Against the rules I know, but is there really anything to stop the holder buying a drink, giving it to the wife, husband, partner, whoever, and then heading off to another bar (no point in being blatently obvious) to get another? They might be able to see on the till that you've just had a drink, but it would be a brave waiter who dared to suggest you join AA.

Unlimited beers for two for the duration of a cruise? Now that starts to look like good value.

My bigger problem with these packages are that they are too specific. I like a beer or two in the day, but a few glasses of wine in the evening, so I'd have buy-as-I-go, as I do now, which is expensive, especially when the gratuity is added to every drink, or purchase the Taste of the Vineyards package, which costs from £68.25.

They don't say how many bottles you get for that so I've no idea if it's good value. But I do know that if added to a beer package my pocket really would start to hurt. And that would be the time for Cruise Critic to really start worrying about binge drinking.

By the way, re USA Today. Am I the only one who wonders about the Cruise Logger who wrote:

"Everyone keeps talking about how much they would have to drink all day but all the prices refer to "PER NIGHT"!!! If this is only limited to nightime, that makes it rediculously (sic) expensive."

Is he for real? Has he really always thought that the daytime part of his cruise was free because he pays a per night rate? He's in for a nasty shock one day.

As all eyes were focused on Oasis of the Seas as it emerged from the shipyard in Finland and set off on across the Atlantic to its new home in Fort Lauderdale, a small comment went unnoticed on Royal Caribbean Cruises chairman and CEO Richard Fain's blog - almost.

He mentioned Royal Caribbean president and CEO Adam Goldstein insists the rooms in which passengers sleep be called "staterooms" and not "cabins" and says he doesn't understand Adam's "obsession" with which term is used.

I so agree. I have been pulled up many times by cruise lines for calling a spade a spade, or in this case a cabin a cabin. "They are staterooms," I am told. Really? Rooms of state? Inhabited by kings, queens, presidents and other persons of state?

Of course stateroom does make a cabin sound so much grander, which is why cruise lines prefer it, and I do use it now and then as it's a useful alternative to the "c" word.

What do you call the room in which passengers sleep? Why not let me know.

Before I cruised on Queen Mary 2 earlier this year, Cunard was always telling me how brilliant their lecture series was. Well they would say that, wouldn't they? But it was a good excuse for going on board and finding out.

When I was on in June we had a talk by art historian Christine Roussel, who was involved in the restoration of the Statue of Liberty and spoke about its history and the restoration project itself.

The talk was fascinating - did you know, for instance, that when raising money for the statue, they had the arm and torch in Madison Square Gardens in New York (50 cents to go up the torch) and the head in Paris (must have looked very odd!), where people could go to the top of the crown? - to a packed and enthralled audience. Her lecture became the talk of the ship for the rest of the cruise.

And then there was film historian Barry Brown, with his talks about some of the screen greats - David Niven, Ingrid Bergman, Alfred Hitchcock - that were all really interesting and came with lots of film clips to keep our attention.

Neither Christine nor Barry are famous names, but theirs were definitely the most interesting talks I have ever attended on a cruise ship, not just because of the subject matter but the way the way they were presented.

So I was interested to see that for its 2010 "Insights" lecture series, Cunard has gone for big hitters - Radio 4's Today programme presenter John Humphrys, broadcaster turned politician and man in white Martin Bell, honorary Brit and author Bill Bryson, comedy script writers Dick Clement and Ian le Frenais, psychosexual therapist Dr Ruth and motor racing broadcaster Murray Walker.

And then there's the really big one, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, who will be talking as Queen Mary 2 sails from Port Louis in Mauritius to Cape Town in South Africa in March.

"We are confident our passengers will be transfixed by what he has to say," says Cunard president and managing director Peter Shanks. I am sure they will, and also by what the other speakers listed here have to say as well, but so much of lecturing is all about the way they say it as well.

Is a "name" any better at lecturing than a person who really knows their stuff and is passionate about it as well, as Christine and Barry were? I'd be fascinated to find out.

The economic news throughout this year might have been dire but not enough to trouble the folk booking with Gill's Cruise Centre.

The cruise specialist says this year, 80% more customers than in 2008 have chosen to book balcony cabins. Or put another way, balconies have accounted for 36% of the company's bookings this year.

A kind of two fingers to the recession I guess, or is it just that the prices are so good they would be daft to miss out.

How about an 11-night Eastern Mediterranean on MSC Splendida from Genoa from £699 per person including flights and a balcony cabin on January 31? Or a 14-night transatlantic crossing from Barbados to Southampton on P&O's Oceana on March 19 2010, from £1,299 per person including a balcony cabin and one-way flight to Barbados?

Both deals, and more, are bookable by going to Gill's website or calling 08456 582323.

Rooms with balconies have become the cabin of choice for more and more people these days - it's why new cruise ships have so many and invariably the cruise lines report that the ships fill from the top down.

They are also addictive. It's a strange person indeed who chooses to go back from a balcony to an inside or seaview room that never enjoys a bit of fresh air.

Just think. No private place to sit outside and get away from the maddening crowds and nowhere to enjoy a glass of bubbly as the sun goes down and you bid farewell to yet another port. It's a hard life!

I was interested to read on Travelmole that Cruise West has started to offer kids' prices.

It's a welcome new development for any parent who longs for an adventurous cruise away from the Mediterranean or Caribbean hordes but is put off by prices. But what really grabbed my attention was seeing the cruise line says children are children until age 18.

Hooray.

With the notable exception of MSC Cruises and Costa Cruises, which offer free cruises for under 18s, cruise lines generally suffer from the theme park syndrome that says kids are adults by the age of 12 or 13, which is patently unfair for many reasons.

First, as far as I'm aware anyone under 16 in this country has to go to school so how can they be out earning money to go on a cruise? They can't. It's just more for mum and dad to have to pay. Not a great way to win new customers.

Second, as youngsters get on board the family-friendly ships they are bombarded with leaflets urging them to join the kids or teens clubs. Hang on? I thought they were adults.

And lastly, as if to pour salt into the wound, they pay an adult price but you just watch what happens when kids try to get into the adult-only pool or relaxation area. I'm not saying they should be allowed in - I'm sure all adults welcome a child-free bolt-hold - but if they can't get in, they should not be classed, and charged, as adults.

Under Cruise West's new pricing, under 18s will pay half the adult fare. Babes under two will cruise for free.

While on the subject of age, I spotted this on Carnival Cruise Lines' website the other day.

"Guests under the age of 21 must be accompanied in the same stateroom by a parent or guardian 25 or older."

Imagine the scene. Mum looks up to 20-year-old (he didn't stop growing and now towers over her) and says excitedly "We're going on a cruise."

Then adds apologetically: "There are just two things. As it's an American ship, you won't be able to drink alcohol. And two. I know you have your own house here in the UK but in the US you're a child so you've got to share a cabin with your father and me."

I'm not sure who to feel sorry for most.

How ironic that the Centres for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) should report that the incidents of norovirus on ships reached its lowest level for almost 10 years in 2009 just as Fred Olsen was battling with its latest outbreak.

It says there were just 13 outbreaks on ships operating from US ports, down from 34 in 2006, even though more people were cruising.

Somehow I don't think Fred Olsen will take heart from the report. Balmoral and Boudicca were both hit with the vomiting bug during their Christmas and New Year cruises. Cruise Critic says it's the third time in less than a month that passengers have been taken ill on Boudicca.

In a statement, Fred's managing director Mike Rodwell said: "This is just the time of the year when the norovirus, or winter vomiting virus, becomes widespread in the UK, and being highly contagious it can spread very quickly in the confines of a cruise ship."

True. But what about the outbreak on Balmoral in September?  Or the outbreak on Marco Polo in last July? He can't blame winter for either of those.

Rather than make meaningless statements, Fred really does need to do something and fast to get the bug in check.

May I suggest a few lessons from the readers of Cruise.co.uk, writing in response to news of the Boudicca Christmas outbreak.

This from Shelledpea:

"This report says a lot about the customers that FO attracts especially as has been pointed out so few staff are coming down with the virus as opposed to the pax! Maybe a quick guide to hand washing i.e hot water, soap, as hot as you can stand for 1 min minimum like in the food trades! Not the quick flick under a cold tap and then longer under the hand dryer that some people do."

This from PropShaft:

"I do feel that the cruise lines should now send everybody an information sheet with the cruise tickets on virus information and basic passenger hygiene, and what is required of passengers during the cruise. Sterile wipes for wiping door handles etc are a good idea, but when we see someone leaving the toilet without washing hands we should call them back and remind them, that they have forgotten. It's our own safety they put at risk."

Cruise.co.uk readers are in no doubt that the bug pops up time and again on Fred ships because its passengers are all rather elderly.

It's true, they are. But if that has a bearing, either because older people are more prone to illness or because they are less concerned about hygiene, why don't Saga, Swan Hellenic, Voyages of Discovery or Spirit of Adventure get regular outbreaks as well?

Any suggestions gratefully received.

Everyone always goes on about service on cruise ships but have you ever wondered why it is (usually) so good?

The cynics, of course, would say it's the thought of all those tax-free tips and the hope, in these days of auto gratuities, that they might just pick up a little extra cash in hand if they smile and are helpful.

But it could also have much to do with the training - especially when it comes to Crystal Cruises.

I have discovered their crew have to undergo a minimum six-months' training at the cruise line's own college in the Philippines before they are even allowed on to one of the cruise line's two ships, Crystal Serenity and Crystal Symphony.

Over that time, they are taught the Six-Star Crystal Basics, which focuses on attitude, communication, competence, style, safety/environment and execution.

Basically, it means they are taught to address passengers by name from the time they are introduced and to identify and focus on personal preferences such as how they take their coffee, where they like to sit and in which restaurant, their favourite types of wine, what amenities they use, and so on.

There is all sorts of Japanese words (Crystal is a Japanese company) thrown in to the training philosophy as well, all to do with being on a "never-ending journey" and "belief in continuous improvement".

It all sounds very impressive but the important thing is, does it translate into good service. And the answer is a resounding yes. In fact I might even be inspired to say "excellent" in connection with Crystal.

It must work well for the crew as well as the turnover rate is just 9%, which I'm told (by Crystal, it's true) is the lowest in the industry.

Interestingly, many of Crystal's crew are from Eastern Europe and Turkey, which brings me to an interesting debate that keeps coming up when I'm on a cruise ship. Who offers the better service? The Eastern Europeans or the Filipinos?

The Filipinos are very good, full of smiles and one or two I've known have been excellent but as a generalisation I prefer the Eastern Europeans as I feel able to build a better rapport with them.

They might not have wall-to-wall smiles, but I like the fact you can go off script - maybe talking about places or politics, even the cruise line - and you don't get another wide grin and the standard cruise ship reply, "excellent".

Who do you prefer - Filipinos or Eastern Europeans? I'd be interested to hear your views.

No sooner had I written how mean cruise lines are when it comes to charging for kids than news came winging my way from Crystal that it is offering free cruises for kids in 2010.

OK so they actually only go free on two cruises. but that's two more than last year and more importantly, the offer applies to all those aged 17 and under so they, at least, are playing fair with families.

I'm not convinced Crystal this is an ideal cruise line for young children as they generally want to play with kids their own age, but I took my daughter, aged 15, on Crystal Serenity this summer, cruising from Pireaus to Civitavecchia, and we had a ball.

On port days, we went off and did our own thing, discovering local sights, lunching ashore and fitting in a bit of shopping as well.

On board, she quickly discovered the video library and was happy relaxing with a film while I was working. She was also old enough to appreciate the fine and friendly service and also to enjoy the good food in the main dining room and the speciality restaurants.

After dinner, she usually met up with the handful of other teens on board and they'd hang out at the swimming pool as they weren't allowed in any of the bars without parents after 11pm.

In fact that was her biggest complaint because after all the last thing she wanted was mum hanging around with her friends. And mum wasn't too keen to act as chaperone either.

Crystal definitely needs to do something about that policy if it wants to win the hearts and minds of the under-18s. I couldn't see why they couldn't go in the nightclub - especially as few other passengers did.

Crystal's two kids' free cruises are on Crystal Symphony. One is a round-Britain voyage from Dover on June 14, the other a Baltic cruise from Copenhagen to Stockholm on August 7.

Prices start from £1,942 per person for the round-Britain cruise and £2,048 cruise-only for the Baltic cruise. Contact Crystal on 020 7287 9040 or click here for more information.

Cruise Critic's editor in chief Carolyn Spencer Brown must have been reading Cruise Thomas Cook's latest press release when making her 2010 prediction that cruise lines will carry on discounting into 2010.

Last week the cruise retailer hit the high streets fighting, promising a 2010 campaign where "we won't be beaten on price".

Specifically, it guarantees to match any quotation from another ABTA travel agent within 24 hours of booking or receiving a quote. It is also offering up to £500 more discount per booking and giving away a cruise a week with Royal Caribbean International and Celebrity Cruises via an in-store scratch card promotion.

Here are a few of the deals available until January 31:

* P&O Cruises - save up to £800 per stateroom and get up to £200 on-board credit. Oceana special --- on board credit on every 2010 sailing.

* Princess Cruises - save up to £1,000 per stateroom and get $200 on-board credit on Alaska 2010 sailings and selected Exotic 2010/11 sailings.

* Cunard - save up to £300 per person on all transatlantic crossings and get $10 per person per day to spend on board if you book by February 28.

* Royal Caribbean International - save up to £400 per stateroom and receive up to $200 per cabin on-board credit on selected Oasis of the Seas sailings.

* Costa - receive £400 on-board spend on selected Far East sailings on Costa Allegra and Costa Classica.

Finally one of the big cruise lines has broken away from the pack and acknowledged that single cruisers are nice people to have on board after all.

I say that with all due respect to P&O Cruises, which is building new ship Azura (launching in April) with 18 single cabins. I thought that was a positive step.

But on Wednesday evening, NCL announced that the 128 Studio cabins on its new ship Norwegian Epic, launching in June, will go on sale as single rooms from January 18.

They will cost from £599 per person for a seven-night Caribbean cruise (excluding flights), which NCL claimed did not to contain any of that dreaded single supplement.

Out of interest, I checked my brochure, published way before this announcement, and that quotes Studios from £479 per person with up to 100% supplement for a single person.

I was also told that in response to a question during the annoucement, NCL said the per person price will be slightly lower if two people are shoehorned into one of these tiny Studios - they are 100 square feet, which means you can take your cat but cancel all thoughts of swinging it - which means there is a very small supplement.

But hey, for £599 who really cares? The room might be small, but Studio passengers get access to their own lounge where they can go to watch TV, have a drink and make friends. It's brilliant if you are travelling alone, as you can identify the other lone cruisers.

So will other cruise lines take up the singles challenge? Realistically, no. NCL is not being altruistic by catering for singles; it just happens to have these Studios on Epic, which senior vice-president marketing Maria Miller admitted had sold mainly to single people anyway. "We are positioning them where the market is," she said.

Having said that, it only takes one cruise line to do something for the others to follow. Speciality restaurants, poolside screens, adult-only lounges, whizzy water slides, automatic gratuities. They all started somewhere.

Now we just need one of the big cruise lines to actually have the courage to break away from the pack and do something about tipping, not just say they are "looking" at it.

Or is that just being too unrealistic?

While UK workers were struggling to work in the ice and snow last week, 1,200 passengers aged over 50 were fighting their way to Southampton to join Saga Ruby for their 103-night world cruise.

All had paid between £11,000 and £50,000 for their holiday so naturally no one wanted to miss it. One woman was chauffeured all the way down from Kirkcaldy. Captain Philip Rentell battled his way to the port from the West Country in a 4x4.

Apparently it was all change in procedure when it came to loading the ship in minus 6 degrees. Frozen goods such as ice cream normally have to be rushed on board but they were happy to sit out on the quay, making way for the orchids table decorations, which were in serious danger of freezing to death.

The last passenger finally boarded at 8.30pm and the ship set sail at 9.15pm, delayed from 6pm, heading to warmer climes in the Caribbean, Australia, New Zealand and Asia with not a snowflake in sight.

Jealous? Moi?

When Cruise Critic asked in its daily poll yesterday whether readers looking for extra value preferred free flights, a cabin upgrade, a two-for-one offer or on-board credit, I thought the answer was in the bag.

Well almost. Free flights or half-price cruises. I couldn't decide which. But no. An overwheming majority voted for on-board credit.

A surprise result and something for cruise lines and travel agents to consider when devising their next offers.

Here are the results:

On-board cruise credit: 42.77%

Free upgrades: 25.79%

Two-for-one offers: 21.38%

Free flights: 10.06%

For those who don't know, Royal Caribbean's private Caribbean island of Labadee is on the north coast of Haiti. It apparently escaped any damage in the earthquake that destroyed so many buildings and claimed so many thousands of lives.

As a result, Royal has decided to continue visiting, using the calls as a way to transport water and dry goods to the island. It points out passengers are also pumping much-needed money into the hands of the locals who work there.

The first ship since the earthquake was back there last Friday, three days after the earthquake, and more will be there this week.

Is it right to keep going? It's an impossible question. Of course they should, given they are getting supplies and money to the island. On the other hand, I struggle with the idea of going ashore and having fun knowing about the death and devastation just a few miles away.

Judging by yesterday's story on Cruise Critic I am not alone.

Cruise Critic asked its readers whether ships should have returned to Labadee so soon. Some 3,495 people responded across its .com and .co.uk sites. And the verdict? An overwhelming 67% said yes.

Here are the results:

Yes, Haiti needs the money - 35%

Yes, they're bringing aid - 32%

No, it's in poor taste - 19%

I'm on the fence - 14%

I wonder what the response would have been if they had asked: "Should cruise ships have returned so soon and would you like to be going?"

What was that I was saying about the cruise lines' obsession with safety and security?

Carnival Cruise Lines has told embarking passengers they are no longer allowed to lock the luggage they hand over to porters for delivery to their cabin "to maintain a safe and secure environment".

I think it is safe to say the idea has gone down like a lead balloon with most passengers.

Aside from the fact that many dislike the thought that porters, security guards and whoever happens to be wandering by at the time is free to nose through their luggage, there is a very slightest suspicion that this is nothing to do with safety and security at all but rather is an attempt to stop all those fun-loving passengers smuggling booze into their cabins.

Here's what John Frenaye, writing in Travel Research Online, said:

"As we all know, alcohol sales are one of the top moneymakers on a cruise. And as anyone familiar with Cruise Critic knows, most of the Carnival loyalists routinely share stories on how to best smuggle booze on board."

And they say we Brits are tight because we object to the cruise line's forced tipping policies!

Frenaye also makes the point, as do Cruise Critic readers, that there is a small issue of liability here. Just who would be liable if something were to disappear from your suitcase between you handing it to the porter and it arriving in the cabin?

Not Carnival, because the porters are not their employees."Try to sue the Longshoreman's Union. Fat chance," writes pnjkeith on the Cruise Critic.

Everyone writing in response to Frenaye's comment is also unhappy, including several agents. "I've been selling Carnival for over 23 years and guess what - that will be stopping soon," writes Kenagain.

Can't help feeling this will be a decision Carnival lives to regret.

I was sad but not surprised to see Star Clippers has decided to drop Antigua, for the rest of this winter season at least, after one of its passengers was murdered there last month.

Not surprised because the last thing any cruise line wants is to risk the safety and security of passengers - an irritating phrase most of the time but I'll admit it maybe has some validity in this case.

Sad because my daughter and I had a lovely few days at the Blue Water Hotel on the island last October. We found it a friendly place, but with the usual annoying hassle if you wanted to buy something at a market stall.

The taxi drivers were efficient, chatty and all abided absolutely to the rates per journey system laid out by the government or whoever (such a good idea as it saves having to haggle every time you want to go anywhere).

Murders can and do happen everywhere. The problem is, it's happened too many times lately in Antigua. This was the fourth murder in less than two years.

As I've said before, it's easy for a destination to get a bad reputation, far more difficult to win back it's good name.

Star Clippers is the first to leave, but I suspect other cruise lines will follow - not immediately maybe, and they'll say it's nothing to do with this incident, but slowly, slowly they'll find other islands to visit because they can't afford to take a risk.

For once, I hope I am wrong.

After all its norovirus problems, how nice to see some good news for Fred Olsen. It has the cheapest beer on the high seas.

In a survey of the cost of a 33cl bottle of Becks on 10 cruise lines by Cruise.co.uk, Fred Olsen came bottom of the table at just £2.20.

P&O Cruises and Princess Cruises came in at number nine and eight respectively, at £2,35 and £2.51 (including 15% tip) each. Surprisingly, both were cheaper than Ocean Village.

Topping the lot was Royal Caribbean at £3.95 including 15% tip - a whopping 80% more expensive than Fred Olsen. Even the dreaded Ryanair is cheaper, charging £2.85 a bottle.

Here are the full results:

Cruise line             Cost of Becks beer (33cl)       Total Cost in £ (incl tip)

Royal Caribbean      $5.50 plus 15% tip                  £3.95
 
NCL                       $4.95 plus 17% tip                  £3.61
 
Celebrity Cruises     $5 plus 15% tip                      £3.59
 
Cunard Cruises       $4.75 plus 15% tip                   £3.41
 
Costa Cruises         $4.25 plus 15% tip                   £3.05
 
Holland America      $4.25 plus 15% tip                   £3.05
 
Ocean Village          £2.65                                   £2.65
 
Princess Cruises     $3.50 plus 15% tip                   £2.51
 
P&O Cruises           £2.35                                     £2.35

Fred Olsen             £2.20                                    £2.20

(Exchange rate was as at January 8 2010, with £1 = $1.60)

Mind you, the report also says a 33cl Becks costs about 66p in Tesco. It makes you realise just how much even Fred makes on its drinks.

Cheers!

This is a story I never thought I'd write - at least not while the economy is still teetering on the brink. Or is that really still only here in the UK?

From March 22, Carnival Cruise Lines will be increasing prices for all summer sailings by up to 5%. The move has been prompted by what Carnival president and CEO Gerry Cahill called "unprecedented levels" of bookings between January 1 and February 22, the Wave period.

He says that's all to do with the strong support Carnival has received from agents, targeted marketing and Carnival's strategy of basing ships in a multitude of ports around the US, in easy driving distance of large swathes of the population.

The laws of supply and demand say that he is right to put up prices. Or they would if it was just Carnival in the market. But there are plenty of other cruise lines out there still offering good deals that Carnival customers can turn to if they don't like the price hike.

I imagine those lines will be looking on with interest to see if the Carnival tactic works.

Royal Caribbean International president and chief executive officer Adam Goldstein writes on his blog that they will have 10 of their 22 ships in Europe in 2011.

It's very impressive but I fear we could be in danger of a European overload. Places like Barcelona, Santorini and Naples are often bursting with cruise ships as it is and just can't take anymore - or at least can't take anymore and still deliver a good experience for visitors.

Dare we hope Royal might look for new destinations as they plan their saturation campaign?

Goldstein doesn't say which ships will be over here - all will be revealed over the next couple of months - but I'm guessing it won't be Oasis of the Seas, the world's biggest cruise ship, or its giant sister Allure of the Seas. Yet.

Let's face it. There has to be a limit as to how long they can have two huge ships just going round and round on rather unexciting Eastern and Western Caribbean itineraries. Norwegian Cruise Line clearly thinks so, hence it is bringing Norwegian Epic here in 2011.

So I reckon we could yet see one of them in Europe. Probably not in 2011 but maybe 2012.

These ships are too big to get into any port over here, or so it has been said, but 2012 is still a while away and anyway, my suggestion of seven-night cruises to nowhere, giving passengers loads of time to spend, spend, spend on board (and boost Royal's profits), is still up for grabs.

MSC Cruises is the latest cruise line to come out with an AA-sponsored drinks package. "Sponsored" as in it is clearly trying to drum up trade for Alcoholics Anonymous.

The cheapest alcohol package is £33.30 per person per day. Now I just happen to have a bar list from MSC Magnifica, from when it was in Southampton at the end of last month, and can tell you a large draft beer (40cl) costs €4.70, which at today's exchange rate is £4.40.

You'd have to drink more than seven of those each day to make that package pay.

Let's assume you'll have a bottle of wine with dinner. The list has bottles from £15.00 (excellent value, by the way) so you can down a whole one each (this is a per person package remember) every day and still have plenty of credit left for beers and cocktails.

There is also a premium drinks package at £37.80, which I assume includes spirits, and a couple for non-alcoholic drinks costing £18.90 and £23.40.

I'm all in favour of drinks packages as I dislike the way waiters have to otherwise hover over you for your cruise card and signature - and it's not very nice for them either - but they are all so ridiculously priced. Unless you really are a candidate for AA.

Of course clever people will buy one and use it between two. It means you'll have to get a drink at one bar and then go to another for the second one, but suddenly the package looks excellent value. Just don't say I suggested it!

MSC is giving away a drinks package with bookings for balcony cabins on MSC Fantasia (sailings from March and October) and MSC Spendida (sailings from March to November) made before March 31.

An offer not to be cheered at, I feel.

Was Carnival UK commercial director Nigel Esdale just trying to deflect questions when he told journalists and travel agents at the Carnival UK 2010 report last week that he wouldn't "rule out" basing a P&O Cruises ship in the Med?

It is, after all, a bit of a meaningless throwaway line.

But if it was just a throwaway remark, he might want to think again. Specifically about when Med flycruises might be ruled in, if the comments on Cruise.co.uk are anything to go by.

Harry from Hastings points out the benefits of a Med flycruise on a ship that charges sterling on board now the euro has gone sky high (or is it that the pound has plunged?), Shelledpea acknowledges there is always Thomson for a British Mediterranean flycruise but wants an Ocean Village feel on a "fairly modern ship". VinnyTurner reckons it's only a "matter of time" before a P&O ship is based in the Med.

It would be strange indeed to start Med flycruises having gone to all the trouble of closing Ocean Village but all OV's passengers have to go somewhere for their next cruise. Does it make sense for Carnival UK to let them go to Thomson Cruises or to help fill Royal Caribbean's new cruises from Palma?

And if the Brits want seven-night British cruises in the sun, as opposed to to the sun, surely that's what P&O has to give them.

Just to prove how much OV was loved, by the way, its last cruise, in October this year, went on sale yesterday but there was so much demand the system crashed and they had to take it off sale. The website says it will be going back on sale tomorrow, Wednesday, at 10am.

There must also be a limit as to how many passengers P&O Cruises can continue to embark in Southampton, especially given all the cruise lines it is up against now.

Celebrity Cruises is coming in new in this year with the classy Eclipse and MSC Cruises is moving into Southampton in 2011. Neither offers that true-Brit experience, but whose to say new-to-cruise passengers, which all these lines have to attract to fill their new tonnage, are that bothered?

The question now surely is not if P&O will make the Mediterranean flycruise leap, but when.

Alaska's Governor Sean Parnell seems finally to have noticed the exodus of cruise ships from his state and decided to do something about it.

Namely lower the cost of the $46 per passenger head tax that has caused cruise lines to pull ships from the region and Stein Kruse, Holland America's President and CEO to brand Alaska as having regulations that are "more burdensome and more costly than anywhere else on earth".

Alaska will receive about 140,000 fewer cruise passengers (17%) this year as a result of the exodus, which has meant many locals involved in tourism have lost their jobs.

An agreement between Parnell and cruise ship representatives was hammered out during Seatrade in Miami last week. The state will cut the head tax, introduced in 2006, by 25% in return for the nine cruise lines who have filed a federal lawsuit against the state agreeing to drop their action and send more ships to Alaska.

The reduction brings the tax down to $34.50 per passenger. There is also an existing $4 per person charge to fund an Ocean Ranger programme that monitors pollution in Alaska's waters, This is not in dispute and will remain.

All sorted then? Well no. The agreement now has to get through the Legislature and that is not a given because it is an election year and the Legislature is due to adjourn for the year on April 18, according to the Anchorage Daily News.

So there is a definite need for speed. Let's hope the people in power recognise that and respond accordingly. After all, cruise ships have proved they can go somewhere else and I haven't heard too many passengers moaning so the only ones who are really suffering here are the locals.

Does anyone remember the cruise headlines from October last year?

I do, because the big one was made right in front of me, during the Cruise Forum part of the Travel Convention in Barcelona, when Robin Shaw, Royal Caribbean Cruise Lines' soon-to-be-ex managing director UK and Ireland, said RCCL was looking at the whole issue of tipping because the Brits won't pay up.

Well five months on Robin is about to move to Acromas, where he will be looking after Saga Cruises and Spirit of Adventure (both of which incidentally include tips in the cruise price so that's one problem he won't have anymore!) and no changes have been made at RCCL.

But they have at MSC Cruises, which has just replaced tips with a service charge. The charge is added to each passenger's bill at the end of the cruise (half price for under 17s, free for under 14s) and is mandatory, according to my MSC Club newsletter.

It also allows MSC to proclaim - in the same newsletter - "no tips are requested on board".

Interestingly Costa Cruises moved to a mandatory service charge in 2007. Both argue it is a fairer system as it means the money can be distributed to all crew, rather then disappearing into the pockets of a chosen few.

I've also heard the word "mafia" used more than once to describe what happens under the traditional tipping system and why cruise lines wanted rid of it. And of course the fact is that too many passengers - and not just the Brits, please note - don't pay up if given a choice.

I would be a greater fan of this new system if the charge were actually added to the cost of the cruise. After all, as it is mandatory, you don't get any choice. The cost of the cruise and the service charge added together is what you have to pay.

Having said that, it is a move in the right direction.

All we need now is for other cruise lines to follow the Italian lead, then for them all to realise that explaining the charge to passengers is just too much like hard work so it might as well be included in the cruise price.

Thomson Cruises, Saga, Spirit of Adventure and all the others that do already include tips would lose their edge and Cruise.co.uk followers would have to find something else to moan about (just mention foie gras), but just think how much happier the passengers will be.

And isn't that what cruising and holidays are all about?

I'm sure I can't be the only person rejoicing that Crystal Cruises is to introduce a new flexible dining option for passengers who want the freedom to eat when and with whom they want.

Regular readers of this blog will know I am no fan of the same table, same dining companions system that Crystal currently operates.

When my daughter and I sailed with Crystal last year we ate in the dining room only four times, preferring the freedom of the speciality restaurants. At least there was another option - well two of them actually - and happily Crystal doesn't charge for them either.

But how nice for passengers like us not to feel they have to eat somewhere else.

Crystal's Open Dining by Reservation will be available on both Crystal Serenity and Crystal Symphony from January 2011. Passengers can either make reservations before they cruise - stipulating the number of people and required table size - or on a day-to-day basis. For those who prefer it, fixed two-seating dining will still be available.

Apparently, Open Dining is being introduced in response to feedback from passengers, but there are still some who prefer the old regime (I wonder how long for?). As Crystal's UK sales and marketing director Andy Harmer points out, it's good they are also being catered for.

The change pulls the carpet out from under all those people who have previously argued that Crystal can't be luxury because it tells passengers when they can eat.

And incidentally, the All-inclusive As You Wish promotion, which gives each passenger up to $1,000 to spend on whatever they want on board, also puts the cruise line up there with the other all-inclusive six-star lines because with that much spending money you should never have to pay for a drink.

Play your cards right and you should get a spa treatment or shore excursion for free - or both - as well.

Harmer also revealed "As You Wish" will be available for all cruises in 2011 and next year also Crystal is returning to Alaska after six years, offering nine 12-night cruises from San Francisco on Crystal Symphony.

That's all he's saying for now. As soon as I hear more, I'll let you know.

My blog about MSC Cruises' new service charge did not go unnoticed at TUI Towers.

David Selby, managing director of Thomson Cruises, was quickly on the phone with a light-hearted quip but also to make a few very serious points about the whole issue of tipping and service charges.

"When the news came out, a colleague of mine wryly suggested MSC might soon be mistakenly taken to stand for Mandatory Service Charges. Whilst I have to admit it raised a smile, it's not the sort of reputation I want our industry to get.

"After all, we all operate in the luxury holiday market - and yet sometimes the pricing and advertising tactics are more akin to market traders. It drives me mad.

"I hope it's only a matter of time before other cruise lines follow our lead and start advertising the price a customer is expected to pay - not trying to lure them in with an artificially low one and then hitting them hard with hidden extras."

Interestingly, but probably not surprisingly, there has been no comment at all from any of the other cruise lines. I'd be pleased to hear from anyone who wishes to respond.

A couple of weeks ago, Alaska governor Sean Parnell thrashed out an agreement with the cruise lines on the controversial head tax that has caused many to pull ships out of the 49th state this year.

Now Travel Weekly US reports that Parnell has submitted a bill that will more than double the reduction originally agreed.

Are they keen to have the cruise lines back or what? Not surprising really given this summer the number of cruise calls will fall 17%, which translates into 140,000 fewer cruise passengers.

It also translates into a lot of unemployment among locals involved in the tourism business.

The original agreement was for a 25% reduction. The bill proposes a 59% cut, bringing the head tax down from $46 to $19.50, but only on cruise itineraries that include both Juneau and Ketchikan.

It's all to do with a provision to offset the municipal cruise head taxes levied by Juneau and Ketchikan, respectively $8 and $7.

In a press release, Governor Parnell said: "Declining visitor numbers and dollars have been felt throughout the state. We must do more to make Alaska a more affordable destination for travelers and create jobs for Alaskans."

I promised to bring you more news about what Crystal Cruises is doing in 2011 as soon as I found out, rather expecting to be reeling off details of ports and itineraries for next year.

Instead, there is the much-more-exciting news that in 2011, Crystal is offering free flights with all sailings.

It's great news for lovers of luxury, but possibly not so wonderful for Crystal. As I already reported, they are also continuing their All-Inclusive As You Wish offer, giving couples up to $2,000 to spend on whatever they want - alcohol, spa treatments, excursions, and so on.

What with that, and the free flights, it must be quite painful for the money men.

It's great for consumers though, and has sparked an all-inclusive battle as at the end of last month Regent Seven Seas Cruises launched its 2011 programme, also offering free flights.

On Regent, all drinks - soft and alcoholic - are already included in the cruise price, as are shore excursions.

So which is the most inclusive?

The answer is, it depends. If you go on lots of shore excursions, you'd be better off with Regent, although of course you can use your $1,000 Crystal credit ($2,000 per couple remember) towards whichever shorex you fancy.

However, if you like to be pampered in the spa, Crystal would be better as you can also use the on-board credit in there, whereas on Regent you pay full whack.

As already reported, for 2011 Crystal is bringing in Perfect Choice Dining, allowing passengers to escape the rigid two-sitting fixed dining system if they wish, and the line has also confirmed it is going back to Alaska for the first time since 2005.

It is offering nine 12-night sailings on the 940-passenger Crystal Symphony from San Francisco between May 9 and August 13.

In spring, Symphony will be around South America, the Panama Canal, Mexican Riviera and Hawaii. In autumn, it relocates to east coast US for New England and Canada cruises; in winter it moves to the Caribbean, and back to the Mexican Riviera and Hawaii.

The 1,080-passenger Crystal Serenity, meanwhile, will be in Europe for most of 2011, cruising the Med and Baltic, before relocating to the Caribbean in December.

Here we go again.

Royal Caribbean International has just added yet another new inaugural cruise for its next big ship, the 5,400-passenger Allure of the Seas.

It's a four-nighter going from Port Everglades in Florida to Labadee, Royal's private island in Haiti, on December 1. Just like they offered when Oasis of the Seas launched last. Even the dates are the same.

Anyone booked on the previous maiden cruise - a seven-night Western Caribbean voyage departing December 5 (which only replaced the original December 12 inaugural last month) - has until April 30 to decide if they want to add the four-nighter to their original booking, making an 11-night holiday.

If they do, the price will be adjusted as necessary and Royal will throw in $100 onboard credit per stateroom.

For those keen to try out Royal's next behemoth, the minicruise went on sale today. Prices start from £521 per person.

Cruise lines always blamed the head tax as the reason they took their ships out of Alaska, but could it be that was just an excuse?

Talks between the cruise lines and Alaska's Governor Sean Parnell at the Seatrade Shipping Convention in Miami in March resulted in the State Legislature reducing the head tax in almost unseemly haste.

From October 31, it falls from $46 per person to $34.50, except on cruises visiting Juneau and Ketchikan, when the tax falls to $19.50 because other charges are being waived at these ports.

But what has been the result? Lukewarm at best, if a report in Travel Weekly US is anything to go by.

Seems cruise lines never offered any guarantee to Parnell that they would return to Alaska if the head tax was reduced - and there has hardly been a rush among those who pulled ships to go back.

Could it be that Alaska's star was falling anyway - destinations do come in and out of favour - and rather than say that, as it could affect bookings for their ships still in Alaska, cruise lines blamed the head tax.

Carnival Corporation chairman Micky Arison said there has been no rush back because 2011 itineraries are in place and it would be impossible to make any changes.

Not desirable maybe, but certainly not impossible. Royal Caribbean has just changed Mariner of the Seas' itinerary, and is bringing the ship to the Med next year, giving it 11 vessels in Europe in summer 2011.

Changes can be made if cruise lines want to make them. But Alaska is no longer hot stuff, whereas Europe is.

Interestingly, as the big lines have cut capacity, the smaller ones have deemed it a good time to go to Alaska.

Crystal Cruises is returning for the first time since 2005 next year, and both Disney Cruise Lines and Oceania Cruises will be making their debut in the 49th state in 2011. P&O Cruises will be cruising there from Southampton for the first time in more than 40 years - a 72-night voyage on adult-only ship Arcadia.

Has Fred Olsen Cruise Lines got a death wish? I know the price of oil is high, but surely now, when the economy and confidence are still shaky, and Fred continue's to battle with norovirus, is not the time to slap a fuel surcharge on your cruises.

Have you noticed that no one else has followed suit?

I stand well and truly corrected. Seems I was wrong and both P&O Cruises and Cunard have followed Fred Olsen's lead and are slapping a fuel surcharge on all cruises departing after November 1.

My thanks to Martin Hay from GoCruise, who was first to correct me, and Captain Greybeard, alias John Honeywell, who was not far behind.

John has been doing battle with the North Sea on Saga Pearl II, which I will be joining on Friday, to have my first taste of life as a Saganaut. Just hope the weather is a little kinder.

It was lovely to get a call this week from a friend I met three years ago on P&O Cruises' Aurora, when I was on a two-week sector of its world cruise. He was doing the whole 80-day voyage - does it every year (he was just back from this year's circumnavigation when he called), as well as several other cruises, all with P&O, usually on Aurora.

I've always reckoned that if you cut him in half, it would say P&O through his middle, just like a stick of rock.

But for how much longer?

Temptation in the form of Celebrity Eclipse raised its attractive head and wooed him off to Ireland on the ship's four-night jaunt to Ireland just after the naming ceremony in Southampton.

Here are a few of his comment:

"Nothing was too much trouble for the staff ... the smiles seemed genuine ... the shows were Las Vegas ... the cabin had a proper shower ... this was my first trip and they upgraded me and invited me to the Captain's Club for a drink"

The only negative was that the ship only has "cocktail bars", not the kind of drinking hole he prefers, where passengers prop up the bar all evening - in fact just the kind of place where I met him on Aurora and we convened every evening thereafter!

He said he's been a loyal P&O passenger for 12 years and they have not once so much as offered him a free drink that he was not entitled to as a member of their loyalty club, never mind an upgrade.

So will you now just cruise with Celebrity I asked. He said he is definitely booking with them again but as I suspected, P&O is in his DNA now.

He's got another three cruises booked with them between now and January 2012, including the 2011 world cruise on Aurora of course.

Viking River Cruises is spending $250 million over the next two years on eight new river cruise vessels and two major refurbishments.

The first two new vessels are due to launch next year - Viking Prestige will be offering eight-night cruises on the Danube, sailing from Budapest to Nuremberg, while Viking Emerald will be replacing Viking Century Sun on the Yangtze in China.

The Emerald sounds really spectacular - the biggest suites in river cruising, with separate sitting and sleeping areas, two flat-screen TVs and a wraparound balcony.

More new builds will follow in 2012 and 2013, giving Viking a total 26 vessels.

Viking Pakhomov, sailing in Russia between St Petersburg and Moscow, is one of two due for a comprehensive facelift next year. It will be stripped back to its hull and rebuilt to offer bigger cabins with proper beds.

In Europe, Viking Schumann, sailing the Elbe, is also getting a makeover, with upgraded public rooms and eight new deluxe cabins to be added.

Why is Viking spending all this money? Chairman Torstein Hagen believes river cruising is still in its infancy and has a lot of growth potential.

Hagen can't have failed to spot also that newcomers such as Scenic Tours and APT are muscling into the rivers market with whizzy new river cruise vessels and trying to wrest the Viking crown.

This million-dollar salvo suggests that is not going to be so easy.

Travel Agent Central reports that US citizens are once again able to get visas for Libya thanks to a trade and investment agreement between Libya and the US.

The change also means US cruise ships can get blanket visas for their passengers. I guess that means passengers will be able to go ashore on a ship's excursion but will need a visa if they want to explore alone (as happens if you visit Russia).

So does this mean US cruise ships will be redesigning their Mediterranean itineraries to include calls at Libya?

Probably not - or at least not in too much of a hurry given cruise lines have been bitten once before; told they could call but then been unable to disembark US citizens.

Travel Weekly US quotes Oceania Cruises' Tim Rubacky as saying simply: "We are watching the situation develop with interest."

For the sake of the Americans, I do hope that Libya does open up for them. I was there last year on a cruise with Swan Hellenic and it is an incredible destination. The ancient Roman remains were amazing, as expected, and I loved the fact they were not cordoned off from visitors because, well there just aren't that many visitors to worry about.

Of course that will all change if the new visa rules stick and many more cruise ships - and passengers - start heading Libya's way.

On second thoughts then maybe it would be better if Libya changed its mind again on letting the Americans in. Or maybe put a maximum on the number of cruise ships allowed per year.

Elitist I know, but some things are worth preserving.

The baffling thing about the new afternoon tea that Fred Olsen has introduced on all its ships is not that they are charging for it - show me a cruise line that isn't looking for new ways to increase on-board revenue - but that they describe it as a "proper" afternoon tea.

What, I wonder, have they been serving all this time in the dining room when the clock strikes three (or is it four?).

And indeed continue to serve for those who don't want to pay for the new enhanced tea? Next time I'm on I'll be examining those improper sandwiches very carefully.

The "proper" tea costs £5.95 a head and is served by waiters wearing white gloves. There's all sorts of teas including herbal varieties, sandwiches, scones with cream and jam and cakes.

But the best bit is you get to have all this in more secluded surrounds - away from the bustle of the main dining room as it's only for about 40 other passengers a time - with music playing in the background.

Far more elegant you have to admit.

But will Fred followers play the game and pay the extra? I'm told it's booked up fast each time it's been listed in the daily programme. Presumably by people other than JA (pure coincidence I promise!). I somehow get the impression he/she is not impressed.

OK that's a bit of an exaggeration. I was only a butler for about 15 minutes when I visited Azamara Journey in Greenwich today. No matter. It was still a bit of an eye-opener.

I discovered there is such a thing as synchronised service, where butlers walk in step one after another, take their places around a table (they have to time their walk so all arrive in place at the same time) and take their instruction - a slight eye movement -  from the lead butler on when to serve the plates.

They hold in position, hand on plate, until another almost imperceptible eye movement tells them to stand up and back away from the table and another gives them the nod to leave the room.

And I had to do all that. Phew. Here I am "serving" Jo Rzymowska, Royal Caribbean's associate vice-president and general manager UK and Ireland.

The aim was to show us the rigorous English-trained butler service now offered on Azamara since its rebirth as the more inclusive Azamara Club Cruises.

Big changes happened in April - new itineraries that linger longer in destinations, gratuities and wine with dinner included in the cruise price and an English-trained butler to service each suite (previously they had a butler for every cabin but they were not "proper" butlers, it was whispered to me today!).

To be honest much of the training comes down to common sense, an individual's people skills and learning eye for detail - they have to spot when a cushion is the wrong way up or a water bottle label is facing the wrong way, for instance.

The key for me is that they also have to learn how to "read" passengers in double-quick time so they can provide a service that suits each individual.

For instance, the butlers can be your wardrobe manager and tidy your clothes away, which no doubt some people would love but I would dislike. Their skill is in finding that out before I have to tell them. Assuming I can pluck up the courage to admit I prefer to be untidy!

I was dead chuffed after the role play when Rob Preston, marketing and service coach for Triple S Consultancy, which was pulled in to train Azamara's butlers, said my synchronised service skills were excellent. Was this another career waiting in the wings?

And then I overheard him say it to everyone who had a go.

Oh well. Back to the keyboard.

I knew the Cruise Show was busy because I was there on both days and at times you could hardly move because the exhibition centre was so packed.

Now the figures are in from the organisers, Escape Events, and they show a record 16,378 people visited the show at London's Olympia on March 27 and 28 this year.

Of those, 61% were female and 73% were aged over 45 - absolutely cruising's target market. Some 67% said a cruise was their main holiday and 82% said they were likely to book a cruise from one of the exhibitors as a result of visiting the show.

Most of the exhibitors pronounced the event a success. Here's what a few said:

"Mega successful show ... excellent-quality clients, non-stop bookings on the day" - Viking River Cruises.

"Great show with good exposure and high levels of consumers booking" - Yachts of Seabourn.

"Excellent show with ideal potential guests and a great return for us" - Regent Seven Seas Cruises.

More importantly, though, what did the visitors have to say? After all, it was all there for them. You can see their comments on the video below.

Before you look though, make a note of two dates in your diary.

The Cruise Show will be at Birmingham's NEC on October 16 and 17 this year and back at London's Olympia on April 2 and 3 2011.

Look out for changes in MSC Cruises' 2011 brochure, due out by the end of this month.

Over lunch last week, MSC's managing director Giulio Libutti told me the Prima Price has gone - it sat alongside the brochure price and surprise, surprise was the only one anyone ever wanted to pay - to be replaced with a box showing the maximum available discount.

The change means MSC can apply the full discount on cruises that are not selling and reduce the amount of money off if the voyage in question is filling up fast.

Classic yield management in other words.

What is more interesting is that MSC is going to have targeted offers for certain groups of passengers at selected times of year - the over 65s, military veterans or anyone still serving in the armed forces and 19 to 29-year-olds travelling with a friend or partner.

There will also be special fares for honeymooners, while couples celebrating their wedding anniversary will receive £8 per person discount for every year of marriage.

The single supplement comes down to 50% and there's a new Family Plan, offering two connecting cabins - one for mum and dad, one for the kids - for the price of three adults.

I reckon that just about covers off everyone one way or another.

A few days ago, MSC announced the mandatory service charge introduced in the UK in February has been removed so now they add a gratuity but you can change it to what you feel appropriate, much the same as the system operated by most other lines.

Definitely a better system for the Brits.

Thomson Cruises was having major plumbing problems with new ship, Thomson Dream, when I went on board at the end of April, as a vocal minority of the passengers made clear to me at the time.

Then, managing director David Selby said he was confident the problems had been sorted, but judging from recent comments on the Cruise Critic website, that was either a little too optimistic or Dream is having another nightmare.

Now Thomson Cruises says it is confident - again - that the plumbing problems have "largely been resolved".

In a statement, it said:

"The technical fault causing an occasional unpleasant smell found in some parts of the ship has been corrected, and the smell has disappeared.

"Regarding the plumbing issues, there are a small number of cabins that are still affected but these will not be occupied by customers until the problems are completely fixed.

"While plumbing maintenance and repair work is still continuing on the ship, we are confident that the remaining issues experienced will soon be rectified.

"Recent reports from our team onboard confirm that the mood on board is positive and the majority of passengers appear to be enjoying their cruise."

Has anyone been on Dream recently? Why not tell us your experience?

It's taken a while, but finally another cruise line has followed Royal Caribbean International's excellent example on Oasis of the Seas and done away with the need for passengers to fetch their lifejacket from their cabin for the muster drill.

Norwegian Cruise Line is introducing a new procedure whereby on hearing the emergency alarm, passengers go straight to the muster station, where they'll hear all the usual safety info and also presumably learn how to put on a life jacket.

A great move but I had to laugh at NCL's reason for the change. Because of the danger of dangling straps.

They are kidding right?

Nothing to do with the danger of having swarms of passengers running around like headless chickens trying to find their cabin then? It's bad enough when they know it's a drill; imagine if it was a real emergency?

NCL's new muster drill will be rolled out to all ships bar Pride of America. Why not PoA? If anyone from NCL is looking in, do let me know.

Crystal Cruises has made a bit of a name for itself by offering some of the most extreme shore excursions of any cruise line (experiencing the G-Force of blast off at the cosmonauts training centre outside Moscow and free climbing in Croatia, which both sound downright scary to me, spring to mind).

Now it is going in another direction with shore excursions, offering voluntourism days out where passengers can sign up for voluntary work in some of the countries its two ships visit.

It's all part of a "You care, we care" programme launching for 2011 that will include one free shorex where passengers can donate their time to take part in a local charitable project.

Ideas mentioned when I was on Crystal Symphony last week included helping kids in a burns unit in Peru, taking part in a community clean-up in Puerto Vallarta in Mexico and working at the Desmond Tutu Peace Centre in Cape Town, South Africa.

The "We care" bit is where Crystal comes in. It will be donating a portion of the revenue it receives from shore excursions to World Heritage Sites - the pyramids at Giza in Egypt, the Western Wall in Israel, the Great Wall of China for instance - back to the site to help with preservation work.

"We want to make sure we have something to leave for future generations," explained John Stoll, vice-president of land and port operations.

Not sure what anyone can actually do to help communities in just a few hours, but it's the thought that counts, not to mention the money Crystal is giving.

No doubt others will follow the lead, so top marks for Crystal for getting there first.

I've been writing for years that cruising is a great holiday for single people - or would be if the cruise lines didn't charge such swingeing single supplements.

In fact I've been saying it nearly as long as the cruise lines. Trouble is, they do ony say it. They don't do anything to make cruising more financially friendly for soloists.

Until now that is.

P&O Cruises got the ball rolling by building 18 single cabins onto new ship Azura, but they have been well and truly trumped by Norwegian Cruise Line's new Norwegian Epic, which has 128 Studio cabins reserved just for single people.

They are very small - I had  look-see when I was on last week and could almost reach from one wall to the other - and all inside but fine for one person, especially as there is no single supplement.

There is mood lighting ("romantic moments" and "time to go home") and en-suite facilities and the Living Room, a two-storey area with TVs and a bar that is reserved just for singles so they can meet other lone travellers. It'll make the 100 square feet Studio bareable.

And now ultra-luxury drinks-inclusive cruise line Silversea is getting in on the lone travellers' act by reducing the single supplement to 10% of the per person double-occupancy fare on four cruises this year and to 25% on nine cruises.

The cruises are all over the place - in the Med, Caribbean, Far East, South America, Indian Ocean and Middle East - and in both oceanview and balcony cabins, so it's not like they are just trying to sell off the stuff no one else wants.

Now all we need is for the others to recognise that soloists are worth pursuing after all and cruising really will become a great holiday option for single people.

Much has been made of Thomson Cruises being likened most to Primark in the Cruise.co.uk survey that asked its readers to name the one high street retailer they thought most resembled a number of different cruise line brands.

Actually I think they should be very pleased with the result. If you have never cruised before, choosing the right cruise ship is vital. Imagine if you went on Thomson expecting M&S or John Lewis? You'd be sorely disappointed and never cruise again.

Thomson Cruises is a cruise line for Thomson types who want a good, reliable holiday from a brand they trust that doesn't cost the earth. Clearly that message is getting across.

And let's face it, Primark is very successful so being associated with them can't be all bad.

Not sure about some of the other results though. How is Thomson Cruises like Fred Olsen - other than the fact its ships are elderly?

And how did Norwegian Cruise Line end up like Tesco and Ford? A dull supermarket and an ultra-boring make of car. NCL is surely about excitement and fun and pushing the boundaries, not the shopping trolley. It's surely a Punky Fish and a Porsche.

Royal Caribbean and Princess Cruises didn't fare much better. Likened to Debenhams. Another staid, boring high street name whereas their ships are young, fun, glitzy, stylish.

I suppose at least they should be grateful it was not Boots or Asda.

Talking of Antarctica, Holland America Line has said it will continue going there despite the ban on heavy fuels that comes into force next year.

President and chief executive officer Stein Kruse, who was on Nieuw Amsterdam's maiden voyage with me this week, said they will empty the tanks of heavy fuel, clean them and put in lighter fuel, even though the whole operation will be very expensive.

Is it worth it? Passengers on HAL ships can't go ashore so all they can do is look at the continent from the top deck along with 1,500 or so other passengers.

If I was spending all that money to go to Antarctica - and braving Drake Passage into the bargain - I'd at least want to go ashore and get some penguin guano on my wellies!

Is river cruising finally coming of age? The Passenger Shipping Association clearly things so.

Ten of its members are now river cruise operators, which director Bill Gibbons told the PSA's AGM last week is enough to start a movement. So we can expect to see more noise on the rivers front for the rest of the year and into 2011.

One of the things that baffles me is that river cruise operators tell me their UK sales are rampant - the latest release from Avalon said they sold 50% of 2011's capacity on new river cruise vessel Avalon Panorama within two weeks of it going on sale.

Yet has there been a stop-press news release saying the number of Brits taking a river cruise last year soared beyond all expectations? Nope.

Have any stats at all have come my way about river cruising last year? Nope.

Have there been any predictions about what a stonking year 2010 will be and that 2011 will be even better? You guess.

What can we infer from this? Well very little really, except maybe that Bill's movement can't start a minute too soon.

I'm torn about Cuba. It's such a fascinating country as a result of all its history and part of me thinks it would be wonderful if the big US cruise ships could go there (which of course they can't at the moment due to the travel ban), taking much-needed dollars to the Cubans.

On the other hand, I can't bear to think of the place becoming yet another Caribbean island clone, with overpriced jewellery shops, tacky t-shirt emporiums and liquor stores right by the port so Americans can buy their souvenirs without having to see too many locals.

It's with these latter thoughts in mind that I was relieved to read an article in the Palm Beach Daily News, in which Richard Sasso, MSC Cruises' US president, says that even if the travel ban is lifted, American cruise lines won't go there because the island hasn't the infrastructure to handle a huge influx of vessels and tourists.

"It'll probably take one, two or maybe three years before the necessary developments are completed. Lots of work has to be done."

He's right of course. Just think of all those anonymous air-conditioned shops that have to be built.

Most New England and Canada cruises are in the autumn so you can go and see the fall foliage.

I'm sure the red leaves are stunning, but I reckon August is a far better time to be there.

For one thing we had superb weather every day on our Princess Cruises' voyage - in the 70s and 80s Fahrenheit - and flat calm seas. In autumn, I was told, it can get rough as they catch the tail end of the hurricanes.

For another, we had the ports to ourselves. We could hardly move in Bar Harbor because of the 3,400 or so fellow passengers who had come off the Caribbean Princess and were swarming around trying to find their coaches, while the coaches themselves were trying to manoeuvre along the narrow streets.

And that was just one ship. I dread to think what it would be like with two or even three ships in, as apparently happens on some days in September and October. In St John and Halifax, I was told they had days last autumn when there were six ships in town.

A nightmare, according to the guides. And they are the ones who should be happy to see the crowds as they make money from them.

So my advice? Go in July or August to get the weather and avoid the crowds. Princess Cruises is starting its New England and Canada cruises very early next year, on May 17.

My other advice? Pack a hefty dose of patience. You have to tender ashore in Newport and Bar Harbor and Princess really struggled to cope in both places. We got to the harbour at Newport with an hour to spare, looked at the queue, and decided to sit on the grass by the pier, enjoy the sun and wait until we could see the end.

Two-and-a-half hours, lots of sun and five coach-loads of passengers later (all of them arriving after the last tender was supposed to have left) we finally got on the last tender going back to the ship. It was 5pm and the ship should have left at 3.30pm. We had waited for an unbelievable two and a half hours.

I've never seen a crew make a ship ready to depart so fast!

Heaven forbid that cruising should ever become as elitist as it once was. You must know the old saying that cruising used to be for the "well bred and nearly dead".

But things are surely going too far the other way when passengers have to be kicked off a cruise ship for fighting, as happened recently Carnival Cruise Lines.

Reports say a brawl broke out in one of the dance clubs on Carnival Dream and led to 10 people being escorted off the ship in Costa Maya, Mexico, with an 11th person deciding to disembark.

It's not the first time something like this has happened. Two passengers on P&O Cruises' Ventura were "put ashore" during the ship's Christmas/New Year Caribbean cruise in 2008/09.

Then the fighting and bad behaviour was blamed on chavs who had bought a cheap cruise and didn't know how to behave on a ship. Well anywhere, surely, if the reports of what they did were true.

That sounds frighteningly like the "us and them" syndrome but I fear a bit of human nature is also to blame here. Mix alcohol, high holiday spirits and Caribbean heat and things can get out of control - usually for the most ridiculous of reasons I'm sure.

Not that I can see it happening on Seabourn Odyssey, which I was on last week and where there's plenty of alcohol sloshing around as it's all free.

Happily I know from my own experience such incidents don't happen too often - or maybe it's that I am tucked up in bed by the time they do! - and the cruise lines don't mess about when it comes to dealing with any problems.

What does anyone think? Is brawling on cruise ships a growing problem?

Fellow blogger Gene Sloan reports that Americans can now get a week in a balcony cabin on Royal Caribbean International's Oasis of the Seas, the world's biggest cruise ship, for under $1,000 (£666 at current exchange rates).

It's not really surprising prices are falling given Royal Caribbean has to fill the 5,400-passenger ship week after week, even now the launch hype has ended. And very soon they will also have to fill sister ship Allure of the Seas, launching in December.

There are some great cruise-only prices here for Oasis - Royal Caribbean's website has balcony cabins from just over £1,000 per person this year, Cruise.co.uk has them from just under £1,000.

But they always say we import all our trends from the US so I reckon you should keep a look out for some even better prices over the next few weeks.

I wasn't going to put up any posts on this cruise but a) I've discovered why Star Flyer was delayed a day, preventing me from getting on board when I should have, and b) there is wi-fi after all and given they have gone to the trouble of putting it on, it seems churlish not to use it.

According to my spies (that's the passengers who were already on the Star Clippers-owned ship when the delay occurred) the ship's flag was changed from Luxembourg to Valletta a little while ago but nothing was changed on the ship.

Small things like changing its call sign, the country of registry on the lifeboats and lifebuoys, and so on.

Seems the Greeks were not happy with this so when, on this cruise - a 14-nighter that has been sold also as two seven-night voyages - the ship was due to move from Greek to Italian waters, they "arrested" it.

For 23 hours, the ship was held outside Elafonisos by customs officials while things were put in order. Passengers were not allowed off the ship and some hasty paint work changed the name on the lifeboats from Luxembourg to Valletta.

Captain Yurii Kuschenko said he didn't know why was the ship's registry changed after 20 years or so flying the Luxembourg flag, but I'm guessing money is in there somewhere.

Or maybe Star Clippers is getting ready to offer weddings at sea, which is possible under the Malta flag. It would be a wonderfully romantic way to say "I do".

Crystal Cruises has a new Go Green excursion in Malta for passengers visiting the island on two itineraries on Crystal Serenity next month.

It's not one of the new voluntourism days out it announced it is introducing in 2011 when I was on Crystal Symphony because they will be free and you have to pay for this one, but it's in the same vein.

It costs $95, lasts eight hours and involves planting trees and learning about conservation efforts at the island's Ta' Qali National Park. That's followed by lunch at an organic farm and a visit to an orphanage, where passengers "will donate time and food to the young residents".

I assume the idea is you buy food from the organic farm rather than bring tins of baked beans and packets of pasta from the UK.

However, think how worthy it would be to go without that fourth or fifth pair of shoes and instead bring some toys for the kids instead.

Surely everyone could manage that?

So how many of you watched Thomson Cruises being savaged by Watchdog on Thursday?

It was a damning indictment of Thomson Dream, but I would make two important points.

One: I am told the film was made in May or June, so surely they should have gone on board before airing the programme to see what passengers are saying now. But maybe that wouldn't have made such a good story (and did they really miss the fact the ship was in that fatal crash at Sharm el Sheikh?).

Two: Since the programme was broadcast, I have read plenty of reviews from past passengers who said they had a great time on the ship. Which just proves you only ever hear from people with negative things to say.

Not that I am here to be an apologist for Thomson Cruises.

My own observation for the Telegraph when I was on in April, just after it entered service for Thomson, was that it was "neither glitzy nor glamorous, nor indeed luxurious as suggested in the brochure".

It's that same old cruising malaise. If it's a cruise ship, it must be luxurious. Actually it's not. The ship is more than 20 years old and sailing for the cruise arm of a mass-market tour operator that specialises in good but budget holidays.

The same cruise line that once told me it's acceptable to charge passengers for using the security boxes at reception on its ships because the type of people who book with Thomson are used to paying for them on its land-based holidays.

It was also quite wrong for the "Thomson agent" in the film to say the ship was five star. She had no idea what she was talking about so gave the answer the caller wanted to hear to make a sale and earn commission. Such behaviour gives all travel agents a bad name.

However, taking Thomson to task for calling Dream their "new" ship was nonsense. It is Thomson's new ship. It just happens to be an old new ship (plenty was written about it being chartered from Costa Cruises before Thomson took delivery for those who could be bothered to look).

Since when have cruise lines proudly announced, "we're buying an old ship"?

In a press release announcing Adonia last December, P&O Cruises said: "The new ship will be named Adonia". This "new" ship launched in 2001 as R8 for Renaissance Cruises, became Minerva II for Swan Hellenic and is now sailing as Royal Princess for Princess Cruises.

In fairness also, managing director David Selby always said they would not be spending any money on the ship until the dry-dock in November. Whether that was a sound decision is another question.

Thomson Cruises' response to the programme was surprisingly low-key.

"Thomson Cruises is naturally sorry to hear that some of our customers did not enjoy their time on board Thomson Dream this summer. The fuller picture is far more positive, however. Throughout the summer the majority of our customers have told us that they enjoyed a fantastic holiday with us.  For example, 94% of customers rated the experience as good or excellent at the time Watchdog's team were onboard.

"The report has brought to light that there may have been some retail staff who may have misinformed customers, and for this we would like to apologise.  

"We accept that there were some challenges following the ship's introduction to our fleet in April of this year. The Captain and his crew did their utmost to resolve any concerns our customers may have had at the time.  Any outstanding concerns have been or are being looked at by our customer services team on a case-by-case basis.

Have you been on Thomson Dream recently? Was Watchdog fair. Let me know what you think.

Southampton is set to become the home of ultra-luxury cruising in 2011 - well for a few days next year anyway.

Yachts of Seabourn proudly proclaims it will be the first ultra-lux line to offer no-fly cruises from the UK port next year.

Seabourn Sojourn, christened in Greenwich last June, will sail into the UK from Rome on April 27, on the last leg of its maiden world cruise, and immediately sets off again on an 18-day Mediterranean Sojourn, to be followed by a 10-day Baltic Sojourn from May 15-25.

Regent Seven Seas Cruises, meanwhile, is testing the no-fly waters for the first time with a 10-night round-Britain cruise from Southampton on Seven Seas Voyager on August 9.

Silversea is doing something a bit different - cruising around the UK from Southampton on Silver Cloud on June 25 and finishing up at Tower Bridge in London 10 days later.

There's then a 15-day cruise back from Tower Bridge to Southampton on July 5. And another cruise from Tower Bridge to Southampton on August 26.

It's all part of this cruising-from-the-UK bandwagon that started rolling a few years back and has resulted in the number of people taking no-fly cruises almost doubling between 2003 and 2009. CruiseBritain says 448,000 cruise passengers visited a UK port last year, while the number of people joining their cruise ship in the UK increased to 733,000.

With more lines cruising from the UK - Holland America is one with a hugely expanded no-fly programme in 2011 - that number surely will increase in leaps and bounds.

Or will it? There is a lot to be said for avoiding the over-the-top security at UK airports but I've noticed the security at cruise ports - and especially Southampton - is going the same way. Belts off, shoes off, laptops out of bags. So that's one advantage on its way out.

More to the point, there's plenty of folk who prefer a flight to the Mediterranean sun instead of two or three days slogging across the Bay of Biscay when it's in one of its moods.

Have you ever cruised from the UK? What was your experience? Why not share your thoughts.

L'Oréal Paris clearly thinks so as it's opening its first shop at sea on Costa Cruises' biggest ship, Costa Pacifica.

The announcement of the new partnership talks of "L'Oréal's determination to enter the world of cruising". Clearly they know a captive audience when they see one.

Not that their commercial director Guido Guida put it quite so bluntly.

"This is a unique opportunity for us to approach our consumers in a dedicated facility where we can convey the values and carry out the mission of L'Oréal Paris."

I imagine they will do very well given the inexplicable and uncontrollable urge people have to go shopping while on a ship.

It's extraordinary. I've seen passengers flock around those ghastly car boot sale tables the stores put out, perfectly positioned to block the corridors, snapping up overpriced t-shirts emblazoned with the names of places where they have either just been or are about to visit (why don't they buy their t-shirts or other souvenirs ashore if they need reminding where they have been?) and jewellery that's so horrible I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

Not that I haven't succumbed to the ship's shops in my time. A few years back, while cruising in Alaska with Princess Cruises, I ventured into one and splashed out on a mac. Nothing to do with computers - it was to keep out the rain.

What a brilliant investment! Then and now, whenever I wear it, the rain stops. Definitely $20 well spent.

I'm just back from a travel convention in Malta, when sadly no one told the weather the island was on show to the UK's travel trade.

Rain, gales, stormy seas. You name it, Malta threw it at us. When I went for a ship visit to Azamara Quest, which called at Valletta on Wednesday morning, I learnt they'd had an unpleasant night rocking and rolling around the Med before they docked, only to find the wind still blowing furiously.

"We wanted to make you feel at home," one of the staff told me as I checked in at the Hilton in Portomaso on Monday, having just got soaked walking a couple of yards from the taxi into the hotel. Funny man.

Apart from the weather, my brief sojourn was memorable for one of the debates at Tuesday's cruise forum called tradition vs innovation service, which revolved around the importance or otherwise of getting tickets in faux-leather wallets.

No one cares, the man from Carnival UK said, revealing they have saved £3 million a year by getting passengers (or their travel agents) to print tickets on-line.

Not true, said the travel agent, who reckoned many of his older customers only book a cruise for the smart ticket wallet they get (that was a joke by the way - or at least I hope it was! - but the point is they want their tickets presented formally in a wallet and not just a piece of paper they have had to print out themselves).

I had to feel sorry for him. He says his printing costs have escalated since cruise lines switched to sending all documents by email, the killer being when his customers want the shore excursion booklet - maybe 64 pages - printed as well.

Personally I am happy to check in on-line but object to the way cruise lines see this as a way to glean as much information about you as they can. Things they really don't need to know and are frankly none of their business.

Not to mention the fact their systems are often not up to the job. I remember trying to fill in the Carnival Cruise Lines' Fun Pass for a visit to Carnival Dream last November. The one thing it was not was fun.

What do you think? Do you want wallets or is online OK? Let us know.

One after another, the cruise lines have put big screens on their ships, added more speciality dining restaurants, vied to have the softest mattresses and best-ever bed linen and towels.

And now the latest craze is to offer exclusive own-label booze.

In fact Disney's new Disney Dream, which I was lucky enough to visit this weekend, will have two own labels.

A just-for-Disney Cuvee Prestige Champagne, Pink, made by France's Taittinger, will be sold in Pink, which, not surprisingly, is the Champagne Bar.

By the way, it's one of my favourite places on the ship - one of four bars and nightclubs in the adult-only District - with pink bubbles going up the wall, each with a silhouette of a pink elephant inside (remember Dumbo?) and a sculpture behind the bar made from 350 pieces of hand-blown Murano glass that resembles the Champagne shower you get when you open a glass of bubbly.

We weren't allowed to take any pictures of the as-yet unfinished interior of the ship - or indeed taste the bubbly, which they expect will cost $75 a bottle - but trust me, that sculpture is fantastic.

Then in the neighbouring 687 bar, named after Disney Dream's yard number, which is for adults only after 9pm, they've got their own US-made beer, also called 687 (obviously a lot of thought went into choosing names for these drinks!).

Just a few weeks ago Carnival Cruise Lines revealed an unhealthy obsession with frogs when it announced not only it was putting a pub on Carnival Magic (it's the first pub on any Carnival ship), to be called RedFrog, but that it would be serving a Carnival-beer exclusive, called ThirstyFrog Red.

Is own-brand alcohol a good idea or another money-making idea? Tell me what you think below.

If I remember the official history correctly, Ocean Village couldn't make flycruising in the Mediterranean pay because of the cost of the flight so Carnival UK packed the two OV ships off Down Under to make more money with P&O Cruises Australia.

So now P&O Cruises, part of Carnival UK, is offering free flights to passengers who book one of the line's debut 2011 Med flycruises on Adonia this month.

Make sense of that.

No doubt P&O's hand has been forced by Royal Caribbean International, which is giving away 10,000 flights on its Mediterranean flycruises.

But in case you think the contagion will spread to all the cruise lines, I have bad news. The folk from Carnival Cruise Lines, who I met on Monday, said they have no plans to give away flights on their Med cruises.

Carnival's new 3,690-passenger Carnival Magic will be sailing from Barcelona next summer, marking the line's return to the Med after a two-year absence.

Adonia's move to P&O in May 2011 is yet another reincarnation for the ship, which started life as R8 for Renaissance Cruises, became Minerva II for Swan Hellenic and is currently Princess Cruises' Royal Princess.

It replaces Artemis, which coincidentally also sailed for Princess Cruises as Royal Princess, even taking the Artemis vessel's P&O mantle of adult-only ship.

In that, Adonia joins Arcadia, which has been adult-only since its launch, and, from November 30 2011, Oriana, which will be designated no-kids from that date.

P&O says it's because Adonia (710 passengers) is smaller than Artemis (1,196 passengers), so they need extra adult-only capacity. Families booked on Oriana after November 2011 can pick an alternative cruises or have their money back.

No, I'm not suggesting Prince William and Kate Middleton tie the knot at sea - although it's possible and certainly would be different.

But three days after they revealed they are to marry next year, I'm still waiting for the first cruise line to announce they will be showing the event live on big screens on their ships.

The world goes mad over a royal wedding, so this is the best excuse ever for people not to book a cruise - especially as the date has not been set. Which is just what cruise lines will want to avoid.

Just as with the football World Cup earlier this year, I'm sure once one announces they will screen it, the rest will follow.

But who will be first? It should be Cunard given its royal connections, but my money is on Royal Caribbean International. After all, its Voyager, Freedom, Oasis ships already have ready-made "streets" for the post-wedding party.

Would you book a cruise over the Royal Wedding date? Let us know your thoughts below.

Starting April 2011, St Peter Line will be operating a twice-weekly ferry between Stockholm and St Petersburg.

The 25-hour journey will be on the Princess Anastasia, until recently known as Pride of Bilbao, sailing between Portsmouth and Bilbao in Spain for P&O Ferries.

P&O closed the route in September 2010, handed the ferry back to owner Irish Continental Group, which sold it to St Peter Line, a Cypriot company.

It's a happy homecoming for the ship, which was built in Turku, Finland, and once sailed as Olympia between Stockholm and Helsinki for Viking Line.

All very interesting, but what really mostly caught my eye is that passengers arriving in St Petersburg on Princess Anastasia will be able to stay in the city for up to 72 hours without getting a Russian visa.

It's the second such visa-free ferry service - in April 2010, St Peter Line started a visa-free ferry service between Helsinki and St Petersburg.

So why can't the same courtesy be extended to cruise passengers, who are mostly only in the city for 48 hours?

At the moment, if you arrive in St Petersburg on a cruise you either have to go ashore on a ship's tour, which means you are covered by their visa, or jump through hoops to get your own. It's do-able but a pain.

Could it be that none of the cruise lines has asked the Russian authorities if their passengers could get special dispensation where visa are concerned?

After all, it's in their interest to sell as many very highly-priced tours as possible - and they do, with many passengers taking morning, afternoon and evening excursions at £100 or more a time - so why rock the boat (excuse the pun)?

When I was there in May this year on Saga's Saga Pearl II, I had a private car for eight hours - driver and guide - which cost an eye-watering £400.

True, I had an unforgettable and very poignant trip to Tsarskoye Selo, out of the city, to see the Alexander Palace, home of the last tsar Nicholas II and the place where he and his family were imprisoned immediately after his abdication in 1917, and I would have struggled to do that alone.

But left to my own devices I could have taken the metro into the city centre for 22 rubles, which is less than US$1.

Clearly the Russians are also making a fortune out of the tours, but they could do like many other countries and protect any lost income by selling visas on arrival.

And actually I don't think there would be much loss because frankly I can't see many cruise passengers going off alone (the Cyrillic alphabet and a weird fear about Russians would put a lot off). But for those who would love to enjoy this fabulous city alone - me! - it would be fantastic.

Prime Minister Putin, please take note.

....but only if you cruise from the UK!

Cruise lines that offer no-fly cruises from the UK could never have bought the kind of advertising they have had in the past eight months.

Flights grounded by the volcanic ash cloud back in May and now by snow just as everyone wanted to get away for Christmas.

I can almost see the likes of P&O Cruises, Cunard and Cruise and Maritime Voyages rubbing their hands with glee and saying (in hag-like tones because after all, it is the pantomime season) "we told you it was better to cruise from the UK".

I know you still have to battle through snow to get to your departure port, and this weekend roads have been particularly bad, and there is a chance of bad weather on the Bay of Biscay.

But the ports of Dover and Portsmouth kindly informed me this morning that the English Channel hasn't frozen so cruises are departing as planned.

And a couple of days rocking and rolling on the way to the Med, Canary Islands or even the Caribbean has surely got to beat night after cold night camped out on the floor at Heathrow Airport.

The Passenger Shipping Association estimates that 710,000 Brits will take a no-fly cruise in 2011, 55,000 more than in 2010. Given the chaos that now reigns, I suspect there could be even more.

It's a little late to think about a Christmas cruise, but if your holiday plans have just been buried under a snow drift why not cheer yourself up with a New Year no-fly cruise instead.

Iglu (020 8544 6447) tells me they have availability on Royal Caribbean International's Independence of the Seas, cruising from Southampton to the Med on January 8 or 26, and on February 13, with prices from £719 per person for 18 nights.

Iglu also has space on Fred Olsen's Boudicca, sailing from Southampton to the Caribbean, up the Amazon to Manaus and back to the UK. It departs on January 30 and prices start from £2,399 per person for 30 nights.

Cruise Thomas Cook (0800 916 6070) has a 14-night cruise from Southampton to the Canary Islands, also on Boudicca, departing on January 16. Prices from £974 per person for an outside cabin.

I had to smile at this.

Eric Goldring, owner of US-based Goldring Travel, fears Silversea is compromising its all-inclusive product by charging passengers on its newest cruise ship Silver Spirit $18 to rent a soft porn movie.

"I am not so concerned about the type of movie, but the fact that Silversea is charging for it.

"When does finding ways to charge (extra cost dining, extra cost saki, extra cost unrequested charity donations, etc) begin to degrade the product of Silversea?"

He says he does not believe charging for movies - blue or otherwise - is appropriate.

Maybe not, but if he blew his principles (ahem!) I'm guessing he would be smiling too.

The Royal Wedding could be caught in the firing line as union bosses try to line up several days of discontent in spring - specifically the working days between the Easter weekend and the ceremony on April 29.

British Airways and London Underground are among companies set to be hit, which could make trying to get anywhere a pain.

Strikes me (no pun intended) a cruise is definitely the place to be that week - and on into the May Day bank holiday on May 2.

Why not? (Royal Caribbean International©)

Cunard, P&O Cruises, Royal Caribbean, Celebrity Cruises and Azamara Cruises have announced they will be showing Prince William and Kate Middleton saying "I do" live on the day as well as promising Champagne celebrations.

I reckon any of their ships will be a far more comfortable place to watch the big event than fighting off the crowds in London. Especially if the crowds are in a bad mood because the trains aren't working properly.

You can check back to past blogs to see where P&O's ships and Royal Caribbean's Independence of the Seas will be.

Cunard's Queen Mary 2 will be somewhere in the Atlantic between New York and Southampton, Queen Victoria will be at sea in the Med, Queen Elizabeth will be en route for Southampton.

A 15-night cruise to Antarctica on Compagnie du Ponant's Le Boreal, pictured, was cancelled at the last minute due to unspecified technical problems.

The 264-passenger ship was on charter to Abercrombie & Kent and would have been sailing full. Instead it will be staying in Ushuaia for repairs to be carried out.

It is understood signs of wear were found by technicians - pretty shoddy considering the ship only launched in May - and the affected parts needed to be replaced.

Ponant said it decided to cancel the cruise to avoid problems arising while in Antarctica.

"If the ship had been sailing in any other part of the world, the parts would have been readily available and the work could easily have been done during its cruise."

A&K is giving passengers on the cancelled Le Boreal cruise a full refund or a credit and 10% discount off a future cruise.

Antarctica is the most remote place on earth, cut off from civilization by the Drake Passage, 1,000km of treacherous sea, so it's not the best place to be if things go wrong.

Last month Clelia II hit a storm on the Drake Passage and its communication equipment was knocked out of action when a wave shattered a bridge window. It's been in Ushuaia for repairs since December 9, missing three sailings, and will finally re-enter service tomorrow.

Most big cruise lines are pulling their Antarctica cruises after this winter due to a new ruling effective August 1 that bans ships using heavy fuel.

The International Maritime Organisation ruling was made on environmental grounds - an accident resulting in heavy fuel spillage was deemed too much of a risk - rather than because of the risk of a bumpy crossing on Drake's.

Princess Cruises, Regent Seven Seas Cruises and Crystal Cruises are all quitting, but Holland America Line has promised to keep going.

Stein Kruse, their president and CEO, told me they will empty the fuel tanks of heavy fuel, clean them out and fill up with lighter fuel for the trip. "It'll be expensive but we will continue to go there."

In 2012, Azamara Club Cruises' Azamara Journey will make its Antarctica debut instead of Celebrity Cruises' Celebrity Infinity.

It means there is less capacity but only of the sightseeing variety - ships with more than 500 passengers are not allowed to make landings; they can only take them to look at the penguins and icebergs.

Which has always struck me as a waste of time and money.

The only way to do Antarctica is on a smaller vessel that can get close to icebergs, fit through the narrow channels and lower Zodiacs so you can go ashore and walk among the penguins.

And there are still plenty of them including Silversea's Prince Albert II, Compagnie du Ponant's Le Boreal, being joined by sister ship L'Austral next winter, Hapag-Lloyd's Hanseatic and Bremen, Lindblad's National Geographic Explorer and Hurtigruten's Fram.

Fred Olsen Cruise Lines has changed its website address, dropping dot.co.uk to become a dot.com.

The cruise line says it's to reflect its international nature - by which I assume it means in terms of where it sails as the Brits are still very much in the majority on a Fred ship - and will make access easier, wherever you are searching from.

Fred Olsen was voted Best cruise line for seeing the world in Cruise Critic's UK industry awards in November.

The url change is one of several techie changes at Fred recently, which is being "dragged kicking and screaming into the 21st century", according to Nigel Lingard, their marketing director.

They've also set up a Facebook fan page, opened a channel on YouTube and started Twittering. You'll find links on the website.

P&O Cruises is to show plays on Adonia when the ship joins their fleet in May, moving across from sister line Princess Cruises, where it sails as Royal Princess.

I'm told P&O will probably stage three plays, but only one has been decided - Art, which opened in London's West End in 1996.

It's a strange story, set in Paris. In a nutshell: Modern art lover Serge buys a painting which is nothing but a white canvas with some white lines on it. His friend of 15 years, Marc, calls it s*** and so begins a debate about what is art, what is friendship. Meantime you've got other friend Yvan adding fuel to the flames.

I've not seen it but it's supposed be clever and funny. It's also very easy to do on a ship, especially one with quite a small theatre, as it's all conversation between the characters or monologues to the audience.

Bringing West End plays to the high seas follows a growing trend among cruise lines to get away from the traditional song, dance and acrobatics stuff they usually put on in the theatre.

Royal Caribbean International has performances of Chicago on Allure of the Seas and Hairspray on Oasis of the Seas. When it comes to Europe this summer, Liberty of the Seas will be staging Saturday Night Fever.

Norwegian Cruise Line has the Blue Man Group in the theatre on Norwegian Epic, alternating with tribute singers from Legends in Concert.

I reckon P&O should also show the ever-popular Mousetrap (also easy as it only has one set) but I doubt they'd get the license given it's still going in the West End. Can you believe, it's in its 59th year!

Or how about a one-act play called Titanic that was staged in New York in the 1970s, all about three people (mum, dad and their son)  sitting down for dinner on the ill-fated ship. As they ponder why they haven't been seated at the captain's table all kinds of skeletons emerge from the woodwork. Kind of appropriate, don't you think?

What play would you like to see on Adonia? Post your suggestions below.

Fred Olsen Cruise Lines is changing the way it calculates its fuel supplement.

From Wednesday January 19, it will be charged as a percentage of the cruise fare instead of as a per person per day rate.

The cruise line says it brings them into line with the EU Package Directive and ABTA guidelines that require charges to be "proportionately rated to the cruise fare invoiced".

If that is the case, I say how unfair.

It means if you book a deluxe cabin or suite on a 14-night cruise, you'll pay a higher fuel supplement than someone in an inside cabin on the same voyage. Why? Is the person in the bigger cabin going to use more fuel?

The new fuel percentage will be 5%, the current per person per day rate is £4.

All I can add is, if you want a Fred Olsen cruise, and especially if you want to cruise with them in a decent cabin, book asap.

And certainly before Wednesday!

With liquid gold racing towards $100 a barrel, it's no surprise the dreaded fuel supplements are back with a vengeance.

For the Brits at least. The US lines are so far steering clear.

Oh and that's unless you book a cruise with Saga or Spirit of Adventure.

Not only do these sister cruise lines guarantee no fuel supplements, but they will also refund the difference, probably in the form of a cabin upgrade or other on-board extra, if the cost of your cruise falls after you've booked.

Paul Green, their spokesman, explained all about good money management and playing fair with customers.

I'm not sure what that says about the others, but anyway here's what they are charging:

All Leisure Group's Voyages of Discovery and Swan Hellenic are imposing a fuel supplement of £4 per person per day, to a maximum £150 per person, on cruises booked after February 1 for departure after April 1.

From February 1, Cruise and Maritime Voyages is levying a £4 per person per day supplement to a maximum £100 per person.

So if you hurry you can beat the charge with these three.

Cunard and P&O Cruises each started charging a £4 per person per day supplement to a maximum £150 per person at the beginning of the year.

Fred Olsen, in its wisdom, has switched from a daily per person flat fee to charging the fuel supplement as a percentage - 5.5% - of what you pay for your cruise. It works out as an extra £55 per person for every £1,000 cost of the cruise. It also means if you want a suite, you have to pay more.

Make sense of that.

I'm not one to gossip but I think Azamara Club Cruises, the upmarket two-ship brand owned by Royal Caribbean Cruises, could be close to ordering a new ship.

Larry Pimentel, their CEO, was in London last week to talk about how the cruise line has been faring since he made some seismic changes last year.

The word Club was added to the name, wine with dinner and gratuities were included in the price, English-trained butlers were provided for suite people and they started keeping the ships late or overnight in ports so passengers could see more of  the places they are visiting.

And then he said he would like to end his career building small ships. Azamara's two ships each hold 694 passengers. And he mentioned the second quarter next year.

I think that means watch this space.

More imminent, it would seem, is a new ship order from Royal Caribbean International.

Richard Fain, Royal Caribbean's chairman, confirmed they would ordering more ships when I was on Allure of the Seas last year but he gave the strongest hint yet that something was happening during a recent earnings call.

"We have been working intensively on developing a design that reflects our innovative spirit, but in an efficient package and we think that we are near to an acceptable outcome."

The rumour is they are developing a new series of ships, smaller than the Oasis-class monsters they have just launched, and that the order will go to Meyer-Werft, the German shipyard in Papenburg that built Disney Dream and the Celebrity Solstice-class ships.

I suspect Fred Olsen is regretting starting to charge their fuel supplement as a percentage of the price people pay for their cruise, penalising the high-spending suite folk they want to attract.

A press release late yesterday sought to "clarify" their position on the fuel supplement.

I would classify it as an attempt again to blame outside forces for the decision.

As we know, from January 19 they are charging 5.5% on top of what you pay for your cruise to cover the rising cost of fuel.

The exception is Black Watch's 2012 world cruise and Balmoral's 2012 long cruise around South America. If you book these, either the full cruises or one of the sectors, you won't pay any fuel supplement.

No I don't know why they are exempt either, but strikes me there could be rush for those cruises.

But they are also imposing a 4.5% retro-charge on bookings taken before December 23 2010 for departures from April 1 2011. So booking early, as I advised before, wouldn't have worked.

The words "shooting yourself in the foot" spring to mind.

Fred blames the switch away from the per person per night supplement to charging a surcharge as a percentage of the fare on the EU Package Travel Directive and ABTA requirements. It says that's what they require.

Maybe so. That doesn't make it any less unfair. And guess what? No one else is doing it. All the other cruise lines that are charging fuel supplements are sticking with the per person per night formula.

The only hope Fred passengers can have is that the price of Brent crude falls back to £45 a barrel, in which case they'll get the fuel supplement back in the form of on-board credit.

I wouldn't advise they hold their breath.

You know something is wrong when the captain comes on the loudspeaker in your cabin at 9am and asks everyone for their attention please.

And so started Sunday morning on Saga Pearl II, a day at sea as we sailed to Santiago de Cuba.

When I heard Alistair McLundie, master of SPII, sounding very grave I feared for Santiago.

In fact, Saga's insurers had said we were not allowed to call at La Guaira in Venezuela, from where I was going to visit Caracas, so we are visiting Aruba instead.

As we are already scheduled to go to Curacao, it means we are doing A and C of the so-called Dutch ABC islands (B is for Bonaire).

I joined this cruise for the Cuba calls so didn't mind too much but of course people complained. "But I only came on this cruise for Caracas."

Yeah right. Only when they realised a bit of compensation might be in the offing. They must think Saga is carac-as.

It meant the captain felt the need to make another announcement at lunchtime, basically repeating everything he had already said but not adding anything because, he claimed, he is not allowed to divulge why the insurers have a downer on Venezuela.

Still it gave us something to talk about over the roast beef and Yorkshire pudding. Yes really. Well it was Sunday lunchtime and this is an all-British Saga ship!

After all the history and culture of Cuba - of which more another time; I still have to tell you about Trinidad and Santiago de Cuba but it will be better when I can post pictures - it was time for some fun in Jamaica.

And what could be more fun than climbing a waterfall?

Climbing through the water at Dunn's River Falls, just outside Ocho Rios, really is the ultimate in touristy things to do, but it was great fun - much better than I had expected.

You start at the beach, hold hands with the people either side of you, and climb up over boulders through the ranging water. And it really was raging in some places. I had visions of being swept away a couple of times.

Happily you do most of it without holding hands as it's much easier not being pulled by other people. In all, the climb must have taken at least an hour.

Only six people, including me, from Saga Pearl II were adventurous to give it as go - all female, by the way - and two gave up soon after we started, so just four entrepid Saga souls made it to the top. Plus about 20 Brits and Canadians who were in our group.

By the time we finished I was soaked as I had done one of the rock slides and gone right under water, but still Milton, our guide, asked for a tip. Not quite sure where he thought my money was given I was wearing only a bikini and very soggy t-shirt. Luckily someone else from the group was nearby and lent me a few dollars.

But then all started to go wrong. Dragon lady, which was my name for our guide that day, was hassling us to get back to the mini buses as we were late.

Of course we were. It was Jamaica so it took ages for anything to start and the three ladies with me, who must have been in their late 60s/early 70s, were hardly going to sprint up the waterfall. They were brilliant for going up at all.

Dragon lady, who by now had lost all pretence of her "no problem this is Jamaica" attitude, hassled us back to the bus, then got huffy when I said I was going to change out of my wet clothes. The driver said, no problem. Just sit on your towel.

In soaking wet clothes for a two-hour drive back to the ship in Port Antonio? No way.

So I ended up getting changed in the car park, much to the annoyance of dragon lady, who even came to chivvy me along when I was half-dressed.

Not quite what you expect from a Saga cruise.

Or it wouldn't have been had I not endured being hassled the day before in Santiago - and all so we were not a few minutes late getting back for lunch on the ship.

Next stop is Curacao, where I am going on a tour to some caves. Let's hope it doesn't happen there or I really will start to get a complex.

With less than two weeks until the Telegraph Cruise Show opens at Olympia's Grand Hall in London, I do hope you've remembered to put the date in your diary and buy your ticket.

Every cruise lines you know - and some you've probably never heard of - will be there, dispensing brochures, advice, help and guidance as you plan your next cruise. You'll be able to find out about exploration, family, river and luxury cruising, hear from celebrity speakers and pick up not-to-be-missed show-only offers.

Yours truly will also be there, taking part in panels and moderating sessions in Theatre One on Saturday and Sunday with Jonathan Beaumont from the Travel Channel.

At 2pm I'm giving a talk on what's new in cruising this year in the Telegraph's Cruise Forum and I'll be around afterwards to answer questions so do come along if there's anything you want to ask - or even just to say hello.

The show is on Saturday March 26 from 10am to 5pm and on Sunday March 27 from 10am to 4pm. Tickets cost £6 in advance and £10 on the door.

I look forward to seeing you there.

After a lot of thought, I have decided to focus on writing just one blog. So from now on, you'll need to visit the Cruise Show website to read my words of wisdom.

You can find it at this link:

http://blog.cruisingshow.co.uk/

You'll find it's the same mixture of news, thoughts and comments about the cruise industry, with useful reviews of ships when I am away.

There's a place to leave comments, good or bad. I'd be delighted to hear from as many of you as possible.

Many thanks for reading this over the years and I hope to see you at my new virtual home.